What does /g/ think of Amazon's dash buttons? Is this the future?
>>53788755
what?
>>53788767
They are buttons connected to WiFi that reorder the specific product from amazon when you press it.
I got one today for literally slim Jim's for shots and giggles. However, for toilet paper and shit like that it would be pretty useful.
>>53788755
>kid gets to it
>presses the button a lot thinking it's some toy
>gets bored and puts it away without telling
>a week alter you find out your bank balance is in the negatives
>theres also 100's of dragon dildos on your doorstep
Sounds fun tbqh
>>53788755
Are you australian by any chance?
I thought there would just be an app with buttons on it
Maybe that would make people less likely to use it for some stupid reason I don't know
>>53788755
>feeling hungry
>better get some fucking doritos!
>press the button
>wait 3 fucking days for doritos
or
leave basement and walk to the store
how hard is that?
>>53788918
>theres also 100's of dragon dildos on your doorstep
>having dragon dildos on quick reorder
Do you fucking lose them all in your ass or something, that you have to constantly order them???
<relevant
> You have to pay five dollars to order shit from your toilet
You guys aware this is how Rome ended, right?
only for people who believe they are STILL too busy even after using tech to "make their lives easier"
>>53789078
>not having dragon dildos on quick reorder
You some kinda queer?
They look like those dog clickers
>>53788957
>leave basement and walk to the store
>how hard is that?
Harder than you'd think
I bought ones for trash bags, toilet paper and laundry detergent. I don't think I'd use the ones for food or anything but it's good for staple products. Prices seem to be about the same online as they are at the store, slightly cheaper.
>>53789144
>Not not having dragon dildos on quick reorder
No, I'm just a responsible faggot that doesn't swallow dragon dildos with my ass, thanks.
Why has American society shifted towards constantly staying in ones home?
I am not just pointing out the obvious here; obviously on the whole Americans have been making this shift for quite awhile.
There is just something extra strange about these buttons.
We have super markets, with products stocked to the ceiling, that for the majority of Americans are less than 5 minutes away.
So why exactly are these buttons being created?
Is the end goal of corporate America that we are all sedentary and wait around for everything in our lives to be delivered by Amazon™ drones to bring us our #Doritos™???
Is the goal to make it so everyone is kept in an entertainment filled pen and we just pay for every tiny thing in our lives with United States Funbucks???
Where do we halt consumerism in order to preserve a society at large?
Are we even a society if we are no longer required to be social?
Do they have a button for those 55 gallon drums of water-based lube?
>>53788755
Spam the RedBull button
>>53788755
These are retarded.
You are making a button for a certain product. The only way it would be ok is it was the drone delivering condoms to me in a pinch.
>>53788957
They are trying to move into quick delivery like 30 mins to an hour.
Around the chicago suburbs they still use ups and fed ex for some shit but the common orders that come from the local warehouse are being delivered by a amazon van.
The whole thing has me thinking they want to be delivering your daily needs on a quick model.
should've just implemented a favorites list with one click buy in their app
They exist because they foster brand loyalty.
I don't know what brand of toilet paper I buy, I switch it around a little so my asshole doesn't get bored.
Same with most people for staples. They just buy whatever, if somethings on sale, or something else catches your eye. No one really carers, so no one really buys the same thing over and over again. Everyone shits, but I don't think any toilet paper company is bigger than samsung. But why not? A global toilet paper company, that sells to every country in the world (except india) is completely possible, proving people had enough reason to buy that brand over another one.
This is just a trick to remove competition from the market, don't fall for it.
>>53789199
i just ordered chinese delivery xD
>>53788918
You can only order one at a time until you previous order is delivered
They're fucking retarded, and so is anybody who uses them.
>>53789118
The 5 dollars is taken off of your first order basically paying for itself
>>53789384
>(except india)
kek
I feel like if you lived in an area with amazon drones it would be cool pushing a button and food showing up 2 hours later.
But it could just as easily be a phone app couldn't it?
>>53788787
>Connecting to the website is too complicated for my average tech knowledge. Better use a wireless device that has my password and credentials embedded.
>>53789215
Are you greasing tractor trailer hitches? Why do you need express delivery of 55 fucking gallons of lubricant?
>>53789808
Oh, I think you know ;)
What possible use could the condom button be if it's not going to arrive for 2 days?
>>53789270
This would be amazing. You can get a job being sysadmin online and have all your needs met cause amazon delivers them. Never leave the house!
>>53789384
Try out wet wipes to wipe your butt man. Trust me, do it. It's AMAZING! Once you tried it you can't go back to regular toilet paper for your daily wiping needs without thinking about how awesome wet wipes are.
>>53789945
Oh I have, but I still use TP.
First I scoop out all the fudge still on my ass with tp, then I get clean with wet wipes, then I dry the area up by dapping tp gently around
how is this easier than just saving your previous orders on amazon and clicking order?
>ordering bulk of junk food and condoms
seriously...
>>53789906
I guess some people schedule their coitus.
