>The year is 1993
>You hear about a one night martial arts tournament, taking place in a eight sided cage
>It is to determine what martial art/fighting style is the best
>Only two rules: No biting or eye gouging
>You can wear anything into the cage and there are no weight classes
>Only way to win is by knockout, submission, or a corner throws in the towel, no time limits
>You enter the tournament to show how superior your fighting style is, you must beat three men in one night and the winner gets $50,000
So /fit/, how would you win the first UFC tournament? Which fighting style/martial art would you utilize?
I'm an arrogant motherfucker, but I'm not arrogant enough to think I'd ever beat the 1993 renditions of Royce Gracie or Ken Shamrock in a fight.
My strategy would be to hope that I was on the opposite side of the bracket of those two.
Although then I might get eye gouged by Gordeau.
Fuck this shit I'm not playing this game.
>>36524475
Hope to fuck, I don't fight Royce or Ken
>>36524475
Here are your opponents and their fighting style:
>Gerard Gordeau (Savate aka French kickboxing)
>Teila Tuli (Sumo wrestling)
>Kevin Rosier (Kickboxing)
>Zane Frazier (American Kenpo Karate)
>Royce Gracie (Brazilian jiu-jitsu)
>Art Jimmerson (Boxing)
>Patrick Smith (Taekwondo)
>Ken Shamrock (Shootfighting, which is using pro wrestling type moves in actual, real fights)
Everyone here would get their ass kicked. Anyone who says otherwise is an idiot.
Muay Thai & Jiu jitsu
![Yorinaga+Nakamura[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/ToKcuSi.png "Yorinaga+Nakamura[1].png")
>>36524584
>Shootfighting, which is using pro wrestling type moves in actual, real fights
Kek, shootfighting is a combo of Sambo, Judo, Catchwrestling, Muay Thai and Karate
You got it backwards, pro-wrestling is based upon real grappling, and got faker and faker with time, but a lot of pro-wrestlers still trained in real grappling. They then brought it back and added a bunch of shit.
My coach was trained under the first Shooto champion and the top stupid of it's founder. Shamrock just wasn't that great.
>tfw Yori is dying
BTW, Erik Paulson would have probably won the first UFC if the Gracie's weren't being dickbags and let him fight.
I'd Roddy Piper the shit out of UFC 1. As soon as the bell rings, immediate nut shot. Just constant nut shots like I'm spamming the nut shot button.
You want to box, you Pearl Jam entrance music using action hero? Eye pokes everywhere. So many eye pokes that a child version of Rousimar Palhares has his jaw on the floor as the cast of NYPD Blue dusts my fingerprints off of your iris.
As soon as he tries to grapple. Boom, welcome to my incredibly greased body that feels like trying to grab soap off of a state pen shower floor. I'd have so much grease on my body that the lighting fixtures would give me 2nd degree burns as I slide to the ring like Silver Surfer, comic book verson. I'd be so hard to get a hold of that my opponent would think I'm Jimmy Hoffa's body.
Going for your stupid sumo palm strikes? Say goodbye to your knee caps as I dropkick them in like a SWAT member busting down a door, wooden frame still intact, unsuspecting drug dealer sprinting through the back door.
Want to over power me, DJ Jazzy Jeff? Look out for my newly cycled off slab of meat body with more holes in my ass than Interstellar has in it's plot. I'd lift you up like you're Simba in a VHS release of Lion King and slam you down like a pog on a schoolyard playground, chalk outline around your gi. I'd have so many drugs running through me that the CIA wouldn't know whether to open up an X-men branch or sell me to the Rolling Stones so they could snort me.
I'd last at least 3 minutes. No doubt in my mind.
Be Dan Severn
by striking and aiki. BJJ a shit.
>>36524736
Excellent
>>36524736
thanks for the new pasta.
although im not sure when we'll use it again
>>36524736
Yeah that could work.
>>36524642
>being dickbags
This
people still believe the first UFC brought a bunch of world class athletes together. That event was the island of misfit toys with special guest: Gracie Challenge 2.0
>>36524475
>>You can wear anything into the cage and there are no weight classes
Show up in full spiked plated scale mail
umad u cant handle my knightstyle m'lady? Fucking peasants.
