If you owned a gym, what 3 rules would you enforce?
>>37902814
>no manlets
>no lanklets
>no females
I wish for infinite wishes
>>37902814
>No clothing
>5 min fap/schlick warmup is mandatory
>girls must meet me at the desk, pinch my nipples and say "thank you daddy" before entering
>>37902814
NO GIRLS
NO CLOTHES
NO HOMO
>no women
>no traps
>no femboys
Too distracting. End up looking at them instead of concentrating on my workout.
Doesn't help when they purposefully dress provocatively.
No slaming the weights.
No screaming.
No fun.
>>37902852
>wishes
>reading comprehension on point
>>37902814
>Rerack your plates
>No supersetting beyond 5ft radius
>Lose your spot/equipment/whatever after 4 minutes of no activity
>>37902862
>ein Volk
>ein Führer
>ein Reich
>>37902814
>hot chicks only
>no non-white men
>no women in weights area
>>37902814
I would not enforce them, but i would prominently display
>no curls
>no ab isolations
>no whining
>>37902939
No non-white men
No mention of non-white women....scared of getting cucked, sir?
>>37902880
>tripfag
>joke comprehension on point
>>37902944
>>no curls
>>no ab isolations
Curls are important for elbow joint health.
Ab isolation is often important in physical therapy.
Congrats on being on Starting Strength for two months, btw.
>>37902939
you scared of Juan and Tyrone boning your girl while eating tacos and watermelon, while you drink your milk and do 5x5 skuatz?
Whatever gives me the most money. Stupid edgy rules are for broke circlejerking manchildren
>>37902887
>>No supersetting beyond 5ft radius
This can often be avoided with an intelligent equipment layout, but yeah, there's sometimes that asshole that does some really weird ass supersetting.
I used to frequent a gym in PA where this old dude did this circuit consisting of a bunch of machines and at least two freeweights (usually the trap bar and a pair of dumbbells).
He would do one rep of a trap bar lift, some curls, then disappear into the machine section for a good 10-15 minutes, then come back and start back with the one rep. This would go on for an hour.
>>37902814
1) Re-rack your shit.
2) No deadlifts in the squat rack (ironically curls in the squat rack have not been a problem).
3) Take a fucking shower, with soap, within, at most, 24 hours of going to the gym. There's a few people super notorious in one of the gyms I frequent (I go to Gold's, one near my office and one near my apartment) that just do not shower or bathe ever. One dude stinks so bad his stench lingers for the next 30 minutes. It's so bad it's actually really fucking distracting, with people gagging and shit.
>>37902862
>>37902862
/thread
>>37903053
I used to see this guy who would use separate machines about halfway across the gym. He would disappear out of sight and come back demanding you leave if he caught you on the machine he was "using." You try not to interfere with someone's workout, but you can't help it if they are being that obtrusive.
>>3790281>>37902814
an alarm goes off when my gym don't sound like a torture room
If you're scared of getting recorded or being on someone channel who wants to help others gtfo my gym
any type of sport is encouraged (like power lifting/ body building (like if they wanted to practice posing go ahead)
Just no pussies desu.
>>37902814
If you can't do 1/2/3/4 plate then those are the only exercises you're allowed to do until you can.
Perfect form enforced by prowling, ripped wizards that actually know their shit. No ego lifting.
No vegans.
>>37902862
THIS
>no bulking beyond 20-25% bodyfat
>no "maintaining" at a certain weight, you have to progress or gtfo, even if it means bulking
>you must banter/meme inbetween sets
>>37902944
How is big legs more noble than big arms?
>'muh compounds'
all of this is a hobby and most likely not useful in your life
>Put the equipment back where it belongs
>No curling in the racks
>No niggers
>>37902875
Planet fitness already exists tho
>>37903034
Gee I wonder what kind of hat you use
>No drinking between sets
>Mandatory mirin
>Obligatory NO HOMO creed
Membership is free, you pay if you miss a day
Group size of 3 max
If you see someone literally one rep away from death by snap you have to video tape them so I don't get sued
>>37903358
And no women. They are just annoying.
It's my music - no pop or rap, and I listen to it so loud that headphones aren't going to help you.
Don't drop the bars/dumbbells - I've only ever dropped a bar once, and that's because a collar failed and half the weight fell off when I was at the top of a squat. It's a hazard to the bars and your health.
