Finally getting dem mires boys.
>be me
>become manager at the pool I guard at
>working out in off seasons
>lotsa cute 18yo lifeguards this year
>invited to lifeguard party
>everyone's drunk af, I'm a DD because alcohol kills gains
>drunk girl cuddles up on me
>"lowkey anon, you're so fucking hot I'd leave my bf for you"
>"y-you too"
>she tries to make out after party
>Still have conscience, decide not to
>she's still hitting me up
>I'm still dyelaf
This will fuel my lifts for weeks. Any good feels/Mirin' stories out there?
>>37659732
fuck her, you homo
>be me
>at ex coworkers bonfire
>sitting around the fire playing some drinking game
>wearing some sick cunt shorts
>girl notices my quads and pokes it
>"oh wow anon your leg is like all muscle"
>"t-thanks I workout"
>fuck her later that night
T-Thanks based SS T-Rex mode
>>37659779
Praise based Rip
>>37659732
Mirin Thread?
>at gym
>attempt new pr
>qt lifting babby weights not too far away
>ask her if she can spot me
>accepts
>achieve new pr
>'wow how many pounds was that?'
>2pl8 so 225
>'You must be good with numbers. Wanna know mine?'
>Gives me her number
>tfw didn't write it down
>tfw when I haven't seen her since
reminder these are the people posting in these threads
>>37659877
where did u get that pic of me?
>>37659869
Clever girl. You dun goofed m8.
>>37659869
Damn that's a nice line.
>>37659869
>he counts the bar
pussy
>>37659990
>he doesn't count the bar
Obviously you don't even lift.
>>37659990
>he doesnt count the bar
shut the fuck up weak ass dyel
>be me
>skinnyfat manlet
>haven't worked out since high school
>alcoholic, act nice to women, but also act like a know-it-all prick that can't ever be wrong
>they always mirin' my game and confidence
>find hot girls on tinder
>run my little texting game (differen't game for every girl)
>act interested for about 48 hours, texting and whatnot
>Wait for the cue something like this: girl "anon you're really cool:)"
>awe thanks you're really cool too :):) let's hang out
>grill comes over
>act nice to her
>netflix and chill on bed
>lock eyes with her
>go in for a little hand hold action to act romantic
>continue this for a few mins
>kiss her (if I get rejected here I just make her leave and jerk off, doesn't happen that way often tho)
>continue kissing, make out
>finger bang
>nail her like no tomorrow
>do this multiple times per week
>mfw ladies mirin'
>>37659996
2 plates is 180.
do you count how much the bar weighs when doing barbell curls too?
or your tampon when you do squats?
>>37660008
>fat alcoholic
>bang hot girls on the regular
and then you woke up
>>37660020
Lel, go lift the bar, it's 45 pounds, of course I count it. Fucking moron.
>>37660008
Mirin confidence and lifestyle desu senpai. Ever have any regrets about no relationship?
>>37660020
kill yourself you dyel faggot
>>37660020
here's your (You)
now kill yourself
>>37660044
>uses 35lb bar
>doesnt count the bar
>"bar weight doesnt matter bro it doesnt add anything like the weight you put on it bro"
obvious dyel
>>37660102
no, you kill yourself while trying to do 225 actual pounds on the bar.
weak bitch
>>37660020
sick burn bro. I felt it from here!!
>>37660128
maybe you would feel a sick burn if you actually put notable weight on the bar.
>>37659732
Cuck of be cucked
>>37660064
Ur dum
>>37659732
>Waking down hallway in jammers to swim with some girl who will probably never give it up
>run into another girl I know from uni
>catch her mirin my j00cy b00ty
>go downstairs and the mail girl sees me and comments on my outfit (already hit it a few weeks ago)
>meet up to swim with the girl
>she says I have a nice body and feels on my arms and lats
>nothing happened after I went up to her place and she kinda just said bye in a way that made it seem like me wanted me to leave
>I go to pick up my jump rope from another friend since I left it at his place like 8 montha ago
>the dudes girlfriend is at his place and she says I look really thin
>the dude is a chubbo
all the mires I had were ruined after that
>>37660020
Not all bars are the same weight. Lifting at a home gym with a non oly bar is not the same as lifting with an oly bar so you should count the bar
You are the kind of dude who lifts with a 20lb bar and claims 2 pl8
boiiiis, what is a dyel.
>>37660020
>or your tampon when you do squats?
obvious troll, but this line alone made it worth it. thx breh
>>37659990
Not all of us are wealthy enough to afford anti-grav barbells anon.
>Years ago in sophmore year
>I was a ed hardy wearing dbag
>worked out and lifted alot
>6/10 with a 8/10 ass tells me she likes my fashion etc etc
>wear a shirt that shows off my arms
>we were aquantinces i guess by this point because she always talked to me
>She just walk up to me wraps around my arm pulling it into her chest
>Omg anon your arm is really muscular
>She tries to pinch my arm for some reason
>Omg i cant even pinch it its really tight all muscle wow
>Tell her yeah ive beeb working out on and off for a few months (really it was consistant for 2 years but u couldnt tell her that)
>make out with her after school in the bathroom
>end up fucking her a few times in tge bathroom after school and a few times at parties
>we werent dating or anything i was just using her
>i moved away after i graduated
>i have her on facebook and she is currently a mother and married
>thinking about trying to fuck her when i go back to visit my parents
Should i guys? I would love to cuck some random guy lmao. Also her ass still looks nice and fat from the pics ive seen on fb.
