*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
Someone just broke into your house.
You have 30 seconds to grab a weapon.
What's nearby?
I've got my nugget and ammo in closet, the real question is do I shoot or use the bayonet
K31. not the best weapon for home defense but it get's the job done.
У вac cтopoжeвых мeдвeдeй чтoль нeт, блядь.
My delica 4
*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
Buddy you're a boy make a big noise
Playing in the street gonna be a big man some day
You got mud on your face
You big disgrace
Kickin' your can all over the place
Singin'
We will we will rock you
We will we will rock you
>>29196107
PS90 or .357 Magnum Desert Eagle are only feet away.
My dick...no lie
>>29196107
AK47
Glock19
Colt1911
Sword
So many choices. What I use depends on his race.
Whitey/Mexicants gets the guns
Afros get the sword.
>>29196199
Asians get the d?
the warhammer.
>>29196107
6" Kabar
Can't hasguns in the barracks :c
In order of combat effectiveness:
Pocket knife.
Large scissors.
A fairly well sharpened pencil.
An airshit AKS74U that can make some damage if I hit with the stock.
Beeing noguns is suffering.
>>29196218
I didn't think about them, the crime stats are to low but if they did I would capture him and rape his boipucci until he becomes my femboy slut.
>BOOM BOOM
>Oh fuck I just broke my foot
Feelsgoodnothavingshittyamericandoors.png
PPK/S appendix between me and the desk powpowpwo
>>29196107
looks like the bastard already stole my shoes, only thing close to me is a machete, this will end messy
>>29196247
East or west coast devil?
My mom
>>29196107
glock 19 loaded with hornady critical defense
>>29196227
That thing looks ridiculously long for indoors.
Nigger do you know how thick my door/frame/moat/crocs/chains/drawbridge/boiling-oil-cauldrons are?
It would take an undead army of the damned to breach these walls.
Also I'd just use my 12 gauge mossman.
>>29196432
it is ridiculously long, i believe it is an inch longer than a nugget.
it's also happens to be the closest and most readily available.
I can make it to any of the three guns or several knives in thirty seconds. Hell, I could probably get down to the bottom floor of the apartment building and back in 30 seconds. Make it a real challenge, like 5 seconds, and I'm stuck with a pocket knife.
Glock 26.
Cold Steel Rajah.
>>29196274
Eh, if the airshit looks realistic enough, no Neon and the like, you might scare the average thief into shitting himself and scattering. At the very least it'll probably cause a moment of hesitation before you try and bash his face with the stock.
>>29196107
I have a very large knife, and a dull steel training sword. Sword would break bones fairly well.
Fuckin' noguns status is shit. Only a year more and I'll be done with college and join the club.
Six cartridges of low-recoil .357 goodness.
Stun gun, 4 foot wooden rod, pepper spray, fire extinguisher, several folding knives, duffel bag full of auto maintenance tools.
No guns though, I'm in a semi truck.
>>29196107
Some weird ass indian knife and an air rifle
But 2 be fair in my country, they probably dont have a weapon themselves
>>29196432
>>..."warhammer"
He ain't planning to shoot with the gun anon
>>29196558
>low recoil
Low power.
Well, there's an FAL about 4 feet away from me. Not sure how well 7.62x51 FMJ would do in a HD scenario in the city, though.
>>29196717
It'd do extremely well. It'd take out the home invader here, and the home invader six blocks down in one shot.
Collateral damage is just a derogatory term for "Efficiency"
>>29196705
No, using full power rounds. It's the design of the gun, not the rounds.
>>29196107
Over-penetration is a myth
>>29196705
>>29197012
It doesn't magically recoil less, it just goes straight into your hand.
Auto 5, now in 7 shot version.
>>29196616
Cats are very effective weapons
>>29196357
>Implying a hopped up group of nogs couldn't break down a wooden door.
Have fun getting raped europoor.
>>29196107
Get this bad boy
>>29198321
A machete.