I am the opposite of Planet Fitness - you will show your bottle of Satan's Own pre-workout at the door or your ass will soon be halfway across the parking lot.
Satan's Own (tm) - guaranteed to turn you 1RM into your 5x5 and leave you feeling like hell the next morning.
>you have to be able to 4/3/2/1 in order to join and pass a strength test to do so
>you can't ohp in the squat rack
>you must wear professional weightlifting shoes
>>37902852
this fucking idiot
>>37902954
Why does he wear the mask?
>>37903489
Define a squat rack?
We have one cage in the whole gym that I use for squats and ohp.
How else do you do ohp without a rack at shoulder level?
>>37903602
Clean the weight faggot
>>37902862
>>37903640
>wasting energy cleaning
yeah no
>>37904009
>Wasting energy
>Cleaning
Pick one
dont you guys have extra jhooks on the outside of your racks?
>>37904023
you burn ATP and exert muscle movements to bring that barbell to your neck, so yeah there is energy wasted there
faggot
>no indians
>no currymunchers
>no pajeets
>>37904083
Nice high school bio, bud.
What I was implying, since nuance doesn't seem to be your specialty, is that cleans are an excellent workout so the energy is expended, but certainly not wasted.
>inb4 only cleaning it once
EVERY REP COUNTS FGT
>>37904124
Whatever asshole, Im not doing unnecesary shit if I can pick the barbell already at neck height
you must be DYEL status if you dont get tired of cleaning your working set weight, try going 1+ plate
>Only qts allowed
>Must have sex with the owner whenever he wants
>Must enjoy sex with the owner
>>37902989
Curls are actually bad for elbow health.
Compounds are better for core rehab work. Deadlifts > planks.
Also literally never did ss, only gslp, a ppl, and a u/l/u
>No admittance but by invitation
>Chalk provided
>Never closes
>>37902814
>no memberships within one week of new years
That should do it
>>37902827
so a gay bear bath house?
>Rack your weights
>Use machines as intended
>Fox only,no items, final destination
>>37904173
If you can't clean what you can OHP, somethings very wrong.
>>37904173
>1pl8 clean
> Tiring
Found the non athlete
>>37903034
>completely misses the point of the thread
no one bigger than me allowed
>>37906346
i think you mean
>no one on steroids allowed
mine would be
>NO GIRLS
>24HR
>TRY HARD AS H*CK
>>37902814
No deadlifts
No fit people
No exercising
I'd call it planet fatness and make bank off the thousands of soccer moms and fat cunts that would buy recurring yearly memberships and not actually come.
>>37904486
please shut up if you don't know what you're talking about bby
>>37904657
enjoy not making money and being poor :^)
>No string vests unless you can bench 3plate and sqaut 5plate.
>Chalk station to chalk your hands and shit,
>No hogging the weights by talking between sets.
>only people that believe in HAES are welcome.
>everyone eats at least 1 slice of pizza per session. If you don't, don't ever come back.
>DON'T SLAM THE WEIGHTS!
>>37903640
I don't have a baby ohp
1 rerack your weights
2 rerack your weights
3 rerack your weights
Rules will be enforced by camera. Violators will be given 2 chances and upon 3rd violation will have their membership terminated with no refund.
>>37904657
New year memberships pay the bills for the gym for the rest of the year
Grunts required. If you're lifting silently you're kicked out zero tolerance policy
>>37910483
Even when warming up?
>>37902886
Per la chancla
(1) Wipe down the equipment
(2) Time limit on the weights
(3) Be friendly
No poo in loos
Admittance by referral only
Getting big is mandatory
>>37902814
Women only
Dirty clothing must be discarded
Must be below 200lbs
Then I would sell the dirty clothing online to Japan.
>>37904811
Not everyone trains cleans...
Improperly cleaning 185lb is easily enough to hurt yourself.
>>37910697
enji needs to lose some weight tbqhfempaidesu
>>37902880
>>37902852
>>37902852
Top kek
>>37902814
Re-rack your weights in the proper place.
No circuit training allowed
RERACK YOUR FUCKING WEIGHTS.
>>37902814
>only curls allowed
>no eye contact
>everyone pees in the same toilet