Demons have started swarming your city!
You only have five minutes to prepare your defense or your offense. What do?
Grab my rifle, some ammo, food, water, a sleeping bag, and a jerry can. Jump in my side by side and get the fuck out of dodge.
I ain't fightin no demons.
>>30157594
>5 minutes
That's not good at all. I'd probably do my best to retreat while attempting to identify the demons based on my years of wasted studies on the occult and roleplaying.
The existence of demons would be kind of neat, since it opens the possibility of the divine and/or magic. Also, I'd have no idea how vulnerable they are to conventional arms. If they're like, honest to goodness brimstone demons that can survive in lava conditions, bullets aren't going to do shit, and I don't have bombs.
>>30157594
If demons manifest in a physical form on Earth, wouldn't they have to abide by the laws of physics? That is to say, would they not be vulnerable to conventional munitions?
>>30158043
Not necessarily. The laws of physics still permit things like elephants/rhinos/big ass bears. Small arms fire isn't going to do shit to a bear or an elephant skull.
A sufficiently dense enough demon covered in thick bone plates and leathery skin could still very much exist without defying the laws of physics and ignore most guns as a result.
>>30157594
>What do?
turn off the computer
>>30158110
That makes sense. Even in the latest Doom imps can take 5 shots of .50 BMG to the chest no problem
>>30157594
>Call pastor
>Ask to bless bullets and guns
>Go over to him / have him come over
>Have guns / bullets blessed
>Kill demons
RIP and TEAR.
Make friends with them by introducing them to online porn and Amazon prime, and lead them on a fight against my enemies
>>30157594
I'll just blast a recording I have of the exorcism from the Rituale Romanum and kick back and enjoy a sip cold peach tea while the exorcism takes care of itself.
>>30158110
Eskimos kill bears with .22s and niggers kill elephants with 7.62x39.
It has nothing to do with skulls and everything to do with shot placement.
of course, demons don't have to have their organs in the same place as you or i, so that brings up something.
Candy.
Welp, time to give my soul.
Call in an artillery bombardment directly upon my position when the daemons begin their approach.
For the Emperor!
>>30157594
Probably piss my pants before being eaten alive
Throw on my 12ga chest rig, grab my 12ga auto and remove doot
>>30157594
Shoot them at their face
>grab pistol belt
>go innawoods
In all seriousness though, i have a shitload of occult stuff saved on a thumb drive. I'd love an opportunity to study what's bullshit and whats' not. because if demons do invade, that opens up a whole new realm of study. I think it'd be great to see if i can bless/ enchant my guns to do crazy shit.
Not to mention it'd bring an opportunity to call Crowley a faggot as he rots in hell.
>>30157594
> scream "HAIL SATAN!!!!!"
> sacrifice the nearest person
> draw pentagram on my chest in blood
> locate succubus, live out the rest of eternity having insane demon sex
>>30157594
FUCKING DEMONS
>>30157594
>GRAB SHOTGUN
>GRAB PCP
>GO F A S T
>RIP
>AND
>TEAR
>>30158828
>call Crowley a faggot
You are one edgy little dweeb
>>30158020
>since it opens the possibility of the divine...
This nigga gets it. Grab rifle, ammo, food, and water, then start shrieking prayers to Sigmar while marching toward said demons with likeminded individuals.
>>30158420
>>30158110
>>30158043
I assume they in our relm they follow some of our rules and mortal, but they tethered to theirs and fueled by eldritch unknown energy which may make them resilient.
But this is probably the best tip to anything.
Shoot at it until it's dead.
It would help if anyone was half the guy doomguy is. I doubt I can punch a guys head clean off. Holy shit!
>>30159041
If we get invaded by demons I will take all the steroids there is. I will fuck these demons in half.
>>30159041
That is not a picture I wanted...
>>30157594
Double barrel fun time?
>>30159060
Why don't you just be a hell knight?
>>30159080
BECAUSE FUCKIN HUMANITY DONT TAKE NO SHIT
>>30159002
What? does edgy mean nothing anymore?
fuck off to /x/ faggot.
>>30159093
>posts a guy being manipulated into thinking he's controlling his own fate
>>30159041
Would doomguy dicking cute jinx from crazy?
Also I wonder how many will 'human traitors'. I'm sure demons will try to persuade the weak.