>>29198258
I would like to see them try, my new door swing outwards, and is more than a simple wooden door, it's heavy composite.
and inside is me and pic related.
welcome to Europooristan.
>>29196357
Do you yuropeeens really believe this ? I know you guys are jealous and that is why you constantly try and bash us but is this what it's come to ? An attempt to make an assumption that we have one universal American door type, and that it's weaker then European doors ? Are you really attacking doors ? Ton concept of American doors ? Embarrassing desu yurop on suicide watch for sporadic and eradic behavior
Stevens 320 pump action 12 gauge.
>>29198321
Looking to pick one of these up. Does the .38 run as reliably with +P as the 10mm?
>>29199090
Careful.
Using your gun as a bong can fuck with the internals.
>>29199223
Nigga are you Poseidon?
>>29197054
That is sex
>>29196107
I'd use my tactical pooping gun(P22) to fight my way to the better guns.
>>29199252
bongs go to jail for life if they defend themselves.
the rest of us have it a little better.
Ivan use old Soviet cudgel, or vodka bottle?
>>29199232
To me with the hollow point 38. It can do more damage then the 10 mm
>>29199316
Penis shaped object
>>29196107
Type 30 Bayonet.
>TENNO HEKAI BANZAI
Silenced Ruger .22
Too lazy to post pic, but i keep a hand nugget as a desk gun. That or a sawn off in the hutch 7 feet away.
>>29196357
>implying I couldn't break your lock/door...
>>29196357
Until you realize that you have windows.
>>29199280
The old trick is to wire a car battery to your doorknob at night.
>>29196107
Have a AR-15 to my right within arm reaching distance and a pistol under my pillow to my left which is in arm reaching distance.
>>29199611
That wouldn't work. Unless you had only one end connected to the knob and the then had a way for the individual to complete the circuit
one of these. and I'm completely naked. I may not have much of an advantage, but I have to imagine a naked fat guy with a machete-looking-knife charging at you screaming and probably crying a little might affect the intruder psychologically.
>>29196107
Yugo Mauser
It's fully loaded on a bench right next to my bed. All I gotta do is flip the safety to the left and I'm set. Got my active ear pro right next to it too so I can hear better than I normally can and my ears won't be fucked from when I fire my baby into the fuckhead who thought the nicest house on the block would be an easy hit.
>>29196199
>not keeping a muzzleloader/smle for defense from melanin marauders
>ishiggy
my mother.
they likely dont want a fight. the door is there, i tell them to leave. if they dont, i call the police.
>>29199316
Please burn "for her pleasure" into it in nice cursive.
>not carrying at home
Got my Beretta strapped to my hip right now. Since you're giving me 30 seconds though I'll pop a mag in my AR and some buckshot in my Mossberg. There's no kill like overkill.
>>29196107
>30 whole seconds
Grab my HD ar and then play this as loud as it goes on my home stereo
https://youtu.be/ec0XKhAHR5I
>>29199914
predicted the song before I even saw.
>>29199963
This sounds like actual PTSD
Swiss army knife, boxcutter, screwdriver, if necessary 2 guitars for bludgeoning.
AR pistol with 10.5 inch barrel, bright ass light with pressure pad on vertical grip, and a red dot
>>29199223
Story time
>be 11 with no dad living in a house with mom, grandma, and brother
>2am crash at the front door
>people in the house!
>WAKEUP!.jpg
>dogs going nuts (they are little but they know shit is going down)
>two men in mud room trashing everything and can't get through second door.
>run down stairs, grab anything to defend ourselves
>two men trapped in a small mudroom where the second door is locked with a door knob lock screaming "LET US IN!!!"
>scared shitless, holding hammer ready to bash some brains in
>I'm standing there with a hammer, look over and my brother is there next to me with a fucking pitchfork!
