would you rather witness a speech from Jesus or Muhammad, if you could go back in time?
Jesus.
Jesus managed convince a bunch of cunts to (literally) eat his own body.
Muhammed was just a normal leader whose disciples were great conquerors.
neither, since I don't speak ancient goat herder language.
>>923522
That's Ali pbuh, not Muhammad pbuh.
Jesus. Since we don't have any texts directly authored by him, I would be more curious about what he himself has to say. If I wanted to know what Mohammad thought I could just read the Koran.
I would smother Muhammad with a rock
>>923537
This is a good point
>>923537
Muslim here. Agreed. I'd love to hear Isa alayhi assalaam speak.
>>923537
>Since we don't have any texts directly authored by him,
Neither do we have anything by Muhammad. the Quran was written down only after Muhammad's death.
>>923529
I don't know I don't have much trouble convincing cunts to eat my body if you know what I mean.
>>923587
The Quran wasn't authored by Muhammad. The hadith isn't either, but at least it has Muhammad's direct speeches.
>>923522
Muslim here. Jesus.
>>923621
>The hadith isn't either, but at least it has Muhammad's direct speeches.
Same goes for gospels which quote whole sermons.
>>923522
>Go back in time
>Kill both before they convince anyone
>Create your own bullshit religion
>Go back to the future
>Be treated like a returning Jesus
>>923644
>Quote whole sermons
From orally conveyed stories, written documents now lost (If a Q document exists) and their imagination.
None of the gospels were direct witnesses.
I'm not making a point for the Quran here, I'm just pointing that out.
>>923788
>kill them
People already tried that
>>923964
It worked in Mahomet's case. He died when he was poisoned by the widow of one of his many victims.
>>924050
I simply pointed out how the man died. I'm not sure how this makes me "butthurt".
I'm not an American Christian by the way. Remember Khaibar, Achmed. :^)
>>923522
Who the hell is in charge of this time travelling company?
There are hundreds of people that I would rather meet.
>>924093
Jesus is probably the most influential man in history, don't know why you won't go to him first
>>924107
Only really from the PoV of a Christian though.
Arguably the people who compiled all the made up mythology about Jesus were more influential than Jesus especially since no one gave enough of a shit about him to put anything in writing while he was still alive or at least within a decade of his life.
>>923522
That's Ali not Muhammad.
Muhammad had some pretty baller speeches though.
>>923522
that's Ali.
I'd rather a speech from Ali than from either Jesus or Mohammad. Jesus was a literally who hippy carpenter, I've met hundreds like him. Mohammad was a failed merchant paedo, literally gil from the Simpsons who happened to get lucky on one of his get rich schemes.
Ali was a hero.
>>923522
>watch either speech
>have no idea what is being said due to the language barrier
OR
>go back in time to that day and age
>قتل الكلب الكافر الأبيض!!!
>dead
I'd obviously go to Muhammad PBUH as to get a possible answer to the whole terrorism Bullshit
>tfw when you're Chaldean
>tfw you can speak the supposed language of Jesus
>>923522
I'm a muslim but I'd choose Jesus (sws).
>>923554
Do Muslims actually think all of their prophets went by an Arabic name?
>>924237
SHITE muslim detected, report and hide.
>>924346
He wouldn't even understand what bombs are but he'd definitely saying killing yourself and a ton of random people is wrong.
No religious leader advocated killing random people no matter what the internet will try to tell you.
>>924176
they still had to work with something, hence most influential.
>>923522
Muhammed because it would help clear some stuff up.
Jesus because all of the stuff written about him isn't written by him
>>924237
Shia detected
>>923522
Jesus. There no parts of Islam that are really hard to understand or would be greatly clarified by listening to Mohammed. Hearing what Jesus literally said and hear him explain it would be world changing
>>923537
Just a correction. Quran is the word of god, The hadiths are the words of Muhammed pbuh.
Honestly, I wouldn't have much to ask either of them, and this comes from a nominal Muslim (not really that religious). I guess I'd give the edge to Muhammad to ask him who's right in the Sunni-Shia schism, but I guess you could also ask Jesus who is right in the Catholic-Protestant-Orthodox schism (that's less relevant nowadays though).
