couple of years ago I was in a live-firing exercise with a mortar platoon, we would direct fire for 81mm mortars in a range that has been in use for decades, at one point the one of the smokes fired by a mortar went over the backstop, but as the area behind it was closed off except for a maintenance road that we were monitoring we kept firing, the round generated some smoke before dying out. An hour or so later we noticed that there was smoke rising from behind the back stop, and it wasn't the kind of smoke that the smoke rounds we had been firing generated.
FO -team lead: "Doesn't that smoke look like something is actually burning?"
Me: "Yeah it does."
Instructor: "Time to call the fire truck to put it out"
Me: "...Say, how many duds fired by various mortar teams do you figure have landed there over the years?"
The fire truck came and put out the small bush fire without setting off any dud fragmentation grenades, but in the meantime we were all a bit nervous.
>>29934248
>Boring military stories.
You have to report duds, they are removed periodically.
Better story:
>Afghanistan 2008.
>155mm shooting ILLUM.
>Ammo form the fucking 60's
>Some burn up much too fast.
>Others just explode mid air.
>One burns through its chute.
>Falls to the ground behind some houses.
>Keeps burning.
Next day a farmer shows up at the FOB with the burned legs of a donkey.
He was given some money as compensation. Poor animal.
I'm not in the military, but i did work with my dad on base. it also left me with a distaste for marines
>Camp Lejeune
>dad was a contractor often fixing their jeeps and shit
>has me changing oil, antifreeze, tire rotations and mopping shit up. easy work.
>go outside for a smoke break
>God damned fetus in the parking lot
Like, what the fuck.
>>29934750
>Fetus
How the fuck did that get there? Pls explain
>>29934750
>>29935046
Fuck! You must deliver.
>>29934434
That reminds me of a story my math professor told me.
>inna Kosovo
>artillery unit, firing illum rounds so infantry can enforce UN curfew
>literally just firing illum rounds as fast as they burn, same angle because just trying to light up that area
>not really caring where the burned up rounds fall
>next morning finds out they all landed in one guys chicken coop
>roastedchicken.jpg
>had to compensate the farmer for it
>>29934248
>couple years ago
>working gate guard at major army base
>check IDs, occasional vehicle inspection
>working graveyard shift on a sunday
>get off at 430, everyone's coming in for morning PT
>decide I need a drink, I've got the rest of the day off
>go to shoppette, loads of people buying their shitty coffee/monster/smokes what have you
>wait in line with case of beer for 10 mins
>get to front of line
>cunt at the counter says "we can't sell ackahaw before 7am" all sassy like
>fucking walk of shame as I go put it on an aisle somewhere
>look up and there's my platoon sergeant and first sergeant looking at me
>platoon sergeant has this look of disgust on his face
I only had a few months left. the last year of my contract, once I knew I wanted to get out, I didn't really give a fuck
Oh and we carried 9mm Berettas so you know, it's relevant.
>>29934750
ok, this needs more explaining.
civie here, but military family.
>be over christmas time
>see family in texas
>have a few extra days so decide to take day trip to fort sill to see the tank museum
>get there
>see tank museum, now at restaurant
>see shit fucking screwed into the wall with bigass screws
>ask dad why
>hes been to sill before
>he looks at watch
>"just wait."
>BOOM
>BOOM
>BOOM
>fucking live fire exercises
>we're right on the edge of the range
>plates, pictures, teeth start rattling
>walk outside
>massive wall of WP smoke
>glorious smell of burnt gunpowder
pretty cool
>>29934434
Those old illum rounds need to be hit with a wooden mallet along their sides. It seems the illum charge will stick to the side of the projectile causing a wobble that when the illum charge is ejected will cause it to burn through the shute cords and fall to earth.
Learned that the hard way after Killer Kilo burned a couple hundred acres of Camp Pendleton up including some houses near Del Mar
>>29934750
That's OK, most Marines would probably have a distaste for you.
It was probably a dead baby bird that fell out of a nest and your cherry ass imagination got all carried away.
>>29937327
what the hell is an illum round even made of?
I know smoke is WP, but what the fuck is illum, cause it sounds like some nasty shit.
>>29937349
I always just assumed it was short of illumination
I was Guard Commander for the barracks, it was a Saturday and the place was deserted.
An old guy rocks up to the gate in a ute and says he has something he thinks is army.
The picket calls me over and I take a look in th back of the ute.
A 105mm HEAT tank round in fired with the case.
The round and the case are all dented, scratched and generally looking like it had fallen off the back of a truck doing 110 Km/h with propellent leaking out of one split in the case and explosive filer of yhe HEAT round visible in one of the cracks.