>>36525574
The Gracie's were good at hyping it up and making it look like it wasn't done for them to show off
I would turn up in armor covered with needles used for injections, so many needles it could trigger trypophobia in people who don't have it, any punch you throw will pierce your hand in hundreds of places, but what you didn't realize is each needle has been crafted to have a hook halfway down, so that when pierced into the skin, you would create a larger exit wound. I would allow my opponent to hit me whilst I block, with rubber insulated inner to reduce shock, until they pass out from immense blood loss.
>>36525668
Autism
I have actually sparred with the winner of UFC 3. He was my instructor at the time.
So... no, I likely wouldn't win.
>>36525750
Of course, the guy who won UFC 3 almost certainly wasn't the best fighter on that card either.
>>36525625
it's strange that people don't seem to remember this.
>>36525775
Rose tinted glasses i reckon or they are casual fans and just assume that it was better back then
>>36525773
He was one of the "alternates". It was almost over and he didn't think he was going to get to fight so he started to leave... they had to chase him down in the parking lot, lol.
>>36525794
Well, the heavyweight division was better back then.
Really, I sometimes think we should just give an exception to the heavyweight division for steroids because holy crap is it bad now.
>>36525902
>Well, the heavyweight division was better back then.
There were no weight classes and they weren't better.
All the top fighters are still on steroids, although they've foolishly started to crack down harder in the past year or so, so they have to switch up their cycling plans.
>>36526039
But look at them now. You use to have these big action movie type fighters like Don Frye and now its just dadbodes everywhere.
>>36525902
Remember when tim sylvia was champion. The heavyweight division has always been up and down
>>36526135
>>36524863
severn lost tho breh
>>36526394
Did he died
>>36526394
Beautiful
>>36524584
>Gerard Gordeau (Savate aka French kickboxing)
Wrong. His style was Kyokushin+Savate. He was the only guy except Gracie who actually correctly did a style and was a fighter instead of either inventing one himself (looking at you, Frazier) or sucking at fighting in general (Jimmerson).
That's also why he got into the final with Gracie, even though he was injured and got fucked over pre-fight (the Gracies were afraid of him and told him he didn't make the cut until a few hours before the thing started).
Does this make him legit? Nope. How do you suppose he got into the UFC competition at all? Well, officially, it's because the Gracies saw him beating up Frank Dux (the guy VanDamme played in Bloodsport, no kidding) somewhere in Paris. That's it.
The whole thing was and will forever be a commercial stunt to sell BJJ to the North American market by pitting the Gracies against complete losers and nobodies who learned fighting in some obscure backyard dojos and never got into a real fight.
You can research all this stuff yourself, it's a complete freakshow and a fucking obvious scam. Then, there's the stuff about all techniques being allowed, but you had to pay real money if you used dangerous techniques like eye-gouging. And so on.
>>36524475
Anyone in here will get his ass ripped, what do you think?
>>36526459
>>36526533
That was round one.
There was a round two.
It was exactly the same.
And it was awesome. Just non-stop gorilla punching.
>>36526394
holy shit that blonde guys eyes were swollen shut even before the fight started
>>36525693
kek
>>36524475
royce gracie is there and its 1993 so i dont know jiu jutsu and im fucked
>>36524642
>my coach
>not saying 'my sensei'
Found the fake martial artist
>>36527219
Uhh, thats actually how you know your martial art is bullshit, they only do shit like that in the movies.
>>36526440
He was close to winning, he didn't want to throw any strikes because it was against the sportmanship wrestler's had.
>>36529024
Luckily Mark Coleman came and said "fuck it" and then we got "ground-and-pound".
>>36524736
Jesus fuck 10/10
>>36527219
Every martial art I've ever been in, the instructor was just "Sir".
(And the instructor's instructor was "Sensei".)
>>36524475
royce would submit me ez
the big roided up NCAA wrestlers would smash me as well
i could probably beat the fake meme martial arts guys
>>36527219
If your martial art class acts like a cult it's probably fake:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeA__6aVkK0
>>36529511
"Protect yourself at all times"
>>36526135
I mean I know Mir vs Hunt happened recently, but Hunt's always been a strongfat samoan dude and Mir is checked out already, doesn't even do cardio.