>ordering redbull in large quantities
Kek, only in burgerland
>>53788755
Is there a chicken and broccoli button or is it all Jewish meme products?
>>53790002
I think early death via blood borne ailment like stroke or cardiac arrest is trendy in the States. I can't fathom why else attitudes towards morbid obesity and stimulant abuse are so lax.
>>53790054
better than making a trend out being killed by ISIS bombings.
>>53790054
>blood borne ailment like stroke or cardiac arrest
>>53789991
>how is this easier than just saving your previous orders on amazon and clicking order?
This. Why does amazon need to shit out a new memeware gadget every now and then?
I mean, you need to confirm orders ON YOUR PHONE anyway. This doesn't really help.
Also, isn't "le internet of things" going to replace these buttons when your fridge can tell you're running low on milk or your gamer desk can tell you need more cheetos and red bull?
>>53789749
I think you'll make more impulsive buy with a button.
>>53789710
If by "pays for itself" you mean "part of the cost of the extra shit you're buying" then yes.
>>53790251
That culture may crop up in a while for a while, but if/when the delivery time gets short enough, people will just use it as another pantry or as a refrigerator replacement. At that point, there's the potential for savings.
>>53789963
Ah, I used to use the wet wipe first cause i could get it in 1-2 swipes and then use the tp to dry. I can't use wet wipes now till I get more money. Too poor. I still think of the days where I had wet wipes tho.
>>53790392
Amazon is gonna start charging more cause they are gonna have to hire drivers. Or replace them with drones and have a small team of technicians that fix them.
They're fun to hack.
They're not worthwhile if used as intended.
>>53788755
e-waste
>>53790562
If the shipment times are low enough, they would have to be drones. FAA pls.
>shit no more toilet paper and my ass is dirty
>better order some and get it with overnight(tm) shipping
What the fuck? This is such a waste of hardware, why can't they just add a homescreen widget to the amazon phone app? Or is that not convenient enough for fat americucks?
>>53790637
>dash_button_CP
MODS
>>53789199
When people talk, they exchange information.
That lets them educate themselves and learn that all their advertisement is bad.
They want to control every last bit of our lives because only then, will their precious consumer based economic models actually work.
Also, public spaces cost money.
Unless we are willing to foot the bill for more expensive goods, and travel to the mall regularly, public spaces will die.
>>53790674
muh IoT
>>53789808
Water-based lube mate, it has a different purpose
>>53789787
The point is to put it in your pantry, and when you run out of whatever item, you just press it and it comes to your door the next day. It's nifty for larger families, that's about it.
>>53789186
>not wearing it out in one session
Are you even trying?
>>53790691
>Don't like something? Don't like™ it and you won't see any more of it in the future.
>Looking for information that agrees with your past searches? Welcome to your search engine.
>Want to express something to somebody? Share a meme image pre-made by one of our content publishers on your app.
Fuck, I hate to think what kind of communication we'll be having in 20 years.
>>53788755
I want to ironically put a doritos and mountain dew one on my xbox
>>53790513
>tfw swipe most shit off my ass on first ark, after which I just use the bidet
DESU the first step in completely unnecessary and I could live without using almost any TP if I wanted
>>53790771
How do you wear out a non-mechanized dildo, exactly?
>>53790872
vagina dentata, except with the asshole instead
You pay 5$ for that ? Wow, i guess every home will have 5-10 of them till they realize that they wasted 25-50$ to order less than 5 times each product .
>>53788755
Seems like it would be too easy to spend money you wouldn't otherwise spend with something like this. You just push a button and get the product, without thinking about the cost.
>>53790733
this niggah knows
>>53789787
afaik this isn't quite how it works. I think you set them up with the app on your phone and it communicates using high frequency sounds (to configure).
I would assume it either creates a token to make orders or it just tells your phone to order it for you.
The idea is basically that if you just leave it, say, in the cupboard or wherever, when you are running out of something, you just press the button and can reorder it.
Sure, opening an app, typing a product name and pressing the 1-click buy button isn't exactly hard but i guess the novelty/convenience is neat.
Can i get one for whores?
>>53788755
The existence of them would've been great 20 years ago, but today people carry around a device that can order things off amazon almost as easily and without the limitations of products or quantity.
And let's face it, if you're at the point in your life where you need a doritos button you're not ordering one bag.
>>53788755
Should be useful when you need ammo.
>>53788755
Seems stupid to make a ton of different buttons for different products. Why not just an app that can scan a bar code and reorder whatever?
>>53788957
>>press the button
>>wait 3 fucking days
You genuinely don't know or are you just pretending to?
>>53790611
>>53790562
Drivers are hired as independent contractors, I've used the prime now service about three times now, some things cost more than in store, but most have the same price, delivery fee is $5 for two hour deliver.
>>53790637
>get it with overnight
see>>53792014
>>53792118
Also when I say prime now, I mean the phone app that lets you order basic supplies, I don't mean the retarded clickers that you stick to the wall.