I pull the old guy away and evac the building, taking the desk phone and adding the fifty meter spool of phone card to it ( way before mobile phones).
I call the ammo techs in and call the duty officer.
The ammo techs arrive and I brief them on the situation.
The techs inspect the round and than pull it out. One of them walks it to an open area while the other interviews the old guy.
After the old guy has left the techs fill a trailer with sand bags leaving a 105 shaped hole in the middle. The round goes in the trailer and the techs head for the demo range.
An hour later there is a thud from the direction of the range.
The CO sent the old guy a letter of thanks and another letter to the local newspaper requesting that the locals do not pick up things that look like bombs but call the police.
The Meathammer Incident
>Inna Greece, working with Hellenic SOF dudes
>Individual Movement/shooting lanes
>One of our SAW gunners is a quiet, nerdy dude.
>absolute monster on the SAW
>he jumps down from a low wall, ripping the crotch out of his pants
>completes the lane 100m later
>notices (female) Greek SGM staring and blushing
>looks down
>not wearing underwear
>calmly walks back to us, third leg in plain sight
>everyone is fucking silent
>referred to as "Meathammer" from then on, by Americans and Greeks
>>29937448
gentlemen, this is /k/oko.
we have been blessed by the presence of a god.
also your saw gunner seems god tier.
>tfw only stories i have are ones dad told me about a dude ripping up the motorpool bay and another guy who managed to lose a fucking crane
>>29937448
Holy fuck it's /k/oko
>WW1
>Family name sounds like "En avant" ("Forward" in French)
>Superior officer calls for them by their last name
>He mishears, rushes out of the trenches and starts charging the enemy
>Gets mowed down
>>29937466
>>29937485
You act like I don't post here. The trip's just so I don't have to re-introduce myself every thread.
Anyway,
>Poland, Atlantic Resolve
>Be on CQ with new-ish LT
>Doesn't seem to understand how being in a well lit room, 50m away from the woodline, with the only loaded 30rd FORCEPRO magazine is a bad idea.
>decide to tell him about our possible enemy, the Russians, who were at the time rather cross with our sudden presence in their neighboring country while they were invading Ukraine
>explain the different weapons, to include the VSS
>explain the soldiers most likely soldiers to use that particular weapon
>watch him slowly back away from the window, sweating
>spend the rest of the night using my PEQ-15 laser to guide stray cats around the camp
>>29937014
on exercises in germany 1980s
the local farmers would try to get us to park
our tanks and trucks in their orchards
we were told it was because
the government would have to compensate them
not only for the tree
but for the apples it would also produce
and the trees that could be grown from them
not sure if its true
but you have to admire their business sense
>>29937327
I hate this old school tough guy persona every marine tries to adopt. We get it, you thought you'd be badass so you joined the Marines. No one's impressed by obnoxious faggotry
>>29937576
Who is best girl from Jormungand?
>>29937679
Chiquita.
There's probably a reason why Lehm married her 4 times.
>>29937629
>business sense
more like lazy fucks trying to scheme the gov
>>29934248
11C here. WP causes fires all the time. Literally every field exercise I have been in with Mortars we have started a fire on the range dropping WP. It's not dangerous, like at all. We've had stack of 120MM HE rounds a few 100 meters from small field fires. I understand the FOs being a bit on edge because they don't understand mortars, but no real mortarmen would be remotely concerned.
>>29937308
Bullshit. Sills impact zone is 20 miles away from main post. It's illegal to even be out there without a range pass. I lived there for 2 years.
>>29937662
So what do you call your old school tough guy persona?
>>29937700
That smile, those dead eyes.
>>29937349
Illum rounds are interesting. They have the same size case as an HE round but are hollow and have a hole in the bottom of the casing.
Inside is an illum charge and parachute. There is a normal fuse on the outside where you set the time for the illum to eject from the shell.
The illum charge and chute eject and the metal casing (shell) continues to earth
The Fire Direction Control team should calculate the firing solution to get the shell over the target for illumination, the time for the fuse, and then a safe trajectory for the shell to continue to earth.
If done wrong.....
Was working as an FO for a 155 battery. Radio Net lights up with screams for a cease fire cease fire (a very oh shit moment).
A mortar squad reports they are taking friendly fire. Start going over grids with them and they are no where near where I am firing. I had just fired a six round illum mission so was pretty sure it was not my mission.
The word came down to fire one more illum round. Sent it in. Fired mission. Radio lights up again with cease fire from the mortar squad.