>>30159041
nothing bullets cannot cure
>>30157594
Kill myself and join their ranks.
>>30159272
I don't give a shit. He's got the biggest dick I have ever seen when it comes to extermination with prejudice.
>>30159272
>implying
Fuck you, he just got off the boat for the foreseeable future.
He has the whole world ahead of him.
>>30157594
lock down my house and sharpen my crucifix. mount it onto the bayonet lug of my mauser with some scrap wood and jury rigging
start making my way to my church
>>30157594
type
iddqd
idspispopd
and
idkfa
>>30159402
Off the boat and right into hiatus I think
>>30159514
Traps know their shit! I'm sticking to this one when shit hits the fan!
Swiss bayonets are holy relics, right? Infused with a neutrality that banishes the forces of heaven and hell? So I'll see what about a foot of high quality Swiss steel does to a demon's chest cavity.
>>30159629
You also need swiss armour, then!
>>30159625
that's pic is not me and im not a trap
>yet
but thx
>>30159629
>>30159653
And swiss cheese.
>>30159657
Dat Gondola tho.
Jokes on you guys, these demons are muslim
Crosses and Christian blessings have no effect
>tfw you wish you didn't scare away the mosque next door
>run to gun shop down the street
>grab that kickass benelli M4 he can't fuckng sell
>all the fucking buckshot
>load some flechette rounds just in case
>grab my .40 CZ
>grab all my fucking +p rounds
>run to the church two houses down from me
>holy water, fucking lots of it
>have guns blessed in the name of the father, the son, and the holy spirit
>grab my silver cross necklace
>pray
>still die because overweight lmao
>>30157594
sounds vaguely familiar
>>30158504
Preach tea
>>30159783
forgot the vid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usouR9WV9OE
>>30159765
>Islam is literally pre Protestant Christianity in almost every way except for not believing in the divinity of Christ.
Looks Russia will be the only nation to survive this.
So I'm the only one raping them to death/submission? I feel so lonely.
>>30159514
nice jacket fampai where did you get it from?
PCP
BUCKSHOT
MORE BUCKSHOT
BONER PILLS
SUMMER SAUSAGE
VODKA
MORE BONER PILLS
RUN, KILL, FUCK DRINK UNTIL I DIE!
>>30159921
>summer sausage
I like you...
>>30159829
>tfw you will never own an AK blessed by a russian priest
I don't know why but that sounds awesome as fuck.
>>30159311
Maybe ghost but just say some words and lit candle or use fire. Burn house or person.
I mean if a thing lives on our plane then enough force of some kind will effect it, bullets should solve any thing eventually.
>>30159829
What about Buddhism and Zoroastrians?
>>30158554
>Eskimos kill bears with .22's
No we don't. 45 works usually
>>30160183
Do they regularly bless their guns?
Do they even have the concept of hell that relates to the Christian idea of it?
Because if these are Abrahamic demons, it's pretty safe to say who was right.
>>30160205
You don't.
All three times I've gone hunting in Alaska, a different guide each time. they each said they've taken bear with .22lr
of course, they could be bull shiting, but that doesn't erase a record holding bear being taken down by a little eskimo woman with a .22
>>30160239
I guess they can, don't think they do right now
Zoro has a concept of evil and good being. Angels and demons.
>>30158020
This
>>30157594
Ave Imperator
>>30158828
>TFW your gun shoots shurikens and lightening
>grab my belphegor shirt
>put on some lame ass face paint so I can look like a Norwegian black metal band member
>start head banging to some rotting Christ
>demons enter my household
>show them my brutal guitar solos
>scream "Ave Satana!"
>we form a metal band and shred together while demons fuck up my neighbors with their Notw bumper stickers
>have some satanic priests bless my guitar/guns
>apocalypse is way better than the ensuing gunpocalypse here in commiefornia
>out shopping today 2 hours from my house and arsenal
>In the Mall of America
>Already surrounded by darkie demons
>Only have my CZ with a 14+1 loading and a spare 16 round mag.
I guess get on the free way and start driving as fast as I fucking can with my gf back up north.
If we couldn't do that, hole up somewhere high and safe and hope no Cacodemons come flying up.
