Get on the ground, fucko! Squad, take his computer and all other electronics!
h-hi officers... i-i hope you like anime
Well that fucking sucks, that's 6 computers in total. What the fuck am I supposed to do?
>>52660111
if they've identified you and come to your house, you've already fucked up
>and all other electronics
You're gonna need a bigger truck, officer
>>52660111
GOD NO
i need to configure my xorg.conf
>>52660111
Old meme best meme
>>52660187
This. They already got enough to convict, it doesn't matter what you do, fucko.
>>52660204
Was /fucko/ the final nail in /cyb/'s technicolor coffin? After the nackposting disaster that consumed /cyb/ for a week, the threads stopped being made. And shortly after that fuckoposting evolved into /fucko/ - Cyber Security General.
Was /cyb/ never able to get started again proper because cyber security was being discussed at length in /fucko/, and all other elements of /cyb/ were effectively just aesthetics?
>>52660262
Probably. I don't have an answer so I'll just agree with you
heh, nice try
*teleports behind officer*
*unsheaths katana*
*cuts their heads off*
>>52660319
FUCKO
>>52660111
If the cops are raiding you with a no-knock search warrant, you've already fucked up big time.
>tfw running a mechanical steam powered computer
>tfw no electronic parts
your move faggots
What happens when they take your computer, but you pay all your bills online?
>>52660370
Contact your bank and tell them the cops seized your computer.
TIME STOP
GATE
METEOR SWARM
I'm white so I'll be fine. Cops love me.
>>52660206
>circumstantial evidence for a search warrant
>the same as being guilty
Living in Shitfuckistan has its advantages. No police force gives a fuck
>>52660402
But I call people with MagicJack, the only way to make calls without a phoneline right from you're computer.
>>52662103
Wow! Where can i get one of these MagicJacks? I would love to purchase one!
>>52661962
This
>>52660111
I have a wireless HDD under the floor.
But if you guys can find it, you can have it.
>>52660111
And they all take 5.45 to the face.
God damn I love being American.
>>52663682
They supposedly have eclectronic sniffing dogs now.
Am I getting SWAT'd? Sorry viewers I'll be back in 20 minutes!
>>52663929
How??? what do they smell? electronics usually don't have a smell if they are kept clean.
>>52661923
This. This is why all of my doors and windows have electromagnet systems wired into them with a single panic button
>implying anyone would be willing to step through the piles of refuse
>>52664044
It's not a smell. The can detect the radiating electrical energy with training
>>52660369
is that a thing? can that be a thing? i want that
>>52660194
massive dildos.
>>52664168
probably the most bullshit post I've seen on /g/ in a long time.
>>52664478
How do you figure?
>>52663703
5.45 is a shirt cartridge.
awoo
>>52663564
I agree! Can MagicJacks be used to hack and crack your way into private systems?
Slip me that onion link to buy me some couple MagicJacks!
>>52660206
>implying they don't search your house for evidence and use parallel construction
>>52663682
Get yourself a storage box at the bank or put that shit in a server.
>>52660118
>show them your anime collection
>detective is a huge weeaboo
>sit and watch code geass s2 together
>>52665145
>Show them your anime collection
>Detective has shit taste too
>Sit down and watch Code Gayass S2 together
FTFY
>>52665145
>detective is a huge weeaboo
Yay to my hentai collection
>>52660319
*sheaths katana*
*heads fall immediately after*
>>52665776
>Katana
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3037356/Hacked-pieces-Samurai-sword-burglars-got-unpleasant-surprise-victim-fought-back.html
TL;DR:
>Argentina
>Chad thundercock Pedro, 49
>In house w/ trophy wife
>3.30 in the morning
>Some degenerate tries to break in
>Burglars got firearms
>Shitgotreal.jpg
>Pedro happens to be a weeb
>Grabs a fucking katana
>Legit 10/10 nippon no-cosplay bullshit
>Lashes out at the degenerates
>Hacks the shit out it with the fury of a weeb masturbating to 1000 naked lolies
>Cuts through ribs, arms and almost one ear
>Blood and piss everywhere
>Thieves steal some money and the car
>Car crashes eventually
>One of the thieves manage to get the fuck out
>Three others get caught
>The other one has to go to the hospital
>Gets caught
Alpha as fuck
>>52665903
Here you would go jail for that and then you would have to pay for damage inflicted on thief's.
>>52660111
please no it was just a funny joke no more
>>52663682
I guess you preserve all your porn files, how many gbs?
>>52663682
in the UK the police have these little handheld boxes that pick up on anything electrical in the vicinity.
Pfft, good luck getting my encrypted hidden partition
>>52665903
>Those pictures
Holy shit
>>52666082
They ask you the code ma fucking genius
>>52660111
I's already too late officer
I am internet already
>>52666100
And I live America I don't have to tell them, and since its hidden I claim plausible deniability to if it even.exists
>>52660111
>tfw when only two laptops
>tfw only one running, other is throwaway with live-tails per USB-drive
>tfw when mainmachine has no battery for when intruders/police come to get my stuff
>tfw only have to plug out the power cable and everything is save
inb4 data in ram cache
Someone post the webm of the hot pockets hacker getting raided while the anime music is playing
I'm a repair tech.
I have 2 desktops and 3 laptops of my own.
10 desktops and 18 laptops in storage.
Over 100 misc hdd's.
Good fucking luck going through all that shit.
I do wonder, though... what happens if they find questionable content on a hdd that wasnt originally mine, that was pulled out a customers old PC?
