Why don't we have this
<--
>>47699989
because we're not japanese
get it straight son
>>47699996
B-b-but why???
Everybody needs clean butts.
Not just Japanese ppl
>>47699996
middle class Chinese have it too now. and it's really really nice in winter. everybody should have it.
>>47699989
you can. just purchase and install it.
>>47700009
I agree I always thought its disgusting to just wipe your ass with tissues after taking a shit.
>>47700034
Use a bidet you retarded fuck
>>47700054
Not all public toilet have those. No need to be so angry :^)
>>47700034
Yeah you still have a lot of bacteria there.
That's why you use this.
It's also really useful when you are constipated
I'd just like to interject for a moment. What you’re referring to as Toilet, is in fact, GNU/Toilet, or as I’ve recently taken to calling it, GNU plus Toilet. Toilet is not an operating system unto itself, but rather another free component of a fully functioning GNU system made useful by the GNU corelibs, shell utilities and vital system components comprising a full OS as defined by POSIX.
Many toilet users run a modified version of the GNU system every day, without realizing it. Through a peculiar turn of events, the version of GNU which is widely used today is often called “Toilet”, and many of its users are not aware that it is basically the GNU system, developed by the GNU Project. There really is a Toilet, and these people are using it, but it is just a part of the system they use.
Toilet is the kernel: the program in the system that allocates the human's excrements to the other programs that you run. The kernel is an essential part of an operating system, but useless by itself; it can only function in the context of a complete toilet system. Toilet is normally used in combination with the GNU operating system: the whole system is basically GNU with Toilet added, or GNU/Toilet. All the so-called “Toilet” distributions are really distributions of GNU/Toilet.
>>47700077
Shit son.
We need that as well.
And we shall call it - smarttoilets
Let's do this before Apple takes all the credit for this idea
why is the water level so high on that picture, it will splash like motherfucker
The company I used to work for manufactured, amongst many other things, the heating elements for Japanese toilet seats.
No joke.
Because you're a fucking retard.
>inb4 someone shits on the seat of a self cleaning toilet
Why don't we have this?
<--
>>47700476
Because we don't live in the third world.
>>47699989
You will have one, once Apple reveals its new iPoop active lifestyle rectal waste apparatus.
>>47700476
Where have I seen it? Oh right, Russia.
>>47700063
Get raped and kill yourself, you retarded fucking faggot sack of shit with down syndrome.
>>47699989
My dad has a newer version of that. He's crippled. Are you crippled anon?
>>47700430
>>47700430
...
this is literally the first result if you google 'self cleaning toilet gif'
>>47700550
>>47700551
reversed
>>47700550
top kek
>>47700551
>>47700550
get me ery tiem
Is it true that some parts of the world still do not have bidets as common bathroom accessories?
>>47700640
only free countries
How hard are these to install on a regular toilet? I found a place where they sell toilet seats with auto heathing, water to spray your ass with etc.
>THEY HAVE WATER IN THEIR TOILET BOWLS
LETERALLY WHY? Do you people actually enjoy water splashing back on you when you take a shit/piss? Do you like getting your dick touching the water?
What is the purpose of the water being inside the toilet bowl?
i actually dont use a toilet, i piss into a jar and poop onto a newspaper sheets and fold them to store, after a while i empty the urine jar into a sink and put a bunch of folded newspaper sheets with feces into a garbage bag
>>47702100
If you have to shit on a dry shelf, I genuinely feel sorry for you.
>he has to smell his disgusting coiled up turds for the entire time he's taking a shit
Plus, in pretty much all civilized countries, water in the bowl means the toilet is functional.
>>47702165
>Plus, in pretty much all civilized countries, water in the bowl means the toilet is functional.
But why not just have the water wash it down when you flush?
It's pretty frusturating to get your ass and ballsack constantly wet.
>>47702163
Post pics.
>>47702174
water covers up the smell of your turds while you're performing your bowel movement
also nobody told you to put your penis inside the bowl, retard.
>>47702174
Poop just sitting in the air stinks worse than poop under water
>>47702176
i prefer to keep it private
>>47702194
>nobody told you to put your penis inside the bowl
How do I urinate while shitting?
Water covering it up doesn't seem to help.
>>47702205
Please.
>>47702100
Physic. The shorter the distance between anus and water level, less time needed when poop hit water. Velocity defined by the differentiation of acceleration by time, hence lower moment of velocity when poop hit water.
When poop hit water it carried momentum energy that is directly proportional to mass and velocity. The lesser the momentum energy, the lesser the repulsive force which translated into upward water splash. The maximum height of upward water splash is directly proportional to the amount of repulsive force produced.
>>47702206
>how do I urinate while shitting
you don't
only women pee sitting down
You stand up and you aim your penis at the the bowl like a real man.
honestly from the amount of houses I've been in it seems like america is the worst at designing bathrooms.