>>37660253
Someone who doesn't even lift
>>37659732
You did the right thing anon, I'm proud of you. Don't be a beta bitch, but don't be a douchebag either.
>>37660289
Exactly i have never met anyone who dosnt count the bar wtf
>>37660306
If she's gonna cheat, she's gonna cheat. OP wouldn't be in the wrong for fucking her.
>>37660347
>Implying that knowingly encouraging deviancy isn't deviancy in itself.
Have some standards lads.
>>37660301
>>used to be a dbag
>>guys should I cuck him lmao!
You haven't changed faggot
>>37660387
Ehhh. Got to cuck someone once in my lifetime man. I mean she is still talking to me over fb and has been for awhile now. It dosnt sound like he is that great of a guy and he work alot so no harm no foul he probabaly wont ever find out anyway
>>37660480
>let me provide you with more evidence of what a turdgobbler i am
>>37660550
Turbo gobbler? I dont suck dick sorry man. Yeah know what since im getting this much backlash i guess ill go threw with it. Ill drop a big load on her ass for you /fit/ man now im kind of excited. I would if she will still let me fuck her asscheaks like a titfuck man that shit felt good as hell. Also ill still have to alteast seduce her a little bit. Hell she might bot bite but im atleast 80% sure she will. I originally just planned on visiting my parents and seeing a few old friends but ill squeeze her in she was begging to see me after all lol.
>>37659869
Alpha as fuck desu
>>37660480
Literally what is the point unless you look him in the eye when you cum in her then have him clean your dick (no homo)
>>37659779
Post shorts? They must be short enough to show quads.
>>37659897
Kek
>>37661076
Im not into thay kind of thing. I will fick her but im not going to ruin her family life or atleast not on purpose. Hell if it goes well i might even have her come see me sometime a few months later. Have her lie about it and say she is going to a friends or somthing idk. Btw she is hotter then she used to be imo. And you guys bitching about it made me want her more lol. Inb4 she dosnt want it
>>37661099
My guess is he had cycling shorts on or somthing compressed
>>37661111
Then why the fuck do you want to cuck him if not to look him in the eye as he realizes how much of a weak, spineless and useless cuck he is
>>37659774
lol hes such a faggot
>>37660020
please stop this meme
>>37661120
Idk i like the secret factor it gives me a tingle in my penis. It is to degenarate to just let him find out like that
>>37659869
But how do you spot OHP?
>>37661178
>i like the secret factor
You sound like a damn woman desu
>>37660301
>I would love to cuck some random guy lmao
insecure manlet detected
>>37661339
Uhhh no man. Im actually over 6'0 and im not insucre. I was when i was in junior high but not now. I may have body dysmorphia though
>>37660115
Rekt
>>37660020
I don't know about you, but I personally enjoy this meme. Makes all the summers so insecure.
>>37660253
D o
Y ou
E ven
L ift
>>37661394
>Gets called insecure
>Uhhh guys I'm totally not I'm like 6'0
Because insecurity only stems from height
>>37659774
>>37659732
OP is based. If you legitimately don't rate OP's actions and think he shoulda tapped that, you're never gonna make it.
>>37661219
Stand in front of the person, make sure your dingus' touch (no homo) be ready to catch the boner I mean bar if it falls.
>>37660040
lifting for grills is a meme you faggot, banged more being skinnyfat than now, probably because I'm fatty mchamson now :^)
>>37660040
Skinnyfat doable with bare facial genetics
>>37659732
>be going to gym at uni
>one day I'm not there, my treadmill buddy tells me this girl receptionist was asking about me.
>he said she asked if I was the guy who played guitar and sometimes goes to gym, knows I hang out with treadmillbro
>played with jazz combo before.
>f-fuck you m8 I love j-Jiz-I mean jazz
>she musta been mirin during performance in passageway bridge thing that connects buildings
>I don't pay attention to my surroundings when I play.
>pal said she said she thought I was "cool"
>works on Fridays
>I don't go to school on fridays
>Am told she might be a little chubby and maybe tan skinned
>first legitimate mire and don't even know how she looks like.
>mfw I don't give a damn, just want to lift and run.
>>37661178
you're just too much of a pussy to cuck properly
>mfw fucktoys bf calls when we smash
>I keep fucking her and make her moan when she's on phone with bf
>mfw they broke up few days later because she's a cheating whore
>mfw she tried to get together with me and now she's single mom with cucks kid
>>37660253
dyel - Do You Even Lift?
fat and weak people are called DYEL'S
>>37662053
(You)
>>37662057
lmao
What the fuck just happened fit.
