>Look up your family tree.
>Your granddad was a mass murderer.
>>451453
>be me
>12 years old
>I loved Hitler so much
>I read Mein Kampf and listened to all of his speeches
>ACHTUNG JUDEN, I would say
>attempt to remove all Jews from my hometown for Lebensraum
>get in trouble, call police filthy red menace-puppets of the Jew
>one night I am reciting the SS oath
>dad hears and calls me a nazi faggot
>call him untermensch
>he slaps me and threatens to partition Germany
>I'm in bed now, my face hurts
>suddenly it smells of beer and Arbeit
>I'm in a beerhall, in front of me is Hitler in his glory
>DEUTSCHLAND ÜBER ALLES he says as he penetrates my asshole
>dad hears and storms my room like Normandy
>Hitler looks at him and calls him Amerikaner schweinhund
>fills my ass with his love
>hops out the window to restore the Fatherland
>auf Wiedersehen, mein Junge
>Hitler is love
>Hitler is life
>Look up family tree
>Great grandfather was Irish
JUST
>Look up family tree
>turns out you're related to the second signer of the Declaration of Independence
feels pretty good man
>>451453
>look up family tree
>related to george washington
>turns out by extensions related to most other presidents
P cool senpai.
>Reading through family tree
>Descended from Duke of Wellington
>mfw plebs think they can top this
>be in 10th grade
>was a huge /pol/tard
>was zealously anti-semitic because I was teased for looking Jewish
>look up my famil y tree to validate whiteness
>there's actually some Jewish people in my family tree
JUST
>look up family tree
>great great etc. grandfather was caught counterfeiting British coins in a puritan colony, sentenced to have an ear cut off, but eventually acquitted because he made a ring for the judge
>captured by the Spanish during the revolutionary war
>later created the first map of North America made by an American citizen
Pretty cool guy
>look through family tree
>great grandfather specialized in psychology/sociology (don't remember which)
>he also beat his children
>look up family tree
>turns out you're descended from William of Orange
>JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN ENGLAND AND NETHERLANDS BY THIS FUCKING POINT.
Exponential growth, crazy shit mang.
What do you guys use to look at your family tree?
>>451517
>>was zealously anti-semitic because I was teased for looking Jewish
iktf
>look up family tree
>not related to fucking anyone but fucking MINERS
>>451494
I'm sorry boss. One day you can be a real human!
>related to a Lieutenant Governor of the New South Wales Colony
>he also fought in the American War of Independence
>also related to a Frenchman who was sent to Australia for forging coins in Guernsey
So the convicts one of my ancestor's was guarding ended up fucking one of his descendants.
>>451595
I was full on, lets-round-up-all-these-goddamned-jews-and-give-them-a-real-holocaust stormfag
I shudder at the things I thought, said, and did back then. Not a retarded self-hating SJW now or anything I just left that behind me.
>>451517
fucking owned lol
>related to a princess of the Persian Empire
Feels pretty damn comfy
>>451518
Wow. Did Connecticut really claim all that land? That's hilarious.
>>451652
It's okay, I was an anti-semite too. At least you had a (still not acceptable but slightly understandable) reason. Me, I was just angry and looking for someone to hate.
Is there a way to look this stuff up without having to pay? I can go back to one of my great grandmothers on my father's side.
>be shitskin
>look up family tree
>great-gramps is white
>feel a little better inside
>>451453
>look up family tree
>discover I am great grandson of a Hausa chief
>family descended from rulers of a Hausa city-state in the 1800s
WE
>be freak-of-nature mutt
>white ancestry is filled with thieves, murderers and arsonists
>shitskin ancestry is filled with wealthy landowners and entrepreneurs
how
>>451570
eyes
>>451453
>Look up family tree
>Mother's side is generic American Irish with a splash of Cherokee from forever ago
>Father's side is a very short branch of German that stops cold in the 1930s
>Da fuq?
>be australian
iktf bro
>Look up your family tree
>Everybody were Norwegian farmers
Everything went as expected.
>>452104
Mulatto children of Big Whites got property from their father. Small Whites married Mulattoes to marry up.
>mfw there is this guy wo is one my dad's great great grand fathers who is a total mystery
He is known in his family with one name and one last name but such person doesnt exist at any place or register, and his marriage certificate has another name and last name. All the properties are registered at his wife names and there is no photos of him, apparently he "hated" photos.
I swear that one day I will research that guy.
>>451453
where can i look up my family tree for free?
>>451609
Same except apparently one of my great grandfathers was a part of Bloody Harlan and supposedly helped blow up a building.
>>451453
>looks up family tree
>I am nobility
>thing goes back to 1300
Pretty based
>>452702
It's a vampire!
>nothing outstanding in family tree
>history of farmers and low ranking infantry
>Literally Nothing: The Bloodline
canon fodder is a way of life
My grandads were not really involved in the war as far as I know, but me and my mother have recently been told than one of my great uncles, who was from the part of france appropriated by germany (not alsace, the other part), fought at Stalingrad on the german side, survived, came back and died a few years later.
Apparently my grandmother didn't like to talk about it.
