aliums
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You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
You are currently reading a thread in /k/ - Weapons
m curious how /k/ would deal with aliums, besides the obvious of shooting them.
What would you do if you saw pic related? What gun would you choose?
Anyone with experience in the subject? I want to track down and kill the xeno menace.
>>23270568
Bumb
>>23270568
why are aliums always nekkid
I'd think if you went to another planet with a potentially hazardous environment you wouldn't step out of your spaceship with your dick swaying in the wind
>>23270634
To fugg biches
I dunno, man. Maybe they dont need clothes?
also, discussion about Dulce base and underground anti alien warfare? Probably complete bullshit, but hey, aliums
http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/branton/esp_dulcebook14.htm
>>23270634
True. But there have been stories of them visiting for ages. Maybe they have been able to study us, and the environment.
Or, my theory, most aliens we see are genetically engineered for Earthbound purposes by a race that prefers to stay out of the way.
>>23270685
Or, my theory, most aliens we see are genetically engineered for Earthbound purposes by a race that prefers to stay out of the way.
This is most likely answer. People have said there are tall greys and short greys, and the short ones are the ones who do the dirty work.
But back on topic, how would you oper8 on an alien?
Bump
anyone here have experience with aliens? I need to know how to kill them
>>23270707
Oh. Right. How to operate on them.
Knowing nothing of how their bodies are, I'd rather go big, or go home.
10mm or big bore revolvers.
Big game rifles like a .375 H&H, or .416 Rigby.
A 6.5 Grendel may be ideal if you want to go semi auto, in my opinion. Of all the rounds like that (6.8, .50 Beowulf, etc) I like the 6.5 the best.
>>23270568
Why do ayy-lmaos have a almost if not completely identical musculoskeletal system to people
For something that evolved on another fucking planet you'd think they'd be at least somewhat different
>>23270765
fuck it in the butthole
>>23270773
For the same reason creature with different musculoskeletal systems arent as advanced as us. You dont see fish shitposting on /b/ do you? Maybe there are space octopusses but they dont want to go to earth?
I mean, the human body is very good at what it does. Can eat most everything, strong and durable, high endureance, smart, good vision, and great tool manipulation abilities
Besides, grey aliens may very well be break off civiliazations.
>>23270568
>What would you do
If I was alone I woild be so frozen and stunned with fear Ide just stand their staring at it until it went away.
If i was around a bunch of betas and some females lusting for high test ide grab a gun and use it.
>>23270770
Yeah, thats the thing. We dont know how durable they are or are not.
I feel like something in 7.62x39 or 308 would be good, and 10mm because fuck yeah 10mm
They might be less strong because they live in space so that could very well be overkill. I mean, people kill mooses with 10mm
>>23270707
Grey? Bowie knife surprise because I want to hear their terror in my mind while the life drains out of it. Then yell for Boudreaux to start the soup stock because them fuckers are delicious.
Big power-armor assault cyber aliums? 20 mm bolt action with passive night scope. HE ammo if available.
Any mass alium interaction that goes sour? Start with psyops and media manipulation. Primarily alium rape in whatever holes they have or we've made in them or fake it with graphics.
>draw CC
>plug alien
>wrap in plastic
>freeze
>sell to highest bidder
>never work again
>>23270634
The theory is they're actually in space suits, their body is actually beneath that.
>>23270568
AYY LMAO
Y
Y
L
M
A
O
>>23270765
if you stick your finger in their bellybuttons they die. this is true for most creatures of the universe except for humans and skeletons. this is because humans are just skeletons in their developmental stages.
>>23270782
>>23270815
Id probably scream and shit myself and then try to beat it so I could go get a better weapon. I also carry a pocket knife so I could stab it probably. If It was far away or inna UFO I would run away, because if you let your self get caught youre fucked. But If I was armed id chase down a UFO
Also rape it. Whos gonna abduct a crazed rapist with a gun?