Turns out that FDC did not calculate the trajectory right and the roughly 50 pound empty shells were landing at their pos.
No one was hurt, except the poor FDCer who came up with the firing data.
>>29937809
I call it Rico's roughnecks or little man syndrome (because Marines are always short for so reason)
>>29937881
jesus. at least it was just the casings, and not the charges themselves.
paladin 155 battery or stationary?
paladins are fucking cool, I'd love to learn more about them.
>>29937448
MEATHAMMMER!
>>29937924
>Inna Romania
>for some reason we're training with Romanian SF dudes
>Doing machine gun shit the whole time
>240s, SAWs, PKMs, none of the cool opr8r stuff
>expend all ammo, just sitting around waiting for M4 demonstration to finish
>get pulled aside by Romanian Team Sergeant
>wants someone to try out the shoot & move course they have set up for the AK
>given AK-74 and 3 mags
>get a decent time, Romanian dude thinks I could do it faster
>tells me to take my armor off and try again
>blaze through the next lane, doing every tacticool position I can think of because no supervision/Romanians think it's the hypest shit
>MAG CHANGE
>tacticool reload
>finish up with the fastest time among the 4 US troops to go through the course, Romanians kicked my ass
>Get 2 ODA shirts from Romanian Team Sergeant that night
>>29937801
Sill is a super shit hole tell me you were forced to live there annon.
>>29938517
>Romanians go into trading frenzy
>End up getting a uniform, woodland DPM wet weather set, desert DPM wet weather set, gypsy knife, 3 berets, and a bunch of patches
I fucking love trading shit.
Still not sure how I feel about Gypsies.
>>29938679
>I fucking love trading shit
>still don't know how I feel about Gypsies
You are one
>>29938796
I may fucking be by this point now that I think about it...
I still can't dance though, at least not in the US.
>>29938844
Just give it some practice.
Forgive my ignorace of who you are but I assume you're with some highspeed unit and seem to love the shit out of it (for good reason)
How would you feel if you get sent to Garrison Unit and be put to do nothing and told they do more college related shit than military and no you can't go to the gym when free only after release
>>29939054
I'm white.
The only business I have on a dance floor is fighting my way across it to get to where the vodka lives.
>>29939129
Fair enough.
Gypsies also play steel drums, I think? You could get on that shit if you need a new discipline.
>>29939095
The 173rd Airborne was stretched across Europe during the situation in Ukraine as a show of capability, nothing too high speed, but interesting nonetheless.
And where I am now? I'm in charge of 2 guys who make my job fucking easy, all they want to do is shoot guns and lift weights. My 1SG is fucking awesome and I have better stories and more jumps than any of the guys who went on the last deployment.
I have about 18 months left on my contract, then it's time for me to put myself on the market. There's a Czech dude who want's me to work with him, I may do that.
>>29938679
your stories about trading shit makes me want to join the military
I know people who went airborne and are in SF units right now, I really wish the best for them but I just wonder how do they do it?
Can anyone really become something like you if they wanted to and worked hard enough or is it like a one thing you can't explain because you just 'do it'
>MFW I genuinely have an interest in doing these types of things and know you have to put in the work but get mocked by almost everyone I know
>>29937308
>>29937801
Is correct. The artillery ranges are far as fuck from anything. Though if you are near the ranges you can hear the rounds whizzing through the air.
>>29939260
Don't believe the hype. I've been in 6 years and have had 0 opportunities to trade shit.
>>29937899
Leathernecking
>>29937327
>Learned that the hard way after Killer Kilo burned a couple hundred acres of Camp Pendleton up including some houses near Del Mar
>including some houses near Del Mar
>mfw Del Mar is 15 miles from Pendleton with about four cities in between them
What are you talking about, nigger?
>>29937629
in Finland we have a rumor that when ever the Army holds its annual live-firing exercises at Rovajärvi in Lapland, the reindeer herders drive their retarded animals into the target area in the hopes that the artillery will turn them into mincemeat & so that they can demand compensation.
