You're captured and headbagged in a detention facility somewhere for some reason
How do you fight boredom?
>>29766417
By masturbating profusely.
>>29766420
came here to say this
>>29766417
99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around 98 bottles of beer on the wall...
>>29766420
>>29766423
But your hands are tied behind your back
>>29766417
when I got locked in a room for hours on end at the cop shop, I moved the chairs around, leaned my chair into the corner and propped my feet on the table and went to sleep
Fuck you, you gonna lock me up try to get me to go insane?
I'll take a god damn nap and put my feet on your furniture, cunt
>>29766432
do this
loudly
>>29766435
I still have a mouth
>>29766435
>needing hands to masturbate
>not praying 5 times a day
Browse /k/
Sing loudly.
Masturbate.
Sleep.
Play imagination games in my head.
sing stupid songs
make stupid and offensive guesses on whoever is watching me
ask many times for a good meal or a prostitute
confess assassination of jfk , hitler , and admit participation in the pillaging of constantinople
>>29766417
Do i have a cellmate? If so, i have sex with my cellmate
>>29766435
Honestly I'll just rub myself on the floor until I cum.
>>29766432
And this at the same time.
I hope they all watch and decide to let me go for being retarded
>>29766711
Can I be your cellmate?
>>29766435
I could still reach my boi pussy and massage it.
>>29766710
>confess assassination of jfk , hitler , and admit participation in the pillaging of constantinople
Golden. Gotta remember that one
>>29766435
Lay on your tummy and work that magic. Then once you get enough fluid. Lap it all up and spit it in the face of the next gourd that comes to check you. +2 points if you get him in the eye
Came here to say masturbate, I shoulda known.
>>29766724
l-looks like we don't have a choice
It doesnt count as gay in here, right?
>>29766814
Oh it's most definitely gay, but I don't give a care.
>>29766757
But that's TMS
I had enough trouble with that when i was a kid no fucking way am i starting that again
>>29766855
We can just say we were raped in prison if anyone finds out, k?
>tfw always had a good imagination
>tfw can happily sit around for hours with no external stimuli just running through stories in my head
They'd probably just get me in my sleep, though.
I sleeptalk like a motherfucker, probably for the same reasons as above.
>>29766757
This is some silence of the lambs bullshit right her
Shit
>>29766417
bite a guard in the jugular when they feed me.
>>29766757
How rude.
>>29766869
It's what?
>>29767654
Traumatic masturbatory syndrome :(
>>29766435
Never stopped me before
>>29767800
masturbating because you are traumatized by your dad beating your mom only makes your dad more angry. it never stops.
had some good keks in this thread thanks /k/ for making my day a bit better
Attempt to fall over in the chair as much as possible all while yelling "WEBBLES WOBBLE BUT THEY DONT FALL DOWN" fall over "FUCK!" once they pick me up, repeat process. If they don't then I would attempt to get up myself, then repeat.
>>29766874
Uh....I'm being raped
Belt out various 80s hits like Africa, Land Down Under, Take On Me, etc. until I get beaten unconscious or other prisoners start harmonizing.
>>29768589
Me too ;-;
Calling bottom tho, i dont fuck dudes
By not getting captured.
>>29769095
implying you'd be awake before gubirmint agents or spec ops bag your shit and throw you into gitmo
Sing popular songs with deliberately slightly wrong lyrics and melodies. Starting with the best of Elton John. They'll either shoot me or turn me loose.
Pretend I'm in a high end sex dungeon and repeatedly demand to be told how much each 'service' costs. If they tell me it's free, I'll giggle and explain that I'm pretty close to being overdrawn so I'm not sure if I can afford their services, fun as they are.
>>29768603
>land down under
>not who can it be now
It's like you don't even men at work, cunt
>>29766417
start screaming "the song that never ends" as loud as I possibly can, if they gag me I'm just gonna start moaning really loud and make them really uncomfortable
>>29769629
Holy fuck, you would trigger even the most stoic of operators if you sung famous songs with purposely wrong lyrics for hours.
