How would you go about training a hippo for home defense? They are strong, aggressive, and deadly.
How do we weaponize the hippo? I need one to protect my home.
Pic related. It's hippos killing the child of another one who infringed on their territory.
Id sooner get fucking bears and tigers in my house than a hippo
>>28320939
first you'd have to train it not to fall through the floor into the basement
>>28320970
Who you kidding op lives in a single wide no chance the floor would survive
>>28320970
don't worry, if that floor can hold op it damn can hold a hippo
>>28320939
Is that a water buffalo getting fucking shreked?
This is a serious topic we need to start discussing
>would love to see the look on nignogs face when
>kicks in door
>sounds like no one home
>other nignogs enter home
>door slams and locks
>nignogs start niggering
>all lights flash on
>hippo comes charging around corner, huge spike on forehead and me with glorious nugget on saddle pouches on side of saddle filled with vodka
>GET OUT OF HERE STALKER
>hippo spikes one nig in chest
>nignog 2 pulls out glockenspiel
>FOR THE MOTHERLAND!!!
>Stand on saddle and lunge at nig stabbing him in chest with glorious nugget bayonet
>kick him off bayonet out window
>glorious
>grab vodka and feed body of nignog to hippo
>>28320970
just get your mother to do that, since she is an expert in that subject
>>28321051
>>28320939
That is such a nice shade of red
>>28321050
You aren't funny or creative.
hippo would eat too much food
if someone shoots the hippo now you've got either a dead or a pissed off hippo and even if he kills the bad guy or the bad guy flees the hippo is probably going to start fucking up your house
a) you have a dead hippo, there goes all your money you spent feeding the fucker
b) you have a hippo that just tore up your house, there goes all the money you had him protect
>>28321149
Obviously we would need some hippo plates to protect against gunshots.
Well now I want to start the mounted hippo cavalry
>>28320939
How about a boar?