If I had to ability to travel back in time and meet their contemporaries too, then I'd pick Muhammad for sure. I'd like to meet guys like Umar, Ali, Khalid-ibn al Walid, those lads.
>>924050
>having opinions different than yours is being butthurt
Classical muslim.
t. ex muslim
>>923522
I prefer the real deal, not the intimidation.
>>924554
>Confused buster.jpg
>>>R/asablackman
>>924378
Jesus is a latin alteration of Yeshua, so what's your point?
>>924531
>The hadiths are the words of Muhammed pbuh
not really
I'd probably rather listen to Jesus so afterwards I could ask him questions and that. I have a lot of questions.
>>924378
>"I pray to the reeeeal God. His name is God T. Lord. His boy's name is Geeezus"
>>923522
An epileptic or an idiot...hmmmmm
>>924994
Why not just call him by his real name, yeshua ha-notzri?
>>925437
No, the man whom English-speaking Christians refer to as jesus was actually called yeshua ha-notzri
>>925451
Damn son, that went right over your head like INRI and a crown of thorns
>>925443
It's easier for burgers to say JEEEEZUSSTH as they wheeze and have a comfort burger
>>923958
>None of the gospels were direct witnesses.
The Q parts were.
>>925502
>yuropoors
Noor e Muhammad salallah
>>923522
I'd rather listen to the Buddha share.
>>924994
What language did he speak? Hebrew? Latin?
>>926135
Me too. Or Guru Nanak.
>>923522
Jesus
Muhammad (pbuh)
Isa (aws) would be interesting, too
>>926214
>(pbuh)
>(aws)
Don't do this. Either type out the whole thing, or don't say it at all.
The blessing of God should never be abbreviated.
Are all the Muslims here trolls or what
>>926446
Some, I guess
>>925515
Except there's no particular reason to think that.
The hypothetical source that Matthew and Luke share did not survive to the present day.
>>923522
I would say Jesus, because then he would at least be speaking American.
>>926643
/his/ pill best pill
>>926644
Meant to reply to this >>926641
I'm so tired mayng
>>926643
>Give me one good reason we shouldn't gas the middle east.
There are more Muslims outside of the middle east than in it.
>>926643
Because violence begets violence.
Jesus.
Mohammed was an illiterate warlord who took orders from a demonic spirit.
>>927533
> Mohammed was an illiterate
Jesus was literate? He was just a carpenter.
>>923529
...are you saying Jesus "disappeared" from his tomb because he was eaten?
>>923522
Muhammad.
There had to be something about him, some charisma, that allowed him to Unite Arabia. He's probably a more engaging speaker than Jesus, but I'd just like to see if he was real, or a Romulus sort of thing, a bunch of figures combined.
>>927533
>an illiterate warlord who took orders from a demonic spirit
But I'd listen to that kind of guy's speech. Compared to a carpenter's for example.
>>927588
>put sword on neck
>"Convert or DIE!"
That's how Islam spread.
Nothing charismatic about that satanic moon cult.
>>927607
If it were that simple they would have been wiped out almost immediately.
>>927607
>being this bad at history
Go back to /pol/ you retard.
>>927617
>Mongols
>Huns
>Muslims
Gee, it's almost as if violent cultures are known to spread and conqueror alot of territory!
Not to mention that Byzantine and the Sassanids were tired and fatigued of war.
>>927607
that's an impossible way of spreading a religion, nobody "converted" that way would truly believe
Probably Mohhammed, because he seems more mysterious to me. How could Islam spread so fast? Jesus I can understand - history is full of weird little hippie cults, and that's all it was during his lifetime.
>>927623
Why don't you take a plane to Syria and visit Raqqa?
Go and get beheaded by your poor misunderstood ISIS friends who dindu nuffin.
Delusional sheltered liberal.
>>927627
Islam spread the same way that Communism did in Russia.
i.e Terror and Fear
>>927624
Mongols were a pre-existing warrior culture. Islam is not a culture, it's a religion.
>>927634
nigger what
without the original support of the proletariat communism wouldn't have gone anywhere
>>927634
What a surprise, you don't know anything about communism either.
>>927630
What the fuck are you even talking about?
