>Describe a programming language like how you would describe a person.
He's a real cunt. Always with the fucking long words. The little cunt has his own ring of garbage trucks to come clean up after him, no lie.
Once you get to know him, he's nice though. He gets along with everyone pretty well.
>>51850398
java?
>>51850441
>fucking long words
>own ring of garbage trucks
>gets along with everyone pretty well
Pretty obvious.
>>51850367
>she never tells me what's wrong, acts like everything is cool with a hint that is not so cool
>>51850464
>he's nice though
threw me off
>>51850398
python
He is a very useful and functional man that has been around the block. Hipsters hate him though and say he is outdated
>>51850482
javascript?
>>51850367
CSHARP IS WEARING GLASSES TO SEE SHARP
https://soundcloud.com/fecshrooms/696a
She's emotionally disturbed and a mess. You can feed her stake and then milk right after and she would take it in without even flinching. Hasn't grown up for so long that her parents have decided to skip an entire age year. She's so vulnerable that boys often take interest in her.
>>51850509
C/c++?
>>51850588
php?
>>51850588
>decided to skip an entire age year
Was it referring to the jump from PHP 5 to 7?
He's pretty autistic with all thast obsession with detail and you the fact that you can't joke around with him. He's the fastest in what he is supposed to do, but its a pain in the ass to adapt to this guys peculiar personality. His friends claim he's a genius and he does in fact look very complex. Hes literally the worst getting along with others he doesn't know, having to change his entire personality to adapt into a new group.
>>51850832
https://soundcloud.com/fecshrooms/696a
HASKELL
>>51850861
Nope.
>>51850832
C++
>>51850650
>>51850697
Correct. xD
>>51851730
>xD
Are you a girl? Will you be my gf please?
he's a homosexual that lets other homosexuals use him for homosexual purposes
>>51851787
Swift? NodeJS?
>>51851787
Swift
>Second oldest guy in the block.
>Has many brothers that kinda look alike.
>>51851843
Lisp
>>51851894
You got it
He starts counting at 2.
useless
>>51851966
C++?
>>51851966
mindfuck
Only NEETs and people who are irrelevant circlejerk and praise it, while not having gone beyond a beginner level of programming knowledge/experience.
>>51850367
Gorgeous
>>51852125
Haskell
He's the patriarch of a rich family but likes to live modestly. He lacks many of the things we now take for granted but he's resourceful enough to make do. His son tries to one up everything.
>>51852125
Latex?
>>51852173
>>51852200
I was aiming for C but close enough.
>>51852211
Should have used a pointer asshole.
>>51850509
>functional
Lisp?
>>51850832
Assembler?
>>51852125
>>51852211
That's ridiculous. C is used all over the place for systems software and HPC.
he's an abomination that does everything entirely through this father, who does everything through their father, and their father, and their father, and their father...
>>51852319
>That's ridiculous. C is used all over the place for systems software and HPC.
Not by anyone on /g/ though. They spend more time arguing about what language is more efficient in completely minor ways and making "efficient" fizzbuzzes over actually making an actual program.
>>51850509
Perl?
This kid, dumb as rocks, likes to act like a know-everything smartass. You give him a problem and he'll solve it.. after a year. Watch him work sometime, all the formulas he uses have to be perfectly aligned or he stops and goes into the fetal position. For some reason the scientific community likes to make him solve their problems.
>>51852432
This is what you said originally:
>Only NEETs and people who are irrelevant circlejerk and praise it
That's simply not true. MANY NEETs and irrelevant people like C, but many other people do, too.
>>51852467
I want to say Python but it doesn't seem right.
>>51852467
Python?
>>51852467
Python.
Xhe really, really dislikes eggplants.
Diz bitch be really anal about everything, claims to have invented programming but anyone who actually researches this claim realizes she's talking out her ass. No one uses her anymore.
>>51852598
Babbitch-omatic v.0.0.03a?
>>51852598
cobalt
>>51851936
LUA?
>>51851751
Only if you consider traps girls
It's like she's my wife, she's always taking my things and leaving them where ever the hell he wants. Just the other day I was setting up my working space to go with this new design I had in mind, I had it all planned out and it even looked kind of nice. I went over to her to ask for some help putting the things in to the space, she said sure, we moved everything from out of the room into the room and then took a break to collect ourselves. It was then that I realized how much easier it was doing this stuff without having to tell her about it. Anyway, we went back in and I started trying to put the place together, realized I couldn't do it on my own and asked her for help with putting things how I wanted. She offered to do it herself so I could focus on my work. I thought, "hey great", so I went out of the room and then came back later. When I came back everything that was in the pile in the center of the room was now just piled on the far left corner. When I asked her about it she said she did it like it was supposed to be. When I mentioned to her what it was I did and then showed her the plans as I had them she said she couldn't recall that there even was a plan.