>On my way to work
>Going my usual route, few stalls/shops
>One girl standing outside the shop who works there
>My arms are out, shirt tucked in looking decent cause my cut
>Holding bag in one hand
>She looks my way
>She mirin
>I look her way
>I smile
>She smiles
>I get a feeling that someone just electrocuted my heart
>It runs down my body to my feet
>Heart starts racing
>I keep walking to work
Did cupid just 360 no scope me brehs?
>>37662243
I have felt this feel on the train before. It's just a very mild form of autism. Random girls sometimes smile at me when I run. I almost always look angry or frown when I run.
>>37659869
>asking a girl to spot you
i don't understand.
>>37662262
Fuck this feel. If I had spoke I'd probably have spaghettid everywhere.
>used to be shredded years ago, got mired all the time
>let myself go, become fatty, no one mirin in years, virginity grew back
>decided to get fit again at all cost, work out for about 6 months, it's very discouraging because im still so far from where i was, but i keep going
>university is throwing a party but i dont care because im a cocoon mode fatty trying to get cut, got great gains and starting to be leaner
>go to uni gym on party night
>leave gym walking outside towards my car with dat dere pump
>can hear the music blasting, see lots of people walking the opposite direction to the party
>walk past people drinking, having fun, couples holding hands walking together
>one qt is visibly drunk with a group of friends walking toward me
>we lock eyes
>she stops walking and just stands there staring
>"damn... who are you?"
>"w-what"
"WHO ARE YOU?"
>"y-you too"
>one of her guy buddies in the group giggles and says something like "she just wanted to know your name my man"
>keep walking like an aspie
>dick semi-hard
>we're all gonna make it
>>37662426
>"WHO ARE YOU?"
top kek, almost chocked to death laughing
>>37662426
Should looked her dead in the eye, no expression. And said
>"A man has no name"
>"valaar megooles"
>Finish chest day late at night
>buddy invites me to some hipster show that night
>whatevs
>wear my smedium white tee and my 511's
>chest is swole, ass is poppin, and my dick is big and mean
>walking through hipster joint with buddies
>"damn! Work it, baby!"
>"hey, hottie! Come have a drink with me"
>getting my ass groped left and right
>girls grabbin my chest
>end up making out with some hot 18 year old poser
Fit is love, fit is life
>have old friend that I haven't seen in a year
>he invites me to stay over
>dress in well-fitted clothes
>head to his house
>he sees me walking while driving
>"yoo hoo sweetie how much an hour?"
>tell him it's free just for him
>I get into car
>he tells me how shapely [sic] my ass looked while I was walking
>t-thanks
>gave him a brojob in the car
>>37660137
Lul
>>37660301
Go find your abusive father and fuck him, then have him kill you.
>>37659990
>>37660020
nice, a lot of summerfags triggered. i kek'd gj mate
haven't posted in a bit
here are the highlights
6'4" 245ish if you don't know
>driving to work the other day
>rush hour traffic, it's fucking hot as balls and I'm sweating because I just stepped out of the shower before heading to work
>see a qt middle eastern chick looking at me, my age, maybe a bit younger
>she's still looking long after I started pretending not to notice or care about her looking at me
FUCK what does this bitch WANT?
>look over and just smirk a little bit
>she blows a kiss
Bitch you didn't even see my height and frame how would you even know..?
>qt 8/10 grill from a facebook fitness group I belong to messages me on facebook asking how I know a mutual friend of ours
>end up talking about how I met my gf
>mention that she was fit and I was dating up
>responds with "oh so she's an 11 then?"
MIRIN SHE JUST IMPLIED I WAS A 10
>at grocery store getting food for tonight's father's day dinner
>grab a watermelon because grandpa loves that shit FUCKIN LOVES IT and it's father's day, easy grandson points right there can't pass that shit up
>grab a 24lb one or something I can't remember what it weighed, but it was big and it was hard to make it look like I was carrying it easily
inb4 anything really fuck you I don't want to hear about you and your watermelon stories that's why I didn't ask. IT WAS AN AWKWARD 24lbs okay you lil shit?
Moving on
>cashier (she's like 40 and not really on the attractive scale at all (not bad, just not present kind of thing)) ringing me up
>she asks out of what must be habit if I want to take the watermelon in a cart out to the car
>smile at her and say that I think I've got it
>she just finally looked up from the groceries and sees me
>"Oh yeah, you look like you've got it... [long pause while I'm pretending to still punch in my phone number because I see her looking at me] you look STRONG."
>feel myself turn bright red and gtfo
eh I've got a couple more and I hit limit. Will post another if anyone is enjoying these.
>>37665313
Keep em coming senpai, miring's motivational af
>>37665313
Do tell family
>>37659998
>off by one
you could've been the chosen one
>>37665382
alright alright
>chillin with friends and senpai
>we order weed so when homie's dealer shows up I meet him, but don't get up from the couch, it's halfway across the room and standing up and shaking his had would have been weird and out of place
>later I get up to get another beer and I hear the dealer say to my buddy
>"holy shit man he's HUGE"
>kind of laugh out loud and say thanks
guys srs I have no idea what to say. I just thank them I guess?
