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You are currently reading a thread in /fit/ - Fitness
You are currently reading a thread in /fit/ - Fitness
So, I'm bringing this to you all because /x/ mods have their heads up their ass.. how would you train physically to battle the paranormal? I'm not talking about lame shit like ghosts and demons, those guys are easy as fuck to battle and you don't need any muscle
>NOTHING CAN STOP THE CRUSADE *slings holy water*
I'm talking the legitimately fucking unnerving shit. Xenomorphs from the Alien series. The Doppleganger from It Follows. The Things from The Thing. And last but not least, motherfucking Predators.
Would you be tough enough to take this shit on? How would you routine reflect your efforts to go toe to toe with the challenges creatures like these pose?
Be reborn as Guts
>>37429297
He's cool and all but how would he stand against shit with acid for blood or nuke gauntlets?
Imho I'd finally get good at cardio and just try to outrun everything
When fighting creatures driven by instict you have to be aware that these animals have better senses than you. They are stronger bigger and more cunning than a straigjt forward meathead. What all those creatures fear is something big or intimidating.
>So you have to be big, what else?
You should have been in a multitude of fights and battles, street hand-to-hand fights and war zones so you keep your adrenaline in check.
>calmness of the mind, what else?
Being quick and agile, having the ability to dodge incomeing claws requires foresight and matrix like reflexes or you bring so big you can take it (which given by the nature of the human skin wont do much since broken skin = infection)
Basically you have to be a 7'0 + build spirited wise person
You have to literally leave humanity behind.
>>37429062
Some sort of military training. Mostly weapons training, learning to function under stress, something like obstacles and maybe parkour for cardio. Some close combat training, a bit of strength training.
A lot of food and prehab.
You need to learn to fight, move, handle stress, avoid injuries. You can't beat in CC anyway so rely on weapons and tactics and cooperation.
/x/ is pretty bad desu, only go there for /div/ now. I'd say weapons training, you're not gonna beat a supernatural beast to death with your fists, shooting at it has a better chance of doing something for sure.
>How to defeat something that uses tech that's lightyears ahead of ours in terms of advancement
You don't
>How to defeat something that can run faster than average family car, has insanely sharp claws, acidic blood, is nearly indetectable even when in your close proximity, and is extremely fast and agressive predator driven by strong feeding instinct
You don't
You just hope you have a bigger gun
>>37429346
Faggot.
>>37429346
So basically you're saying I have to be the offspring of a predalien produced by a facehugger born from an egg that was special because Neo fucked a Xenomorph.
Damn I think I'm pretty screwed this lifetime.
>>37430439
Oh, and jedi training. Imma need jedi training to top it off.
>>37430462
And adamantium bones and a healing factor
>>37430492
>mfw gotta be all that + Wolverine
Confirmed for totally screwed, bub. I'm not even into drinking beer like that.
>>37430510
Top kek 10/10 story
>>37430510
Just read this whole damn thing to my girl. We both had the same response but she worded it better.
"Wow..that is some awesome ass shit"
No amount of physical training is going to help you beat those enemies. You could deadlift 500kgs but it's still not going to help. There's no way you'll be able to physically fight any of those creatures. The only training you should be considering in that situation is cardio. Because you're going to be doing a lot of fucking running away.
>>37430510
dis nigga a diablo crusader
>>37430510
That's awesome
>>37430746
If a predator can stand up to an alien with his bare hands and a claw, if niggas in africa solo hunt lions with spears, if bitches wrestle bears and gators for show, I feel like I could fugg a predator or xenomorph up with some glorious nippon steel.
The japanese make the greatest swords the world has ever seen, and if a master swordssmith perfected one and gave it to any average joe his fighting capabilities would be enhanced tenfold.
All he'd need to do after obtaining the sword is diligently train with rigorous cold showers and protect his head with a stylish hat of some sort.
>>37430899
Why'd you try so hard to go full fedora
>>37430928
Because I train not for "aesthetics" my friend, but for FUNCTIONAL strength
>>37430510
alpha. as. fuck.
>>37430510
>epic
>>37429062
Bump because if im not browsing /fit/, im browsing /k/ and have always wondered about trying to hunt down a skin walker.
obviously need more knowledge and
>guns
>preferably night vision
>mental strength
>physical strength and endurance
>high situational awareness
>reflexes
>badass motherfucker mindset
>>37432007
>guns
Shotty main, six shooter secondary
Honestly between getting good as fuck at shooting from the hip and practicing speeding up my reload speed, I'd say a shit ton of cardio and endurance training would work wonders. I'm talking about getting on that Borderlands grind
>always keep moving
>always keep blasting
Also since I personally believe predators are less likely to fuck your shit up from long range as long as you don't come at them with a gun, I'd keep either a machete & hatchet on hand
Skinwalker wise though, the hardest thing about hunting them is identifying the real ones from regular bums/homeless/hermits and normal wildlife.
