I'm an Amerifat, and never took a proper European History course.
Red-pill me on the Thirty Year's War.
some people got thrown out of a window
then half of germany died
>>938471
And all was well in the world.
>>938422
It lasted 30 years
Pope throws a hissy fit peasants are not funding the building of St. Peters Cathedral, then sends his cuck emperor to kill the peasants.
Fast forward one century later, and most German nobles and other European monarchs have had enough of the Popes interventionism and tyranny over the common folk and decide to stand up to him. Another cuck emperor comes to the rescue of the Whore of Babylon we now call the "Catholic Church", and decides that best way to show the principles of Christianity is through the Inquisition burning women alive and by slaughtering innocent peasants *again*.
>>938490
t. the eternal protestant
Causee by the eternal Czech
I don't think there are much red pilling to be done here. The history is told pretty straight. Probably some retards will come with some "the Jews did it!", but they are just retards
>>938516
By red-pill, I really just meant teach me about it as I don't know much aside from "it happened."
>protestant Czechs chimp out against catholic Habsburgs
>protestant Germans and Swedes join the war
>headfucked protestant Hungarians chimp out too
>catholic France helps the protestants because they hate Habsburg hegemony
>eternal Anglo funds everyone
>>938528
Read Peter H. Wilson: Europe's Tragedy. Best single book chronifle of the conflict.
>>938533
This is what is was looking for, thanks m80
HABSBURGS GET OUT REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>ywn go full Wallenstein/Big Boss during the TYW
>>938523
Well it's quite the clusterfuck, but I'll see what I can do.
Emperor Matthias had set up succession for himself by getting Ferdinand elected to the thrones of Hungary and Bohemia in the early 1600s. Problem was, Ferdinand was hardcore Catholic who very much seemed set to put harsh policies in place against the Protestants. In particular protestants were afraid that Ferdinand would undo the gains they had made at the Peace of Augsburg in 1555 and from Emperor Rudolph's Letter of Majesty in 1609.
In 1618, Bohemian protestants finally had enough, revolting in the typical Czech manner of throwing people out of a window. The next year, Matthias died, making Frederick the emperor. The Bohemians seized upon this by calling Frederick V of the Palatinate to be their king and applying to be in the Protestant Union. The Palatinate accepted, drawing them into the war, while the protestant regions of Upper and Lower Austria also revolted due to the new Emperor's harsh anti-protestant stance.
The "H""R""E" being the clusterfuck that it was, the Emperor's response ended up being fairly disorganized. Habsburg Spain offered their help, mobilizing their army in Flanders against Palatinate territories on the Main. Meanwhile, the Catholic Liga (counterpart to the Protestant Union) mobilized in support of the Emperor, led by Bavaria, whose forces were led by Tilly. Meanwhile, the Protestants were far less unified, thanks to the Habsburgs making public letters from Bohemian rebels. The Bohemians had simultaneously requested multiple different leaders to take the throne, and, with those letters made public, they lost a lot of support. Thus, the Habsburgs were able to get Saxony - a protestant elector - on their side as well.
>cont
>>938422
Luther did it and it caused more german deaths than ww2.
>>939187
The end result of all of this was two major European powers (Spain and Austria) supported by two electors (Bavaria and Saxony) going up against a far from unified Bohemia and the Palatinate, whose lands were spread across Germany. The result wasn't too surprising.
Johann Georg of Saxony invaded from the north while Tilly led Liga/Imperial forces in the south, crushing the revolts in Austria. Meanwhile, Spinola led Spanish forces against the Lower Palatinate, tying up the Protestant Union and preventing them from supporting the Bohemians. In 1620, Tilly chased down the Bohemian forces, ultimately meeting them on the field of battle at White Mountain on the road to Prague. There, they were decisively defeated, effectively spelling the end for the Bohemian revolt.
Following the crushing of these revolts, Ferdinand began confiscating Protestant properties. A policy of re-Catholicization began, taking lands of those who revolted (mostly Protestants) and redistributing them to Imperial loyalists (mostly Catholics). This ended up causing more problems than it solved, as it undid much of the previous agreements made over the past century to preserve the peace among religious tensions.