>gf's sister tells me I'm a literal giant. All the time. And she's very specific about it not being just because I'm tall but because I'm gigantic
We get about one or two customers a shift that make a comment on how everyone working is jacked (one co worker is my height, 270, and probably has 7% more bodyfat than me. Dude looks huge for sure, and really not even that fat. Just thicc. The other one is 5'10", 190, and fuckin jacked. Like SteamRolan Jr.
>IG famous grill always comes up and chats me up
>she ALWAYS comments on my physique and how I should do bodybuilding
>she just won her first show (it was a huge deal) so I went up and gave her a hug and congratulated her
>she was bright red and all smiles
>she now likes all my IG posts and comments on them now and again
OH YEAH I started typing this out and ran out of room.
>check in a couple at work
>five minutes later the grill comes out and starts heading to the bathroom
>I look up and see her standing near the bathroom, out of line of sight of her date
>she signals me to come over with really weird body language I couldn't figure out wtf was her deal
>I walk over to her and ask what's up?
>Hey I didn't want to make it weird with my date but he's not my boyfriend and I was hoping to get your number before I go?
>"OH WELL HA HA MY GEE EFF DOESN'T LET ME GIVE MY NUMBER TO CUTE CUSTOMERS"
Fucking retarded answer but I was blindsided by the question
>>37660253
you
>>37661111
witnessed
>>37665566
what is your routine like bruv? im mirin
Everyone that posts a story should post a pic along with it, like the trip in here, otherwise it might as well be /b/
>>37665566
HEIGH FACE FRAME
>>37665623
Well, over a year ago I did a Russian high volume program called Sheiko. It was full body 4x a week. Did that for 7 months, put on a good amount of muscle, but didn't gain much strength, which wasn't expected but makes sense to me now as to why. I got impatient with Sheiko and switched to Candito's 6 week routine, which I had run for many cycles before. I put 25lbs on my squat in just 6 weeks because C6W was a glorified peaking routine for the muscle mass I put on in the previous months, if that makes sense to you.
I decided not to run the program again unless I 1.do a mega volume routine before it so I can "learn to use that muscle mass with heavy weight" with the following cycle of Candito's or 2. make a major change to the spirit of the program by doing maybe high bar or hatfield bar squats and more days dedicated to SLDL so I'm not deadlifting heavy as fuck more than every couple weeks
ANYWAY, I'm three weeks into a Norwegian 3 day high frequency program called Dietmar(bench, squat, deadlift, overhead, and rows plus accessories every day. I will continue to do this program until my meet in October so we'll see how it goes. Part of me knows now that the strength game invovles a LOT of patience. I want to max out all the time but I know that is only a detriment to my progress.
>>37665566
>she ALWAYS comments on my physique and how I should do bodybuilding
I exaggerated here and feel bad about it. She has, on several occasions complimented me on my "look" I guess.
>>37665673
I agree. That's why I do it.
Remember Pepperoni Nipples? He almost killed mirin threads altogether. Like, not just the cousin(15) memes, like he attacked the foundation of mirin threads. Pretty impressive if that was intentional
>>37665846
>the girl in the back looks away as you start the pull
bitch when somebody's pulling 6 plates you fucking look
>>37659732
Fuck your low res image
>>37661111
Dubquads. You must cuck him now.
>be skelly
>gifted by genetics gods with handsome face, dark hair, blue eyes
>never have to work for a lay, literally just show up wherever and stand around until a grill gives the signal
>rattle bones in satisfaction as I continue to pound 10/10 grills forever, never touching a weight in my life
>open an Instagram account
>do the shit bitches do (taking countless pictures and upload only the best)
>Tinder matches won't stop
>be kinda skinnyfat but some noob gains
>have good face (confirmed by gf and a few sloots)
>sign out at the gym
>reception staff is always like 2-3 qties
>walk out, overhear one of them say "he's kinda cute isn't he"
>rest agree
>randomly bump into qt3.14 on the bus, smiles were exchanged
>feel good for the rest of the month
>still insecure faggot years later
>>37660044
>>37660062
>>37660237
>>37660289
it really is summer
>>37662353
I've asked girls to spot me before if they were the only one in the gym. Just don't expect them to row the bar off your neck. She can call the ambulance, though.
>>37659779
amen
>6' 165
>noobgains
>still walk around in tank tops
>riding my razor to work
>any girl that smiles at me
>pull a u turn on my scooter, maybe bunny hop the curb if im feelin daring
>pull up tough and say something about her hair or whatever
>get number
>try and smash at her place
>i am homeless
>just kinda stick around her apartment as long as i can
>make food play my guitar
>free rent, free food, dont have to work
It goes good till one girl sees u with another in the city
>>37662353
If you are trying to set a new PR for instance, let's say you can max 135 on bench consistently (You're a DYEL), and want to try to lift 140, the girl only has to lift the 5 extra pounds to help the bar up.
>>37659869
Top kek
> take weekly tango lessons
> often get compliments about my arms from old ladies
That's pretty much it.
>>37665566
>>37665313
You should hop on test again.
>>37662359
Ditto.
>H-Hey, are you an a-archeologist?
>>37663263
>val-whore nice boobies
>>37666455
I have goals I want to reach first.