>>30157594
> grab Double Barreled Shotgun
> grab 200 rounds
> get soundblaster
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wy9r2qeouiQ&index=158
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_o5j9srb40
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnLAC5AJPuM&list=PLIB5sLoDj1dr2zh8i1Apq8tcZUCyJw0fa&index=13
Put Seven Spanish Angels by Willie Nelson on repeat, full volume.
get out all my liquor
put a bullet for each of us in my pockets
dump all mags and ammo in the living room
make barracades with appliances
make salt circle around us, liquor, and ammo
make salt circle around barricade
gf and I put on ear pro and night vision
rifles out, infrared flashlights
cry
make last stand
>>30160465
Would 'post-apocalyptic/our possibly last chance' sex like put you on the sin radar?
>>30160534
>Carpenter Brut
yesssss
>>30160354
>Be PDF trooper, defending Hive from daemons.
>Entire regiment is wiped out, only you and 8 other guys holed up near the breach in the Hive's walls.
>Entire Hive is surrounded by the gibbering horde
>Pass out remaining grenades and lasgun power packs, prepare to face the madness one final time
>All of a sudden hear bolter fire outside, it's the Space Marines!
>Not just any ordinary Space Marines either, you and your comrades watch in awe as a single platoon of Space Marines from an unrecognizable chapter, clad in extremely ornate silver armor, drive the entire daemonic army back and seal their warp-portal with a vicious combination of impossibly powerful weapons and psychic abilities.
>With the breach sealed, the Hive is saved
>As the Marines return to their ships, run up to one thank him and the emperor for saving our lives
>"Don't mention it citizen"
>"One more thing, technically our chapter doesn't exist and for some reason we can't have the word getting out, so we're going to have to nuke your hive from orbit. Your sacrifice is appreciated, I understand your frustration".
Such is life in the grimly dark grim darkness.
holy water
i'm going to bless my outside faucets and hose demons.
>>30159666
I don't believe you. This post is obviously demonic
If I shot both shells at the same time in my old double-barrel, would it fuck up my shoulder? I have always wanted to try it and this thread reminded me about it.
>>30157594
melt and cast my silver neckchain asap, and look for a priest to give them benediction of fury
>>30160818
>implying you wouldn't be exterminated for such close exposure to warp energy
>>30157594
Pull my only government favors and contact this man. He should know how to handle it.
>>30160283
>>30160205
Don't know about no bear, but i've seen 250lbs boars taken down with a supressed .22lr
>>30159783
>>30159827
"Don't be Jeffery Dahmer! Bin that power armor!"
Also, how good was that game?
>>30160869
>Grey Knights about to exterminate you to keep their identity hidden
>As the ship's captain's finger hovers over the launch key, a ship from the Ecclesiarchy drops out of warp
>Can't let you do that Captain, WE have to exterminate this hide to prevent warp-taint.
>>30160904
>Gray Knights and Inquisitors fight over who gets to purge the guardsmen
>>30157594
>You only have five minutes to prepare your defense or your offense. What do?
1. I start my Amon Amarth playlist playing in iTunes
2. Paint/draw crosses over every door and window, as well as put salt on every windowsill and along all the walls
3. Acquire pagan cross pendant and apply to my person
4. Acquire weaponry from the same room
5. Rock out with my cock out doing the Emperor's work
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnilK7ZRZB8
I will bayonet me a fucking demon with my nugget. It will happen.
>>30157594
>what do
RIP AND TEAR
>>30158641
On a side note, fuck the cacodemons in Doom 4.
Fuck their fat ugly bodies, their disgusting mouth, their stupid dangly arms, their horrible fucking gurgling noises , and FUCK the way they actually try to fucking bite you in close quarters.
Nothing makes me more fucking furious than Doom 4 Cacodemons.
I don't even give them time anymore, it's either instant BFG or Chainsaw, absolutely 0 motherfucking exceptions .
>>30157594
Watch out ground, I'm coming through.>>30157989
>>30161381
>This anon is properly channeling Doomguy
>>30159666
>666
BACK TO HELL FOUL DEMON
>>30160354
>venerates the God Emperor of Mankind
>posts a picture of sanguinius
HERESY!!!!
>>30161975
>the Emperor's most favored son
>Heresy
The book Armageddon? in the Salvation War series deals with demons invading earth. Big fuckers that need big rounds to take down. 5.56 and 9mm are innefective in taking them down quick enough.
Fun series.