>piping underfloor boards hard af to get to to determine leaks.
>not completely tiled, or at the very least lineoliuem.
homes start degrading in the bathroom. I think they do this on purpose.
>>47702234
Don't forget toilets that are so close to the door that they can't be open or closed when someone is sitting there
>>47702174
>>47702223
>You stand up and you aim your penis at the the bowl like a real man.
But what if I need to take a shit? Are you trying to say that you can control your bladder while defecating? Because I'm pretty sure that's not natural
>>47702252
Yes, you can control your fucking bladder when your anus is open.
Are you retarded?
Do you have zero self control?
>>47702217
the urine jar is empty at the moment, emptied it a few hours ago, and i have a few folded newspaper sheets with feces on the balcony, and newspaper contents pretty much tells my location down to a few kilometers and im not an exhibitionist
>>47702234
At least bathroom is not in the kitchen like korea.
>>47702251
drop a piece of toilet paper on the surface of the water and aim for it
>>47702264
>Yes, you can control your fucking bladder when your anus is open.
That's not a normal human function are you trolling right now?
While defecating you also empty your bladder, there is no other way around it unless you have some sort of medical anomaly.
>>47702264
Nope. It's far easier to piss sitting down. Besides, I don't like the feeling of unwiped shit on my butthole.
>>47702290
>shitting in the woods
>squat down to take a shit
>oh no my bladder can't control itself!
>piss all over my legs and pants and underwear
>a-at least everyone is like me!
you sound like a fucking moron
>>47702304
>you sound like a fucking moron
That is leterally what happens. Unless you already emptied your bladder in which case it will most likely only drip urine.
It takes more muscles to shit, so when you're squeezing to shit you also release bladder which is much easier to do. Find any resource that says otherwise, I dare you.
>>47700566
that wouldn't happen if they properly bagged their trash, fucking idiots
>>47702304
I've never done this before. Do you bring toilet paper along or do you use sticks or leaves?
>>47702264
I know that I can't.
>>47702322
my bladder definitely empties when i poop
>>47702322
>he thinks the pelvic floor muscles have anything to do with the anus
Confirmed for retard.
Why don't we do this?
<--
>>47702304
>oh gotta take a shit
>hang on a second
>fullbladder.tiff
>i'm gonna piss first then take a dump
>shit in pants
>>47702356
...what is the point?
>>47702352
Le picaroo related face
>>47702369
Alright then, retard.
Explain why you don't shit your pants when you take a piss.
>>47702386
I just did, you use less muscles or require less squeezing. As it says in links in the picture.
People seem to experience what I'm talking about more than what you are. Mayb u just have le medicial anomaly :^)
>>47700068
>It's also really useful when you are constipated
Please explain.
>>47702386
When you feel that your turds are coming out when you take a piss, you try to stop them, but you also stop pissing.
Are you 5 years old ?
>>47702396
>links in picture
they're all forum posts from 8 year olds on newgrounds
you cannot be serious
am i being trolled what the fuck is going on
>>47700068
I knew it. I knew the whole bidet thing was fucking sexual. You all just like having things blasted up your asshole.
>>47702386
>>47702419
there's nothing wrong with feeling sexual pleasure from your anus
denying yourself pleasure from the most sexually erogenous part of your body is just plain dumb
>>47700367
The hole in the seat's just small, look closer
>>47702290
No anon. You can control your bladder while pooping. There is two different muscles for that. Obviously you can control them independently (you can urinate and not defecate) so you can crap without pissing
>>47699989
Even Menards has shit like that now, the only reason you don't is because you haven't installed one.
>Visit Murica for the first time ''Fort something, Florida''.
>Try the toilet
>Water so high my flaccid dick touches it
>Every time I finish shitting I can see my turd so clearly that it's tempting to just grab it
>mfw
>>47702407
>they're all forum posts from 8 year olds on newgrounds
Just googling the query "why do we urinate when we poop" brings up over 20 threads of people asking that very question, with more responses in the thread affirming that is in fact what they experience as well.
You however have not been able to find a single resource that says otherwise, or at least a handful of people agreeing.
You can defecate while pissing if taking a shit CANNOT wait.
Bladder is emptied automatically while taking a crap
Didn't your moms teach you anything ?
>>47702486
>>Every time I finish shitting I can see my turd so clearly that it's tempting to just grab it
do it, it's the american way
>>47702504
Freedom is having so high water in your toilet for easy access turds.
>>47700009
Europe has them
>>47702486
I have not laughed so hard in a long time. I literally shit my pants.
>>47702550
European toilets have shelves for poop.
>>47702252
Yeah, especially if you're having a big shit.
It squeezes the bladder on its way through, making the entire decision to pee involuntary.
do these save on tiolet paper? Im sick to death of having to buy toilet paper esp when my roomies can't be arsed to buy any.