All this time, the Palatinate was holding out better. The Upper Palatinate had been given to Catholic Bavaria and the Palatinate's electorate position had been revoked and rewarded to Bavaria for their support in the war. At the same time, the Protestant Union was dissolved and Frederick V of the Palatinate declared an outlaw. However, two major forces led by Count Mansfeld and Duke Christian of Brunswick were doing reasonably well in the Lower Palatinate, even defeating Tilly at Mingolsheim in 1622. However, the combined Spanish/Liga forces eventually overcame them, capturing the Lower Palatinate and sending the remnants of the Protestant forces retreating north to the Netherlands.
>cont
Pic related sums it up
>>939296
I hope the middle flag is supposed to be Bohemia and not Poland.
>>939282
The neutral Dutch did accept the fleeing Protestant forces, providing some aid to them, but they were reluctant to keep them for too long, lest they bring the Austrians into their war with Spain. Both would go east, first into East Frisia, and eventually into Lower Saxony. In 1625, the Danes had joined the war, owing to the threat the Imperial forces were posing to Protestants in northern Germany and Denmark's regional hegemony.
Though the Palatinate was no longer in the war (Frederick V had made peace after the defeat at Stadlohn on 1623), the Emperor, in his infinite wisdom, had decided the best course of action was to collectively punish the entire protestant population of the HRE with the Edict of Restitution in 1624. Unsurprisingly, the Protestants rose up. Tilly was sent to counter Christian's move into Lower Saxony. Meanwhile, Ferdinand, fearing that letting Tilly and the Liga forces lead the conflict would undermine Imperial authority, commissioned Albrecht von Wallenstein, a Bohemian noble, to raise and lead an Imperial army.
Wallenstein raised a massive army, using a new policy of procurement which involved drawing resources off the local population. The policy was tremendously unpopular and fairly devastating to regions the army passed through, but it seemed to work.Wallenstein took on Mansfeld, defeating him and ultimately leading to the disbandment of his forces, while Tilly decisively defeated Christian of Brunswick's forces, killing him, as well as the new Danish forces in 1626.
The combined forces of Wallenstein and Tilly then marched north, clearing Protestant forces from Lower Saxony and taking Jutland. However, due to the lack of a fleet, they were unable to march on Copenhagen. Thus, Wallenstein laid seige on Stralsund in 1628 in hopes of capturing a port large enough to build an invasion fleet.
>cont
>>939380
Christian of Denmark responded to the siege by landing another invasion force in Pomerania, forcing Wallenstein to break the siege to confront him. The invasion went poorly, however, with Wallenstein decisively defeating the Danes once more, leading to the Peace of Lubeck in 1629.
Denmark was now out of the war, allowing Wallenstein to continue consolidating gains in Pomerania. The siege of Stralsund resumed, but by now the Swedes had gained interest. Though currently occupied with a campaign in Prussia, the Swedes had sent a large contingent of "volunteers" to support Stralsund, allowing it to hold out until 1630. Various bridgeheads were made across the Pomeranian coast, providing an adequate landing site for the Swedes once they finally decided to join in.
Sweden gained a stake in the war for numerous reasons. Most obvious was the support for the Protestant cause and their ally Stralsund, but there was also a drive to gain holdings in Pomerania to usurp Danish regional superiority. Additionally, Richelieu in France was working to keep the war going in Germany to keep the Habsburgs weak while he consolidated his position in France. Thus, Sweden was being bankrolled by France for an invasion.
The invasion finally came in 1630, with Gustavus Adolphus and Oxenstierna leading an invasion force, ferried by 200 transports, that landed near Stettin. The Swedes quickly consolidated their position in Pomerania and prepared to move south. Meanwhile, the Imperial/Liga forces were in a poor position. Wallenstein was dismissed in September 1630 owing to protests from Liga members, with marshal Pappenheim taking his place. The combined Imperial/Liga forces had also moved south, working to capture protestant holdouts further inland.
>cont
>>938422
Basically, Emperor sucked off the Pope, Protestant chimped out, Swedes were gigantic cunts, Germans died.