>uncommon last name
>look at family history
>there is a village outside of Krakow that is 75% people with your last name and pretty much all the rest are the people married to them
>look up family tree
>great-grandfathers on maternal side fought for the Entente in WWI, paternal side fought for Central Powers
>they all won medals
>feelsgoodman.wav
>do a little more digging
>...they were all mess cooks
J U S T
U
S
T
>>451453
>Look up my family tree
>great-grandpa was a machine gun operator in ww1
>grandpa was a bomber pilot in ww2
>papa is a retired policeman with some crim kills under his belt
Mine has been a bloodied family. The irony is that I'm studying to become a doctor.
>Old generation was two old and young generation too young to have served in either World War
FUCK YOU WE WEREN'T COWARDS
>>452818
not really irony senpai
>>451453
Coolest thing in my family tree is that my father's side (paternal name) has been in America since Europeans were first settling here. May be marginally related to William Clark as well. Other than that, it's a mess of people and european ethnicities that happened to meet in certain places and reproduce.
>>452708
Pretty tough to find unless you already know back to your greatgrandparents
>>453137
True. My own experience with ancestry wasn't magical like the commercials make it seem. 90% of what you can find are census records of people you've never heard of that don't tell you anything more than who was in the household and what county they lived in. Even birth dates and birthplaces were inconsistent depending on the census. Tried looking for military records of several people, some of whom are very recent like Op Iraqi Freedom, nothing. Adoption records for maternal grandfather, nothing. At best you might find further info on 1-2 distant ancestors.
>TFW no-one if interest whatsoever
>>452723
what resources did you use to find this out? Was it expensive?
>Look up your family tree
>find nothing past a certain date
It sucks being black when it comes to this stuff. Oh well, at least I found out that my relatives loved them some Chinese and Indian people, because I have a LOT of them in my family, despite looking pretty black. Thanks Jamaica.
>>452873
It sorta is. The irony he's referring to is that despite a family history of harming/killing others, he has chosen a profession in which he saves lives.
>>451453
>be mexican
>look up FT
>one great grandfather was a wealthy man living in Cuba, one of the few to get his stuff back after the revolution, he won a trial in NY in which the Cuban gvt was forced to pay back, when they didn't the American gvt sold some Cuban property in the states to cover it.
>other great grandfather was governor of my state and fought bravely against the indian uprising
>other great grandfather was an smuggler, passing banned goods over the mexican-american border
pretty fucking neat if you ask me
>family is literally made of poor irish farmers
Wow its nothing
>look up family tree
>one of my great great great grandfathers hijacked a train in germany, stole money and fled to canada
wew
>tfw I'm Canadian because of a train robber
>look up family tree
>am related to the inventor of the super cannon
>he died when one exploded on him
what's the best way to look up your family tree?
>look into family history
>may or may not have been cursed by Gypsys
How 2 feel?
>>451453
>look up family tree
>your great grandad shot and killed a black guy because he was stealing his chickens and watermelons from his farm
>>451496
I am related to Sir Isaac Brock.
Couple generations ago we'd be great enemies my southern neighbour.
>look really deep into family tree
>greatx12 grand uncle was a Viking named Skill Crusher
and they say white people don't have culture
>>451453
>my granddad was a big nob in the IRA during the Troubles and bought guns off Colonel Gaddafi
>my great granddad fought in the 1916 rebellion in Dublin against the British
>my other granddad was in the RAF in WWII and flew a Wellington bomber in the invasion of Sicily
And yet here I am shitposting on /his/
>>453291
Basically it turned out that it was already pretty well-documented by other persons, so it didn't require any effort from my side
>>452104
>>white ancestry is filled with thieves, murderers and arsonists
And also racemixers to boot.
>>452802
You must carry on their legacy
>Look up the family tree
>great grandfather was a war hero, writer and Social Democratic politician
>>454219
>Social Democratic politician
>Look up family tree
>Ancestor was captain of the Parliamentary Guard during the trial of King Charles I
>Poor bastard got hanged, drawn, and quartered as a regicide afterwards
>>454274
Yeah, he wasn't collaborating with nazis nor communists
>look up family tree
>long distant ancestor is a Dynasty Warriors character
Parts of family illegally entered from Canada after trying to sell guns back to Ireland
Ancestor died in 1903 in San francisco in a gunfight
Grandfather transfered off the u boat seawolf 2 weeks before it was depth charged with all crew lost
>be a teenage Americlap in South Carolina on a family vacation
>parents think it would be a fun idea to "learn about our heritage" by searching a genealogical database in the county my great-grandfather was from
>aid at the database center eagerly guides us to the relevant documents about our ancestors
>mom squints at paper
>"Hmm.. it says overseer here, but what's that word?"
>"uhhh... Negroes?"
>"yeah... overseer of Negros."