>Mom screaming (being worthless) grandma on the phone with the cops holding a .38 revolver (empty though)
It was the some of the craziest shit I've ever had to deal with. The cops came and caught the two fuckers but let them go because they were "good boys who had too much to drink" or something. Pretty sure one of the cops is fucking the mom so the 20 year old men get off. They had a blanket with them and destroyed our cabinet in the mudroom and got into or coat closet and threw everything on the front lawn. Fucking horrible but they got away with that shit. Anyway, it was one of the things that I remember me and my brother ready to kill with a hammer and a pitchfork. Sorry, seeing a pitchfork set me off.
>>29196136
>>29196107
All my guns are within 30 seconds of me right now.
>>29197054
>>29199790
YOU CALLED?
>>29200500
Fellow Milquetoast here. I hear you.
A similar situation occurred in my formative years.
My father is an MD and our neighbor is an attorney/judge.
Those "Good Ol' Boys" got 20 years.
It's nice to be a White Man.
>>29196616
Is that cat registered? Do you really need something that fluffy?
I have a grosse messer kept under my pillows, gun is in a safe about 5 feet away. I think a man in his boxers attacking a robber with a giant ass sword would be a sight to see.
A three year old toddler ... then a m9a3 Inna lockbox
>>29200675
Doing better off in my adult years but those years sucked. Thanks anon.
![e921896bb24ca01a7eeb48363e0df960[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/tqmLraQ.jpg "e921896bb24ca01a7eeb48363e0df960[1].jpg")
CZ-75 in my nightstand with 16 hollow points. But I just might draw the Swiss K31 Bayonet I've got next to it. A foot of steel is just a bit intimidating.
>>29196136
Everydamntime.
>>29199223
And then there's this motherfucker who is a member of The Masked Avengers!
>>29199555
>Not using the K12
Small-time niggas.
>>29196107
My fuck stick
>>29201145
>picking the loudest option for a burglary
Frankly, I also made the wrong choice. I should have picked the rabbit tool.
>>29200500
what the fuck is a mudroom
My frying pan of hurt.
>>29201464
it's a vestibule usually found at the primary entrance of a house, typically equipped with a closet, cabinet, and/or washer/dryer, whose sole purpose is to be where you take your (muddy, hence the name) boots off instead of tracking it to the rest of the house.
>>29201464
> a casual, generally secondary entryway intended as an area to remove and store footwear, outerwear, and wet clothing before entering the main house. As well as providing storage space, a mud room serves to increase the cleanliness of a house proper.
I have a knife in my drawer
>tfw not allowed to possess guns
>>29196558
What is this thing?
Smatchet.
THANK YOU BASED FAIRBAIRN
>>29201571
Is that due to where you live banning guns for most people, or is it specifically for you?
>>29196107
Me
>Zastava CZ999
>Remington 870
>Savage Model 11 (disqualified)
Roommate 1
>Kahr CW40
>S&W Model 629 (not loaded)
>AR15
>Winchester Model 1894 (not loaded)
Roommate 2
>Springfield XD-S 40
Between the three of us, we can fire 16 rounds of 9mm, 14 rounds of .40 S&W, 30 rounds of 5.56, and 3 rounds of 20Ga 3" magnum buckshot without anyone having to reload, and we all keep spare magazines loaded next to our handguns.
Our rooms are all on the same end of the house and in the same hallway, so we could theoretically cover each other while one of us reloads or goes to get another firearm.
In addition, all of us work different shifts, so as long as all three of us are home on any given night, there is always somebody awake.
So yeah, pretty much anybody who busts in here is fucked.
>>29201815
Oh and I have a loud as fuck stereo, would be tempted to blast this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6Cyw0tonwc
>>29201712
Specifically for me
Model 29-2 in .44 Magnum is my default "thinking gun." Home invader done goofed.
>>29201965
How do you maneuver that 5-foot sword-of-God through a doorway?
>>29196107
i'm literally sitting at my computer in full kit finger fucking my AR
>>29201670
May your invaders have crippling injuries
>>29201976
Criminal or mental/psychological?
>>29196107
Absolute closest are, marlin 1895, pardner 20 gauge, remington 1858, and a mossberg 500.