>>47702620
only very old ones have.
>>47702234
>>47702248
Seriously, what do you expect from an entire country of people who wear their shoes inside the house?
>>47702620
>>47702620
No, just German toilets have the shit ledge. They stopped making them I think.
>>47702620
>Try to piss on the shelf
>Pee splashes on your pants and everywhere
Literally a feminist toilet.
/g/ - plumbing
>>47702684
That doesn't happen, anon.
source: I'm german.
>>47702684
It's quite practical. The shit ledge allows you to inspect your poop for worms or other abnormalities. You can't do that with French and Anglo toilets.
>>47702684
it dosen't work this way
on the other hand, taking a very long shit may cause it to just stand on this shelf and then slowly fall down, spreading on your buttcheek in process
>>47702719
>inspect your poop
kek
>>47702720
What kind of rock hard shits are you taking?
>>47699989
It's literally meant to run gentoo.
>>47702808
Right where gentoo belongs.
>>47699989
>Go to Thailand for a month
>Literally every toilet has a spray to shoot up your asshole instead of paper
It's so much fucking superior holy shit
Comes out even cleaner and that ring feels ultra refreshed afterwards
>>47702222
Underrated post
>>47700516
Hmmmmm
Sounds really nice if you have hemorrhoids
>>47702856
Once I finally have my own home I'll get one of these fucking toilets.
>small toilets
>sweaty butt
>being tickled as the sweat keeps going down to my butthole
>mfw
>>47703259
>small toilets
That's because they're made for people, not whales.
/g/ - defecation technology
>>47703285
/Poo inspection
>>47702719
Well in my country, we don't eat literal garbage so that isn't really much of a concern here.
>>47703278
>1.81m 65kg
>whale
Sure.
![Extruder[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/nh11XeQ.jpg "Extruder[1].jpg")
>>47702400
Simple, anon
Think of your shit as Play-Doh
When it dries or hardens it's very hard to push out through your corn hole
You can spray a little water in there to soften it up, and when it's soft it moves out easier and faster
>>47702174
Because when your shit floats, it's less apt to smear all over the sides of the bowl. Ever have a really nasty one that leaves tons of marks behind? That would be MUCH worse without sitting water
>>47702289
Or coat the surface in tp and shit blindly
>>47702669
no my parent got a new one last year (Holland)
'shelf-toilets' are best, just stop using your phone on the toilet and you'll be done before it stinks.
captcha: sssit
>>47703993
I use my tablet until I'm done pooping, it's the same amount of time whether or not I'm using it, it's not like I spend an extra 20 minutes on the seat because it's comfy
>go to home depot today
>see this
what a time to be alive
>>47704205
That's actually pretty dope
>>47699989
Because we're not the Japanese master race.
I don't know, probably because Amerifats would break it and shit all over it.
>start lifting
>reach 4 plate dead and 3 plate squat
>start having to use the seat to pry my glutes apart
>>47699989
Ooooh, they have kits for ordinary toilets on amazon.
amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss/177-3968457-5418847?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Toilet+Bidet
It worked much better than toilet paper when i was on vacation in Japan a few years back, might also save some bucks by not buying paper.
Shiiiit, i might just order one.
>>47699989
because you haven't purchased one yet
>>47702332
>2015
>having to worry about proper bagging
no
gif is just a result of a shit operator or a shit machine
>>47702251
you can just shit in your hand and then throw it in the toilet
also
nice meme
Because this toilets can't clean the ass of a morbidly obese person. For that, you'll need a Kärcher.
>>47702620
plebs ITT can't easily inspect their poop
>>47702620
Tell that to the UK
Our toilets are just like the US' but not as large
>>47702620
What the fuck, i've never seen a toilet with a shelf before and i live in Europe, maybe Scandinavia just never got them.
>>47702550
No we don't. The water level is generally lower than in murrica though. But that just reflects the general wasteful culture they have.
>>47702495
It seems to be a trend in younger folks. I had this issue when I was little. I couldn't poop without peeing. Now I only occasionally pee while pooping and it's only if I feel both urges.
>>47702365
Piss on the one you hate.
>>47705109
New toilets in America have to meet a water standard of 1.6 gallons per flush which was established in 1994. In certain European countries now it's 0.6 gpf. Most new American toilets use 1.3gpf or less though.
>>47700411
>Just like how the landline has evolved to the modern day smartphone, so too, must change be introduced in the world of bidets.
>>47702832
Underrated
>>47704628
>nice meme
You fucking newfag fuck
>>47700476
i've been to a few guest houses like that. Protip: use the hole without the chair. Unless you're disabled and can't squat or smth.
>People defending the shitshelf
Degenerates.