>>939440
Unfortunately, the sacking of Wallenstein failed to stop the devastating campaigning his armies practiced. In 1631, Imperial/Liga forces captured Magdeburg, sacking it and reducing the city of 25,000 to just 500. That same September, the Swedes met the Imperial forces on the battlefield for the first time at Brietenfeld.
There, Adolphus decisively defeated Tilly. Tilly fled south, but, with no other allied armies to prevent the Swedes from sweeping into Bavaria, he was forced to stand firm on the Lech river. In 1632, Tilly tried to prevent the Swedes from crossing into Bavaria, but he was caught by a cannonball and his forces defeated once more.
The decisive defeat of Tilly forced Ferdinand to call Wallenstein back into action. The Swedes swept across most of Germany, but Wallenstein raised a new army and began campaigning north, threatening the Swedish rear. The Swedes turned to confront him, meeting at Lutzen.
At Lutzen, Wallenstein set up a defensive position across a ditch from the Swedes, setting up in such a way that the Swedes would have to make a frontal assault. At the same time, a call was made to Pappenheim for reinforcements. The battle began without Pappenheim's forces, with Gustavus Adolphus leading a cavalry assault on the Imperial left flank. The Swedish cavalry, led by their king, threatened to break the Imperial line, but they were saved by the timely arrival of Pappenheim. Though Pappenheim was killed in the struggle, the line restabilized. Meanwhile, Gustavus Adolphus was separated from his men in the chaos. He was shot several times and eventually fell from his horse, where he was killed by enemy forces.
In the center, Swedish forces managed to capture the Imperial artillery, forcing the Imperial forces to retire. The Imperial forces would withdraw after the battle, making it a nominal Swedish victory, but it came at a heavy cost - the Swedes suffered similar casualties and lost their king - the driving force of the campaign.
>>939525
At this point, the war began to devolve into a massive clusterfuck. Gustavus's adviser, Oxenstierna, took command of the campaign in Germany, but the campaigning was far less successful. Wallenstein continued campaigning, eventually bringing the Saxons (who had since switched over to the Protestant cause) back to the Imperial side. He also opened negotiations with various protestant powers, gaining him the ire of the Emperor.
Ultimately, Wallenstein's controversial campaigning and independent negotiations caught up with him - in early 1634, fearing Wallenstein was going to rebel, Ferdinand had him assassinated.
With all the competent commanders on all sides now dead, the war ground down. Plagues were now ravaging Germany thanks to the Imperial forces that had been brought in from Italy, and nobody had the money, men, or willpower to really commit to a decisive campaign. Swedish territories were slowly whittled away, and in 1634 the Spanish routed the Swedes at Nordlingen.
In 1635, the war finally seemed to be winding down with the Peace of Prague, which revoked the controversial Edict of Restitution, dissolved the Catholic Liga and Heilbronn League (the German-Swedish alliance), created a single army under Imperial command, and took Brandenburg and Saxony out of the war.
>>939566
Of course, Richelieu was going to have none of that shit. Recognizing that Sweden could not continue the campaign alone, France declared war on the Habsburgs, opening a campaign against the Spanish in 1635 and the Austrians in 1636.
The Swedes, with renewed funding from France, managed to reverse their losses after Nordlingen in 1636, but the French campaigns went disastrously. Combined Imperial/Spanish forces ravaged eastern France and even threatened Paris, and, though Bernhard of Saxe-Weimar would repulse the enemy forces, the French campaigning would go poorly for several years.
In 1637, Emperor Ferdinand died, leaving the throne to his son Ferdinand III. Ferdinand III began making efforts to end the war, though his forces would manage to decisively defeat what remained of the Palatinate once and for all, taking them out of the war.
Things started to improve for the French/Swedes in 1640. Portugal rebelled in 1640, forcing Spain to divert their attentions away from the war in Germany, and French gains in Lorraine, Savoy, and Alsace, combined with Dutch gains in Flanders severed the land route Spain had used to keep their German forces supplied. In 1642, the Swedes again routed the Imperial forces at Brietenfeld, and the war again seemed to be going in favor of the anti-Habsuburg forces.
>>938422
>I'm an Amerifat, and never took a proper European History course.
All you need to know is that they were not free.