>>927648
nice false flag
>>927650
I dunno, Poe's Law and all that.
>>927648
This is not /pol/ and we actually discuss history here.
>waahhhh muslims dindu nuffin! it's a religion of peace!
>literally beheading and torturing Christians in the Middle-East right now
Liberals are so clueless and know nothing about the world.
Leftist multikult brainwashing does this to people, see the invasion of Europe right now. White women getting raped and attacked by these savage sandniggers and liberals don't bat an eye.
>>927654
History shows that Islam has always been a violent death cult bent on conquering the world.
>>923958
Didn't a group find a Q document recently?
Muhammad didn't do that convert or die thing, he was a very peaceful guy. Go read up about the conquest of Mecca if you are interested. It was a bloodless conquest.
The caliphs and successors after him arguably did though. To their defense, expansionism was really a thing back then, heck, it is still a thing. But that's another issue, we are talking about Muhammad here.
>>926151
Aramaic.
>>927658
Just like any other major culture in history, right.
>>927674
Sure thing Achmed.
>>927655
Literally no one has said anything like that in this thread. If you're going to jump to conclusions and argue based in strawmen, then there's a great place I can recommend - it's called /pol/.
>>927674
>he was a very peaceful guy.
>>923522
We have so many sahih hadith from Muhammad, Jesus would be more interesting.
this thread explains alot of things
>>923522
What did Muhammad say? Give me your 9 year olds, behead those we insult Islam.
>>927681
It was non-violent during the Roman Empire. It was arguably/partly spread by oppression and probably political pressure to the medieval Europe. Then you have the crusades. Then you have the European colonialism to do it to the rest of the world, which was nothing "by love" at all.
On the other hand, the Muslims was largely spread by violence only against the Byzantine and the Sassanid. What do expect from two warlike major powers who has been in war for hundred of years? North Africa was mostly accepting. It was spread by trade to the South and Southeast Asia, when both combined is the home for about 60% Muslims on Earth.
>>927836
Charlemagne conquered people and forcibly converted them
>>927630
He's talking about history, not current events
Go to /pol/ for that
>>927674
>Another Muslim named Abdullah then came by and put his foot on Abu Jahl’s neck and taunted him before decapitating him:
Then I cut off his head and brought it to the apostle saying, “This is the head of the enemy of Allah, Abu Jahl.”… I threw his head before the apostle and he gave thanks to Allah. (Ibn Ishaq/Hisham 451)
>Jesus
"Anyone who doesn't heed my message will be cast into the eternal fire, for time is running out, and the Kingdom of God is rapidly approaching!"
>Mohammed
"A camel's footprint in the sand is evidence of God's existence!"
Probably Jesus desu
>>927674
“When the apostle ordered him to be killed, Uqba said, “But who will look after my children, O Muhammad?” [Muhammad’s reply] “Hell.” The man was put to death. (Ibn Ishaq/Hisham 458)
>>927674
[Taqiya intensifies]
>>927674
"Allah's Messenger said, 'Two deens [religion] shall not co-exist in the Arabian Peninsula,' and he therefore expelled the Jews from Khaybar." (Malik 45:18)
>>927674
A Jewish woman used to insult the Prophet and say bad things about him, so a man strangled her until she died, and the Prophet ruled that no blood money was due in this case. (Abu Dawud 4349)
>>923533
/thread. But probably Jesus, he had better catering.
Muhammad. He's the successful version of Jesus. Christianity solely spread because of Jesus' disciples, Muhammad actually united Arabia in his lifetime.
>>930142
This. Muhammad must have been charismatic as hell in order to go from epileptic merchant to ruler of the most violent, disagreeable people on the planet
>inb4 spread by the sword
Doesn't explain how he got people all around the Arabian peninsula and the horn of Africa to tolerate him long enough to sweep the rug out from under them
>>924994
>not calling him Iesous like a civilized greek
>>923522
Jesus.
Who is Muhammad to me?
>>927681
>Christianity spread by love
>Just don't count the largest Christian sect
>Also please ignore colonialism
>>927624
>muh protracted war
>muh Byzantines and Sassanids were tired
Yes, tired enough to raise larger armies consistently and then consistently get their asses kicked, the latter of which were annihilated from history and their culture cucked into eternity
>>927681
what is the Christian form of taqiyya? cause that's you
>>923522
You can't see any speech from Jesus as he never existed.
