WHAT DO YOU DO WITH A DRUNKEN SAILOR?
Make him listen to Scottish Pirate Metal.
http://youtu.be/ta-Z_psXODw
Put him in the brig with the captain's daughter
NJP at Captain's Mast, 30/30, reduction in rate, half month pay x 2. Liberty suspended for the command until new Alcohol Training is complete and page 13's signed. Liberty Logs now required for all personnel E-6 and below and curfew in place, no bars past 0000. Random breathalyzers on the quarterdeck at start of business day.
>>28362336
what the fuck
>>28362336
ahh I miss the navy
>>28362336
>30/30, half months pay for 2 months
Ha. Week shit.
I have yet to see ANYONE get less than 45/45 half months pay for 2 months with reduction in rate.
>>28362336
this guy gets it
>>28362292
Are we gonna flog him in front of the mast, or over a barrel?
>>28361449
Those chromed 03's are gay as fuck, they should just use garands, or non blinged out 03's
>>28362336
chief...
>>28362336
>>28362369
>>28362366
We're you guys Marine Corps regs? I got the ol' Ninji punch with 45/45 and a reduction.
such is life in a garrison Marine Corps
>>28361449
....Im not aware the US navy had alcohol rationing in the first place
>>28364049
Suck it up shipmate, the old man is trying to make bird and 2nd fleet will be up his ass if we get another alcohol related incident.
>>28362292
Put him in the scuppers with a hosepipe in him!
>>28361449
How the fuck easy is it to get a NAM?
>>28364185
End of Tour for non-shitbag E-4 and E-5. I got a spot NAM for basically doing something that was high visibility but it was my job.
>>28364124
They can denature industrial alcohol all they want, a sailor will find a way to purify and drink it
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torpedo_juice
>>28364238
...so is that why JFK was sick all the time?
>>28364226
dude it must be different in the marine corps or something. Really not trying to play the whole "up hill both ways" thing but god damn. Not that it matters at all now but it would of been nice to have one
>>28364329
If you wanted medals showering down upon you, you should have joined the Army or the Air Force. Joint commands are like that too if you have a chance of going to one of those.
>>28364351
I was on a half assed one for a few months in Germany, it was mostly just a reason to fuck off and drink though.
They're still giving out the gwat right? I was just saying this kid got a nam before his 90 day mark.
maybe I'm totally wrong and the navy does that differently
>>28361449
throw em in the long boat till he's sober?
Shave his belly with a rusty razor
>>28361449
Send him to congress so he can spend money there?
>>28364238
If by "purify" you meant "have faith in whatever bullshit you did to the alcohol", then yes it was purified.
It still made too many people blind.
Denaturing alcohol is a crime. It's like during prohibition, the police actually DELIBERATELY distributed poisonous booze with the intent to MURDER it's consumers.
Crimes.
Adding copious amounts of capsaicin or something would be MUCH safer, more humanitarian, and hilarious.
Shoot him through the heart with a loaded pistol.
>>28362336
Look as long as no one buddy fucks you won't get fucked buddy.
>>28366752
This guy gets it!
>>28362336
Can someone explain to me these punishments?
>30/30
>page 13's
>Liberty Logs
>no bars past 0000
Depends if it's early in the morning
>>28361713
underrated post
>>28362336
Thanks chief.
Way hey and up she rises.
http://youtubedoubler.com/?video1=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dw_W5BB_hgFY&start1=30&video2=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DEB37CvARO24&start2=&authorName=snoopsagan
>>28362336
What the hell Chief.
>>28367031
Nah, da po-lees dindu nuffin wrong
>>28367483
They cut your pay, which doesn't matter because they feed, clothe, and shelter you.... they limit or forbid shore leave, which again doesn't matter because they cut your pay... they document the fact that you're an asshole while omitting the fact that they are assholes two, in an attempt to make you look bad, which, again, doesn't matter, because sailors have a reputation that sticks harder than fleas anyways... they publicly shame you for being a drunk in front of the crew, which you really don't care about because you know they're all drunks... and, last but not least, they make you pretend to be sober.
>>28367483
>30/30
Refers to number of days in a "punishment" status. In this case, a total of 60 days in some form of restriction. Restriction varies in its suck, but it can usually best be describes as boring and no fun. It's not like you're in the brig, but you have to spend all your free time doing menial work, mustering at all hours of the day, no liberty, have to wear a restriction page so everyone knows your shitbag, etc
>page 13's
Essentially a Page 13, in a punishment use, is a piece of paper you sign that goes in your record. It usually says "If you fuck up this way we're going to fuck you." It essentially removes the "I didn't know!" defense and warns that you're going to get the broom handle if you do that certain thing.
>Liberty Logs
Normally, when you're in your home port at least, you can just walk off the ship when the work is over and go home or to a bar or whatever. Liberty Logs are essentially you telling the command where you're going to be. Being caught doing something other than what you wrote is unlikely, but is just another charge they can throw on you if you fuck up.
>no bars past 0000
Like the tin says, such a rule would mean sailors can't be in bars past midnight. Normally, at my command, this has the addendum "and no drinking" to make the fun stop. Again, people ignore it, but if you're caught fucking up, it's just more ammo they have against you.
>>28367616
Nether did the crim-an-ills
Strange, nobody did nothing wrong.
Nothing to see here.