>>29196107
Ar-15 and a j-frame .38. And a plate carrier. He has to make it up a flight of stairs and down a very long hallway.
>>29196117
Good enough
>>29196123
Good Enough
>>29196134
Shit
>>29196136
OVERKILL
>>29196162
Very good
>>29196163
too small of a bore
>>29196199
Fantastic
>>29196227
Very good
>>29196247
Shit, but since in barracks you get a pass
>>29196274
Super shit
>>29196380
Decent enough
>>29196425
Good
>>29196497
Good
>>29196546
Shit
>>29196558
Good
>>29196567
Shit
>>29196616
Good
>>29196717
Great
>>29197015
Great
>>29197054
Great
>>29199192
Good
>>29199223
Hahahahahahahhah shit
>>29199284
under powered
>>29199511
Under powered
>>29199531
lol, good
>>29199630
Great
>>29199669
Shit
>>29199701
Good enough
>>29199869
Good enough
>>29200131
Shit
>>29200429
Fantastic
>>29200574
Fantastic maybe
>>29200783
Ehhhh, gun would be better as a first choice instead of a sword
>>29200909
Good enough
>>29201571
Shit
>>29201815
God mode
>>29201965
Great
>>29202004
Pretty good
>>29202393
Pretty good
>>29196107
I'd grab my ar15 that's kept under a pile of clothing on my bed since i'm a depressed slob and my wife would grab her sig p229 thats on her computer desk.
I'd wait until I heard at least one of my roomies being dead before I did anything though. I'm to tempted to shoot them my self so i'm just gonna hope some one else does the deed for me if I get to enjoy a home invasion.
too shroomed out first i offer him a bannana if he deny then i dont shoot
Sig 226 legion
>>29202759
in response to that image:
I would tactically shit myself.
I have this with hollow points. How fucked am I?
Corkscrew, ozium and my alarm clock that I could swing around on its cord and hit someone with.
>>29196107
I would use my class 4 laser to blind the intruder, and I would also have one of my machetes in case that wasn't enough.
>>29196107
2 ar's, cz75 compact, sig 226, p64, shitty 22lr pistol, shitton of ammo, all in digital safes. Ready to go...
But, I don't live where people break into houses. Not a poorfag.
>>29201965
>dem trencher bayonets
>>29199090
>door swings outwards
>meaning the hinges are outside
>implying they won't just take the hinges off and come fuck your shit up
Springfield XDs .45 4 inch, to my right.
Ruger LC9S Pro, also to my right.
Glock 42, again, to my right.
Chiappa Lil' Badger to my left. Poor choice but lolz-worthy.
.410 in the bedroom, must be getted to before getting to bad guy, so there's that.
Come to think of it I really need to get a fucking 12 gauge and a .308 pig killer.
>>29202990
I should note that by pig killer I mean hog killer, not trying to shoot cops.
>>29202759
I'm about to join the legion club in a couple of weeks. How you liking yours so far? Too precious for carrying on a kydex chest mount?
Pepperspray and a stick
> tfw youropoor
got my sphinx sdp and 2 mags of speer gold dots right next to me, I think I'll be ok
>>29196107
>MFW .444 Marlin right next to me
>MFW Sig 227 w/surefire 400 iwb sweatpants
>I've got howard leights right next to me
![hqdefault[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Q09qh3S.jpg "hqdefault[1].jpg")
>>29196136
That's respectable, rocks have been used as weapons for as long as we have been around, probably.
>rocks are /k/ as fuck
![R-1790344-1243495856.jpeg[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/q3Lbk0b.jpg "R-1790344-1243495856.jpeg[1].jpg")
>>29202472
>enjoy a home invasion
That's why I like living in America.
If someone broke in I'd bitch slap him and shoot his car with my .38.
>>29203028
Bro to be honest haven't even shot mine yet waiting till the first or so of next month that way I have enough ammo to shoot my scar and 226
>>29196107
I'm at work. Does the 20mm cannon next to me count?