>>931432
>he didnt exist because i say so
Self-hating liberal detected.
>>931456
Kill yourself and do some research.
>>931470
I have, and after my research I came to the conclusion that the Bible is correct.
Keep studying, I'll wait for you on the top of the mountain.
>>931475
My sides. I laugh at people like you.
>>930304
there's not supposed to be a Christian taqiyya, because Jesus exhorted his followers to always tell the truth, even if it could get them killed. Christians lie all the time, of course, but it's antithetical to Christ's teachings.
jesus because he actually had interesting things to say to the jews, unlike muhammed who just wanted to conquer and acquire wives
>>927635
>Islam is not a culture
ahaha, you're a fool to believe it. Sharia directs almost all aspect in life for a muslim, from sex to business
>>923522
I would like too shot Muhammed with a gun in the middle of one of his speeches.
>>924050
>Why do American Christians get so butthurt about a man who lived 1500 years ago?
>Implying only american christians hate him.
The dude ruined the middle east and turned the land that once hosted the first civilizations to the land of a violent cult.
>>932411
>>932418
Are you retarded? It's still the center of human civilization up until the late middle ages where the Mongols ruined everything.
>>927607
/pol/fag get out of here.
>>932146
>being this brain washed by /pol/
Mohammed(PBUH) t bh
Why not both?
>>923522
Either, as long as I could take a fucking sniper rifle with me.
>>932741
>dibs bedora :DD
>>931475
To unambigously reach the conclusion of biblical accuracy in the matter you have to depart with the assumption of biblical accuracy which then confirms the doubtworthy secular claims like Tacitus by providing, among other things, disambiguation (Because Tacitus never actually refers to Christ unambiguously, instead refering to Chrstus which when given context by what we know of the text just leads to Chrestus which isn't the same as Christus).
There is a lot of special pleading involved in assuming that Jesus certainly existed.
You can't actually know if the figure that Jesus is based on actually existed based only on currently available evidence.
It's a less extraordinary claim than god existing so I guess I'd just go with maybe.
>>932770
He is though most middle eastern people out of their own will partly because of the heavy taxation by the byzies and persians but also partly by jizya.
>>932783
Converted*
>>930298
>huge armies=guaranteed win
You are obviously a fucking moron who doesn't understand that other factors play part in battles other than numbers. Especially when Byzantium and Persia fought for almost 30 continuous years. Do you not realize the effects that are caused by a war like that?
>>926643
>it's 2016 guys
>>923522
Muhammad, he was actually influential during his lifetime, not some lame duck that was glorified for power.
>>924378
Makes a hell of a lot more sense than actually thinking he was called "Jesus"
>>924404
You are fucking retarded if you think Jesus was more influential than Muhammad. He was a nobody, and stories of him were completely fabricated for the power of the church.
>>924492
It would have nothing in common with the scripture, that's for sure.
>>926643
Please don't gas me. Anyway, even if you destroy the middle east there would still be 1 billion Muslims left
>>927559
he was well learned from the 3 wise men when he lived out east during his lost days
>>927674
>people don't seem to believe that a human messenger of God could act in an unmistakably human fashion
If there's anything that Islam teaches then it is that Muhammad was but a man. A messenger and a prophet but also a man and so capable of human things and emotions.
Looking at the stories of the Bible is it then a surprise that Muhammad could be harsh? Does it contradict anything?
>>932860
Lol, sorry you got so butt blasted Yazdegerd III. It's not like the Muslims were literally engaged in warfare from the inception of their religion, considering it is a religion largely based around warfare.
A rational human being would assume that the civilization with more numerous, more well equipped and better supplied armies with access to tested field commanders and veterans would pose a challenge but the Sassanians just got steamrolled within a few campaigns.
At least the Byzantines checked the Islamic advance on multiple occasions and even managed to take back some of their land later on. Persians just got BTFO all the way to China, literally.
I would really want to hear the speech muhammad gave at gadhir khum
>>924216
>That's Ali not Muhammad.