>mfw
>>454297
Also should add great grandmother escaped russia during the revolution because she was a ballerina that performed regularly and obviously the proles didn't like that
>look up family tree
>incestuous peasants all the way down
Such is life in Ukraine.
my first impression guess is this sounds like something a man with two wives would do to keep them from learning of each other.
i mean, yeah, maybe he was a career criminal or a secret agent or something, but dudes with two families used to be a lot more common than those options. identity was much more fluid before social security numbers, photo iDs and the like was in effect. a guy with a white collar income could more easily support two families back in the day. maybe your business demanded you split your time between two locations, travelling salesman, etc
>>451473
toppest of keks
>my grandparents were cousins
>>453812
>Sir Isaac Brock
i mean, Modest Mouse is cool and all, but the fans really do ride Brock's dick. "Sir"? c'mon.
>don't know shit about my family beyond Scottish-Dutch heritage on mother's side
>don't know shit about my father's side other than he's kinda swarthy
>and his dad left him like he left me
>so I probably shouldn't have a kid cause that sure as hell looks like a pattern to me
>>451517
>>451595
>>451494
I am 75% Irish and 25% Sicilian, and I'm American so I have no identity just subhuman genetics
What do
>>454309
Is that fucking Sam hyde
>>451453
>look at my family tree
>my grandfather was stationed in a extermination camp
I s-swear, he dindu nuffin!
>>454309
Top kek anon
>tfw descended from minor nobility
I can trace my family history up to 1066 lol
>be me
>absentee dad
>maternal grandparents have a few good family stories
>grammy's pop and uncles fought WW1 for Canada
>gramps was in Pacific in WW2, and he had a portrait of a Prussian general in uniform we're related to.
>nothing else we know, grammy's 1st gen Can/US, gramps 2nd gen
>reach out to dad's side in my 20s
>"Grandma, what are we?"
>German and English
>welp, that's exactly my mom's side, too.
>shrug.pdf
>then she shows me xeroxes of the family history her brother did
>direct Mayflower descent
>Revolutionaries later
>"Anon, if you ever have a daughter, she's eligible for the DAR"
>uh… OK
>three ship captains, full names and little bios
>branch of family in late 1800s is friendly with US senator and his wife
>Sen and wife can't have kids, ask if they can assume guardianship of teen daughter so sen wife can play mommy for a few years while they're in Washington DC
>excerpts of daughter's diary
>"We went to gala at the White House, Gen Grant and Sherman were chillin' "
nothing too earthshaking, but it was like i suddenly got a full, "real" history in a matter of minutes.
> Be 50% russian with maternal grandparents originating from St. Petersburg
>Have photos of my grandfather all in uniform standing in front of artillery, he looked pretty boss
>My grandmother was in the city and starved during the siege, she's a sweet old babushka now though, bless her heart
>Not pictured, My grandmother
>come from English family
>earliest ancestors in Europe were jewish diaspora
>>451517
No exceptions.
In the oven you go.
>>454594
Minor nobility here as well, but pretty recent. Ennobled in early 17th century.
>>451517
I had long curly hair that got frizzy when it was humid it looked full jew fro, plus a italian brow line that made my nose look bigger. I was super antisemetic my whole life because of it and I recently found out im 1/64 jew
>just put me in the oven senpai
>be a descendant of a king and a person from which the national anthem of my country is named
pretty lucky i guess
>>452723
>tfw descended from Hungarian nobility kicked out by revolutionaries after the disgusting Entente broke up Austria-Hungary
Fucking subhuman Anglo scum
>>455052
>1/64 jew
Jews lived in Berlin throughout the war and never were Auschwitzed
>both of my mother and fathers family comes from "Norrland" which is basically traditionally workers, gypsies, Sami and communists
>both of them worked their asses off
>we are now top 0.1% of the country (at least dad)
>dads siblings all did the same thing, his sister married a Hamilton
>mfw blue major nobility is mixing with gypsies
Hilarious
>Granddad was one of the ten richest men in Romania
>German diaspora
>Commies stole his land and his factory
>Leaves to Germany
I could live in a huge decadent villa but instead i just have an average house.
>>453653
There are sort of "detectives" that would do it for you.
>Don't even have to look up the family tree
>Surname is an archaic word for stilt walker
>Ancestors were OG carnies in central Europe, then Lutheran missionaries for some reason
>>455258
Nobility wasn't kicked out of A-H and there certainly wasn't no revolution. I'm descended from a Hungarian noble house as well.
>>455374
>Granddad was one of the ten richest men in Romania
What does that mean, he had his own bucket instead of being forced to shit in the street?
>turned out great-grandma's maiden name was Lee
>>455392
you should learn stilt walking, that would be tight.
there's a really good 3 point shooter for the Atlanta Hawks named Korver, which is German for "basket maker," kek.
>>455443
>It ain't Lee starts playing
>>451453
My last name is Isaac, despite being part spic. Guess I'm a filthy Jew as well. ;_;
>>452300
underrated post
How do you look up your family tree? My great Aunt made one when I was a baby, and it only goes back to 1701 when the first person of my family came to America.
>>451609
Hello, West Virginia.
>looked up my family tree
>great-great-great-grandfather was a Jewish tax collector
Circassian here whose ancestors were not lucky enough to be janissaries or a concubines in a sultan's harem. Instead, they stuck around just long enough for the Russians to kick their asses.
