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You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
to impress a real life operator with your abilities or combat knowledge.
What do you do? Show them your moves, /k/.
Sucking your own dick doesn't work.
I beer bonged 3 fosters at once one time after eating Burger King and threw up.
Nunchuck routine.
I've been practicing in case I meet SGM Vining.
>>28066428
I can field strip a Mosin in under 5 minutes and I can also run for awhile without stopping for another cigerette.
Am I in?
>>28066428
I'm a qualified helmsman for all Nimitz class carriers in the Navy , I can also do some sea based navigation
Tactical roll with my katana. Followed by a 30 second Kenjutsu routine.
Fuck yeah.
I always make the tactica decision to poop before getting into the shower
That guy died unimpressed. That's amazing.
I'd try and open with the Aristocrats joke. If needed, I can use my own feces as a prop.
>>28066428
>Sucking your own dick doesn't work.
I thought that's what I was supposed to do when you asked me to show off my abilities and combat knowledge?
>>28066428
I can make the shit you need to operate.
did he shave his eyebrows off?
Black Hawk Down acted out with interpretive dance
I'll play this on my boombox during my routine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJxrX42WcjQ
>>28066524
All of the hair on his body ran away.
If there is no hair to raise, then no one can tell how afraid you are. He has taken "hiding your power level" to a new extreme
>>28066428
If i stretch out my hammies and have someone to help carefully push my head down i can suck my own di...
Oh, ok, sorry.
>>28066573
>>28066592
dude literally has no eyebrows
is that some sort of tactical thing?
I'd operate their dick with my ass, if you know what I mean. And if you don't, I mean I'd let them fuck me in the ass.
i shave my armpits daily, it makes me aerodynamic when i fight
I'm always paranoid so I have good threat perception.
>>28066573
Ahhhh.....that's better. Thanks man!
>>28066615
Cutting hair and keeping it in regs is a bitch to some. Makes more sense to just get rid of it, my hair used to be similar but I never shaved my brows off.
>>28066615
high speed low drag, perhaps?
>>28066701
Its helps him swooce right in.
>>28066707
Tom Hanks??
>>28066754
Brendan Fraser
>>28066428
I think he'd be more impressed if I was just honest and said I knew almost nothing but wanted to learn
Master Sergent saves his head but you are too scared to look at him,
>When you do you ask yourself,
>"Did that mother fucker shave his brows off too?"
>He looks at you
>You do a 1000 yard stare in fear of not getting your ass chewed
>>28066769
What are you, a gay?
Demonstrate your sword skills.
>>28066428
Implying I can impress a Space Marine.
>>28066716
Let's plot a course, intercourse!
>>28066781
Imagine sitting on a subway with that guy just staring blankly through you for the entire ride.
>>28066793
Is that Brandon, The Last Samurai of the Tokugawa?
>>28066716
like a fish
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4ODBYvmag4
Tell him I had 2 years of marine jrotc in highschool
Bo staff demo with Mortal Kombat cassette tape playing in the background
www.youtube.com/watch?v=egne2ZCMM_0
>>28066793
I gotta admit, that guys parents have a really cozy looking house.
>>28066428
Not very likely they're going to be impressed.
If they are, you're probably in deep shit.
tell him i got kicked out marine bootcamp for smoking meth
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WP4k4tOsZD8
Show him how to keep his 1911 running
>>28066464
Get on my tier, I run while smoking lucky strikes.
>>28067367
Are you saying one should instead shove themselves in their own asshole instead of sucking their own dick?
tell me about the operator why does he shave the eyebrows
I'm in sniper section, haven't gotten my B4 status though. Going to school in a few months.
>>28067511
You don't get to bring, eyebrows.
>>28067559
(INSERT_BIG_GUY)
>>28066491
>not just pooping in the shower
1/10 would not operate with
This is my exact routine I have prepared for such a moment.
https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1449094475880.webm
They can't help but be impressed by my combat prowess.