No, no, no - that's Muhammad Ali!
>>923522
Jesus, to see if he actually existed or not. I'd be surprised honestly.
>>932783
Also because if you follow older religions where your god is fallible and a superior god can be found if you get rekt hard, it's not that big of a leap to go "this allah must be fucking amazing, sign me up for some of that"
>>927607
hahahahha excellent historical analysis child
I'm a muslim but I don't Jesus seems like a pretty cool dude to hang up and I bet I would say some stupid shit around Muhammad and get myself stoned to dead.
>>927624
>Mongols
Their empire broke in 60 years, and collapsed in 180.
>Huns
It could not even be considered an empire. Didn't collapsed; there was nothing to collapse.
>Muslims
1302 Years dominating much of the human population and much of the economic output of the world. Being invaded, suffering mass genocide (see the first item in the list), losing much of its territory, and regenerating over time.
...How about opening a book once in a lifetime?
>>940884
Muslims
Dominating
Pick one, slime.
>>923522
Jesus, because nothing he said is preserved
>>924378
Jesus, "Isa" in Arabic is in fact closer to its Aramic pronunciation than the Latin "Jesus".
>>940900
Back to /pol.
>>940910
Yeshua
Isa
holy fuck my sides are exploding again
>>940916
/his/ board
claims muslims dominate the world
back to /pol/
>>940940
Are you that fucking retarded to think "Yeshua" is pronounced how westerners pronounce it? Holy fuck, my sides. Almost as funny as the fact that the entire Judeo-Christian heritage of the west which originated due to a middle eastern religion is what allowed the basis of the regions laws and moral code. BUT THAT DOESNT MATTER BECAUSE YESHUA IS PRONOUNCED HOW WESTERNERS PRONOUNCE IT HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
>>940964
yeah. Yeshua.
>>940968
No. You're wrong. Fuck off now and back to pronouncing words from middle eastern languages in the most cucked and innacurate way as possible.
>>940983
Ye-shu-a.
>>941000
Cringe.
>>941019
Ye.
Shu.
A.
>>941022
>In English, the name Yeshua is extensively used by followers of Messianic Judaism,[5] whereas East Syrian Christian denominations use the name Isho in order to preserve the Aramaic or Syriac name of Jesus.
Don't blame burgers for their poor education.
>>923522
I don't need to go back in time to speak with Jesus.
For Muhammad I just have to wait / die and go to hell.
>>934877
>Does it contradict anything?
Well, it does contradict the prophets from around the Babylonian exile, who said that YHWH basically wanted that violence shit to stop and that he never wanted anyone to die.
And it obviously contradicts the gospel stories, in which Jesus preaches an absolutely pacifist message.
Islam basically retcons these by saying that Judaism and Christianity were corrupted anyway.
>>927674
>he was a very peaceful guy
tell that to the jews of Khaybar
>>923522
That's not Mohammed asshole. It's the true successor who was BTFO by that cunt Aisha.
>>923537
Mohammed was illiterate and didn't write shit.
>>942995
How are you so sure?
>>944084
I'd assume that it's because it's not a particularly extraordinary claim.
There's no real evidence that he existed (Fuck off with Josephus and Tacitus, those can be dismissed or at least doubted with a paragraph each, do some dumb research) and you are unlikely to procure evidence for his absence (Can't prove a negative, which is why I tend towards the side of doubting he existed) unless you prove that Jesus was just straight up adapted from mythology or whatever.
There is a chance that Jesus existed as a vestigial foundation for the dumb oral traditions that got passed around in the first century.
>>933236
Muhammad literally copied Jesus' and the other prophets' styles and used it for personal gain.
And the same could be said for stories about Muhammad
>>927685
Jews deserved it tho
How the fuck can ppl still believe in the 3 monotheistic religions.. a fkin fraud, theres so manny proof, its debunked 800 times, these were religions that were created to controle the ppl, there were libraries around the black see were xtians muslims n jews met n aranged their theories n clocks, they killed off the older religions, incorperated them in theirs, how fking dumb can u be to still fking concider these 3 bs fairytales.. take the fking egyptians, romans, vikings compare their origyn sagas, their all the same, go back to sumeria, pls get ur fkin heads out of ur asses, i fkin hate ppl
>>923522
Jesus. I don't associate with murderous pedophiles.
