>>53751145
senior full stack developer here and can confirm 99% of the list is false and fake

> describes a terrible web developer
> everyone must be bad and terrible like the people I know

l2code instead of eating jelly in your basement :)

been seeing a lot of these threads lately. did a webdev fuck your dakimakura, anon?

>>53751168
Not even him, but that was clearly sarcasm.
>hurr just pretending to be retarded
He wasn't trying to fool anyone.

>>53751168
> full stack developer
knows a bit about everything, not much about anything. recognizes himself in OP's description.

> 99% of a list of 14 items.
great math skills, too.

>>53751145
>don't mention or think about security at all.

Well done OP by omitting this you made it even more clear how hard shitty webdevs don't think about security.
10/10 post, would read again.

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>>53751168

>>53751168
So mister full stack developer can you tell me how a login CSRF works and how to mitigate it successfully?

Honestly curious.

>>53751262
just generate a code on your page / wherever you want and stick it to a cookie / memory to be sent everytime you're logged in so you wont get cross requests by /g/ NEETS wannabe hackers

any more questions?

>>53751230
wow. you got your point.


you guys are funny :) go on!

>>53751145
>> have no fucking clue how HTTP works. it's only *the* protocol of the web, so it's probably not that important.
I honestly studied it years ago and never had to use that knowledge anymore, so what's your point? http2 incoming anyway
>> know absolutely nothing about low-level programming.
false and subjective to experience. Why would someone learn low level when they have clearly decided they want to devleop in high level languages? if you answer efficency you're beyond ridicolous and I won't argue any more
>> know close to absolutely nothing about programming in general.
obviously false
>> rely solely on frameworks written in meme languages built of layers upon layers upon layers of abstraction. if generating a "hello world" response requires less than 15MB or takes less than 600ms, you need more layers; switch to this week's hip framework for code artisans.
yeah, no. Anyway frameworks should ease your life as you are not supposed to reinvent the wheel (you know, what you guys do every day apparently). if you pick the right one you'll get zero to none bloat and immediate reponses.

>>53751500
>> have no clue how to design a properly normalized relational database or how to query it. rely on your framework's ORM, pretending business objects map to database tables 1:1. if they don't, denormalize even more.
false, I've used oracle pl/sql postgres mysql and more
>> actually, fuck relational databases. they've been around for 40+ years which is probably a bad thing. jump on the NoSQL/MongoloidDB meme bandwagon.
false, also saying nosql is a meme means you don't know a fuck about programming :)
>> your site shouldn't be able to handle more than 10 parallel requests without Amazon AWS and Cloudflare. to compromise your users' privacy even further, don't forget to throw in Google Analytics.
enterprises don't uses google analytics, I was actually building the analytics pipeline for the one I work for. We use 4 instances of 512mb on heroku to handle 5+ million users/month so don't be too jelly.
>> when in doubt, copy-paste from StackOverflow without understanding.
retard statement

>>53751513
>Client-side:
>> use a CSS framework. be sure to make clients download all 2500 CSS rules, even if you only use 5.
if you use sass/scss or less you should import only what you use so wtf are you even tlaking about, code is minified and auto prefixed + optimised by the build pipeline
>> HTML is worthless without JavaScript.
stupid statement but anyway JS is ruling and web components / polymer will give html some power back
>> JavaScript is worthless without jQuery.
false, stopped using jquery 5 years ago and there are websites like youmightnotneedjquery.com that will provide polyfills for just what you want to use
>> never write a single line of JavaScript if there's a 500KB plugin for it. don't review the code, just include it.
we have 2 dev review every chunk of code we put in using pull requests. There are QAs checking the code. Every dependency is agreed with the team, and we don't have too many of them.
>> never have less than 8MB of scripts per page in total. make sure they block rendering.
false, anyway I normally build universal SPAs so I never had block rendering issues
>> when in doubt, copy-paste from StackOverflow without understanding.
retard statement

>>53751262
uuuh that's hard https://www.owasp.org/index.php/Cross-Site_Request_Forgery_(CSRF)_Prevention_Cheat_Sheet

am I a good developer like you now?

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>>53751145
> actually, fuck relational databases. they've been around for 40+ years which is probably a bad thing.
That reminds me, I've always wonder why people always equate "old" with "bad"?
If something still works well why try and replace it with inferior shit just because it's newer?
>pic unrelated

holy shit, these webdevfags are not joking

>>53751684
How hard was it to match the font color?

>>53751746
I actually didn't make it myself.
Took it from one of /co/'s Injustice threads.

>>53751500
>if you answer efficency you're beyond ridicolous and I won't argue any more
>if you give an actual valid answer I'll throw a tantrum
Webdev confirmed.

>>53751500
>>53751513
> never had to use that knowledge
Because you're a faggot that relies on a framework without a shadow of understanding of what's actually happening. I'm pretty sure you use different HTTP verbs, request/response headers, cookies to keep state (in a fucking stateless protocol HTTP is) and so on on a daily basis. If you do all that without understanding how it translates to the protocol level, you really should change your profession to shoveling shit.

> Why would someone learn low level
Because if you don't understand how your fancy high-level data structures are actually implemented, you're unable to make conscientious decisions which of them and how to use with performance in mind, which makes you a code monkey.

> you are not supposed to reinvent the wheel
All junior developers *are* supposed reinvent the wheel. Many fucking times. Only then they can have any idea of how a "third-party wheel" works and what makes it good or shitty. 90% of "web developers" use frameworks like they're black boxes.

> I've used oracle pl/sql postgres mysql and more
Throwing a bunch of RDBMS names doesn't prove you're able to design a database in third normal form and build your system around it, Pajeet.

