How do I up my charisma level /fit/? Like I never know what to say or the correct reference that everyone else is getting at.
It kills me.
Be 110% sure that whatever you say or do is the absolute right thing at any given moment.
Imagine you're under direct orders
from God himself. Hell, imagine you are God.
>>37451302
>Be 110% sure that whatever you say or do is the absolute right thing at any given moment.
But anon how the hell would I know this. I'll just keep silent unable to think of a funny, witty thing to say.
meditate and do positive affirmations
you automatically say cool things when you are relaxed and confident. it won't come about by overthinking it
>>37451319
>unable to think of a funny, witty thing to say
stop thinking about it
>>37451328
How do I meditate?
And is it bad that I try to never smile. I have REALLY crooked teeth and with an overbite and it just ruins my jaw.
>>37451319
It doesn't matter what is objectively true or not, you just need to believe that you are always right in what you say or do.
In the sense that you can't second guess yourself while interacting with people.
>>37451358
the fact that you're "trying" to think of what to say and "trying" not to smile and micromanaging yourself makes you come off like a sperg. just relax.
>how do I meditate
look up some guided meditation on YouTube until youre comfortable doing it alone
>>37451358
Focus on your breath
>>37451260
Lol why couldn't this dude speak actual English, what did he think it would be catchier if he butchered the hell out of it?
>>37451373
Does alcohol help?
>>37451596
might make you more sociable for a few hours but it's not going to do anything for you in the long term
>>37451614
What about alcoholism?
>>37451625
go for it
Autism: The Thread.
>>37451593
It's called rhyme, meter.. also rhythm. Get some.. and you might be more like him.
Faggot
C O C A I N E
O
C
A
I
N
E
>>37451349
>>37451614
alright I'm gonna butt in and say some people just can't follow this advice.
i had a housemate in college who was absolutely shredded and not bad looking, kinda short tho. the kid was a fucking mess socially.
we threw a small get together at the house and he got drunk and was just being himself, which happened to be /pol/ incarnate. needless to say he alienated himself and ended up causing a ton of people to leave. this kinda thing happened a couple other times in smaller contexts and the kid was never invited anywhere as a result of it.
i would say keep quiet as shit if you're awk and just fucking observe. a quiet dude is nowhere NEAR as bad as a fucking awkward as shit sperg ruining conversation and making everyone cringe.
another piece of advice: NO NEGATIVITY (at least at first). stay quiet and everything you say should be positive. when you're new to a group or situation you tend to be critical and negative. SUPPRESS THAT URGE YOU STUPID SPERG
BE POLITE AND NICE. if you accidentally let it slip that you like anime, no one is gonna really give a shit. you do your thing, not hurting anyone. if you let it slip that the whole PC movement is composed of mostly landwhales, people will be mad and will remember that awkward shit.
>>37451680
Why would I want to be dead?
>>37451260
>>37451721
I agree with this Anon to some extent. Being polite to everyone is important, especially if you don't like them. Sometimes you'll turn out to make friends with people who seem like jackasses at first.
To truly master social skills, you need to learn how to manipulate people. That doesn't mean getting them to be your bitch, it just means you need to learn what YOU CAN SAY and HOW OTHERS REACT. Master that.
YOU SAY -->> OTHERS REACT
This is the basis of social manipulation. Look at people's faces when you're talking, memorize facial reactions. It's probably easiest to start with learning to tell a real smile from a fake smile, there should be a bunch of stuff on the internet about it but basically real smiles are with the eyes, fake smiles are just a mouth movement.... Hence the phrase, "smile with your eyes!"
Laughter is usually a good sign but people can fake laugh too. If they laugh and then make their own related comments, that's good and real. If they laugh and the change the subject right away or they make related comments but turn away from you to somebody else, that means it was a fake laugh.
Follow YOU SAY -->> OTHERS REACT long enough and you'll start to internalize these things and they'll come naturally.
Fucking texting or e-chatting RUINS me because I have no idea what the other person is feeling and I lose all my charm. If any of you anons have any advice on that I'd love to hear it.
>>37451260
You have legitimate autism. Seek treatment
people don't want to here you complain, so don't talk about things that you hate.
>>37452339
>>37451721
Thanks guys. Noted.
>>37452364
>>37451676
Why?
>>37451260
First of all, stop saying "like" so damn much. You aren't a 15 year old girl so stop talking like one. Recently I've been seeing a lot of people writing that way on purpose. It's idiotic, and makes you seem immature and vapid.
Not everything is a video game. You don't "level up" things.
I can pinpoint your exact problem:
>Like I never know what to say or the correct reference that everyone else is getting at.
>I'll just keep silent unable to think of a funny, witty thing to say
>And is it bad that I try to never smile. I have REALLY crooked teeth and with an overbite and it just ruins my jaw
You're self-centered. Everything in your mind revolves around you. You don't need anything witty to say, or worry about anything else. When someone talks you just need to listen to what they're saying. Take a genuine interest in other people.
The rest will sort itself out once you stop being so self-conscious.