>>29196107
its not a gun but it's something
My building has several vestibules opened only with a badge, my flat's door is "armored" and I live in a nig-free neighborhood.
>>29203314
>Royal kukri
Are you me?
>>29203345
It's actually the 'kukri plus'. The blade is two inches shorter than the royal. I got this cause the royal wasn't eligible for prime ship'n and was more 'spensive.
STRAYA and STUDIO APARTMENT
Machete, pillow case, mop and air freshner
>>29196616
shoot the cat and post pictures
>>29202946
They look really badass, but unfortunately they aren't too practical. Imagine trying to stab someone with a 5 foot spear while in a confined space.
Webley .455 MkI in 2 seconds.
>>29196107
>30 seconds
Welp I'm already dead.
My .303 is out at my hunting cabin right now, but I have two white boxers to entertain my new guest for a while. Assuming he isn't too drunk to help my next door neighbor is a melanin enriched individual with a small arsenal.
H&K P2000 in .40 w/ SureFire x300 and two spare mags, Franchi SAS-12 with the folding stock and seven rounds of low recoil 00 buck in the tube if shit gets really hairy.
Beretta 9000s in .40 for the wife.
I like my chances.
None of my guns are that close to me. But I do have an AV for horse breeding within reach. I'm sure the case would ruin someone's day if I hit them with it.
>>29196107
Czechpoint VZ 58 in the closet across the room and a 1911 to get me there.
Also a Mossberg 930 and Glock 36 if the girlfriend wants to join in.
>>29196107
Well.. Theres a Sig under my pillow, loaded with 9mm hollowpoints and an AR in my closet loaded with M855s...
Been meaning to get a new 12gauge, but waiting on some money.
>>29203853
>>29203853
>cover dindu in flakes of crusted horse semen
>he rethinks his entire life in that instant and turns around and leaves
>>29196107
12ga with 00 buck next to my bed, loaded and ready to go
>>29196107
>about 10 machetes;
>more than 20 knives - bowies, tantos, folders, hunting skinners, throwers, you name it;
>a katana (yeah, I know);
>a baseball bat;
>couple of steel pipes;
>an AK-47 bayonet;
>a traditional recurve bow (40lbs takedown limbs and sport arrows, at least for now);
>and last but not least - me dad's makarov in a drawer in the next room.
>>29203918
I like my chances.
>1/2
My voice.
I have woken up in the middle of the night to intruder(s) searching my house.
When I came to I drousily saw blurry light reflections on the walls from flashlights in another room.
At first I thought it was a thunderstorm but there was no thunder.
Then I heard familiar sound from the kitchen - drawers being opened and such, maybe even whispering, not sure.
The doors between me and them were open and it was really quite.
I knew they would come into the bedroom eventually.
>TBC
>>29203958
I was sleeping in one of the guest beds that night and a stranger would likely not expect that particular room to be a bedroom.
Naturally I didn't want them to get any closer to me, potentially setting up a moment of surprise and panicked reactions.
So I got out of bed as quietly as possible - they stopped for a few second, must've heard something, then continued.
I snuck to the bedroom door and well, I had nothing. Nothing to defend myself, fuck not even a phone by the bed.
Knew I had to do something though, they weren't going to stop searching the place and were about to run into me soon.
>>29203968
>>29203958
>3/3 actually
So I told them - with as much confidence as I could muster at that point, cause my heart was beating like crazy and blood pressure was HIGH, I had to control my breathing to calm down for a second there - to get out, and that there was nothing of value to be had here (which is true), and that I had called the cops (which wasn't true).
And... they ran. Fast. They moved quietly to the door they came in from and really started hauling ass through the garden. I immediately ran into the kitchen where they had been seconds ago and looked out the window. Saw one run the around the house through the garden. It was a summer night and the dude was wearing white (shorts) - as an intruder. Put me off right that moment.