>>23270840
10/10
>>23270829
well
their space suits look like shit and are completely and utterly uncool
>put 100 round chinese drum into mini draco
>dump steel core 7.62 through the wall next to screen door
>find out I killed the neighbor's kid trying to play a prank
>put fake alien statue in basement and laugh about it
>>23270821
If they had been more adapted to space travel in 0-G, then pretty much anything would work.
But why would they be able to move around terrestrially, if that were the case? It'd be incredibly awkward for them to do so.
Or maybe they have a high pressure atmosphere and gravity. Then you'd be able to get through them with only the biggest guns.
It really depends on everything.
Like I said, I bet the aliens we see would be fairly like us, only because they were made that way by other aliens.
>>23270879
>Like I said, I bet the aliens we see would be fairly like us, only because they were made that way by other aliens.
Likely this, now we need to find their leaders
Two /k/ autists misidentify each other at night. One is looking for evidence of ayy lmao. The other is out to stop the skinwalker threat. Both are sure that the other is his quarry. What are they carrying and what happens?
>>23270829
no you retard, the 'bodies' are just surrogate type things, like biological puppets
>>23270568
I'd whip my dick out and start tugging on it furiously till I'm hard then run after it.
>>23270666
Nice trips, Satan.
>>23270862
If that thing started doing loud deep grow/groans I would tactically shit my pants.
>>23270568
Step one : Strip compleatly nude
Step two: Anoint self with oils, get completely smeared with oil.
Step three: Offer prayers and go to meet alium
Step four: Chase it down and wrestle
Step five: Offer it up as a sacrifice and strangle it to death. If choking dos not work, Impale it and remove the limbs
>>23270899
Nuggets, both rapidly fire all 5 rounds and then fumble with the stripper clips, out of breath from screaming at one another in badly pronounced russian. Despite now knowing that the other is not an ayylien or a skinwalker, they still fight. They attempt a bayonet charge but only manage to trip and fall down a hill. As they are both horribly out of shape, they cannot get up and then are eaten by a grizzly bear
the end
>>23270823
>HE
>on armor
Why?
>>23270919
>strangle it to death.
ayy le mao
>>23270930
For the softer exposed parts. HEAP or sabotted flèchette if available. And thermobarics. And moar alium rape.
I will travel to ufo hotspots and hunt aliens, whos in?
>>23270973
>And moar alium rape.
not rape but related
I fly my ship up in the air sometimes
Singing hey oh
Ayy Lmao
![brainproblems[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/FP0DlDK.png "brainproblems[1].png")
Am I the only one who currently/used to have a crippling phobia of greys? When I was younger, up until about 4 years ago, the sight of a grey in like a book or on TV would just make my body shutdown. I'd freeze, goosebumps all over, drop whatever I was holding. The deepest sense of dread and revulsion I've ever experienced would take hold of me and I would be shaken for the rest of the day. I used to sleep as far into the corner of my room as possible, back to the wall, facing the window. I was like this between the ages of about 8 til 15.
Maybe I was abducted or something. Now though, I just get mad and violent when I see one. Maybe as a coping method. Pic related.
> most posts are about raping aliens or lubing up, hope alien browse this thread
This is why humans shouldn't be allowed to have interstellar space travel, I mean what the fuck /k/?
>>23271013
Nope, I am terrified of them, hence this thread. i have to kill them all. I feel it.
I actually freaked my mom out alot because I talked about owl people alot who would visit me. I also was afraid of owls and other birds for a while. If you dont know owls are apparently related to abduction because they look similiar to greys or something. But yeah, im more scared of greys than humans where I live, which is in the middle of nowhere.
>>23271035
>terrified grey detected
Were coming for your ass boy
>>23271044
As soon as a read the word "owl" in your post I got a bit of that old feeling. Now I'm cold. That's creepy shit, man.
God dammit. Honestly, I keep my HD guns loaded not just for human intruders.
>>23271062
>Honestly, I keep my HD guns loaded not just for human intruders
same
>TFW 16 and sleeping with SKS beside bed
Im confident I could kick a greys ass though, but I get freaked out by them
>>23271035
Fuck you, alien scum. I do mean fuck you, in every hole.