>>37665962
lec see that face of million dollars
>walking through college with an angry scowl cause it's sunny outside
>qt says "nice beard!" as she passes by
>glance at her and keep walking
>realize a second later she was talking to me
>t-too late to turn around now
>>37659732
>be me
>haven't seen roomate in a month
>I walk out of my room see him on couch
>he says "holy shit you doing p90x or something"
>"w-w-what?"
>He says "you're getting big as shit"
>laugh and walk back into room
I am completely DYEL, i only do body weight exercises. 200 crunches, 150 pushups + other shit a day but i'm not fooling anybody.
>>37666534
What goals?
>>37667110
at the very least a 6pl8 squat and 7pl8+ deadlift
also a few USAPL competitions under my belt before making the switch
>>37667387
>at the very least a 6pl8 squat and 7pl8+ deadlift
Are you serious?
You will never achieve that, you can't even squat 5 plates.
Now ex gf said my arms looked
>toned
Dropped that bitch so fast
>>37667402
Where are you coming from mother fucker?
>>37665962
Prove it.
do people seriously count the bar in their lifts?
>be e-stater
>put 1pl8 on each side
>count the plates (45lb each)
>count the bar (45lb)
>count your own bodyweight (200lb)
>HURR DURR I squat 335
its 90lb, idiot
>>37662426
kekd
>>37668170
delete this
>>37665313
>it was hard to make it look like I was carrying it easily
kek
>>37665566
Was that the IG girl that had a shoot at your gym and you sperged out getting her username?
>>37666654
Do you also do 100 squats and go for a 10km run?
>>37660960
Imagine if you will, gents, that this post isn't a troll post. This brainlet can barely read and spell, yet he'll still manage to breed. Facts like that make me wish we could press the nuclear reset button.
>>37666654
You can get pretty big when doing bodyweight on juice.
>>37668254
>>37668254
I've never seen a single episode of that shitty anime. I just don't have an adequate weight set and am a poorfag. My goal for next year is to be able to do a planche and freestanding handstand pushup.
Another one
>be me
>roomate works at mcdicks and constantly brings fresh (ugly/fat) meat to our house
>said meat this time is an overweight gross blob but with really huge tits and somewhat of an ass
>flirt with her a little while she says "yeah you have muscles, quite frankly you're hot"
>bitch wants the dick
A weeks later i tell my roomate to tell her "if she does our dishes i'll give her the dick
>fast forward a week later
>she comes over uninvited
>comes and sits down in my room looks me dead in the eyes and says "Well, guess i have to go do some dishes now"
>he told her, the absolute madman
>"y-y-eah... that's okay, i don't know what so&so told you but i don't like you like that"
>She says "i didn't think you did"
>awkword... she leaves
>smashed a more attractive CL slut later that night who said "you are stronger than you look" when i picked her up during sex.
KARMA
>>37667387
In how many years are you planning on achieving these goals?
>>37665846
Thank you for not being a douche and slamming the weights unnecessarily.
There's this asian dude at my gym who dead lifts a good amount, like 3 plates I think. But he fucking slams that shit so loud and then looks around to see if anyone notices him. I was hoping the barbell would bounce and land on his foot.
>>37668591
>KARMA
You did not throw some dick out for free housework?
Beta
>>37662426
>dick semi hard
my sides
>>37669188
>fucking hamplanet for clean dishes
yeah, nah...
>>37668170
are people seriously as retarded as you? kys my man...
>>37665846
Isn't it bad for you to start leaning back towards the end of your deadlift?
>>37665962
and then you wake up in the morning to your mom calling for breakfast?
>>37662353
>>>>>37666402
This. It's not like she has to hold the full weight, you aren't supposed to stop pushing Anon.
>>37660008
Tfw no house so I have to hope they'll fuck in my car after we go for a movie or coffee or some shit
>>37659732
K-Kyler?
>Its Ernie
>>37669188
Bro i'm telling you right now you would not fuck this beast.
>i would if nobody knew
>>37669161
>tfw deadlift three pl8 and end up dropping the last couple because grip keeps slipping
I-I'm sorry anon I just can't help it, I'm working on my forearms I swear
>>37660480
Already cucked someone Breh, it's worth.
>out of work for five days
>some vacation time
>get back to work
>a lot of girls ask me where i went or where i been
>work in a big company and encounter many of these qt's not so frequent or often
Not much of a mire but i felt good that some qt's at work asked where i been even though I don't know them much or barely see them
>>37662243
>>37662262
Can confirm, its an autistic trait
You'll get used to the qt's smiling at you though. Expect it happening atleast 3 to 5 more times
>>37661394
You should be insecure over how much of a retard you are.
You do understand on some level that you're an idiot, right?
>>37659732
You did the right thing OP
>>37659732
>cousin
>15
>pecs
>solid
>>37659732
>still have a conscience
She has a bf, not a husband.
>today, hanging out with one of my old friends from high school
>we go to lake with his friends, a couple of cute grills,kinda redneck
>walking around chilling shirtless, getting my tan on
>"hey anon! do you have a girlfriend?"