So in the end I got very lucky. The only got a few meters into the house, didn't steal anything, didn't damage the door - actually there were not signs of a break in AT ALL. I upped the security in that section of the house. And no one was shot. Good on me for heaving a deep manly voice I guess. Actually and disturbanc would've led to them fleeing and I know I didn't sound that menacing, cause I was scared. Afterwards I really wish I've had a handgun as a safety net. Or just to point out the fact that I have one in that moment to them and cock it loud enough for them to hear. You know, for added authority. But it's nigh impossible to get one here legally. Also, I sometimes had trouble sleeping for like a year after it happened and occasionally would go an check out sounds when awake at night.
>\blog
>>29203929
>makarov
in the uk you would be a terrorist
Huge ass knife is next to my bed and a pellet rifle is not to far away. Could disable someone with the right pressure and shots.
My 9mm is under my bed.
I guess it'll have to scare them by pointing it in their direction, because I can't see shit without my contacts in...
>>29204000
>not sleeping with your contacts in
>taking them out, ever
this knife a convicted felon gave me.
>>29204011
Ever had one dry out and solder itself to your fucking eyeball?
No thank you.
>>29204022
I kept mine in every single night for, like, ten years. Never had a single problem.
Got LASIK a month ago.
>>29204028
I'd love to get lasik, but back home they would only do one eye for distance and one eye for close-up. That seemed pretty fucking stupid to me.
>>29204037
That is retarded. That's usually only a procedure that they do for people over 50 or thereabouts. Something about natural bifocals, which seems retarded to me because you'll never see evenly.
>>29204042
Right?
That would drive me up the goddamned wall.
>>29202990
>>29203021
>Hog killer
>Pig killer
>Cop killer
Yeah, a 12 ga. / .308 will get the job done. So many uses for such fine calibre.
>>29196107
>*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
>
>Someone just broke into your house.
I don't think so senpai. Are american doors really that flimsy?
>>29202455
autism
>>29196107
AR behind and to the left, and 1911 within arm's reach. Also I'm upstairs, so I'd easily have either one ready.
A bunch of exacto knives, a small block of concrete, an assortment of tools and a 3D printer.
If the door holds for 8 hours I could print a liberator I guess. But since I only got 30 secs I'll throw the concrete block and then dual wield exacto knives.
>>29196107
30 seconds? What kind of cardboard house do you live into?
The last time the local police tried to break thru one of our average metallic doors it has taken them 20 minutes of banging with sledgehammers and rams.
>>29204295
>>29196130
Translate your moonrunes
cz p-01, right next to me with a spare mag close by.
30 seconds, though, that's a bit of time. I have a 12 gauge a few feet in my closest as well.
>>29204306
http://www.beyler.ro/products.html
>>29204349
But...why were the police trying to break in?
>>29196107
>AK with two 30 rounders full of soft points.
>Px4 with some nifty magtech +p hollow points.
>12 gauge and a box of rifled slugs.
>bokken.
>staple gun.
>nugget stock.
>nugget bayonet.
>An unopened can of 54r.
>Archangel nugget, a full 5 round mag, and a bunch of stripper clips.
>A fuckload of cutlery.
>convection oven.
>Scissors.
>spam can opener.
>good sized dowel rod perfect for beating the hell out of someone.
>small folding table.
>shitty kayak paddle.
>bunch of airshit that can work well enough as clubs.
>get fucking amazing strong door
>forget that wall next to door is actually less sturdy than door
>surprise house guest taking a nap in the wife after making new much less impressive door
>>29204382
>small folding table.
>shitty kayak paddle.
so your strategy is to eventually turn the home defense into a wrestling match? Choke slam the bad guy out the window.
A hand grenade.
>>29204373
Druggies dealing bath salts from an apartment at the 4th floor.
>>29204393
I highly doubt that you can break that easily thru a 25cm heavily reinforced concrete or a 35cm mildly reinforced brick wall.
>>29204399
I just need to hire full time announcers and a ref.
>>29204382
Is this you?