In the navy, you can sail the seven seas.
In the navy, you can put your mind at ease.
>>28367632
>mfw nobody dindu nuffin wrong, then everyone did everything wrong
Why is the navy so gay?
>>28367659
1000 men leave port in a tiny metal box with limited entertainment. 500 couples come back to port.
I wonder why that is?
>>28367650
The end of the bible pretty much says gods gonna boil the oceans dry, burn the atmosphere away, and make mountains flow like water...
>MFW all the children have to die
>MFW I have no face anymore
>>28367659
On the surface, it's all the gay sex.
But, when you look deeper, you find it's just a huge conglomeration of trolls who have finally achieved their life's goal of being promoted high enough to fuck everyone else.
>>28367585
I wonder if that rumor that they got all the men singing for that game drunk before recording them is true.
>>28367672
strange that sounds kind of like a thermonuclear war, the sun exploding, or really bad climate change.
So how gay does it actually get in the navy? I mean the stories that get posted to /k/ sometimes....
>>28367483
>>28367629
Out of all of these, Liberty Logs sounds the most annoying. That and wearing a restriction page.
>>28367732
Gamma ray burst?
Really, when you put god in the equation, anything could happen. Literal "the sky is falling" stuff.
I'm just a monkey derping around, trying to find my happy place. :/
>>28367606
Watch it Shipmate!
>>28367766
Watch 13:34-14:06
http://youtu.be/X0ttJoFfVNE
Watch that section a few times.
13:34-14:06
>>28361713
Ha,ha. So this is a real thing? It's like Horatio Hornblower on meth.
>>28368078
I always wondered why they never developed 5" and 16" inch shotgun shells for kamikaze defense. Can you imagine an Iowa class letting go with a full broadside of shotgun load at a plane?
>>28362336
You got fucked by your upper enlisted, they could have mitigated that kind of punishment so bad.
I've seen shitbags skate through NJP easier than that.
>>28368207
I wonder that, too.
Tanks have canister shells for anti-personnel.
Something like, a 5 inch shell filled with huge finned flechettes sounds like it would rock at anti air.
>>28361449
Shave his belly with a rusty razor.
>>28367520
>>28368135
I posted >>28361713 because Danny mentioned it on Game Grumps.
>>28364351
This. Got a meritorious unit com from the coast guard while in the Navy because I walked them through some radio troubleshooting. They dialed a wrong number and were patched to my shore station from underway.
>enlisted trash's sole success if the fact that he was part of a government organization
>he did nothing of note after he left
You aren't that guy are you /k/?
>>28368461
Neo /k/ needs to die.
>>28368856
I've been posting on /k/ since like 2008ish
Maybe you're the neo /k/
>>28364157
Let's tuck our collars, shipmate.
>>28367494
/thread
>>28361449
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1PNySIWMrA
https://clyp.it/playlist/nkenjvzq
JERK OFF IN HIS TOWEL.
>>28367650
No you tard.
It's a little ambiguous but you are wrong either way.
if nobody didn't do nuffin wrong then everyone did nuffin wrong.
If on the other hand nobody did do nuffin wrong then that means that everyone did do at least one thing wrong.
>>28361449
PUT HIM IN CHARGE OF AN EXON TANKER
>>28361449
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning
>>28367629
>page 13's
>Essentially a Page 13, in a punishment use, is a piece of paper you sign that goes in your record. It usually says "If you fuck up this way we're going to fuck you." It essentially removes the "I didn't know!" defense and warns that you're going to get the broom handle if you do that certain thing.
That raises a question... What the hell is page 11?
>>28362336
CHIEF
H
I
E
F
fuck his boipussy
>>28361449
STICK HIM IN A ROOM WITH ANOTHER SAILOR!
>>28370548
It's actually 2 worse than a Page 13. For reference, at a Page 10 they lock you in a closet for a few days with nothing but a bottle of Evian, and at Page 7 they begin singeing parts of your scrotum with a waffle iron.
No one has gotten to page 1 yet, and everything past Page 4 is heavily classified.
>>28370548
counseling statement
it's a punishment thing too
>>28370494
KEK
>>28362336
>tfw you got a few days of bitch work and a stern talking to by Chief instead of going to Mast
>tfw you were his retarded drunken children
>tfw crying when he retired
Chief ;_;
>>28370620
That sounds mysterious. It's probably best for mankind that content of page 1 remains a mystery.
>>28370627
>counseling statement
In theory that sounds like they are helping someone... but in military way...
>it's a punishment thing too
The natural outcome of what I said.
>>28368425
>>28368207
because quad mounted machineguns with an AA sight do the job better, faster, and cheaper.
you think a 5" deck gun could track fast enough or elevate high enough to play duckhunt with incoming Jap Zeros?
>>28368207
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Shiki_(anti-aircraft_shell)
>>28362366
>>28370620
>only evian
the horror...the horror...
>>28362369
I got a 2 months half pay when I got njp'd, I also had to pick weeds in front of the chow hall which is insanely embarrassing considering how many people walk in and out of it making fun of you
>>28368207
They have a shotgun type she'll for the 5 inch. It's called KEET if I remember right
>>28362369
We had a guy that got popped fucking a brand new 2nd lt. She got the standard lor, he went from E4 to e1 six months half pay, and 3 months extra duty. Poor fucker. She was hot though.