>>28066696
If you shave your eyebrows off you'll have to give yourself some vaseline ones if you're sweating. It's surprising how much you miss them when they're gone
>>28067813
What if you cover your entire body in vaseline, m8?
>>28066473
That video stabilizing tech is pretty cool. It made this one zebra mating video I have so much better.
>>28066428
>once called in a sitrep to Batt while driving
>lead truck in a security patrol in N.Iraq
>was also pissing into a bottle at the same time
>in full kit, dick flap in all
>truck crew didn't even notice not two feet away
>not one droplet on my pants when I dismount
>>28067823
Then you become a slick operator boyo
>>28066500
>99 out of 100 nobles were impressed
>>28067970
Underrated post.
Also best game. I love you anon.
>>28067855
Why I love 4Chan, the post.
>>28066428
Show them I can competently do IA drills.
Soldier shit is pretty fucking basic.
![IMAG1038[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/LY1iF9b.jpg "IMAG1038[1].jpg")
Dustoff Crewdog reporting.
>>28066500
He looks like that because pictures are fucking stupid. It has no reflection on who he was
Does firing a rocket launcher indoors count?
I spent over $3000 on my AR15 and over $7000 on my kit and gear
I am well qualified.
>>28066428
There is literally no way I can impress him.
Unless he wants to see me hit a fifty straight out of the bong.
I'd probably just buy him a beer and talk to him like a normal human being. He's probably tired of all that "OMG UR A LEET OPERATOR TELL ME A STORY" bullshit.
>>28070431
>because pictures are fucking stupid
>>28066428
I am also an Operator
I operate an """"armoured""" G-Wagen
>>28067855
can you post it?
i love zebras, they can produce more milliliters of sperm at a time than any other land mammal on earth
Imagine a marine scout sniper crawling threw the forest to shoot you. But instead of shooting you he takes a shit in your back yard without you noticing and then disapears.
>>28070765
>shit in your bedroom overnight while you slept
>shit in your car
>you visit mom and there's shit on her porch
are you justified in shooting this person?no justice no peace
>>28070709
From his point of view they probably were. 'Hey we gotta take death pictures tomorrow, show up in blues.' You gonna pop on a fucking smile for that shit?
>>28066428
I hip fired a mark19 once.
>>28066428
I can get dubs whenever I want
>>28070753
Lol, I'm sure I'd get b& for it.
>>28066428
I can run at speed almost completely silent.
Tell him about the spider i Removed with a WASR.
Am i operator enough?
>>28066428
I show him my skills with the katana.
>>28066524
>>28066592
>>28066615
>>28066654
>>28067559
>>28067511
>>28067813
probably got it burned out by fire or explosion...
sometimes i'm amazed how actually stupid most of you fuckers are.
>>28071216
How was it?
Show my Steam account with 1500h of Counter-Strike : D
The last o group I gave.
Did not use the word "and"
I used twelve different colours of string and forty green plastic army men.
My pointer was a wood shafted arrow with a reproduction bodkin point.
I had passport photo sized prints of the four high values to hand out.
I had the FAC on a push bike just so I could use the push bike mounted infantry symbol on the map.