>haha n-nope
>hear her whisper to someone else "id be his girlfriend for a day"
>autismo so i pretended not to hear, but it felt good i guess
>later, someone else comments "anon's been working out"
I've been in caccoon mode for like the past year but maybe its finally time to get out there again boys. its cool how small things can make you feel awesome
>>37668715
As many as it takes. That's half a pl8 on my deadlift and just over a pl8 on my squat so hopefully not more than 2
>>37668242
Nah and I didn't sperg out you nerd she just didn't know what "the 'grams" was
>>37667402
Kek okay bby
>>37669479
Eh yes and no
Happened to me years ago.
>be prof
>aiming for bearmode as end goal
>middle of bulk so fatty. Muscles in arms doesn't show unless I flex
>school fair
>wedding booth
>"sir anon, Anne (15)has a huge crush on you. Go get married haha lol jk"
Sure why not
>Honestly bored out of my wits because I'd rather teach than do club work
>Anne and I goes to the wedding booth set up by students
>students there are hollering at us
>we get pseudo married and priest-student tells me I can kiss the bride
>kiss her on the forehead because I'm not a pedo
>she also hugs me afterward
>"sir anon! your body is so hard."
>not a pedo so couldn't have been my dick
>other girls surround and playfully hug me
>"your right, his body is hard to touch."
>lol wut
>go home and start touching my sides, abs, arms, etc.
>literally it's soft because of I'm bulking/fat
What the hell did they mean when they said my body was hard? I wasn't stiff or anything.
>>37660020
No I literally hold just balance the plates on my head
>>37665313
Ayyyy. Sup m80.
>>37669481
Really? That's all you got?
>>37670793
I bet you've been asked that before
>>37660020
I can't believe people still fall for this.
Almost as bad as the 45lb plate not being 45lbs because of the hole.
ok seriously, do you count the bar or not? i've been on here and lifting for a few years and i've never counted the bar. all my stats i've recorded and payed attention to only the weight i put on the bars. for example when people ask how much i OHP i'll just say 1pl8 because there's 45 on each side, so i lift 90 pounds. does the bar really way that much? or is it an ego thing. how do you tell how much different bars weight?
is that why it says i'm still beginner/intermediate with my lifts?
>>37670808
Damn, I thought the meathead thing was a stereotype but you're slinging burns straight out of recess. That's kind of sad.
>>37662018
Just go for her, you'll get experience.
>>37670869
I won't tell you. Figure it out yourself, just know one of them is a meme
>>37670869
here's a hint
do you lift the bar
>>37670869
The bar weighs something and you lift it, so you count it. I try to consistently use the same bar because I know it weighs 45 pounds. Some of the bars out there will weigh less, and you can even weigh them to check. But yes, you do count the bar.
>>37660347
>"he'll end up oding in heroin anyway, just sell him some, you wouldn't be in the wrong."
>>37671204
>>37671140
>>37671076
so how do i weigh my bar without a scale? it's one of those big ones that has the larger ends. olympic i think, but do they all weigh the same?
>>37671326
Standard bar weighs 135 pounds. So 1 plate is actually 135 + 45 + 45 = 225 lbs
/fit/ i need ur help I have no 1 else to talk to about this
>be me, kissless virgin
>match with girl on tinder, lesbian for her whole life, never been with a guy, she wants come over and hook up
>hell ya
>she comes over, super hot way hotter then her pics, we make out a bit, she gives me a hj and I eat her out for a bit
>i put a condom on takes a bit to get going but eventually we have sex in missionary, and with her on top
>lose my boner a lot, mostly because im super nervous and probably some kind of death grip
>I dont cum and I dont think she does either
>i jacked off the night before and in the morning, so we go for about an hour and fifteen minutes then she says her vagina is starting to get sore
>at least im not a kissless virgin anymore r-right guys
anyway she told me that she doesnt regret doing it and it was kind of a new experience for us both. but I cant help but think she does regret it based on how she is messaging me now. in the end it doesnt really bother me that much because at least i got to have sex but still i cant help but feel a bit guilty if she regrets doing it
>>37671339
>all my lifts just went up 45lbs
>tfw i'm not as inadequate as i thought i was
what a fucking relief.
>>37671382
just remind her you were a virgin and sex takes practice, like everything.
>>37671382
If you haven't told her that you were a virgin, do so.
If you already did just move on, she likes girls, done't get fucking feeling for a tinder match.
I got a few
>lunch break
>decide to get bowl from chipotle
>a few chicas working the counter
>one of them finishes another order and as she looks up at me her eyes widen and she smiles with a flirtatious "heey"
>she rings me up
>doesnt charge for the guac, order costs $3 less than normal
anothah
>video of me goes somewhat viral
>Check comments periodically to get ego boost
>comments like "What a handsome man!" or "I'm more impressed by his definition than what he did" and other people mirin
>>37671394
oh sweet summer child
>>37670334
solid
>>37671469
>always go double brown rice double black beans double chicken lettuce burrito
>without fail someone always comments on it
>"oooh they're gonna be mad at you!" (talking about the person that has to rap this)
>one time, massive black guy in front of me in line getting a lot less: "damn do you play sports or something?"
>"damn son are you gonna eat all that?"