>love, /d/
>>23271073
I like to think so too, but if they really exist, they can just use they paralysis mind control on you or whatever. It's probably futile to even think about trying.
Hell, they can even make you forget. You've probably been visited a number of times.
>>23271044
ITT compromised, damaged abductees.
Any species that has managed to solve the problem of interstellar travel are at levels far beyond what the european gunboats had over african native tribes.
We should practically be begging them not to wipe us out
>>23271087
>It's probably futile to even think about trying.
I dont care, death before dishonor and all that
>You've probably been visited a number of times.
n-no anon plz
>>23271098
>TFW
But Im not really sure if I have been or not, i mightve been. Or I mightve been a fucked up kid. Well, i was a fucked up kid. but I still mightve been abducted
>>23271074
I still hope that aliens are much sexier than >>23270944
>>23271131
>tfw no qt asari gf
>>23271142
>asari
Fucking plebiean. Might as well bone a human, you fucking pervert.
Now Krogan, that's where it's at.
>>23271044
Owl people? Something about that really twisted my stomach. I would be fucking terrified if my child told me about that.
>>23270568
Aliens aren't the enemy man. I'd chill with it and pass around the peace pipe.
>>23271110
Guaranteed abductee. How's that anal probe feelin?
>>23271131
> implying she isn't hot and likes choking.
>>23271212
Nigger, it gets worse. My mom apparently had the same thing happen to her, and also I was almost born into being the messiah of a small cult in rural virginia.
>>23270634
>why are aliums always nekkid
then they're clearly not an intelligent alien species. completely naked, they could just be the mid-level predator of their world, not so unlike a wolf or bear; except hairless bipeds instead of quadruped mammal.
the same could be said for a naked human of course, except even then the human would try to find something local to form into clothing, if they found themselves naked there. (and any kind of self-alteration for a specific apperance (tattoos) is "obviously intelligent" territory as well)
> But back on topic, how would you oper8 on an alien?
Never assume it sees the world like you do, it could have natural night /low light, UV, or thermal vision. So obviously, do the best to avoid direct visual contact while retaining LOS to the alien.
Don't try to mislead it away from your position with a cliche "thrown object makes distracting noise" -- if you make no noise and are not seen, you in fact do not exist as far as your target is concerned.
Don't antagonize it, or goad it into a fight. It could pull some nasty bullshit out of nowhere and fry you for all you know. If it's obviously hostile, such as covered in blood, then either escape or, If armed:
Visually confirm by observational duration that target is in fact an xray ET, and not a civilian, k9, or hairless-cat type furry /BDSM gimp suit.
Absolutely NO warning shots, lethal takedown only, you gotta hit this shit with 100% effort. Don't half-ass it.
Physically speaking, "head shots" rather than center-mass, simply because the torso may not have the same organs in the same places as a human; you could at least damage one of the few visually accessable organs, the eyes.
>>23270765
>killing alien homies
>2015
This is how you opr8 on alums
>>23271243
Also she almost had a hysterectomy because of medical reasons, but had her decision to try and have me helped by a random gypsy fortune teller from like romania or somewhere in easter europe tell her that she "Shouldnt let them take it"
>>23271243
Give us details, nigger, don't just leave it there.
>>23271215
Peace but preparedness: lube, blades, stabbing with bullets if bong rips fail.
>>23271276
>>23271273
She was asleep in college and her room mate walked in on some thing tall and thing that was female and was birdlike standing over her and petting her.
She was deeply involved in Pagan mysticism and accidentally formed a cult. Twice. She was with my father, and was going to raise me as a baby with the cult, who decided I was top babby because I survived after a miscarriage of one before me and the doctor saying it was impossible for her to have a baby.
Oh and I apparently at first thought they were friendly, but then got deathly afraid of them
Also I have a lot of nightmares involving aliens and space in general
fuck dude Im freaking out right now.
>>23271314
Even if you're bullshitting, I'll bite. What did her roommate do after seeing this?