>>29204408
So when the home invader kicks down your door, do you have a house-wide PA system that will play his entrance music? Will you rig fog machines near every door in the house?
>>29203986
It seems that recently any white non-muslim brit is a fucking terrorist.
It's kind of sad seeing the once glorious Empire being reduced to this, goddamn it. I hear the country's still thrivingly picturesqe though.
>>29196107
AK47
AR15
M&P
GP100
Mossy 500
.50 cal muzzle loader
my biggest dilemma would be deciding what to grab
Shotgun, Nugget, AK47, various knives, brass knuckles, and my fucked up bat
>>29204404
>not putting your rounds with the bullet pointing backwards the good ol' H&K way
Wtf, dude. It's 2016, get your fucking shit together.
M&P Shield in my nightstand with 147gr Critical Duty
or
Mossberg 500 with 8 Shells of 00 Buck.
Ak
Glock 27 with a 15 round mag full of hollow points
Taurus PT92 with a 17 round mag full of hollow points.
I'd like to think I'd go for the Taurus because it would be a little bit quieter, but I know I'd go for the AK and yell "SHOW ME YOUR WAR FACE!"
>>29202455
Here's your (you)
Judicious application of #4 buckshot
Airshit here.
I think I'm safe bluffing it since there's approximately 5 black people in my town and their salaries are at least double mine. I live right next to a high school full of swag-gangsta faggots that are known to break in and steal iPads and hot-pockets and shit. Autistic fantasy goes as follows:
>BOOM, CRASH
>allah guide me
>don my Shemagh and ATACS-FG pants in under 10 seconds
>grap pic related
>run out into living room, screaming the 7 Russian words I know in rapid succession
>???
>prophet
>>29196107
Obrez'd PTRD-41
>>29205990
>Airshit
>???
>prophet
>ever
LOL, faggot
autistic faggot fantasy indeed.
>>29206642
could work
>>29205990
What if they pull a real gun, anon?
>>29206710
He'll hose them down with his high capacity mags full of 6mm caseless, duh.
>>29196107
Best I could do in 30 sec, forgot my purse in the kitchen.
>>29206710
>be shot
>die
I mean it's not like I'm unaware that I'm gambling my life away into a shiny polymer toy
>>29206745
Forgot pic.
>>29196107
The problem is picking what to put the intruder down with, since almost everything I own is within 30 seconds space. I think grosse messer in one hand, glock 19 in the other.
>>29206809
let's not turn this rape into a murder?
>>29196107
>looks around.
Should be a baseball bat there. Got left out.
Other than that - a stun gun. Two knives. Two pistols. All easily within reach in 30 seconds.
>>29196107
30 sec is enough for me to grab the shotgun and put 2 or even 3 slugs in it, make a 180° turn and have the entrance hallway in sight.
But as a yuropoor I have absolutely no right to do this unless the intruders are armed themselves with firearms.
If they have knives I'll go with a machete, nigger mode.
In any case my weapons will be confiscated and there are 50 % chances that I will be convicted with assault with a weapon.
Self defense is not a right here and judges are totally unaware on how a human can have to defend himself when threaten.
>>29206913
>>29205990
Colossal faggot. I hope you get shot.
>>29206956
I'm sorry anon, you can come live with me in freedom land VT
>>29207172
I cannot go far from my family, also I prefer to stay in this country to try to make it better. I went into weapons only because as a citizen I have the right to have some for shooting sports, I stayed for the fun and the awesome weapon owners community.
I also have a spear and a huge medieval shield so I can block the way and poke some holes into the dindus trying to rob me. This is the fun option.
ARE YOU OF SERIOUS COMRADE
I WILL TAKE MY GLORIOUS RPK AND SHOVE IT INSIDE EVERY CAPITALIST SCUM ASSHOLE AND FIRE THE GLORIOUS 7,62 SO FAR UP HIS ASS HE WILL BE FORGOT TO SAY "SORRY RUSSIAN MAN I'M SO SORRY"
GLORIOUS RIFLE OF KALASH DESIGN
>>29207275
I too am trying to help my country, I hope the hopheads don't force you to go hoplite on their ass.