>>29937785
OP here, here the thinking seems to be that duds that landed between firing positions and the backstop are disposed of by detonating them while the ones that go over the backstop are left there, because it would take forever to locate the dud among the thick vegetation, meaning there could be any number of duds there, waiting to explode in the heat generated by the fire/after a firefighter 'finds' one while putting out the fire.
a few stories from my father who served in a SSR at a firing range,
>leftover grenades from training conscripts
>official says theres too much paper work to send them back
>he spent half a day throwing live hand grenades on the range with a friend of his
>rinse and repeat for 7,62
>ifvs and tanks use part of the range
>stole 30 mm ammo from the ifvs at the end of their practice
>tried to use it for targets on the small arms range
>official notices strange targets left out on range the next day and uses the slav equivalent of EOD
>conscripts spend half a day shooting the 30 mm shells with poor effect
>>29939129
>is fighting my way across it to get to where the vodka lives.
spoken like a Finn, is your family from around here?
towards the end of a week-long exercise we are told that there's still a pile of 7.62x39 left over from when we zeroed our rifles for the "lasertag" -part of the exercise; I and three or four others from command platoon platoon (it was worth it to be temporarily assigned to comman platoon after all) each fill three magazines and start shooting, including bursts of full-retard (it was fun)
Later we heard that going full-retard is forbidden on that range, what ever, they didn't ask who did it, and we didn't tell...
>>29937420
Just chuck er in the ute!
>>29937448
I have a larger than fist size hole in my combat pants crotch and a female troop leader close to my age. Thank fuck I dont go commando
Some of the sketchier shit I've done is drive my coyote onto a recently used tank range and had to dodge live/dud 120mm shells that litter the ground. Not running one of those fuckers over in a 13 ton tin can.
This was from a flight we did in the Ospreys:
>Be burning holes in the sky
>Pilots decide to do some tactical approaches into an airport
> "Caution Birds in vicinity of airport"
> "Copy"
> First approach no problem, discontinue approach and start lap around field
> On downwind for 2nd approach...
> BIRDS EVERYWHERE
> Eat 16 birds along airframe (smallish birds)
> Declare emergency and land
> Blood and feathers everywhere, engine coated with remains, props covered in blood, we looked like the mad max of the sky
> Can't fly back until maintenance checks out the aircraft
> Pilots end up driving us back in a rented van while we play edward scissor 40 hands with the FE's
As a Civie, I do love my job and being able to fly regularly
>>29941201
It's a rumor, getting the compensation involves a lot of shitty bureucracy.
>tfw I try to herd mine away from the live fire zone
>tfw the retarded animals go back to the area because it's got more lichen for them to eat
>tfw the retarded animals come back skinnier than before because the shooting and explosions scare them and they won't eat when scared
>>29941295
No, we're 7th generation Americans.
Too much mixing of different shades of white for me to distinguish anymore.
>>29942716
you can be an honorary Finn then
>be me
>on sentry duty, technically aerial surveillance
>the sentry post is a lean-to/bivouac on a shore of a lake
>it's dark (this being december in Finland)
>the telephone rings, it's the platoon leader informing you that a friendly unit participating in the exercise is passing through our base & that for the sake of the exercise they don't know there are only friendlies in the area
>keep watching the lake, hear a platoon moving on foot somewhere behind you
>they are part of that friendly unit, so ignore them
>suddenly hear their platoon leader order them to take defensive positions
>wtf.jpg
>listen for a moment: they seem to have done so just for the hell of it; they are unaware of the sentry post you are manning
>step out lighting a cigarrette and saying you are already watching the lake
>the platoon freezes, not knowing what to do
>have a brief exchange with the platoon leader
>they leave.
guys from their unit had apparently detained one of the guys from my platoon a bit earlier because they really didn't know there were friendlies in the area, the reactions of the guys in the platoon were priceless.
>>29944233
pic related, that's the lean-to I was manning at the time
>>29944291
looks comfy
>>29944606
it served its purpose, I did consider moving my rucksack and bedroll there to escape various watch duties such as firewatch and especially the comm duty (watching the signals equipment to make sure that the communications were working like they were supposed to)...
>Corsica 2015
>working with 2rep Mountaineers
>rappelling off the Citadel
>Calvi is busy, full of tourists and shit, watching our asses in faded multicam and M4s walking around their tourist attraction
>safety brief, hook up, descend from the wall, easy right?
>there's tourists t the bottom of the wall, they all think we're some kind of SOF unit.
>guess nobody's heard of the 173rd after all
>start getting into more advanced shit, take away safety
>eventually get into a race, who can descend the wall the fastest?
>put my goggles on, grab my weapon, rig for aussie (face first) rappel
>end up winning because the other 2 didn't have goggles on and got shit blown into their faces
>>29937448
BASED /k/oko delivers
>>29935071
I see what you did there...
>>29939878
Its an area within camp pendleton, not the actual city of del mar
>>29937520
Was there a French soldier whose family name sounded like "Je me rends" in WW2?
>>29937749
They fuck you, you fuck them. Evrybody needs a good fucking, anon
>>29938679
neat.jpg