>>30162164
>Misattributing the name of our emperor to an icon of his son
>obvoisly the work of foolish chaos agents trying to gain our trust
purge urself desu
>>30162211
>Big fuckers that need big rounds to take down.
How big?
Easy, use AKs blessed by a priest
>>30162256
Smaller demons from 6-12 ft tall. Then the Beasts of the Apocalypse being 200 ft tall.
>>30161381
I heard in beta they shot psi-tractor beam attack with their eye
>>30157989
sensible anon will be the first to die.
As for me? I'll just set up alarm for T - 20, dust off the good ole' Praetor suit, and stock up on .50 FMJ and shotgun shells. ATF did not approve SOT3, so no rockets or BFG.
>>30162256
>75 caliber explosive rounds
Is good start
>>30157594
I've only got two magazines worth of 7.62x39, and two mags of 9mm Luger, and a mag of 9x18.
I could kill some shit, but I wouldn't hold out very long...
>>30160239
>>30160239
In buddhism any lower lifeform or higher lifeform is still you on the eternal chain of becoming. You are everything there ever was and everything that ever will be you just only experience it one at a time.
>>30162478
chain/wheel
the buddhists try to"escape" the wheel of reincarnation by achieving "Nirvana" but nirvana actually means when you discover there is no you to escape the wheel of becoming and then you're enlightened and no longer suffering
>>30162256
.50 Beowulf and .458 Winchester became standard issue.
>>30160875
truly a demon slayer
>>30157594
I'd cover my fists in holy water and spin around really fast, arms stretched out to either side
>>30160818
More like
>succesfully win back world with horrendous casualties
>without being regarded as the heroes you are you're hunted down and killed one by one like some sort of heretic
The book "Flesh and Iron" depicts this pretty well
grab my bible and my shotgun
>>30157594
My guns and ammo are all already blessed.
>>30159827
i swear to god if i see one more kid walk through a warzone with getting his head blown off i'm going to scream.
>>30160283
AK fag here, 22lr will take down a bear, brown, black or grizzly. But there's a catch, only way to do that is to get them in the ear into the brain. their skulls and skin are super fucking thick that any medium caliber probably won't stop them with 1 shot. Good ol 30-06 will though
>>30165292
in fairness every time they don't do this to the survivors, demons explode out of the survivors assholes and suddenly Chaos
>Grab kukri and BK9
>drive to base
>arm up with m9 and available long arm
>wait for further instructions and Intel from watch commander
>pray to God JGSDF has their shit together and ships in port have weapons systems online
>>30159772
>demons being hurt by catholic holy water or blessings
the catholic church is a demonic cult. that's like showing communists a picture of marx and expecting them to melt
>>30165446
That sounds like it'd make for a pretty badass movie.
>>30160155
there are orthodox churches in many north american cities
if you talk to a few priests I bet you could find one to bless your AK
>>30160980
>pagan cross
do you mean the celtic cross?
>>30158554
Not that it matters, but she was Cree IIRC. She was hunting birds with a friend and they spotted the bear. They hid in a pile of brush and she shot it behind the ear as it walked by. The first shot paralyzed the bear and she had to shoot it half a dozen more times in the back of the skull. So the story goes.
When I was growing up, my family owned a cabin next to the guy that took that photo, who was a pretty exceptional person in his own right.
http://www.thecanadianencyclopedia.ca/en/article/bruno-engler/
>>30158420
The codex just says .50 FMJ. I think it's some other lighter future caliber based on its performance against possessed. I don't care if they're undead, they should be ripped in two if it was BMG. Unless we're talking argent energy shenanigans in which case, fuck it.
The same ammo is used by the chaingun. That one fires 15mm tungsten rounds at 200k psi though. Maybe the ammo counter is just using a common pool of propellant & matter, creating ammo on the fly? Or maybe id just didn't care.
Anyways, I pick gauss gun because it's not a firearm. Get a priest to bless it, then Siege Mode all the way!
>>30159765
But anon they don't explode on death
>>30160890
Disappointing. It had an awesome buildup, then you're basically playing blah Diablo in 3D with guns. The random level generator reuses a lot of assets and the NPC audio is the same repeated quips.
>>30157594
Grab my shotgun. . . wait I one have 2 boxes of buckshot. . .grab my pistol. . . 150 rounds total. . .uhh where did I put my 22. . .12000 rounds hoarded. . .better start loading mags.