> saying nosql is a meme means you don't know a fuck about programming
Saying it's not proves you know shit about transactions, consistency and durability.

>>53751500
>obviously false
It's not, webdevs don't know what pointers are. What the difference between a struct and object are. What big O notation is and why it matters. They use whatever is available on whatever framework they're using. I have never ever seen a webdev use a sorting algorithm and neither have you.
>Anyway frameworks should ease your life as you are not supposed to reinvent the wheel
So do libraries, with less crap added. But then again, webdevs don't know the difference between a library and a framework.

Also the point is this thread is about mocking bad webdevs. Your complaint is "but I'm not like that" - great, you're a good webdev. Fantastic. Why are you even here then?

>>53751976
my point is that you are describing bad *web* developers but you can just remove the web word and have the same argument about how bad /g/ "developers" looks... I've only seen basic school algorithms - never a talk about architecture / microservices / how to do things instead of re-writing a world-known algorithm

I've done that shit 10-11 years ago in pure C and know how sort algorithms work. That said I never had to implement and use one of those algorithm because they already fucking exist and I don't want to lose 0.1 sec to sort an array.

If i had to do so I'd be like an everyday /g/ user that whines about bad developers and never wrote something that is in production and it's served to thousands of clients.

>>53752040
>you can just remove the web word and have the same argument about how bad /g/ "developers" looks
Then make that thread. This one is about people inferior to your Elder God-tier webdev skills.
To be fair I'd use implemented sorting algorithms as well, especially if it's smart the way Java does it: use the algorithm more appropriate for the size of the vector/list/whatever so you don't end up doing a mergesort on a 5-element array.

>>53752090
>To be fair I'd use implemented sorting algorithms as well, especially if it's smart the way Java does it: use the algorithm more appropriate for the size of the vector/list/whatever so you don't end up doing a mergesort on a 5-element array.

nice. so you'll have one full nanosecond of performance boost that will sure be needed!

you'll learn that those are really specific problems that you'll have to face when/if you get on that situation. AGILE methodology says you should be lean and work only on what's immediatly needed, iterating and refactoring a lot. so unless you don't have sort performance problems you shouldn't spend a day or a week writing sorting algorithms.


go out

get a job

come back here talking to me pls =)

>>53752151
>so unless you don't have sort performance problems you shouldn't spend a day or a week writing sorting algorithms.
Nigga, I literally just admitted I'd use pre-implemented library sorting. All I did was say how nice it was that it picked the algorithm based on the size, I never said I'd implement it myself. L2read you mongoloid.
>hurr reading isn't necessary for my 45 trillion client business development.

>>53752151
> AGILE methodology says
that when you manage a bunch of webdev pajeets, your only hope of achieving anything resembling quality code is resorting to cargo-cult-like ritualistic magical-thinking "methodologies".

>>53751145
> have no clue how to design a properly normalized relational database or how to query it. rely on your framework's ORM, pretending business objects map to database tables 1:1. if they don't, denormalize even more.

Every. Single. Intern. Every. Single. Day.

One more month guys, I can make it.

>>53751526
hey. you butt-hurt faggot. he's not talking about people that seem to know what they're doing. he's talking about rookies who come in and don't know anything and shit all over the code.

I write my backends in assembler for maximum performance.

I use html cgi-scripts only. I inline css because parsing the css file slows down the web browser.

>>53751145
>>53751168
What's the correct way to learn web dev?

I don't want a job in the field (although my friend said he could get me a cushy job fucking with SQL), I just want to actually understand how all the shit works because it all seems extremely (over)complicated.

I know how to use html/css/js/various frameworks to get shit done and make things pretty but I have no idea how it all works on a deeper level and how to minimize dependency on abstractions. Seems like there's so much to know because the languages that came to prominence were ugly and bad, so they got patched up, and then the patches got patches, etc etc

I can't tell how many "coder xD" frameworks/extensions on say github are actually useful or are just useless toy cruft made by shit webdevs

And speaking of toys, what would be good for publishing a basic portfolio/site? I was using hakyll with sass and some other stuff for a while and it was nice after some tweaking but feel like maybe wordpress would be easier in the long run

>front end
>developer

why do front end people keep calling themselves programmers or developers?
they are just designers.

I thought I was bad at CS but when I finished uni and started working I was seriously suprised how many dumb people are with "IT" and CS diplomas.
Can't understand basics like trees, heap, stack, can't leave their comfort zone language...

>>53752836
> I write my backends in assembler for maximum performance.
Years ago I actually did write a quite large, performance-critical piece of web code as a PHP extension in C. Worked like a motherfucking charm for years.

>>53751976
Uhm you're full of shit. I wrote a sorting algorithm and I'm a webdev. I actually started programming in C++, I went to an IT profile high school where we were learning the basics, like CPU architecture and graph theory and binary arithmetics when I was like 16-17 years old.
When I wrote my first algorithm in Basic or Pascal you weren't even planned to exist.

This board is so full of living memes like yourself. You think compiled languages are the bees knees and you're so fucking speshul for writing fizzbuzz in legacy languages. Newsflash for you, buddy, in 10 years nobody except OS devs will be using compiled languages. So you'll be out of work, because if you had OS development level of knowledge you wouldn't be shitposting on /g/.

>>53754387
Because Javascript.

>>53751222

>It's a not even him, but post

So how do I become a good web dev then? What languages and tools should I use?

>>53755066
this. some people think that writing boilerplate memory management code makes them smart, while it's easy as fuck compared to designing a maintainable and modular high-level architecture

Any tips for doing it right then?
I just got hired to do a project which is based on javascript.
Should I see how much I can remove without breaking the functionality I want or should I keep the original project as untouched as possible?

I am not a web developer.

>>53756497
> implying the two are mutually exclusive