>Look up your family tree
>Your grandfather fought the British boxing champion
>didn't even train for the fight
>Look up great great great grandpa online.
>Wonder how he became a mayor.
>He genocided Catholic peasants and stole their property (maybe).
>Look up other great great great grandpa mayor.
>Same thing. One was a Colonel and another one of his Sergeants.
>I was a little kid playing Final Fantasy Tactics at the time.
>tfw I'm a Catholic.
I have no face or ellipses for this feel.
>>455676
Catholic Churches have fantastic records. They're just not yet digitized.
You could probably go back 200 years easily, so long as you are Latin.
>>455731
bad ass
>>455807
1701 is more than 200 years senpai
>>451453
>>451453
>Dad's side of the family kept extensive records of lineage and family records
>Basically get a family history lesson every time I visit
>Grandfather has a worn green book with gold filigree
>Surname and family crest on front
>Pages sometimes have pictures with info on the family member's life and something they did
>Apparently related to Ezra Cornell and a building with our surname still on campus
>Family's male members were mostly mid to high ranking officers in Canada and UK
>Keep going farther back
>Military ranks turn into titles of nobility
>Look at one of the oldest names on the list
>Richard coeur de Lion
>Mfw descended from the crusader king
>>452702
Maybe it's future you that went back in time
>>455730
had to look that up, bro.
are you still there, or diaspora? are the girls as hot as they say?
>>455731
>didn't even train for the fight
sounds like he lost
>>455786
harsh.
>I have no face or ellipses for this feel.
maybe pic related?
>>455842
sounds like this guy won the thread, and i'm not even a christian
>>451609
Who /farmers/ here?
>paternal great-grandfather deposed local pasha after the declaration of republic
>grand father was also brave. i've heard that he entered fights with crowds to protect what is his (sometimes guns were involved)
>my father and i inherit the same bravery
>mfw we don't value our lives for at least 4 generations
>look up family tree
>grandpa fought in WW2
>>456053
Ulster Scots dirt farmers, right back.
>Look up your family tree
>Your granddads were mass murdered
>>455730
Are you in Jordan now?
>>456040
>didn't even train for the fight
>sounds like he lost
Yes. But he was a bit busy stopping hitler at the time.
His Brigade suffered 90% casualty rates a few weeks beforehand.
Look up family tree.
Realize your family owned the families of the chimps in your college classes.
>related to Daniel Boone, The guy that built the church Tom Henry was supposedly buried under, and my ancestors were neighbors with Lincolns grandparents
Comfy
>look up family tree
>Granddad died in Auschwitz
>fell from guard-tower
>Related to Ataturk
> Great Grandad fought in WW1 for the Ottomans
>>451453
nigga my grandad was a rapist that raped an 11 yr old, that's how my dad came about.
>look up family tree
>can't follow maternal Grandmother's paternal side since three brothers did something, changed their names, and fled to California
>>451453
Hitler and William the Conqueror.
>have grandparents escape from North Korea during Korean War
>grandma has last name Kim
>tells self 'oh don't worry' Kim is the most common name it doesn't mean anything
>clan name...Jeonju, suspicious
>SHIT SHIT SHIT
>find out my grandmother is a distant cousin of Kim Il Sung from same village near Pyongyang
I'm going to seppuku, I don't want these shitty genes to pass
>>455643
Poe Dameron/Oscar...is that you?
>>456402
Do you look like a chubby potato?
telling people about your heritage is a bit like telling people about your dreams 2bh
>>455830
Oh, damn., you're right.
Gonna need a time machine or some captive lizard people.
>>456402
Holy fuck that's cool.
>Tfw everyone remarks on how much you curse like your grandfather.
>I know for my paterninal Grandpa that he fought in the pacific front as a marine and fight in Iwagima Okinawa and Nagaski.
>My maternal Grandpa was a paratrooper and fought on the italian front
>>454600
P.cool
>on my dad's side, descended from first Frenchman of my name to settle in Canada, off the first boat in 1608.
>were sisterfuckers in Beauce for 300 years, then moved to Western Quebec to be poor miners
Not sure about that feel.
>on my maternal grandfather's side, literally no clue past my great grandmother, because my grandfather was out of wedlock and she never told anyone the truth (now dead)
>the story is that he was a polish Doctor that escaped a concentration camp, fucked a young nurse, then left to live in Southern France.
And then my maternal grandmother's side are all near-Laplanders, with a glorious history of doing fuck-all.
>>456174
Nah, I'm in Southern California.
>mother's side is nothing but a long line of Anglo-Saxon peasants who have been farmers for God knows how many centuries
>father's side is just another Anglo-Saxon mother who married a half Irish guy who returned from Ireland after he hid there so he didn't have to fight in the first world war
>>455484
>I shall learn the noble trade of my ancestors!
>Please help, I've broken my coccyx
>>456678
>Hernan Cortes Ancestor
>Bloodthirsty "evil" pirate blood in me
>Born n raised American as fuck
>Pale/pasty complexion, no accent etc.