>>939625
At the end of 1642, Richelieu died, and the next year, the French king died as well, leaving France to his five-year-old son. French/Swedish victories continued, however, with the Spanish Tercios decisively defeated at Rocroi in 1643 and the Swedes preemptively intervening against the Danes to prevent them from reentering the war on the Imperial side.
However, French fortunes were reversed again, bringing the war to a stalemate. By 1644, all involved belligerents had begun negotiating for peace. In the meantime, the French and Swedes continued campaigning in the Lower Rhineland and Bohemia, respectively. They were met with success in both places, but they lacked the resources to really make a decisive impact.
Ultimately, after four years of negotiations, the Peace of Munster was signed, putting an end to the war. Over the next several months, a series of treaties known as the Peace of Westphalia were signed by all belligerents, drastically altering the map of Europe and finally putting an end to the conflict.
BIG SWEDISH COCK
>>938471
I thought they were thrown off the walls
>>939654
Thanks senpai
Thanks anon. That was a really informative series of posts. People like you are what make /his/ threads worthwhile.
>>939525
Always Breitenfield.
The Father of Modern War, Gustavus Adolphus almost certainly was not. But he may very well have been the Father of the Modern World. Because then, at that place, at the moment when the Saxons broke and the Inquisition bade fair to triumph over all of Europe, the king of Sweden stood his ground.
And proved, once again, that the truth of history is always concrete. Abstractions are the stuff of argument, but the concrete is given. Whatever might have been, was not. Not because of tactics, and formations, and artillery, and methods of recruitment—though all of those things played a part, and a big one—but because of a simple truth. At that instant, history pivoted on the soul of one man. His name was Gustavus Adolphus, and there were those among his followers who thought him the only monarch in Europe worthy of the name. They were right, and the man was about to prove it. For one of the few times in human history, royalty was not a lie.
>>939735
If you really want to know more, I'd highly recommend you pick up the book mentioned here:
>>938533
Even with like 10 posts summarizing it, there's too much to explain in one thread. Wilson's book is like 800 pages, and it does an excellent job explaining it, even if you have no exposure to the era.
>~200 pages explaining each belligerent in extreme detail
>discussions of all the tertiary conflicts that happened as a result of the war
>excruciating detail of everything down to funding armies and pay rates of individual soldiers
>>938617
> A game about the 30 year war written in a silly Metal Gear Solid style with military action blended with over the top retarded things happening
I didn't knew I wanted this and I'll die a little bit more empty inside knowing this will never happen.
>>939762
Not gong to lie, this would be the best thing ever
>flintlock cqc
>over the top noble bosses
>tactical espionage and infiltration
>attack the enemy winter quarters/star fort
So many feels
Meanwhile, the Netherlands kicked the shit out of Spain in the 80 years' war at around the same time.
>>939625
Always loved this painting.
Also I've been told the armies in this period pretty much consisted of mercenaries, any truth to that?
>>940303
Yup, that was pretty much the case, from what I remember. For reference, the majority of the Spanish and Swedish armies in the 30 Years War were Germans.
You also had huge numbers of volunteers serving with various armies. The Swedes in particular had thousands of Scots and Englishmen aiding them.
>>938422
Papist cunts murdered millions of Christians.
There, you're up to speed now.
>>940377
There was plenty of killing on both sides + some needless meddling by France and Sweden just for shits and giggles.
>>938422
Dont feel bad. Why would you have ever taken a european history lesson? Who cares? Lol
>>940510
>Papist false moral equivalencies.
>A new thing.
Pick one.
>>940545
To be fair, the details of the 30 Years' War aren't too important so much as the impact of it. If we're just taking a broader view of Yuro/World history, it's a lot easier to just skip the entire war and just talk about the Peace of Westphalia and its effects.
Germany got rekt.
>>939678
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defenestrations_of_Prague
>>940593
Not just that, but unless it's a college level course there's too much going on to go too crazy into it, especially with most high schoolers attention spans
>>939651
Great post anon. I assume you read Wilson.
>>941574
Yup. That's where I got all that from. Probably the best history book I've ever read about any subject.
>>941580
Try his book on the >H >R >E as well.
France uses Sweden to cuck the HRE
bump