I really miss the bachelor life, when I didn't have to worry about someone else putting things away wherever they want and could just do it all myself. It was a bit more work but I didn't have to deal with this kind of bullshit just to get a few perks out of the whole system put in place just for the sake of marriage. What a crock.
There's two in this one.
>>51852794
Autism. I hope you did not seriously type this out just for a thread on an indonesian comic book website.
A dumb youngfuck that thinks he knows everything but does everything backwards and completely wrong.
Fuck guessing, it's Python.
An old but very capable man, easy to get along with and understand, but his only hobby is fixing Windows on old houses. He can do it very efficiently, making them look spectacular but outside of that area he knows nothing about the rest of the structure of the house.
He is slowly passing away but still able to wrestle with the best of them in his area of expertise.
>>51852467
lambda
>>51852794
Also, in the bachelor life I could have all the same functionality and instead just had to hire on a third party to help with decorating.
>>51852125
Lisp
>>51852467
haskell
>>51850367
Basic
Basic
I hope I'm the first one who does this.
He can speak French in Italian. He once won a staring contest with his own reflection. He has parallel parked a train. If he were to punch you in the face you would have to fight off a strong urge to thank him.
>>51852915
>but his only hobby is fixing Windows on old houses
C is not limited to Windows, no?
>>51852827
I'm not married but we all have parents.
Why are you mods always chasing my tail. Anyone even remotely versed in either of the languages I'm referring to knows what I'm talking about. Anyone that has had a mom growing up knows what I'm talking about too.
If you want to talk to me all you have to do is send a skype name or something and I'll talk to you. No need to call me names and pretend not to know what I'm talking about. Am i having a meltdown over here now? Should I go get myself educated?
>>51852783
Yes i do
>>51852915
>>51852917
>>51852950
Wrong.
The correct answer was Delphi.
>>51852865
Bash!
Does bash count as a programming language?
>>51852970
Ooooh good one
only niggers code in this language
>>51853040
Visual Basic
>>51853040
>only niggers code in this language
That's how you would describe a person?
>>51850509
Haskwell or assembly
>>51853081
>haskell
>old
dumb fucking jew. also hipsters love haskell.
>>51853055
black girls
>only niggers come in this girl
>>51850509
def LISP
>>51852614
COBOL?
>>51853281
there it is
it's been a while since i had to memorize it for a dumb cs quiz
>>51852827
Alright since you're being a big dumb meanie.
It's Java and C++
Java lightweight framework, that are not thread safe, and C++ with third party libraries for everything.
>>51852948
This has to be Lisp.
>>51853506
I suppose it also could be, but that's not what I was thinking of.
I think the real answer is going to rustle some jimmies.
He gkues everything he sees, always mumbling incoherently, but there's no one better to depend on for simple tasks
>>51854799
Glues, sorry
He wears a hand-knit wool scarf in September.
He takes his Macbook to Starbucks to work on the same screenplay that has kept him busy for years.
He is almost identical in height, build, and facial hair to one of the most popular guys around, yet is almost completely ignored because he's so far up his own ass.
He's surprisingly popular among amature game developers, who feel at home among his ironic glasses and banjo that he never plays.
He's the head of a surprisingly large family of complete idiots. New children are born by the month. The family used to be in the painting and lighting business, and most of the kids still work there, but a few years back one of the kids married into a different family and opened the way for new kids to get jobs downtown.
>>51854799
Python
>>51852467
MATLAB?
>>51855261
Shit, you have to be right. Why didn't I think of that?
>>51854825
r-ruby can make games and not just webstuff?
>>51851966
CSS
>>51855390
>inb4 not programming language
>inb4 turing complete
>>51850441
Very average, boring businessman. Not especially intelligent or good at anything in particular, but works hard. Very rigidly follows rules. Always shits in the designated streets.
>>51854871
Linux is not a language, dumbass
Extremely down-to-earth and wise, but is considered a joke by most.
Why does C fit most if not all the descriptions here?
>>51855453
Javascript
C: Simple and old fashioned.
Java: My way or the high way. His way isn't bad either, though it tends to be needlessly round-about.
C++: Rushes everything and tends to confuse people when his explanations aren't small.
Perl: Nobody can follow his thoughts, but he can follow anybodies.
Python: The guy who though he could build his Ikea desk chair with only half the screws. He stole some from his couch to make it all work.
Php: A special needs teacher who quotes Bob Ross because she doesn't believe in conflict.