>Family known to overachieve, big time
Weird shit, cool I guess
>>451453
>born half-kurdish half-hungarian shitskin
>look up mother's family tree in 10th grade
>hungarian and habsburg noble families everywhere, rich family stories, people fought against Napoleon or fought in the 48-49 revolution, there are fucking hussars everywhere
>Great-grandad even know Horthy and fought in '56
>try to look up anything about my fathers family
>they are fucking everywhere, mainly in Iraq, but also in Iran, Turkey, fucking Netherlands
>no one knows jackshit
>grandad was turkish, grandma kurdish
>after some hardcore search it turns put my great-grandpa served in the english military as a fucking toilet-cleaner, and my grandma, without irony, was probably bought for 3 camels to my grandpa
I dunno what to think.
are all these "I'm descended from X/Y/Z famous person" posts from americans?
>>452723
>I am nobility
You're not though lol
>>457070
yes
>>454326
my god the women though.
>>451557
jij ook al?
great grandfather was the govenor of Dutch-Borneo, but he got sentenced to death by japs
>>457227
>surrendering
>>457053
>Habsburg noble families
You descend from Habsburgs? Are you that autismal tripfag from /int/ or just making shit up?
>>457256
I meant friends with the Habsburg, I just typed fast.
I meant noble austrian family.
>>457299
Which Hungarian house by the way? Do you know their titles too?
>look up family tree
>descended from finns farming the same bad lappish soil for 500 years
>be beaner
>look up family tree
>can't find it
>turn out to be bastard mestizo descendent of some Spanish guy
>>452802
>they all won medals
>...they were all mess cooks
They must have been really good cooks
>>451453
>grandfather fought Germans as a partisan in WW2
>great-grandfather fought Italians in WW1 and died in a military hospital of some disease
>countless (distant and not-so-distant) relatives who died in WW1, both in the west and the east
>one guy died at Custoza in 1866
>around 30 relatives died in a huge fire in 1811 that burned down half of the nearby town
>a couple of relatives who died on the partisan side and a couple who died on the side of the home guard
I still have my great-grandfather's last letter that he had written (he couldn't write so someone else did it for him) a day before his death.
>>453294
don't worry senpai.
yuropoors peasants have the same exact problem.
>>451496
>Declaration of Independence
Literally the most homosexual document in history, except for the US Constitution.
>>452736
Jesus.
>>454518
Join the Mafia
>>455842
DEUS VULT
E
U
S
V
U
L
T
>>452702
Could've been just an escaped criminal who changed his identity. Easily doable and pretty common back in the day.
>>456219
>>451453
>look up family tree
>goes back to 1527
>in 1527 the church that contained the family birth register was looted and burned down to the ground
>apparently by my family and friends
>we been actually under church ban by the pope himself for this
>>452802
An army with no cook is useless
>>453294
In middle eastern, I don't even know my great grandpa's name.
>>451453
>Dig up family tree for schoolwork
>there's a new law that allows children and/or grandchildren of Spanish and/or Italians to have double/triple citizenship
>perfect because just found out Grandpa on father's side never argentinized, unlike my maternal grandparents
>more severe digging for the paperwork
>turns out Grandpa's parents were Portuguese
>this almost cost us the citizenship
>have to go to Portuguese Embassy for some papers claiming how he never was a Portuguese Citizen
>Ditto to say he was never Argentinian
My mom doesn't have the best memory and I have no idea how to look up my family tree. Probably just a bunch of dirt farmers from Ireland before moving to 'murica.
>Raised up to appreciate my muh Italian heritage because mother was born in Naples
>Mom's cousin hires a genealogist
>Turns out her family is descended from some minor Spanish noble family
Welp, out with the spaghetti in with the paella.
>tfw no family tree
>tfw i have no idea who my ancestors were
Does anyone have suggestions for the family tree websites? I'm thinking about using ancestry.
>>458082
Geni is great because you can connect your family tree to other family trees on the website if you have common relatives. It doesn't allow you to download a GEDCOM, though.
I usually use Family Echo to put in the people and then download the GEDCOM and make a chart in Gramps.
>>458140
Good info, thanks.
One great great grandfather used to rub elbows with the czar.
Sadly family lost fortune after nationalization of assets.
LIBERATED . org
>look at family tree
>picking up chicks with a canon during 1864
>conscripted into German army and navy during ww1 despite being Danish
>POW on the eastern front after being overrun by cossacks
>work camps in ural mountains
>Walk barefoot from ural mountains to Poland
>kill polish farmer and taking his boots
>continue walking home to Denmark
>other guy fought in the battle of jutland
>Stealing from churches during ww2
>joining waffen SS during ww2
>deserting from the eastern front
>getting imprisoned
>escaping prison
>getting improsined again
>escaping again
>join FFL
>never heard from since
>look up my family tree
>such rich history, nobility and riches
>though much was lost your family holds alot of historic value
>realize that you're a fucking loser and will amount to nothing
>tfw your lineage ends with you
>>455705
>Great-grandfather was Jewish economist
>have no family history
>closest can get to a family tree is the slave trade receipts from the early 1700s
>probably came from some West African spearchucker
>accidentally fall asleep on a history book once
>wake up on a page with some black dude with pyramids in the background
WE
>quick look into very well preserved family tree
>lots of nobility from France and Italy, mostly cool people
>find out I'm a direct descendant from link related
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacques_Cazotte
He most definitely made a pact with Satan, didn't he? Shit creeped me out.