>>23271351
Those remind me of the Predators.
>>23271344
Scream and run away because holy shit what the fuck is that thing. Apparently he (maybe a she? fuck I dont know anymore) went to go talk to a friend about what the fuck was that and was told that this happened fairly often.
>>23271351
w-what is that. are those owl people?
>>23271314
Hoo mutha fucker
>>23271314
Where you at?
>>23271376
Also, what's the whole deal with these cults?
Can you describe what they believed?
>>23271397
Not that guy but cults, grey, owls and the dead seem to go together.
It turns out aliens are furries.
What do you do /k/?
>>23271314
> accidentally formed a cult.
> Twice
as interesting as it is disturbing... how the fuck does this even happen once, let alone twice
was the response "oh shit i did it again" and "why are people around me so fucking craaaazy"
>>23270568
12 Gauge.
>>23271397
Apparently the first one was in highschool while she was dating some crazy kid, and they ended up doing satanic rituals and such.
Second one was I believe some sort of Pagan Mysticism. That one was bigger. Magic kinda stuff ya know? I dont know exactly what they believed in, though.
>>23271395
East coast
Anyways I actually have to go do something, be back 30 minutes to an hour if thread still up
>>23271418
I don't doubt it. They're all pretty eerie stuff that people sometimes seem to tie into the whole occult thing.
>>23271451
>was the response "oh shit i did it again" and "why are people around me so fucking craaaazy"
pretty much yeah.
>>23271432
Sit back and laugh as they rid the world of the fucking autists stumbling all over them.
>>23271471
>>was the response "oh shit i did it again"
> pretty much yeah.
if you can't find the humor in this part of your own life, please learn to... because it's fucking hilarious.
>>23270568
Scenario:
Alien saucers have begun abducting the world's wealthy elite, and you are now being paid to design a system to protect them from abduction.
The alien ships fly at about 3,000MPH and can turn on a dime. They also have a barrier that detonates warheads that stray within a couple hundred meters of their hull. These combined abilities have made missiles an unreliable means of taking them out.
Hard Mode: Your clients will pay extra if they can live their normal lives(walk around on the surface) with your solution.
>>23270568
legitimately thinking about it, I'd die in most cases.
Really think about it: interstellar aliens have tech that's at the bare minimum 60-100 years in advance to our own. So I could possibly expect to see a creature capable of:
>gen 10 night vision equivalent...and god knows what other spectra it can see in
>optical/multispectral metamaterials -- ayylmao is invisible to everything now...and it's not halo tier wavy lines...it's invisible.
>god knows what his weapons and armour are like. maybe he has a gamma ray projected radiation gun that can walking-ghost my ass in seconds.
and this is just considering possible tech...we know NOTHING about their biology. for all we know, the creature could have 100% systemic redundancy -- i.e. no organs, but rather its whole body's tissue network could literally perform all functions of conventional organs in a decentralised fasion...meaning % of tissue destroyed > aiming for a particular spot.
If I were to engage vid related, based on looks, it appears unarmoured, so I'd go with a weapon that displaces the max amount of material -- 12g 00 buck. I'd aim for the head, as it appears to be the largest mass on this being...
>>23271513
Haha yeah it kinda is.
>>23270891
>mfw their leader is a durandal-like hyper intellegent AI literally using a starship as it's body
>mfw the greys are the s'pht
>>23271246
this is a good assessment
>Intelligent life forms exist in our galaxy
>They are advanced enough to travel the incredibly vast distances of space, and arrive at their destinations alive
>They invest the resources to travel to a planet housing intelligent life, whose inhabitants are just beginning to explore their solar system
>They get naked and sneakily run around at night in order to spook the more isolated individuals on the planet.
Intelligent life surely exists somewhere out in space, but you can bet your ass they're not here yet. If they ever do show up, you can bet no bumbling government conspiracy could hide their presence. You could also bet that their plans would not be in our best interests.