>tfw small as fuck
>>37671590
just get 2 burritos asshat. or a bowl. you have no idea how annoying it is to struggle with those thin ass tortillas.
>>37671469
Post video
>>37671590
i've read this pasta before.
>>37668591
>OPM
>Shitty
>>37671748
I don't understand your post
>>37671657
I would if it didnt have my name in the description
>>37671302
I know you're being sarcastic but I don't know why... That's is how it works kiddo.
>>37671620
double rice and beans is free though
why would I buy a whole other burrito
>>37670334
>solid
>>37659732
jesus /fit/ is full of complete retards
>>37670816
AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
how do people fall for that bait
>>37660020
nice b8 m8
>>37660020
this is a mirin thread, your looking for the "wish you were her" threads over in /gif/
>>37671394
What the fuck? How could you be so summer? A "standard" bar is like 100 pounds not 135. Olympic bars go from 135 to 170.
>>37670270
You can squat 5 pl8 and deadlift 6.5 pl8 after like two years of training.
That's pretty amazing desu.
Imagine if you started when you were 18 instead of in your mid to late twenties
>>37673071
Wot, standard oly bars are 20kg
>>37665926
>long beach islam?
>>37662243
had that happen to me too
it seems like I will never leave the tism behind
>Forget to wear pants
>Joocy as fuck (everyone mirin')
>Qt Latina with tiny booberts comes up to me
>"Nice quads :3"
>"Y-you too" I stammer out
>Wake up
>Look in mirror
>Skinny chicken legs
GRRRAAAAHHHHH
WHY WON'T THEY GROW?? I LOOK LIKE AN OVERCOMPENSATING MANLET WITH PIXIE STICK LEGS AND A LARGE CHEST. I LOOK LIKE A MANLET MOUSSE SNOWCONE FOR FUCKS SAKE. (Started doing SS last month, hopefully it'll fix me)
Pray for me brehs
>>37673761
Legs are like the easiest thing to grow my dude, just squat heavy, literally all you have to do.
>>37666503
Kek
>>37666576
Bearded bro as well
>at a music festival
>""""cutting"""" because I'm poor and eat PB&J 2x per meal
>brotein helps the beard
>some short haired chick starts talking to me about how good I look
>she braids my beard
>She buys me beer
>leave her as rain starts
>go get high with a couple mixed chicks
>one starts comparing me to her husband
>NOTHING GOOD is said about him for 45 minutes while compilmenting me
>straight up demeaning stuff like "I would cum so hard on his dick" "you can wait in the other room"
>get REALLY uncomfortable even though I'm a homewrecker
>laugh and thank them for the weed.
>go to local bar for memory bleach
>engaged coworker seems a bit bored with her fiance
>starts flirting with me
>end up sleeping with her about a month ago
>afterwards, tells me her fiance doesn't care
>have ongoing workplace affair
>last week
>waitress at favorite indian restaurant asks me if I "come here often"
>confused by question
>she already knows how often I come here
>starts talking to me
>gives me her number
>go on date
>sleep with her
>might start dating her
I'm actually more concerned about the latter situation. If things go wrong, I can get another job, but I can't get another favorite Indian restaurant.
>>37673928
Two situations, same advice.
Don't shit where you eat.
>>37670816
>mfw he doesn't lift weights at sea level
>>37670869
>curled 20kg today
>according to anon I lifted nothing
>>37673952
Probably a good idea!
>>37670869
Its not counted in actual competition but i guess its fine for getting your confidence up in the early days
I would have to know her boyfriend before making the decision. If he is a respectable guy, then no go on the pogo, but if he's just another shitty doucher, all's fair.
Got chest mires from people who hadn't seen me since teenage years
Barely not dyel but still feels good desu
>>37674079
I disagree. If you're gonna fuck girls with boyfriends/fiances/wives, just come to terms with who you are.
>>37674079
if a slutbag cheats in her partner you are a delusional faggot for thinking she wont cheat on you.
>>37674079
Fuck her!
If he is an idiot he deserved it.
If he is a respectable guy he does not deserve a cheating whore as a girlfriend so you are doing him a favor.
>>37659774
lol you are a homophobe. You have to go back.
>>37668170
t b h q in scientific terms it's the newton you emit downwards which would count your bodyweight too
>>37674079
If you are not going to fuck her. She is going to fuck another person that comes around. Might as well as do it
>>37660020
Bait4summer
>>37670869
Holy fuck count the bar.
If this is b8, well meme'd.
>still dyel
>very high meth abuse in my area so still above average
>still getting through noob gains
>people say I'm quiet and mysterious and shit
>girl at work says I'm getting buff
>pisses me off slightly because I'm motivated by negative reinforcement
>secretly love it but compliments make me complacent
>she keeps finding excuses to touch me etc and flirt with me over next few weeks
>one day she says "hey anon, want to go to dinner and a movie or something on the weekend?"
>gym meme works
>Automic bomb in T-minus 2 seconds
>"Depends on who with?"