>>458215
I know you're trolling but this some heavy feels for us black folk.
>people talking about how they are the descendants of nobility, artisans, etc
>tfw even if you know your family history, it wouldn't be as interesting because Africa.
>>457431
Scandinavia?
>>458266
Sub Saharan kingdoms existed
That's something I never understood about these we wuz king people--rather than trying to uncover their actual history, they decide to make other's their own.
>look up family tree
>great great grandfather was a dock worker
>it was riveting
>>458276
You see, that's the thing: They don't know about that stuff.
I'm glad I do.
>granddad was a German soldier, survived the Russian winter as POW, went on to become a mechanic, made tools for his own use that were bought by big companies later because they nifty tools
>dad was a taekwondo master who crushed schools until there were none left, just like my Mangas
>I just sit on my ass and play video games
I'm a disgrace to my heritage
>>454518
Go home and get your shinebox.
>>451453
If it was nigs or jews then that's something to be proud of
>look up my family tree
>see there's a nigger there
>proceed to get my shotgun and blow his brains out
>>452634
I was expecting that too but I found some folks were Danish and some Germans.
who /basednaziheritage/ here?
My grandad and great-grandad on the other side fought on opposing sides in the north african campaign
>look up family tree
>maternal side is prominent yangban family from southeast Korea, various scholars and officials
>paternal side is military officials and bureaucrats from northwestern Korea, some generals here and there
>my family group are poorfags in America today
>I'm a high school dropout and hikkikomori
Oh, how the migty have fallen
>>455842
>>456040
>>457671
>tfw Big Papa Richard will never teach you how to remove Kebab
Also have a story about my Great Grandfather and uncle during the first World War
>GG is a Major in the Scots Guard, his younger brother is a Lt. in the Canadian Expeditionary Force
>Both fought at the Somme
>GG leads several charges over the top to push back the German line
>Takes a bullet and some shrapnel in the side during one of the assaults
>Loses consciousness, then wakes up alone in a dug out
>German junior officer finds him
>German was separated from his battalion during the night
>Neither one knows where their battle lines are at that moment
>German gives GG basic first-aid so he doesn't bleed out
>GG thinks he's the German's POW now but it beats dying alone in a trench
>Apparently they were near a railway and find one of those handcars
>German cranks the trolley by himself since GG is too wounded
>German tries to make conversation in basic English to keep GG conscious
>Eventually they find one of the forward lines and are stopped by a patrol
>They're British Expeditionary Force and immediately rush my GG to a triage station
>German is taken as a POW and was going to be sent straight to a camp
>GG refuses to accept medical treatment until the German (who is also wounded) is seen to first
>Tells the men he'd be another cold body out in the mud if the young kraut hadn't found him
>Won't be argued with and reminds them this is a direct command from a superior officer
>GG pulls some strings with the local Brigadier and German receives same treatment as a British officer
>GG's wound is infected and is being sent to a hospital in Paris
>>458429
>>458429
>Before he's put on the train, German requests to speak with him
>Expresses his gratitude to GG and gives him his Pickelhaube helmet since he lost his sword (which was normally ceremonially 'given' by a surrendering/defeated officer)
>GG wrote about how humbled he was by the honor, stoicism and valor displayed by this German officer who was roughly half his age
>They exchanged salutes and prayers for each other's wellbeing and went their separate ways
>GG was kept in Paris for the rest of the war
>Later moved to Halifax with the rest of the family and started a shipping company
>One of his only regrets was never knowing what happened to the German officer who saved his life
>Hoped he had lived through the war, but knew he probably fell after being exchanged back to Germany
Last time I checked, my grandmother still had the helmet in my grandfather's study. Pic related is almost exactly what it looks like, which gives me a nagging feeling seeing above pic was from an auction roughly 4 years after my grandfather passed away. If I find out my family sold it I might just go berserk
Also, as for my great uncle
>Fighting at the Somme
>German grenade tumbles into his trench
>Throws himself on top of it, shielding the 9 other men around him from the worst of it
>Died at 23
>Still have the shattered pieces of his Webley .445
>>457459
how did hispanics even go about looking up their ancestry?
>Look up family tree
>Every single ancestor I can locate on my mother's side has an English surname, going back to the 17th century and including Patrick "Give me liberty or give me death" Henry and Nathaniel Hawthorne
>Every surname on my maternal Grandmother's side is English, going back to the 17th century and including a Revolutionary War vet
>Every surname on my father's side except two are English and the others are French, going back to the 18th century
Feels white, man.
What's the oldest document of your paternal grandparents you could find?
>>458352
I get that, but you'd think with the amount of time they browse "real history" websites and researching illuminati khazar edomite cracker conspiracies, theyd stumble upon *actual* black history.
>>458433
good story.
>look up family tree
>distantly related to the nazi prime minster of Norway
I wish I could be related to a well known nazi that everyone would know as soon as I said his name.