>>47700559
TOPLEL
Youve got to be kidding me that none of you know why the water is there
Its for the ubend, Stopping smells entering the house from the sewer
The function of actualy moving your shit is provided by the flush
Why do humans need toilet paper but not other mammals? Why do we even need asses? Human biology is fucking retarded.
>>47699989
But I do OP
>>47705117
Dude you should do a prostate exame
>>47706274
The water doesn't work, we should just shit into incinerators.
>>47706290
We don't. It's just the western way of shitting is completely wrong.
If you squat like a Slav to shit then you won't need to wipe your ass, it naturally doesn't get shitty.
>>47702332
I'm a day late here, but I just wanted to point out that that bin is used for paper recycling; not something that goes in a bag. We have the same bins where I live.
Carry on with your regularly scheduled shitposting.
>>47706337
Blue bin is for plastics, metals, and glass. Someone could have died.
>>47705119
Primitives.
>>47706312
That would smell even worse.
>>47706365
No, they're for paper, that's why they have the lid.
http://www6.montgomerycountymd.gov/apps/dep/solidwaste/store/index.asp?var_action=itemdetail&itemid=104
>>47706422
Microsoft OLE DB Provider for ODBC Drivers error '80004005'
[Oracle][ODBC][Ora]ORA-00936: missing expression
/apps/dep/solidwaste/store/ItemDetail.asp, line 26
>>47706451
Well, it is a government website so it probably uses some shitty cookie token. Here's the image from the site.
That thing looks fucking scary.
>>47706478
Florida does it better.
>>47706516
How? It's just a fucking toilet with a few buttons and a dial.
>every time I shit the toilet always clogs
>We've had innumerable bad experiences with German toilets. In Berlin, we lived on an upper floor and the water pressure was too weak to push a healthy-sized log off the shelf. After a few minutes' fruitless flushing you'd be forced to grab a wad of toilet paper and give the horrid thing an encouraging nudge. Then followed a lengthy bout of brushing and cleaning to remove the skid marks from the porcelain. At the other extreme, in Munich we lived in a basement suite where the water pressure was too high. Worse, the shelf was actually slightly concave, forming a shallow bowl. The first time I flushed the toilet the water came rushing through so forcefully that a small chunk of poo launched off the lip and shot out over the floor. After that we always held the lid down when we flushed. I swore you could feel a kick as the turd ricoched off the underside.
Fucking germans
>>47706319
But thats wrong, because everyone wipes with something (India using their left hand....)
>>47706337
blue bins like that in my city, and the one in the gif, have containers that take glass, plastic, paper, metal, and cardboard
there are plastic bags flying out of that container
they packed too much shit inside one container is what they did wrong
>>47704628
>>47707994
now have him eat the shit off the floor with the ebin 'everything went better than expected' face
>>47702386
>>47706721
>single case with problems
>fucking <insert someone to blame>
yep, I'm on /g/
I live in germany and didn't have any problems my whole life
get a plumber to fix it you stupid fuck
>>47699989
This is not a tap/faucet, ya 'murican dingus..
Because Americans are too cool for clean genitals, that's faggot shit.
>>47702174
>It's pretty frusturating to get your ass and ballsack constantly wet.
>he has a shitty shallow tiny toilet
>he doesn't put a thin layer of tissue down first to prevent splash and have it wrap the turd as it gets flushed
>not wrapping your turds like presents for your septic tank
>rude
>>47706721
>After that we always held the lid down when we flushed. I swore you could feel a kick as the turd ricoched off the underside.
10/10 pasta
Implying anyone knows how it works..
>>47706306
Why? I'm quite young still.
>>47709085
It's called piss/shit bottles you ungrateful faggots.
>>47709085
>L to R: Cancel, spray water in a stream, spray water in a shower, spray water in a mist
>underneath that, some kind of intensity setting
>idk what's on the right
>power switch in the center
>right side is all heated seat controls
>left is the heat intensity
>next to that is a timer for the heater
>idk what's all the way on the right
>>47702620
this is for germans so they can indulge in their scat fetish
>>47709156
This was one of the toilets i encountered during my vacation in tokyo, I was too scared to press any of the buttons in fear of having to shoot butt off
>>47709203
>i was afraid of the water streams penetrating my virgin boipussy
>>47709264
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilets_in_Japan
Japan superior as usual to other pleb countries
>>47699996
SO CLOSE
>>47700550
>>47700551
>>47700559
testing oc
>>47709338
>>47709414
is this some kind of heterosexual defense mechanism?
There's nothing wrong with a bidet cleaning out your asshole.
>>47700551
This is most definitely why we can't have nice things.
>>47709613
minor, but funny and accurate, meme potential
this is now a pic related thread
>>47709997
pic related
ok quintz
peace yall
I just poop only when I shower. Problem solved.
Been doing that for a good decade now.
Why's it so deep?