>>52660351
>That glorious mighty eagle and that bad photoshop
Thankfully I built my computer inside of a giant microwave and have connected it to a bunch of car batteries and a DC converter. I push my foot down and it's all gone, no one will ev-
>>52666265
You in America? They're about to pass a bill that tells you, repair guy, to report cp you find or else you're liable
>tfw this will be how I will get outed as a homosexual to my parents
>>52666304
In europe.
Thing is, out of the hundred hdd's I have, I have maybe checked 15 or 20.
What if someone wiped their hdd before giving me the computer, and law enforcement run forensics on one and finds stuff on it, which I had no clue about? Am I still liable?
(Assume I dont keep records of who gave me what or when)
>>52666371
nah they look at all the metadata and shit and they can tell exactly when shit was acessed and all that
>>52666304
What if I haven't gotten to the PC yet? Or if I simply haven't found anything because I wasn't looking?
I rarely have someone else's pc these days but when I do, I don't make a habit of going through their files.
>not being prepared to deal with the cops
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiBI0yrtHUo
>>52666366
stupid fags, not even marriage is allowed for you cunts
>>52660111
One second kind officiers. I will open the locked door in 1 second let me get the key.
https://youtu.be/CiBI0yrtHUo
sorry officer but there's only hentai and vidya
>dildos can be electrnic
>>52666109
They arrest you and oblige to talk, and trust me, they can
>>52666687
the point of a hidden encrypted partition is that it's hidden inside another encrypted partition and you are supposed to give them the password for the non-hidden one.
That's how plausible deniability works
Have fun cracking aes 256
>>52664295
If you got the room for it and enough men to operate it, go ahead.
>The authorities confiscate your counterfeit pepes
>>52667241
/thread
>>52660111
>watch police peoples carry equipment through doorway
>doorway is strong electro magnetic device wiping drives and hardware as it passes through
Good thing I have https://youtube.com/bCodVbucTbo playing at my house 24/7 for just this
>filevault 2 encryption
G-good luck
>>52669378
>>52660111
Good thing I backup everything off site
>>52660262
I assume you mean 2^3 chan's cyb?
My /cyb/ is still going strong.
>>52669462
Nice to know your data is still out their, while you are in prison.
>>52669326
Show me your ways.
>>52665145
>liking anime makes you a weeaboo
What self-respecting officer uses "fucko" as an insult? It's like they just learned to swear or something
>>52660111
k, i hope you enjoy my luks encrypted harddrives :)
please get back to me when you can give them back
>>52669436
>"It's a very long password that I made easy to forget in times of stress!"
>>52671230
>Implying they would believe that
They'd just keep beating you senseless.
>>52671008
The detective likes anime because he is a weaboo, he is not a weaboo because he likes anime.
Go ahead officers, hope you like weird (but legal) porn. Just don't look behind my fridge or you will find something illegal.
>>52671300
Why do I care? Theoretically, a short term beating is a lot better than giving them access. You know it's not like movies, yeah? They just kill you after anyway. It doesn't matter if you give them the pass or not.
>>52671300
What if I have a good lawyer?
Genuine question... I just ditched MS Windoze on my ThinkPad. Installing Debian 8 right now. What should I do to protect my data in such a way that if the laptop is powered off it is all encrypted?
>>52671480
Drugs? Illegal mold?
>>52671547
Small bag of weed.
>inb4 DUUDE WEED LAMO>>52671547
>>52671500
LUKS + DMcrypt
I have my electronics rigged to self destruct if the door is ever opened.
>>52671008
>It does and you're in denial
Kindly kill yourself
>>52671495
hahahahaha a lawyer! hahaha. hit him harder.
>>52665903
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrWiUGgyPWU
Jokes on you, my hard drive is encrypted :^)
>>52673672
I guess we will have to decrypt it
>>52663682
isn't this just a less safe and shittier version of just storing your shit on a remote server in one of those countries with no laws?
>>52673799
only applies to hardware encryption
software encryption ftw
>>52660111
>implying my electronics aren't protected
>pic related
>encryption installed
enjoy the electric chair, terrorists.
I interject and explain that they must have the wrong house, since my birth certificate clearly says female
the 20 keyfiles needed for all of my encryption are on a single disc that just got nuked when you busted the door open
>>52673799
can someone explain pic?
>>52676146
>get tortured for password
sharpie in the pooper, soldering iron edition
>>52676173
thats what I thought, its just that >>52675869 confused me
>>52666304
What if it's an FBI computer? They have plenty of CP.
>>52673799
>use rubberhose file system
>give them a couple of the passwords after a bit of torture
>first two get cat pictures, third gets minor incriminating evidence for something that wouldn't get you much time but they could still try to prosecute you with
>they can't actually use that for anything because they had to torture you to get it and left evidence of torture
>get massive settlement
Good job.
>>52660262
/cyb/ in general is not going anywhere b/c it's stuck in the steampunk lel let's dress up as faggots " mindset " ( also this is a metaphor ( you autist ))
Would it be possible to magnet-wipe all hard drive data quickly and reliably? Breaking bad style?
>>52660302
that is one trippy pippy
>>52663703
>you are now on death row
dog bless ameriga
>>52666026
He went to trial but court dismissed the case over legitimate defense.
>>52660319
kc culiau
>>52664218
Most bullshit post on /g/
>>52677712
Thought I'd find an article that's on your reading level. Note the section on weather.
https://www.thedodo.com/5-amazing-things-dogs-can-sense-before-they-happen-1186416501.html
>>52677763
wow then if it's on thedodo.com it must be true
Anyone got the "Fucking the Fucko" infographic?
>>52671230
>password is just a bunch of characters mashed on the keyboard and set to "always remember"