My plan is to sing every rock and roll classic I can think of with wrong lyrics.
>>29766417
masturbate profusely
Design complex machines in my head.
>>29770264
Just imagine this sung in a slow, lilting out of tune fashion:
>I remember when rock was fun
>Me and Suzie had so much.. ...fun?
>holding hands and skidding stones
>Had an old gal Chevy and a place on my own
>But the biggest click I ever got
>was singing a thing called the Crocodile Rock
>While the other kids were Rocking Round the Croc
>we were singing and dancing to the Crocodile Rock
When I get bored I have a wild active imagination on what to do when I have world domination and when I'm done fantasizing I see how much numbers I can count to and when jerking it I'll just remember all the fap materials I fapped to from Victoria secrets to my porn sets
>>29766435
Your point being?
>>29770471
>world domination fantasy
>fapping to Victoria's secret
>run on sentence and erratic grammar
This is an 18+ site, hyper middle-school Anon.
>>29766417
Revert to /tg/ behavior and start trying to create a fictional universe setting for an RPG and then start fleshing out quest missions for gaming sessions that will never happen.
>>29770380
Jesus.
attempt to play 21 questions with a guard, even if he says no I will keep guessing.
>>29769629
>>29770264
>Hey hey mama said the way you move, gotta make you sweat gotta make you groove
>I'M ON A HIIIIIIGHWAAAY IN HELL!
>Take me down to the Paradise City, all the grass is green and the girls are pretty
>END OF PASSION PLAY! CRUMBLING AWAY! I AM YOUR SELF DESTRUCTION!
>Ooooooh you're gonna take me home tonight. Oooooooooh down beside the red firelight. Oooh you're gonna let it all hang out fat bottom girls you make the rock roll world go rooouuund
I think I'd do pretty well.
>>29770211
I prefer "The Song That Gets on Everybody's Nerves".
I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES
EVERYBODY'S NERVES
EVERYBODY'S NERVES
I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES AND THIS IS HOW IT GOOEEEEES
>>29766423
same
Go full autism.
Pretend to host a radio talk show everyday for 2 hours. Even do voices for "callers".
>>29774308
bonus points for radio graffiti
>>29766417
Count backwards from 1000 in intervals of seven.
>>29766417
sleep
>>29766417
Spend about one minute studying each & every square inch of an imaginary planet.
>>29766435
Binding is my fetish.
>>29766417
Collecting shit, piss, and cum in a little cocktail and throwing it at the guards to try to give them a disease.
>>29766417
By shouting allahu ackbar before detonating the imaginary suicide vest I hypothetically would not have.
>>29767358
Are you me? How to stop sleep talking? Getting weird with the roommates but I don't know what I said.
>>29775202
I'm pretty sure sleep deprivation is a torture technique anon. They might try it on you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BALcooxaYao
>>29774308
Holy fuck, kek.
>>29775166
You need to make explosion and screaming noises too whike flailing around
i'm a master at waiting. it's a pre-smart phone skill i think. nobody has patience to just fuckin sit and wait any more. world building is my favorite way to pass time. my insane delusions would put tolkein to shame.
>>29766435
What is this, amateur hour?
>>29773548
Someone else is doing this?
>>29773848
Pure evil
>>29773548
So be a fa/tg/uy in his average day?
>>29766420
Same
>>29770380
William Shatner singing this
>>29775686
This. Been mentally filling this beast out when I get bored at work lately.
>>29766747
My Uncle loves admitting he was on the grassy knoll.
>>29775686
>it's a pre-smart phone skill i think.
It is. I can deal with sitting around for a couple hours but my little brother goes insane after ten minutes.
![MindPalace-1024x600[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/CG7Wijb.jpg "MindPalace-1024x600[1].jpg")
>>29766417
Use your human disposition to spatial memory to build a memory palace beforehand of enjoyable places and stories then mentally escape there.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Method_of_loci