Overeem vs Arlovski is happening in May: Those dudes absolutely look like action movie characters.
>>36529511
What is happening here?
>>36529755
Recent fight, the guy who kneed was asking the ref for his mouth guard since it fell out of his mouth. The fight was still going on so the dude got kneed while he was distracted. But he was literially kneed and knocked out right as the round ended, so the fight continued and the guy who got kneed won by decision. It was controversial since the guy who got kneed is British and it happened in England, many fought he only because he was the hometown hero.
>>36527219
In Sweden we call our instructors by their first name, weeaboo.
OT: Would I survive? Probably, but I sure as hell wouldn't win any fights. I've been doing MMA for about three months.
I'd pull an Art Jimmerson and just tap out as soon as I was in danger.
>>36529963
desu bisping deserved that decision, and I say this as a big anderson silva fan
anderson threw that fight away by memeing too much and not pursuing the finish after he hurt bisping at the beginning of 5, and again after he hit him with a big front kick
>>36530148
I agree with you dude, it just what I heard a lot.
I honestly think Silva's going to retire soon, he's definitely past his prime and his career just keeps going downhill.
>>36524736
This sir, this right here...is fucking amazing
Applauding*
>>36530075
Would you also wear only one boxing glove?
>>36530760
Yeah why not?
>>36530956
Man, I want to look for the video, but apperently Art said he didn't know Royce could take him down and asked the ref to stand them back up once he got taken down.
Just goes to show how much the Gracie's are such elitists.
>>36529632
I know he's retired now, and he sucked for most of his career, and if he fought stateside he would get caught the second he tested, but I would love to see Bob Sapp in at least one UFC bout.
>>36531127
I miss the freak show fights. I wish UFC would just make a Super-Heavyweight (265lbs.+) division.
It's 1993 I am four.
>>36531261
You could still do it, I'm counting on you anon.
gun kata, obviously
>>36531942
Don't worry dude, there's already weebs in the UFC, just look at Ronda Rousey.
>>36524736
Toppest kek
I would be as much as a loudmouth as possible before the event. Dana White would protect me and put me in a special fight against some alternate fighter. I would take him down and rear naked choke (babbys first sub) him since that fighter wouldn't have no ground game.
I would then make it to UFC 2,3 and 4 building a bigger and bigger hype as I advance.
I would get absolutely #rekt as soon as i get to fight a real fighter tho.
>my coach
>not saying 'my sensei'
>>36529015
>>36530000
>>36529329
He's actually correct in that it is the correct title for an instructor in Shooto, being a Japanese art.
My coach isn't that into titles though, plus he does so many martial arts it would be confusing. Unless you are at a Muay Thai Seminar with his instructor, it doesn't really matter. If his instructor sees you call himself other than Ajarn; every single person at the seminar has to do 100 push-ups, including my coach. Ajarn Chai is notorious for punishing people for shit like that though.
>>36525574
Yah, it was set-up to promote themselves. They expect Royce to win. What they didn't expect was Shamrock to be as good of a grappler as he was.
Just keep in mind Royce was never a standout BJJ guy, and BJJ back then was a little ...old. I'm surprised he never got leglocked, especially by one of the Japanese. Although he might not have tapped.
![maxresdefault[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/LisaFPi.jpg "maxresdefault[1].jpg")
>>36531127
Bob Sapp fought Akebono a few months ago nigga.
Pride is back brah. It's called Rizin FF.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIEl--WYqWQ
>>36533023
That was a kickboxing match, I was talking about MMA.
And I know Rizin, unfortunately I don't really think Japanese MMA is in a good place right now, K1 is in the dumps and Rizin is like the second attempt to revive Pride.
Still hoping Fedor will one day compete in the octagon.
>>36533083
Bob Sapp isn't retired from MMA dude. He could have just as easily done an MMA match against Akebono. The guy is literally a prostitute. If you pay him, he will do whatever.
>>36533117
Nah, if you pay him he'll just tap to strikes 30 seconds into the first round.
Id would go on a bear mode routine and gain fat/muscle and just practice wrestling no way someone can get a380 wrestler of them
>>36524475
Has Ken Shamrock ever accomplish something besides being a sore loser little bitch?