>>29204482
Imagine the look on Tyrone's face when he realizes the living room he just entered is basically a mini WWE style arena complete with a live "crowd", announcers, and a ref. Smoke machines and light show machines turn on the moment he crosses the threshold and NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA I'M 200% NIGGA starts booming from unseen speakers while the announcers are talking as if this was some well planned out match.
>>29197054
I'm not much into wood personally, but that's a pretty gat anon
>30 seconds
Get ready to meme on him wit my glawk fowtey.
It's actually chambered in 10mm but every glock is a glawk fowtey.
>>29196107
I got a Shashka on my desk
>>29202990
if you successfully HD'd a Lil'Badger you might just be the ultimate warrior.
>>29205990
Funny shit
>>29207541
>File: images.duckduckgo.com.jpg
I don't believe that weapon is yours, anon.
>>29200629
is that a Carhart?
>>29203400
>and air freshner
Well known to be lethal to Aussies
Crossbow with dragon dildo bolts. COME GET SOME
*BOOM BOOM CRASH*
This hacker is going to pirate your guns.
What can you do to stop him?
>>29209317
If I can download the guns and the car afterwards, I'm not going to.
>>29209317
>File
Quickly pirate a bear.
I keep my front door unlocked
But the pit and the retiever will hold him off for a min or two.
Regardless I have these in my room
And yes I would like to use the katana first... But I'm still gonna brandish the Ak till I know they are unarmed
if my dog going apeshit didn't scare him away? probably my coach gun because I care the least about the cops taking it.
>>29196107
If i had less than 30 seconds, i atleast have my shield 9 right by me.
But in less than 30 seconds i can walk into the next rooms, pick up my AR, chamber a round of VMax, and proceed to blow everyone's ear drums out.
>>29196107
Dog-dick shaped dildo.
>>29201815
True Americans always have overwhelming firepower. *salute*
either carbine ar15 or 870
30 seconds?
I can get to anything in 30 seconds
I think you meant 5 seconds
Right now I have 90 rounds next to an AR within arms reach and a loaded mosin on the wall with 4 stripper clips
>>29209251
I mean, I dod grab my canned air, but I guess this anon couldn't find their lighter either.
>>29196107
My cheapie SD40ve, but it goes boom and puts holes in people.
Gonna trade it in on a M&P 40 when I have the money. I already have 200 rounds of Hornady Critical Defense that was costly... so gotta stick with 40.
>a knife
It's inner arms, liver, and neck right?
Gotta make it count.
>>29196107
Within arms reach
1911
357 mag
38 special
Anything bigger requires getting into my safe, but only one in there is condusive to tight quarters work.
>>29210120
Inner thigh, armpit, solar plexus
Neck is too easy to defend. If you get their liver that means they were facing away, you're fucked in court.
>>29196107
Don't even need to aim!!1!
>>29202759
Die a happy man because I am drinking a burger.
anyone notice what a fucking twig the boom boom crash guy is?
>>29210274
Not knowing the difference between the liver and kidneys.
>Don WW2 gas mask
>Grab lighter and aerosols can
>Flank from left
>"MMMMPH MMMMMPH"
>WM1 his ass.
>>29196459
An army of undead you say?
Like, say, an Army of Darkness?
SKS on my left, 2 feet.
M9 on my coffee table, 4 feet.
I'm good
>>29196107
rem870 to my right w/ defense ammo in the saddle.
>>29196107
>What's nearby?
guns
>>29204542
Reddit called,
they want their memes back
>>29196357
But where's the fun in that?
Smith and Wesson 686+
Mosin Nagant
Both within arms reach, can get it in 1 second
Either way there's going to be nothing left of him but I'll go deaf wasting him.
>>29209317
pirate retribution for Rhodesia
>>29196107
I've got an FNP9 and an KM2000, best I can do.
