Questions for all the Cops on /k/
Im trying to become a cop. Kinda just wanna fight crime and help people.
The problem is, I used to be a POS
>Drugs
>Theft
>Guns
So should I lie on the questionaire for the poly? Should I even bother going forward? I haven't done anything illegal in years and am actually a good person now.
Should you lie on a lie detector test?
As in lie.....while attached to a machine attempting to guage your truthfullness.....
....which is a prerequisite for a job....
....which requires truthful testimony in court...
Yes anon absolutely lie.
>>28050551
Kill yourself degenerate
>>28050551
>I used to be a POS
>Shitposting on a weapons board about lying on a poly test
>used to be
>>28050551
That's a little vague, what level of crime are we talking about here?
Are you college educated?
>>28050580
I WAS a degenerate. No longer so.
15 years in the Army fixed that.
>>28050568
So if lying is out....what is a deal breaker? DESU im not comfortable lying, but can rationalize it for this job.
>>28050646
>lieing p.o.s.
If he gets past the polygraph, he'll be a good cop.
>>28050654
Stole a pair of paintings from a bar while drunk.
Illegally carried my gun
Smoked pot in HS and a few times after
Did coke a few times
Did LSD once in HS
Army Veteran, no college.
>>28050662
These days I only lie to protect my family.
>Yes babe, that tasted good
>>28050665
Are you a white guy?
Do you have a criminal record?
>>28050665
You're not that much of a scumbag. Protip: polygraphs only work when you think that they do. If you stay nice and anxious and stressed, consistently, the entire test, they won't notice a difference in equilibrium. For the most part they rely on the fact that you'll crack before even getting near the machine.
>>28050690
Yes
>>28050695
One arrest. Nolle Prosiqui
>>28050868
Thanks. Hopefully they wont think Im that bad either. Im just concerned Id be wasting my time. I make about $75k doing security as it is so this would be a pay cut...but I need a career
>>28050551
You honestly dont think they do a background check on you? They will know youre lying just by reading you arrest record.
>>28050551
Don't lie. I know people who took the poly test and who are cops now and they've said to just be honest. If you haven't done stuff in years it's more likely you'll be let in for being honest and you have absolutely no chance if you're caught lying.
>>28050665
You'll be fine. That's not really that bad.
>>28051181
I was arrested once, and never prosecuted....I have no intention of lying about that. Its all the stuff I didnt get caught for.
But after speaking to cop buddies at work, it seems they are more concerned with if I lied about anything.
So the only lie I will tell is that I never did LSD (its a deal breaker). Hopefully all the other shit distracts them from that
You can help people without being a cop if they don't accept you. You can work for security companies such as ADT or whatever. Police work isn't what you think. It's a lot of showing up after the crime and filing reports. If you want to be preventative, you could become an instructor for CCW classes or self defense classes
>>28050551
Did you get convicted of any of that? If so, then they will probably find out anyway. If not, then it never even happened.
>>28050568
What will your results show if you lie on the preliminary battery of questions?
>>28051967
In Iraq I learned I have a knack for finding bad guys. Ive been on the wrong side of the law, but found that its usually just shitty people on that side. Cops can be dicks, but most are bro's till you act like adick to them first. Working with a bunchof retired cops has given me the idea I woukd make a good one, the kind regular people like coming across, the kind that doesnt use authority as an ego boost.
>>28051983
No convictions. I dont want to lie.
Thanks for the comments. I have decided I will go forward and not lie (except about LSD). If they accept me, cool. If not, oh well, I have a job and might not accept anyway.
>>28050551
Why don't you do some research on polygraph machines mate. They are founded on a basis of pseudo science, and the majority of their usefulness is to be used as the "bad cop" in order for the interrogator to illicit additional information or a confession from the subject. Honest guys have lost their jobs or been denied applications purely because they were nervous and gave "suspicious" results on the poly (based on the interrogator's interpretation). Read some strategies on how to deal with them and you should give the readings you want to give, just don't confess to shit under pressure because "the machine's giving me an indication here..?"
>>28050665
If your name is James Boyd, you're fucked.
If not, be completely honest. If you lie on the application or test, they will find out, and you will never get a job as a cop.
I know because one of the guys I went to the academy with (in FL you can go to the academy before being hired) lied on his about drinking underage, and they kicked him out of the interview. He never even made it to the lie detector.
Even with a spotty track record, as long as you don't have any convictions relating to dishonestly, like fraud or perjury, your chances aren't terrible.
Just tell them up front, and explain that your time in the mil straightened you out.
Also, don't worry about polygraphs, worry about a CVSA (computerized voice stress analysis).
I don't know of a single dept that still uses polygraphs where I live. The CVSA focuses on the involuntary change in pitch in your voice when you lie. You can't audibly hear it, but they use a special microphone that picks up on that shit.
Unless you're the 1 in 100,000 people whose voice doesn't modulate when you lie.
>>28051056
Also, how is your current job not career material? Is it contract work with a limited timeframe?
>>28052782
Private security...though I am armed and well paid its a dead end. Plus no retirement.
Also I am stressed the fuck out all the time because my site manager is a toxic leader.
That and our client might say "fuck you" in two years when the contract is up for renewal. Though the company would put me at a different site, none of the other places pay 80k a year. With cop work, I will take a pay cut, but in the long run its better and more stable.
>>28050665
LEO here, there's really no need to lie. I'm a Texasfag and most departments other than DPS don't care about petty theft and doing drugs in high school. If they give a shit about things you did as a kid then go somewhere else.
Your application will ask if you've stolen stuff. Just put yes and list a few things you feel badish about. As long as you've been truthful in your application you don't need to lie on the polygraph.
Also, drug experience is essentially what most cops use to identify the stuff on the street.
I.E synthetic marijuana v.s real marijuana
Powdered cocaine v.s powdered heroin.
Don't sweat it, if we turned down every Joe that smoked weed in high school we wouldn't have any cops at all.
>>28051967
Pretty much this.
>>28053736
I'm this guy, and though a lot of this work is report taking, you'll get to help people.
When you get the call for a major accident, baby fell in the pool, or daddy is beating the shit out of mommy, you'll be glad you picked this job. You'll learn to find the guys who genuinely deserve to be locked up and be the one to make sure it happens. Feels good.
>>28050551
>cops
>fighting crime
>helping people
Come on now
>>28050551
I've legit had someone tell me (it was on the UT Austin Open DILDO carry page, so go figure) that carrying a gun to protect MYSELF is, and a direct quote here, "100% WACKO."
On topic, polygraphs are hardly accurate.
>>28053736
>>28053767
>you can still be a LEO if you were arrested for drugs
What
No whey
>>28050568
lie detectors are bullshit you know
>>28050568
You realize the polygraph is 100% (not 99%, not 99.99%, ONE HUNDRED OUT OF ONE HUNDRED) operator-determinant right? A polygraph is second only to crystal balls, seances, and palm readings in pure horseshit. They are specifically used to keep out undesirables, people who can't be denied for legal or justifiable reasons.
Source: This is my job. All results are decided ahead of time.
Hey /k/, I want to get paid to shoot black kids. What city can I move to and become a cop in that will get me the greatest opportunity for this? Mind you I already live in st Louis so I'm looking for a more international perspective.