>look up family tree
>find a habsburg
>tfw I have all of habsburgs traits too except mental retardation
>>451517
/pol/ confirmed for literal children
>>454937
Back of robed aristocracy
My ancestors earned their privileges with rope and sword
>tfw 10 unbroken generations of Williams
>paternal side of family said to descend from prominent rabbis in Spain scattered to Central Europe by the Inquisition
>one family member built a synagogue in Prague that still stands to this day
>fast forward 300/400 years, some came to the USA, have my grandfather
>grandfather marries grandmother, she is a Russian Jew and her family escaped to America sometime before the October Revolution
>he worked for an electronics firm because he was a math wiz, she did lots of work for the civil rights movement and other causes
>maternal side, grandmother's family is Anglo-Norman and can trace their nobility back to before 1066 but have nothing to show for it (probably because they were old-school Cavaliers who came to the New World after they backed the wrong side in the English Civil War)
>grandfather's parents were Scottish Protestant man and Irish Catholic woman, the man had to renounce his faith and become Catholic in order to marry the love of his life and was shunned for it by his family
>grandmother teaches and eventually is principal of Catholic school, grandfather works in film industry after leaving the navy doing photography for them by airplane
>tfw your family is from all over the place
>tfw you celebrate Christmas and Hanukkah each year with the different sides and have all sorts of different little cultural oddities tucked away in your family traditions
Feels cool, man.
>>457646
>US Constitution
You misspelled "my birth certificate"
>ancestors came over to Britain with the Normans
>Own castles up and down the country
>Massacre some Welsh people
>directly related to William the Conquerer
>>451453
>Look up family tree
>Related to one Spanish mayor who, with some other guys, started the Independance War against the French
I didn't even ask for this FREEDOM
>>459036
Rekt
>Family tree
>Maternal granddad and grandma are 100% Irish and Swedish respectively
>Paternal side of family is a vague mixture of French-Canadian, Irish, a little German, and possibly a little Jewish
>tfw my lineage is simultaneously dull and unpalatable to /his/
Well, even if they didn't find that Jewish smidgen, they would have thrown me in the ovens over something else I'm sure.
>>458965
I was 16 ;_; I didn't know any better
If it makes any difference the only time I go on /pol/ is to blow stormcucks the fuck out nowadays
>>457431
The US is 3% Jewish and many more people are not Jewish but have some Jewish ancestry
Myself included
>Grandfather's family were Germans who changed their name and pretended to be English
>Grandmother's family were Jews who pretended to be Syrian Catholics
>Other grandmother's family were ethnic Scandinavians who assimilated into Irish culture and adopted a common name
I'm from a long lineage of charlatans :^)
>>459668
>>Other grandmother's family were ethnic Scandinavians who assimilated into Irish culture and adopted a common name
Want to tell me a little more? I'm Irish and wondering why they'd give up their surname while in Ireland. Were they fleeing WW2 or something?
>>451453
>Look up your family tree
>Most of them were lost in the genocide
>>454309
the thin black girl is adorable
I wonder if she's dating the white dude
>>456402
You could be NK royalty living it up right now
>>457684
the absolute madman
>>458266
>some heavy feels for us black folk.
Dude. Try being Asian or Indian. Your family would be generations of farmers and rarely is anyone ever descended from any person of great status.
>Be Jewish
>Do some research
>Great great grandparents on mom's side converted to Lutheranism in Germany, before moving to the US in the 1870s and raising their kids as Jews
>Find out that great great grandmother was just a Christian German, not Jewish at all
If an Orthodox Rabbi finds out this would mean I'm not technically Jewish
fucking hell
>>459672
Nah. They were Scottish but had a Scandinavian name. My great-great grandmother was born in Norway.
They moved to Ireland from Galloway in the 19th century and changed their name.
>>459703
Most groups view religion as completely independent from race.
>>459699
Power and intellect outranks outrageous numbers. Japs and gooks are doing pretty well, along with the financial nobility of China.
As I expected, looking into my family history last year was a big jumbled mix of Jews, ethnic Russians, and Tatars
>>459755
Judaism is matrilineal m8
>>451453
>looks at family tree
>dads side
>curry
>landlords, generals, and a few astronomers and astrophysicists along with some mobsters on my gramp's side
>great great great grandpapy shot a british officer in the face for being a cunt and disrespecting him
>caused a rebellion
>moms side
>100% 'murican
>own and farm a mountain in Virginia
>dixies
>direct descendants of Priscilla Mullins
>miners, farmers, soldiers and doctors
>me
>live in MI (MICHIGAN MICHIGAN MICHIGAN)
>dad does IT
>in Uni
Pretty happy desu
>>452790
Ktfb, barzinski/burzinski
I had a grand grandmother who after her husband died ( she had 3 children, including my grandmother) a man, who was a known to the family and lost his wife recently, entered my grand grandmother's house with a shotgun demanding for her to became his wife... And she did, for 30 years, she could have gone to the police anytime...
The man had already children and they were favoured more than my grandmother and her brother and sister.
