My mind is fucked. I've given up on my goal of working as a comic/storyboard artist because it's not a realistic ambition and I can no longer bring myself to put effort into something I know I will fail at. The problem is my brain refuses to get out of artist mode so even though I quit drawing a year ago it has been absorbing inspiration and has been doing mental studies on its own to keep its skills up.
It feels like my head is going to explode. Would taking Adderall give me the focus to put my inhibitions aside and throw myself into what my subconscious mind wants?
Adderall's great buddy. But I think you're kinda being overly dramatic.
How old are you? It's not a bad idea to give up on a pro art career, but why not just do art for fun? You're completely done?
>>2568388
>adderall
>not PCP
>>2568388
Take this idiotic garbage to /b/.
Adderall can mess with your creativity, it puts you into a focus and doesn't really let your mind wander. If you want to get shit done and not sleep, maybe consider it.
It sounds like you need to get a real job, to be honest. "artist mode" is fine, but you have to be grounded in reality. Get a job, make your mom happy, practice art on your free time, and try to get into the art business again after a few years.
If your ambitions from early on were comic/storyboard are, they're practically destined to be slashed at first. Take it slow, be diligent, and you will get there, but, to reiterate, probably not without having a functional work life outside of art for now.
>>2568415
I'm 26.
The problem with doing art for fun is I'm not good, so it's not really fun. And if I was good I could probably get paid for it. Ultimately my dream is to enjoy making art, getting paid to do it just makes sense from an economy of time POV. In my ideal life I would be living on a boat in Costa Rica publishing my own books online and covering my expenses with commissioned work and local sales. That seems far off.
But paid or not, I face the same obstacle which is being shit.
>>2568438
Getting a real job is a whole other can of worms. Right now I'm operating under a "life isn't worth it so I might as well kill myself" mindset. The thing that could make life worth it is getting good.
At this point my mind has done enough wandering, I need to focus and get down to business. Two years ago I would draw three hours a day, five days a week, nothing but figure sketching. I made huge gains. When I tried to add more things to my schedule my progress dropped. I want to get back into that original pattern but for whatever reason the drive isn't there.
>>2568469
You only ever need enough money that money doesn't matter. So get a normal job if you have to. But don't let it stop you from doing whats actually important.
>>2568469
>Right now I'm operating under a "life isn't worth it so I might as well kill myself" mindset
You have way bigger problems then getting good or becoming a storyboard artist. You needa get your mindset right dude.
If getting good will fix that mindset then make it happen. Get off /ic/ and do something
>>2568469
>Right now I'm operating under a "life isn't worth it so I might as well kill myself" mindset
You're gonna make it
>>2568388
You give up too soon. The storyboarding field is FULL of job opportunities for headstrong artists. Just email all the companies you can find, especially in So. Cal.
>>2568469
Alright, I'll give you two different pieces of advice because you won't be realistic with my first.
The first is, straighten your emotions out. I know you think dedicating your effort to a craft is going to solve an "I want to die" mindset, but it won't, especially because you won't make it right away, again, probably not for years to come. Find a way to come to terms with whatever weird attachment you have with the idea of not working, and overcome that first, so you can put yourself into a decent, stable, comfortable position. Take is slow, take it easy, take life with an open mind and heart, and ignore Adderall and all of that.
But you're going to be stubborn and use your feelings as an excuse to not tackle real problems, so I'd say, sure. If you've set yourself on the idea of mastering art because it's all you see is worth it, then sure, experiment with Adderall. Maybe it will help you grind, and it will help you stick to your goals. You're a dumbass, and sound deluded, but I still hope you make it. Now get back to work on that art, if you're so sure you can handle your ambitions like that.
>>2568469
>I want to make an omelette, but I don't want to crack any eggs.
>>2568469
>"life isn't worth it so I might as well kill myself"
Know that. Get help, find someone who can cheer you up. I'm getting over it, first step took an acid to be taken
I had same problem, just (judging by what you wrote) in much worse edittion.
The #1 reason i wouldn't take aderal or ritallin is that these type of meds are stimulants which means you get addicted to them. And believe me you dont want to get addicted to that shit.
I will offer you what will help you 1000%, IF and only IF you keep on practicing it. And that is meditation.
Meditations helped millions, it helped me (100% more than stimulans or antidepresants) and it can help you too. But only if you will constantly practiced it.
Google for "mindfulness meditation", get a book like "The power of now",... and then practice, practice, practice.
Meditation is STRONG tool. It is EASY to learn, but hard to commit to it and do it every single fucking day.
BUUUUT if you will do it constantly, you will notice benefits soon.
Good luck
Pic. Related 10 min sketch to kill some time
>>2568388
I'm not going to throw other suggestions at you, but regarding medication as someone with a prescription, here's what I can tell you:
Adderall and to a greater extent Ritalin have some strong side effects. If you're lucky, they won't hit that hard, but they can ruin your ability to sleep, kill your appetite and make you stop eating, and generally exhaust you. Sure, you'll focus, but you may not have the energy to use that focus for long.
If you really genuinely think you could be helped by the stuff, see a professional. If you're a student, most colleges have free counseling services. Take advantage of it. Don't go in asking for drugs, because if you actually need them you'll be less likely to get them. Just tell them how you're feeling, answer their questions, and do the therapy. They'll know if you need them or not. I'd say especially go so an expert if you're having suicidal thoughts. You may have something else making it harder to focus—people have this idea in their head that clinical depression makes people sad, but really it's more like crippling apathy or lack of energy (which in turn lead to being sad all the time).
Also, don't be afraid of a day job. Yeah, you'll have less time for art, but financial stability is important. If you really care about art, you'll keep practicing and working at it. I'm not great, either, and I work a full time job, but I still practice every day. You can do it, too.
Art is a hard career to get into. Any long term career is hard to get into. Get through the present before focusing to hard on the future.