>>36524736
Top kek
>>36533423
He beat Dan Severn pretty quickly one time, but nah, he's only really only famous for being at UFC 1 and being in the WWE. He was apparently living in a trailer for awhile. He just got busted for steroids too.
Dynamite-fu
>>36524736
Brilliant, but Interstellar? a 2014 movie just thrown in an otherwise flawless list of references.
Also, needs an X-files, Simpsons or Friends reference to seal the deal (Though friends was 94, but so was Lion King...)
>>36534129
Well, there no rules against that.
>>36535275
Sorry man, it was pretty much a stream-of-consciousness thing.
>>36524736
>>36524475
>You can wear anything into the cage and there are no weight classes
Great! I'll wear a suit of armor that has bracing to prevent joints from being overextended. Then I'll use any martial art I fucking want because the other guy can't hurt me.
>>36535448
You could do that (Skip to 6:25):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=385&v=4ZIsc6KPkKA
>>36533023
I really do miss when Bob Sapp was great.
If anyone wants to watch the first UFC:
http://www.veoh.com/watch/v141682248SWg59kP
>>36535721
holy fuck thanks m8
>>36534088
>He just got busted for steroids too.
meh he's a swole as fuck 50+ year old man of course he's on steroids, only normie faggots thing people like him are natty.
>>36537416
No problem man, it's fun watching what MMA started out as and what it's turned into.
>>36524736
Kek, I'd give you at least 4 minutes
>>36537441
Too bad they were shit steroids and he got kneed in the balls by 49 year old Royce Gracie in the first fucking round.
>>36531127
He actually broke Nog's neck and STILL lost that fight lol
>>36537616
Pretty sure he was never really formally trained, he was punching and luckily his punches were that of a roided up, 300+ black man.
Dudes literally the ultimate results of PEDs.
>>36537441
Kimbo also got busted, and also got shitty steroids.
Only reason he beat Dada 5000 is because Dada was the first to pass out.
>>36537608
that is shit in deep, Glad to see Royce acting like the br nigger he is though
>>36537806
Royce is an asshole who wishes that MMA return to the no rules era because thats the only way he can win.
>>36537785
>Only reason he beat Dada 5000 is because Dada was the first to pass out.
What a fucking disappointing fight that was, unprofessional as fuck
>>36537822
It got turned into a No Contest from what I've heard, so Dada's still undefeated.
But yeah, Bellator has no problem with showing American freak show fights from Indian Reservation Casinos.
Be Bas Rutten
>>36537875
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU-LNyPUwi8
>>36537822
I hated myself for staying up late and watching that live.
I think Frank Shamrock could've won it since he was one of the first fighters to actually learn more then one martial art to improve himself.
>>36537441
I ain't know shit about MMA but if a 50 year old wants to fight in this shit he should be allowed to use steroids. Like what, he's probably on test and a bit of other shit. Give the dude a break.
>>36538027
Well, for a while the older fighters were allowed to have testosterone replacement therapy (TRT), but it got banned.
>>36524475
there like a 10 percent chance i could triangle or guillotine one of the strikers but no one here on fit is winning thats for sure
>>36538006
when you think no one can be a bigger faggot than Ken shamrock someone like Frank Shamrock appears, is there someone in the Shamrock family that's not a huge fucking baby faggot
>>36526745
hahahaha
My strategy
>>36538167
are bikes allowed?
>>36538199
Is the fight in a sears?
>>36534129
hahaha, I love the other guy's expression and the fact that he's smoking a cigar. Literally gives no fucks.
>>36538214
Jesus christ I forgot just how great Jackie Chan was
>>36538214
am I a manlet?
>>36538214
holy shit
>>36538276
>when will they learn
>>36538214
>>36538027
I'm with you m8, this is a physical as fuck sport in which you beat the living fuck out of your opponent old men with weak bones and knees are bound to get fucked, like they arent only going to lose but they are also going to get their shit pushed in real hard, Honestly I support the legalization of roids in legal sports 9 out of 10 athletes use them anyways
>>36529511
Silva knew he lost it and he nigged out and took the opportunity to steal a win like niggers do.
>>36538287
skinny dude doesn't know why people hold their knuckles up.
>>36538276
FUCKING B R U T A L