>>459034
If the rabbis were from Portugal and you can proove it, you can ask for nationality.
A law came out last year like it is some apology to the the jews expelled during the inquisition.
>>456486
they all look like that desu
>>459755
It astounds me that this day in age people still don't know Jews are an ethnoreligious group
>>456053
Dirt farmers all the way back to the 1700's here.
Some documents even prove that the family was dirt farmers all the way back to the 1400's.
>>455412
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Terror_(Hungary)
One of my ancestors kidnapped a girl he believed was in love with him. He was wrong as it turned out and was sent to gaol.
Great grandfather was a pilot in the Imperial Russian Air Service during WWI. When the civil war broke out he sided with the commies and became a cavalryman, because the Red Guard didn`t have any planes at the start of the war. Was mostly occupied with massacring peasants who dared to rebell against the bolsheviks. Apparently he was so good at it, that they made him major general.
>>458386
i keked
>>457679
Well, considering the time and political situation of my country back then, he could probably be Italian, Chinese, Polish, non Catholic or Jew, and he hide his identity with another name and stuff like that. Then again, thats my hypothesis.
>>454432
>>454326
>>454326
Incest and marrying your cousins is common practice throughout history. Studies have shown that marrying and fucking your first cousin has no genetic downsides. How do you think humans populated the planet? They fucked other species of humans such as neanderthal but they bred with other homo-sapiens. In Africa, Middle East, and Latin America marrying your cousins is common practice.
>>456402
Top fucking Kek. You can believe that the North Koreans know your family. The kims track all their blood related relatives so they can see who left and who didn't. NK treats those who are related to kim like royalty. Just like the Saudis do to their own.
>Burned at the stake for heresy or imprisoned for years on end in 1600's Switzerland/Southern Germany area
>fuck this
>move to England then take the firstboats available for the Pennsylvania colony
Such is the life of a Mennonite
>>460586
>In Africa, Middle East, and Latin America marrying your cousins is common practice.
That explains why they're still third world shitholes then.
>>460586
>no genetic downsides
There can be genetic defects in highly unrelated people from regressive genes too
>>460675
*recessive
>>460675
Well copying humans a lot of times creates bugs in the system. We fucked each other so many times and reproduce billions that the genetic issues started to show more frequently. We're breeding ourselves to death.
>>460670
Its still common in Europe and America. Small towns are common in the developed world. Your family has a lot of cousin fuckers.
>>451453
>asked about family history
>don't know shit, decide to search
>late 1990s, still manual searches but some online
>see tree going back to Henry III
>bullshit.jpg
>tell relatives, they go apeshit
>b-but this is bullshit!
>we'z royal nao
Some Americans are really serious about this. I got them to shut up when I disproved a couple four generations back, much less 14.
>be kid, ask about family
>told scotch-irish and creole
>explained that have black and american indian ancestors
>k, no shits given
>years later get genetic test
>100% Northern European
>tell father who is now convinced it was a mean lie told by a brother
>black kinky hair explained by scottish ancestors
>cancel subscription to Jet
Any anons actually interested in this, go to familysearch.org.
My family has been traced back to Prince Madoc of Wales; who supposedly sailed to North America in 1170.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madoc
>>460000
Quads duly checked.
All we've got for it is family legend, really; there might be documentation for it, but I'm not sure. The people my family claims that far in the past had a different last name, and were from northern-ish Spain and the first to get the boot when things turned bad for the Jews there. But Spain did the same thing as Portugal a few years ago, I think, but I don't plan on living there so I don't know if I could do it in good conscious.
>look up your family tree
>it ends with your grandparents on one side and great-grandparents on the other because they were all orphans, lost records, don't know anything or maybe were alyums i dunno
>>460881
>dont look up family tree
>certain im related to squint eyed horse eating rapists
>look up family tree
>all my great grandfathers were red army deserters
On my mother's side, can trace ancestry to the Norman invasions. On my father', to nutty Ocitians from southern France that happen to have some Greek mixed in.
>>459755
Jews are a religion, a nation, and a culture
As a nation, "Jewish citizenship" is requisite on either formal declaration or maternal descent. Somebody like Bob Dylan, who converts to Christianity, is still Jewish because his mother was a Jew.
A person could be born to a Rabbi and a Christian woman and raised Jewish, but if they don't formally declare their Judaism in accordance to the Halacha, by Orthodox rules they aren't Jewish.
Judaism doesn't prostyltize, but because a lot of people who are raised as Jewish are not technically Jewish, most rabbis now believe it's okay to encourage non-Jews of Jewish descent to convert.
>>460367
lol was she your ancestor, too?
>great-grandparents had a Frank Lloyd Wright house
>there's a door with marks for how tall my dad and uncles were growing up
>other great-grandparents on fathers side have family records going back across the Atlantic to Norway, and back a bit there
>mother's side paternal great-grandfather was a US calvary officer
Feels good
>>462569
>great-grandparents had a Frank Lloyd Wright house
>had
What happened?
>look up family tree
>go back pretty far
>suddenly someone tells me to hol up
>WE WUZ KINGZ AND SHEEIT
