>>2410697
There's already an anime thread so you will get yelled at for not posting in there.
But here goes with a critique:
There is wrinkling of the paper and leftover grey from the level adjustment. You should ink your drawings to make the black and whites crisp.
The pencil lines have chickenscratch. They should be smooth strokes.
The perspective is all wrong on the computer desk and monitor and the edges are not straight. Use a ruler and put perspective lines to help keep them nice.
The face has no structure. It looks like you just stamped out the features where you knew they would go in the one angle instead of building the head. Try going back and doing Loomis blook heads to get a sense of construction.
The lines are irregular in thickness. You started to bold in the lines of the head in the first panel but not the second.
The anatomy is wrong in some parts. The girl in the doorway has a stiff pose and her limbs and hands are sloppy. You obviously hid the hand of the girl in the first panel, but its under her keyboard which makes no sense.
There is inconsistent shading and highlights. The primary light sources should be the doorway and computer screen, but there is very little shading other than the cast shadow in the first panel.
Hope that helps and I'd like to see a revision later.

Dunno if Splatoon counts as anime, but I think you're right, there.

Thank you so much for your feedback, it's greatly appreciated. I'm reworking the picture now based on your advice.

>>2410762
Good to hear.

- I dont understand whats going on because I don't see what's on the screen, is this elephant porn? I can't tell.
- perspective is non existant (but in your case its more like all the objects are curvy for some reason, so you don't necessary need to learn perspective but rather how to draw straight objects)
- hand of the door is weird
- hand on the mouse wtf is happening, its non existant
- dont sign the drawing like that its so ugly and cringe (unless you are 12 and less, then it can pass for cute)
- Use Caps instead of small letter for the text and work on your typo, this looks so amateur


Ok now for the composition you should darker the whole picture so the first thing that pop is the screen lighting her face and her friend opening the door, it would make everything much dramatical and interesting. Just get more serious overall, it really looks like you did that fast and didnt think about it, I mean what is this anyway? What is this suppose to mean? Good luck & stop being a lazy bitch.