>>23271142
>>23271225
Well, I like my Xenos... smoother
If you know what I mean
>>23271648
>implying that if humans could travel the stars, resources be damned, and found a world that supported human life unprotected, yet housed a sapient species, we wouldn't cruise around naked spooking their yokel equivalents
Aliens. So like us.
>>23271648
>Intelligent life forms exist in our galaxy
>They are advanced enough to travel the incredibly vast distances of space, and arrive at their destinations alive
>They invest the resources to travel to a planet housing intelligent life, whose inhabitants are just beginning to explore their solar system
>they use remote-op drones that have been specifically crafted for maximum mobility on the planet based on its gravity and atmospheric pressure
>they operate these drones on the surface to gather scientific data about the first exoplanet they've encountered up close.
Playing Alien: Isolation made me realize that the only fictional alien I fear is the xenomorph. Big head/tiny body, reptilians, body snatchers... all bitches. Fucking eight-foot murderbug with acid blood and facerape babies? We are all fucked.
mfw I was playing at 0300 and that big fucker bumrushed the locker I was hiding in, ripped the door off and slaughtered me like a cowering bitch.
>>23271733
Xenomorphs are by far my favorite alien species.
>>23271658
Yeah, that totally doesn't qualify as furry shit.
>>23271759
You need to play that game. It's like a direct video game reproduction of the first movie. Fucking creepy as shit.
Oh, and you can't kill the xeno. Can't even scratch it. It just goes from "rape" to "rape more.... rape lots more". Beating the living fuck out of people Freeman-style with a wrench is glorious, though. You also get some crafting stuff so you can make smokebombs and whatnot.
Easy 8.5/10
>>23271811
well, bloodsuckers are technically altered humans, so...no...no it doesn't.
>>23271648
>>They get naked and sneakily run around at night in order to spook the more isolated individuals on the planet.
What, you think we wouldnt do the same
>>23271823
I've only really played the AvP games. I'll check it out.
>>23271861
AVP2? The one by Sierra that came out forever ago?
>>23271455
>Anyways I actually have to go do something, be back 30 minutes to an hour if thread still up
Im back
>>23271733
I think the reason so many are scared is that its more like a home invasion/nowhere is safe coupled with fear of the unknown and having things shoved up yer ass
>>23270978
westmoreland pa: 396
motherfucker
I'd likely feel the fear run down my spine and begin to paralyze me. I'd then remember my training. I'd clear my mind of everything but the plan.
If weapons were by my side I'd grab them, but I wouldn't turn away to do so. I'd make a direct charge at the being, growling and baring my teeth. If I could make it past all the technological bullshit from the movies I'd pounce the mother fucker and go feral on it, bite chunks out from it, shove my hands into its eyes and try to pull them apart. I wouldn't stop even after the thing died. I'd keep going, ripping every section of its body apart with my teeth and hands, eating hunks of it occasionally regardless of whether it was edible.
>>23271658
l-lewd
>>23271878
I've meant to, but I've really only played much of AvP 2010. I heard it's shit compared to those, though.
>>23270978
most of those places are fairly close to some type of nuclear power/ defense facilities
i cant seem to figure the new hampshire and illinois sightings though
>>23271938
>and that, bleepnorp, is why we send the drones down to visit the humans
Also, I feel like you would enjoy some HFY stories
http://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/2flz4o/oc_humans_dont_make_good_pets_i/
http://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/2it6y2/beast_chapter_i/
>INB4 Le plebbit :^
yeah I know, but its great for being able to track longer stories over time because it never gets deleted.
just read em
Also for lewd tier http://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/27ujw5/oc_pancakes_nsfw/
>>23270634
They are suits.
>>23272039
Rail gun.
>>23270634
>>23270666
Maybe that thick rubbery 'skin' is their clothes
>>23271243
Hold on OP have you ever watched The Fourth Kind? Right before the person is abducted they see a white owl near their window at/around 3:33 am.
>>23272214
nope, i havent. But lots of people have reported owls and greys being linked. apparently the big head, black eyes, and color scheme is similiar enough. Something to do with memory alteration
>>23272266
It's a pretty good movie if you want a scare of the unknown watch it.