>>53789199
Soon America will be like the People in the Spaceship in Wall-E
>>53788755
>2016
>still no bar code scanners in our trash bins for easy re-order.
This seems awkward.
What do you get? 1 bag of Doritos? I'd kill myself if I was a mail man. Delivering Doritos to thousand of people...
>>53789199
muh social anxiety
>>53792266
Lets make a Dorito Delivery Company and live the American Dream
>>53790734
That's the stupidest idea i've ever heard.
The future is here you dorito hating plebs!
>>53788755
I really love those Dash buttons. They make ordering supplies 20% faster.
>>53794846
Fuck you for making that joke
>>53790734
What if a little kid just comes and presses the button multiple times or whatever.
>>53788755
>mfw I sit on the Trojan button and end up with a pallet delivered to my front door.
>>53795343
It only adds to your shopping cart, you still have to complete the order, and its function deactivates until delivery.
>>53791958
Because regular people don't carry their phones everywhere in the house. Sure they can go run and grab the phone, but then they may as well just go to the computer.
And the bar code may not always be available, it may have been clipped for a mail-in offer, there might be a master bar code for the bundle, but not the individual items inside.
>>53792188
>will be
It's a documentary
>>53789945
Aren't those bad to flush?
>>53790637
>d
> be eurofag
> press one of these buttons
> wait 3 weeks for the item to arrive with super high shipping fee
>>53789787
Bro everything uses tokens these days. These tokens aren't allowed to do anything but order one product, and only when none of that product is shipping to you at the moment
>>53795604
very bad for the sewage treatment plants.
>>53788957
>leave basement
>>53788957
>want doritos
>press doritos button
>in 10 minutes, Amazon delivery drone is outside your window with doritos
>in one second drone's camera transmits back to headquarters video of you in your underwear waddling over to pick up your doritos.
IT'S LIKE FUCKING LIVING IN SPACE!
>>53790866
How do you dry your ass?
>>53788787
what a fucking gimmick
>>53788787
Why the fuck?
Who is going to use this shit?
>some dickhead goes to your house
>presses the button 9000 times
>>53788918
sounds like a /g/ood time
I'd buy a few just to hack and play around with. They're not too hard to reprogram. The hardest part is setting program up to not run constantly and eat the battery. I don't know about you but I've got more than a few uses for a button I can pocket that lives on my network at home.
>>53793062
It stops the weekly grocery trips to Sam's clubs.
>>53789078
>>53788755
>too busy shop for theirselves
>wealthy enough to pay a 30-40% premium on basic items
>not wealthy enough to delegate shopping to an assistant
This is their market. Just how big could it be, really?
>>53798011
It has an option to disable ordering until the prevoius one arrives
>>53790637
Are Tide pods worth it /g/?
>>53788957
>3 days
10-minute drone deliveries, when?
This is clearly made for 600lb bed-bound Americans.
>I can't even use 1-click ordering on a phone app
>Much more time saving to slap a dedicated button
At first the concept seems cool, but the more I think about, the more fucking stupid it becomes.
>>53788755
American Laziness at it's finest.
That's why you rights are taken away by the jews.
pls
>>53798656
hahaaa
>>53798656
win
>>53788755
They are the most gimmicky, stupid piece of commercial tech since the CueCat
>>53798476
I use them. It's really convenient to just toss one in with a load.
>>53798656
You could wire it up to those asian mail order bride sites.
I wonder if they have an API.
Fucking capitalist scum
>>53789199
Americans hate each other.
I know because I'm American and I hate every one of you fuckos
>>53800204
Move to North Korea if customer choice triggers you so much.
>>53798656
>>53798656
>>53798107
Data kill switch. Place several around the house. If the feds show up banging on your door, hit one and your computer immediately starts deleting all your cp.
>condom
Yes, good goy! Reproduction is for savages and primitives
>>53789199
They're buttons designed to get people to buy more things. There's no secret conspiracy other than making it possible for people to buy more shit they don't need.
Now as for as that shit being good for you or not, they don't care. There's no conpiracy to feed you shit, they just sell you what you buy.
>>53795482
>It only adds to your shopping cart, you still have to complete the order, and its function deactivates until delivery.
Then what's the fucking point then? I thought this was for lazy cunts but it would still have a purpose. What is even the point f you have to go confirm it on your phone/computer?
>>53800182
fund it
>>53803117
to prevent this >>53795343
When you're running low on laundry detergent, you don't think, I'd better run to the computer and order more. You just think "mental note, buy detergent." Then you fucking forget that 5 minutes later.
>>53803259
Ah so they don't only want to atrophiate the legs of americans, they want to kill their ability to memorize things.
They're useless shit but the underlying hardware can be repurposed for fun things.
>>53803259
So much for walking over to the grocery list and jotting it down
>>53803301
>atrophiate the legs
Why would it do that?
>>53803541
Same thing. Most people would not interrupt what they were doing to update a shopping list. Only time they would stop and do that is if they discovered they were out of the needed item.
>>53788755
This is the future of neckbeard basement dwellers.