>Realise a split second before she walks off she was asking me out
>"w-wait, I was caught off guard"
>>37662426
>dick semi hard
lmao bro
>>37664985
christ
>mom tells me I'm getting big and feels my shoulder and traps, slaps my butt
T-thanks mom
>>37668591
>not letting her wash the dishes then throwing her out
>Be turbo-autist
>So autistic I would put most of /fit/ to shame
>Buy new clothes after I started to look relatively good
>My shoulders and arms are a real tight fit, the contours are very nice and I mire myself in the mirror for a bit (nohomo)
>Go to uni
>I look at the ground the whole time because that's what I do
>Swallows are playing in a small puddle
>They're just so cute and tiny, I bet they wouldn't even be worth killing because I'd expend more energy
>I slow down and smile, take it all in
>Petite redhead qt I recognize from uni in a summer dress walks towards me, looks at the same puddle
>I look at her, she looks at me, we both smile at one another and she blushes slightly
>My heart skips a beat and I feel like I'm about to suddenly die so I start walking quickly away
Is this what real life is like, /fit/? I gotta say, it's pretty nice.
>>37662426
As a non-summer fag i can say this sir, i've seen this story posted b4.
>>37670816
>Almost as bad as the 45lb plate not being 45lbs because of the hole.
kek
>>37673206
Thanks anon
>imagine
Don't remind me D:
I wish I could go back and compete juniors.
It's alright, there are plenty of old guys that are strong and I still have time to get to decent numbers
>>37673963
how the fuck?
>>37660008
My brother has a short fat friend who has fucked more girls than my whole social circle just by being polite, being open about his intent and being confident. It's ridiculous.
not mire but social gain story
>today at work, lunch break
>alone because stuff
>see qt I met weeks earlier eating w/ her colleagues
>fuck it, go and sit next to her
guess what I'm not as autistic as I tought, had some cool talk BUT I just found out it was her last day as a stagist, so I'm probably not gonna see her ever again BUT whatever It felt good :---)
>>37670793
this board is for lifting, you numale beta low test faggot
>but muh handsome
get out newfag
>>37659732
Fuels your fag meter for sure.
>>37675504
Bahaha this made me shit myself
>>37665313
You are literally a tub of lard, holy fucking inflated ego haha. You think everytime someone makes eye contact they are checking you right. Wish I could live in your fantasy land for day fatso.
>>37675890
Would you recommend doing sheiko's program as a natty?
>>37676473
Yeah, definitely. It didn't put a whole lot on my total but I kept inflating my maxes when it got easy so I overreached and never gave myself a chance to recover. It put a lot of muscle on me though
>>37659990
let's not do this again ayy
>>37661116
yep definitely autistic enough to wear these to a get together with friends
>>37676507
another anon here, I want to start a intermediate routine, texas method or sheiko?
>>37671469
Are your initials ES?
>>37659990
>>37660020
>>37660137
I like you
>>37676535
TM if you can still progress on that. Add in accessories after ID and main sets on VD. Then consider Candito's 6 week or Sheiko. Or Dietmar. Dietmar is pretty fucking cool. Pic related as an example. It's pretty easy on paper just like Sheiko but the workouts drag on a bit
>>37676596
thanks.
>CHAD grabs another slice while YOU can't even figure out if you count the bar or the hole
>be me
>get home from 2 hour workout
>very hungry, so I order a lot of takeout
>food comes
>fat indian man gets out of car and gives me a once over
>goes to grab my food from the backseat and says "Wow this is so heavy, maybe you can grab it. You look strong. Lots of food for you my friend" (read in Apu voice)
>laugh nervously and say thanks
d-d-does it count guys?
>>37675504
>solid
>>37660301
>ed hardy wearing
>she likes my fashion
kek
>at work
>help girl out with a computer problem
>she says that it would be awesome to have a guy that knows so much about computers at home too
>just laugh at it and be done with it
Does she want the D?
>>37665846
do you have a job/college aswell or? impressive either way
>be me
>invited to some club in Hollywood. CA
>Ohboyherewego.jpeg
>turns out to be all rap, predominantly black
>no big deal, make the best of it
>more of a latina guy, if i say so myself
>rocking my teal chad dress shirt, jeans and steve madden boots
>only white guy there
>group of black girls come up and start asking why I'm here
>"I like my women how I like my coffee; black with a shot of cream"
>they all start howling and jumping around
>mfw they compliment my style
>mfw they compliment how big my chest was
>mfw can bench two plates
>felt pretty good that night.
>>37678561
Black women love white guys. The problem is there are not many attractive black girls but as soon as you spot one and approach her you've already in a good position because they never get approachen by white guys.
>>37674038
yes it is.
wow im actually retarded enough to answer on this fucking troll thread
>>37678621
valid point. deleted my other post because the photo was sideways.
>>37678601
>and then I woke up
>>37678601
Ch-chad?!
>>37678621
It's a real shame. I just do not like african features. I like my women to have nose bridges.
But a black girl with white features, wew lad.
>>37660301
holy white trash
>>37676745
ayy lmao
>>37665962
>tfw handsome, dark haired, blue eyed but manlet
I get a decent amount of mires but sometimes it feels like the genetic gods wanted to give me all this good shit then fuck me at the end for shits and giggles.