>>927630
What a fucking autist.
>>923522
Jesus
Neither seems very interesting.
>>923522
Probably Jesus, as I'm a Christian.
>>923522
Neither.
I'd rather go back in time to listen to the greatest orator in history.
>>923522
Jesus, I just want to feel the smugness and see mfw Christianity is wrong.
>>923522
Jesus Christ for sure
Not Muhammad, because it was said the he would have convulsions whenever he had "visions" and foam at the mouth and growl like a camel
His first wife thought it was demonic possession
No other prophet had violent fits and thrash about when they saw visions
>>943082
So let me get this straight. Muhamad marries a 6 year old and fucks her when she's 9.
One day she's accompanying Muhammad on his warmongering and gets left behind in the desert. She hitches a ride with a man named Safwan, on his camel.
When she gets back to the war procession, they're all saying she cheated by riding another man's camel. Muhammad's son in law, Ali, tells Mo to ditch her, there are plenty more fish in the sea.
Muhammad likes Aisha so prays on the matter, and is visited by the angel Gabriel, who conveniently tells him Aisha didn't cheat, and that he should take her back.
Aisha never forgives Ali and opposes his succession to Muhammad on his death, leading to the first fitna. They face each other at the battle of the camel.
And all this leads to modern conflict in the middle east? Violence and killing because a girl rode another man's camel?
I'd rather witness a speech from god itself, so I could know if it really did exist.
>>946265
Or he had epilepsy.
So consensus is on Jeebus
Could have mad a straw poll for it.
But yeah Yeshúa` was probably a more pivotal figure in world history although the Quran makes for a better action/war movie.
>>946265
His wife was right.
>>946282
Hmmmm, Gabriel telling a man that his young wife didn't cheat on him.
Seems like I've heard that story before....
>>946284
ok have fun
pic related is probably what would happen to you.
>>932410
>too
Hmmmm, God or some illiterate arab warlord.
Such a hard decision.
Jesus, obviously.
>>946633
Huh... quite a coincidence, innit? But it's tooootally a coincidence. There's absolutely no other explanation...
>>927674
Yeah no.
The fact that he personally oversaw executions of jews and pagans, and that he doled out captive women and children like a common brigand to his followers, speak against that.
Muhammad himself had sex slaves, and he stole another man's wife out of sheer lust and lied when he claimed that "God had told him" that she was to be his concubine.
When Jesus and his early followers faced persecution and death, they welcomed it. And yet they thrived.
Muhammad just conquered shit and gave them a choice of conversion, Jizya tax (If you were a jew or a christian) or death.
>>923788
Try and make your own religon, convince a crowd of people to kill jesus go foward in time, you are a pharisie.
>>949130
>Hmmmm, God or some illiterate arab warlord.
They're both Jewish heresy, it's also likely that both were illiterate considering Jesus never wrote anything of his own accord.
>>946619
>But yeah Yeshúa` was probably a more pivotal figure in world history although the Quran makes for a better action/war movie
They literally had to un-Jew his name and his entire message just to get goys to accept him
>>923522
get the feeling a speach by jesus would at least be somewhat enlightening or thought provoking, while a speech from muhamed would just feel like someones pointing a finger at my face till i show required submission
Some guy that tells me to love people who want to rail my ass and murder me or some guy that tells me to not to take shit and let's me have plenty of wives and sex slaves?
Not a tough choice
How about Moses? He's even more doubtful as a historical figure, but I want to see him as bad.
>>924050
>PBUH
Piss be on him? I agree
>>952752
One of the perks of being a Christian is spending eternity with people like Moses. And Jesus. And never meeting Mohammad.
>>955199
>spending eternity with people like Moses. And Jesus.
If Jesus is like he is in the bible, he's a cunt. And Moses was alsow an twat
>>952476
>Jesus wants to rail your ass and kill you
Wat
Neither. Jesus was a schizo and muhammad was a lunatic. Fuck em both right in their pussies.
>>955750
You have to be 18 to post on this site
>>955332
reading comprehension, try it sometime