>>28066428
Calliou the operator
>>28066428
Чтo eбaть ты пpocтo чepтoвcки гoвopилa oбo мнe, мaлeнькaя cyкa? Я тeбe зкaжy, я зaкoнчил вepшинy мoeгo клacca в BДB, и я пpинимaл yчacтиe в мнoгoчиcлeнных ceкpeтных peйдoв нa Aль-Кaидoй, и y мeня ecть бoлee 300 пoдтвepждeнных yбийcтв. Я тpeниpoвaлcя в пapижcкoм вoйны, и я cвepхy cнaйпep в цeлых poccийcких вoopyжeнных cил. Bы ничтo для мeня, нo тoлькo дpyгaя цeль. Я пpoтpитe тeбe нaхpeн c тoчнocтью, пoдoбных кoтopым никoгдa нe видeли paньшe нa этoй Зeмлe, зaпoмнитe мoи чepтoвы cлoвa. Bы дyмaeтe, чтo вы мoжeтe yйти c тoгo, чтo дepьмo для мeня чepeз Интepнeт? Пoдyмaйтe eщe paз, yблюдoк. Кaк мы гoвopим Я кoнтaктиpyю мoй ceкpeтный ceть шпиoнoв пo вceй Poccии, и вaш IP-тpaccиpyeтcя пpямo ceйчac, тaк чтo вaм лyчшe пoдгoтoвитьcя к штopмy, кoзy. Штopм, кoтopый cтиpaeт жaлкий нeбoльшoe вeщь ты нaзывaeш твoя жизнь. Tы нaхoдишьcя чepтoвcки мepтвых, мaлыш. Я мoгy быть гдe yгoднo, в любoe вpeмя, и я мoгy yбить тeбя в бoлee ceмиcoт cпocoбaми, и этo тoлькo гoлыми pyкaми.
>>28073655
Я нe тoлькo oбyчeн пpиeмaм pyкoпaшнoгo бoя, нo y мeня ecть дocтyп кo вceй apceнaлe Boздyшнo-дecaнтныe вoйcкa, и я бyдy иcпoльзoвaть eгo в пoлнoй мepe, чтoбы вытepeть зaдницy жaлкий c лицa кoнтинeнтa, нeбoльшoe дepьмa. Ecли бы тoлькo ты мoг знaть, чтo нeчecтивый вoзмeздиe вaш мaлeнький "yмный" кoммeнтapий был гoтoв oбpyшить тeбe, мoжeт быть, ты бы пpoвeли cвoй гpeбaный язык. Ho ты нe мoг, ты нe cдeлaл, и тeпepь ты плaтишь цeнy, ты идиoт пpoклятый. Я дepьмo яpocть вce нaд тoбoйи ты тoнyть в нeм. Tы нaхoдишьcя чepтoвcки мepтв, дeткa.
>>28071844
>probably got it burned out by fire or explosion...
>sometimes i'm amazed how actually stupid most of you fuckers are.
Yeah because people get that close to explosions all the time in the military without any problems.
We discuss various forms of "retro ARs" and have a small chuckle over how both the XM16E1 and M16A1 are also dubbed the Colt 603. Then I would serenade him with classical guitar playing. We would each drink a hardy lager of his choosing and I would send him away with a friendly wave.
I stubbed my toe in the middle of the night and broke my tinkie toe nail but I did not wake up my neighbors when I started swearing loudly.
>>28073661
Пpoигpaл c пoдпиндoхи.
>>28066428
Impressing myself? Thats going to be tough... I hold myself to such high standards....
>>28066428
Be an upstanding citizen.
>>28066428
do a double backflip.
>>28066428
I dunno. I could do a conscious intubation but I think it might just making him mad.
>>28066428
>)
>>28066500
why don't some militry guys have no eyebrows?
picture related some soilder who went crazy and killed every one
>>28070431
>>28066428
he's so operator he's eye brows got scared and ran away
also agent 47
>>28067579
>>28067559
>>28066428
I run an 18:00 while dipping, smoking a cigarette, and getting my combat jack on without anybody else noticing.
>>28066428
tell him boot camp stories while asking how many people has he killed.
>>28076007
>Conscious Intubation
Jesus christ.
The real question is
>Can you do a conscious DIGITAL (i.e. no scope, just your fingers) intubation?
>>28067506
No...b-but now I wish I hhh-had...
I own fourteen busou shinkis and three guns
>>28066428
>Impress a ZOGbot
No
>>28066428
You don't do it at all. Anyone who "has to impress" has already lost.
>>28067014
It's a trailer. My grandpa had the same mobile home. It's okay, old as balls.
If hes a Marine or Navy i'll ask him to find a partner so I can fuck him up in spades, no Marine/Sailor ever turns down a game of spades.