>>37452436
Being unable to pick up social cues and read expressions is a major signifier of autism.
I'm not talking 4chan autism I mean actual pathological rain man shit.
Seek treatment.
10/10 thread
>>37451260
Escape from reality. Become a confident character that you made up. Flip into that character when the situation calls for it. Then become a hermit when you're not around others.
Literally what 99% of the outgoing people you see are like.
>>37451405
this
plus look them in the eyes and say what you mean
>>37452440
>Take a genuine interest in other people.
Never thought of this, but could this be the key? I believe it's important do "be" stuff - like interested, happy or relaxed - and not to pretend something.
>>37452339
Good fucking post m8
>>37452453
Allow me to contribute
>>37453754
More
>>37453763
>>37453754
Thats the last one guys
Hope this shit helps you
Leaving social anxiety can't be done in a couple of weeks or so
It requires you to drag yourself out of yor comfort zone to try new things this world has to offer and while doing this you must fight/ignore your demons
Sometimes you win the fight and sometimes you lose the fight but thats the ups and downs of life
Always carry mints and be the guy that people see when they want a breathmint
There's a book called Charisma on Command by Houpert that seems pretty good, though I haven't read it yet.
How to Win Friends and Influence People helped me out a lot.
>>37453812
like Doublemint Dave? that guy is grteat
>>37453754
can't download, resend pls?
>>37451260
Alcohol. At least for me
>>37452634
Good advice. Alcohol brings up confidence too
>>37451260
>that quote
>>37453754
This is a good starting spot if you suck at that sort of thing, but most of the facial expressions are greatly exaggerated so you'd probably have trouble making the connection between the diagram and IRL. A couple of them are kinda wrong, "boredom" in particular looks more like, "Did you really just say that?" as if you told a stupid joke or made a pun.
I've found "body posture" to be mostly bullshit. I cross my arms a lot, it just happens when I'm standing around and don't know what to do with my arms. I notice because I've heard before from other sources that it's "defensive" so I try to uncross my arms when it happens. I don't think body posture means anything unless the person is feeling strongly about something, and in that case it should be very obvious from their facial and verbal clues. E.g. if someone crosses their arms because they're feeling defensive, they will already have been showing concern on their face for some time.
>>37453763
Idk how many people this advice would help but it's not terrible. Look at Obama, he has a very halting method of speech. There is a catch to this advice though, which is that you can't pause for too long if you want to add something funny or timely to the conversation. Timing is important with humor, you'll look like a tool if it takes you ten seconds to come up with a comeback or add something on to a previous statement. You'll have to practice to figure out how long you can wait and still be timely, maybe it would help to count in your head? idk.
>>37453789
These are good tips but they're hard to get right. You can't just throw those tricks around and expect them to work right away, you need to make them sound natural. (That is, don't suddenly pull one of them out of your ass in the middle of a random conversation, you need to already be talking about the subject you're interested in and slip them in).
>No I'm sorry Anon I don't want to hang out with you anymore. You're only fun when your high.
some chick said this to me a few months back and it still fucks with me. All I do is work, school, workout and try and cook/bake.
I don't even smoke weed anymore, so I guess I'm gonna be that boring guy.
fuck me
>>37451721
No way this is real. No one is this stupid. I'm /pol/ incarnate myself but even if I've gotten so drunk I could barely stand up straight I kept my filter on.
>tfw making it
>tfw i fucked a girl and now she's talking all that love shit but i don't feel for her
help, guys? this is uncharted territory for me, what the fuck do i do?
>>37451721
Good advice, but I've gotten away with my political beliefs many times (all the time actually). I have very unorthodox political opinions. Granted I don't wave my opinions in their faces when I first meet them.
>>37458652
I had this problem recently. I was also feeling very insecure. I think its normal to not feel a very strong bond at first. I might go as far as saying that i have some trust issues and i think quite a few people here on electronic baums copyshop have it. I ended up leaving her since i felt some crazy vibes and i felt like nothing good would come out of this if i kept it up for a longer time. My dick still regrets letting it go though and i havent pulled in 2 months.
Whatever your situation is i think you should try figuring out why you would want to stay with her/ leave her. Potentially even write it down if you wanna have a good weigh in of emotional baggage.
>>37458953
yes, this seems good. thanks for the advice, dude.
it's not as if she's crazy but she just seems kinda needy and i don't have time for that. especially since i want a different woman but i can't have her.
no wonder normies don't get shit done, this shit is exhausting.
>>37459021
No problem man. I felt like ranting about this for a while now lol.
I was also surprised in regards to how much time was consumed by being together with someone. I can relate to the feel of needyness going off from the girl. Sometimes i felt more like a shrink then a partner. Ironically we had a pretty similar past depression wise etc. But while she said that she was done with all of her problems it was pretty damn obvious she wasnt done with any of it at all. I felt like i wouldve behaved just like her in the past. Blaming others and smoking nonstop to deal with the pain. For some reason i was almost disgusted when i saw that behaviour from her. Guess we cant all turn our life around. The whole thing made me realize how much i just want a non crazy normal gf.