>>23270568
Does everyone miss the obvious?
Why do aliums look kinda like small big-headed humans?
Why do they abduct us and do freaky-deaky experiments?
Why do they seek out hillbillies and drunks?
BECAUSE THEY ARE US.
They know all about us. They are from the future.
The human race is dying in their time, and they need older, hardier DNA to reconstitute themselves.
> Hence the morphology
> Hence the abductions
> Hence the freaky-deaky stuff
Just kill them like you would any commie, or share your hentai with them, whatever.
>>23272074
Mind. Blown. Been studying space travel for years, this is truly insightful. The other side of this is that any beings from larger worlds when they finally do space flight will have some really interesting technology.
>>23272045
What movie is this? Can't find the source for this.
>>23271432
Acquire every alien STD and STI to help advance medical science.
>>23272074
This is why KSP has a babby system of relatively small planets. There's a mod for a true-scale Earth-like starting planet and it's a completely different, masochistic ballgame.
>>23272353
Gotta catch'em all!
>>23270568
I'd tape a flashlight to my rifle, stuff my pockets with bullets and my loaded H&R, punch myself in the nose and cover my face with blood, then run out in flip-flops, cargo shorts, and a "i'm calling the shots" jack daniels shirt yelling "GET THE FUCK OFF MY PLANET"
>>23272383
>it's a completely different, masochistic ballgame.
yeah RSS is pretty hardcore. Shit, even playing with FAR and deadly rentry makes it harder by alot
>>23272406
FAR actually makes it easier in many ways, giving some thought to your aerodynamics gives you rockets much more efficient than they would be by default, then you end up deadly re-entry to bring the balance back and soon enough everything is spiraling out of control.
>>23272448
I just installed DR and still trying to make landers work. Jeb isnt coming back from duna, it seems
>>23272460
Also, Ive got like 4 people stranded on the mun. Still a scrub and having some issues with craters
this would be me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWqI0U3pBdA
>>23271811
She doesn't have fur. And she isn't anthromorphed from an animal. She is her very own creature like 2D girls
>>23272485
>2011+3
>he can't even do Mun and return
Nigga collect yourself, that's a disgrace.
>>23272045
I think they are drones or bio-mechanical constructs which happen to be inhabited by the being's consciousness. They would be the result of the technological singularity of their society.
My other theory is that the galaxy we are in is full of complex life (in some cases space faring). Much of the life is terraformed worlds of successful species and most of those worlds are around dwarf stars.
My other theory is that contact with advanced races and speed of human improvement is stifled by our communication methods. Radio waves are idiotic for distances measured in parsecs. I think that some type of quantum communication must exist and that its frame work is a remnant of the big bang, waiting to be understood and technologically/biologically integrated into our species. The internet and other communication systems are represent the subconscious longing for inter-connectivity with one another. Our species has sadly had to make due with work-arounds while some other species may have evolved this naturally. The collective subconscious is the extent of this effect in human biology.
You don't kill aliums, they are immortal. Lifespan and consciousness transference are technological problems to solve.
>>23272518
I-Im sorry anon. Ive done it before a couple times but I rand out of fuel the first time, and the second time I landed in the dark, and then fell down a crater.
>>23272522
>You don't kill aliums, they are immortal. Lifespan and consciousness transference are technological problems to solve.
>Lifespan and consciousness transference are technological problems to solve.
>consciousness transference
Give one alien PTSD: all aliens get PTSD.
>>23272336
Fire in the Sky, son.
>>23272533
Well then get yourself a lander with a crew cabin and enough fuel to grab them all and get back. No kerbal left behind.
>>23272569
Fuck one alien you're a rapist
Fuck them all and you're a god
>>23272587
Da, I am doing this. I sent a rover to get them out of the crater.
I spend more time doing stupid than playin the actual game in KSP
>>23272587
>not putting a kerbal, isolated without a ship in orbit around every object in the solar system
>>23270568
so fake it hurts