The monster from It Follows though? Just run. Run and trap that bitch somewhere. Or, you know, get to know the person you're fucking b4 u fugg em
>>37430510
>total of 13 holes at this point
>>37432007
bump for this, fellow /k/ommando
as far as i can tell though fighting skin walkers wouldn't "require" strength. i would assume one should train for endurance to be able to outlast an attack by those fuckers. i don't think we could come close to thier strength, i mean the can rip deer in half and throw the body with ease. possible routine
>rifle curls 5x5
>full kit squats 5x5
>full kit ruck to hunting area (during day time, to make sure you can Mogadishu Mile it home) don't forget the important stuff like proper fetal position form or any/all forms of white ash.
though i drunkenly went hunting for em last weekend in a night desert parka, my undies, shitty chink plastic elvis glasses(like rays from generation kill) flip flops, and a becker bkII taped to a broom handle speaking pirate speak
>>37429062
JUST PULL OUT A GUN
>>37432007
Also Just need to remember= Nothing to be afraid of.
Why would something that goes bump in the night be afraid of another bump in the night? You cannot be scared when you are the monster.
>>37432361
>i drunkenly went hunting for em last weekend in a night desert parka, my undies, shitty chink plastic elvis glasses(like rays from generation kill) flip flops, and a becker bkII taped to a broom handle speaking pirate speak
fucking what!? What area of the country are you in?
Also from the stories, skinwalkers dont seem to like .308 very much, fire, or incendiary stuff.
>must acquire a 45/70
>carry lever action 45/70 with 12ga loaded with incendiaries/dragons breath
>>37432415
>you either are the bump in the night or you're terrified of the bump in the night
>>37429341
>just try to outrun everything
aliens and predators can outrun any human.
>>37429062
>The Doppleganger from It Follows.
The only way to deal with that thing is to fuck something. That was pretty clear from the movie.
And generally, when dealing with things that are larger and stronger than humans by orders of magnitude, the only things that significantly improves your odds of winning a fight or even surviving an encounter are going to be force multipliers like that Mech thing Ridley used to kill Alien. Being in better shape won't HURT your odds, but even then the best thing that will do is improve your ability to get away, not really fight the enemy worth shit.
You need some combination of high caliber, high capacity guns, heavy armor (either like a tank, or even better, some sci-fi battle armor crap that wouldn't make you a huge, lumbering target like a tank might), and improved mobility (aerial vehicle, exo-suits that improve mobility, etc) to give yourself good odds against something like that.
>>37433055
>The only way to deal with that thing is to fuck something.
/fit/ is screwed
>>37429062
This thread is gay. Sage.
>>37433055
Would pic related be relevant?
>>37430260
>lightyears ahead of ours in terms of advancement
>Using lightyears as a measurement for time
>>37429062
>The Thing
how do you fight a fucking virus? The thing killed people by either mimicking those around you and surprise attacking or changing all your cells until you're a thing
>>37433339
You fight it with fire, anon. You fight it with fire.
>mfw lighter and aerosol can
>mfw things are triggered to expose themselves at the prospect of imminent pain
>mfw i donkey kick the fuck out of anyone I suspect being one with my massive legs produced by hours of sumo squats and whole milk
>mfw they only absorb a portion of my boots or pants before running away screeching in pain cause I lit em up
>mfw your face at my face
>>37433443
that's the canon way. OP wants to know how you physically train to fight a thing
>>37433287
I'm a stupid mussleman
I cant into science stuff
>>37433504
...huh
Well ya got me there
Also I forgot to mention
>>37433179
You're on /fit/
Everything is gay here
>>37429062
speaking of aliens, could you train to hand-to-hand w/ Samus?
>>37429062
uphill sprinting/sprinting with weight
running stairs
push ups
pull ups/chinups
sit ups
dips
military press
upright row
curls
sand bag shouldering
kick boxing
>>37429062
Well, train like a soldier. Be able to carry around 50+ pounds of gear pretty much indefinitely. So lots of running, bodyweight exercises, and so on. "Otter mode" is the term you are looking for.
>>37429062
Buy a gun then follow this routine
1x Target practice weekly
>>37434061
>bodyweight exercises to train against shit that could tear your limbs off
>not lifting heavy twice a week to take atleast one blow unphased to keep shooting
>getting btfo by horror movie monsters
Yall niggaz itt need to watch Army of Darkness sheeeeiiit all you need is a chainsaw for a hand and an endless bag of one liners
>>37433504
You can't train to physically fight a thing. Any physical contact and you're fucked.
Although maybe from a range.
Throw plates and kettlebells x F
>>37430462
>Oh, and jedi training.
>>37430492
>And adamantium bones and a healing factor
And vibranium suit + vibranium shield.
>>37429346
You're saying I have to become Hemingway?
>>37433220
Pretty sure those guys especially 117 could take on any of the monsters talked about ITT
>>37430899
>katana
>best sword
sabres were the best swords you fucking weeb
>>37435223
>implying calisthenics won't make you flexible and agile enough to run along obstacles as you are being chased by monsters 5x stronger than a champion powerlifter
Me and my roomie went over the "It Follows" monster though and thru and to be honest, there's just no way to get rid of it completely. The best case scenario we came up with was to go live at sea but even then there are risks.
>>37438518
Wouldn't a vibranium suit shatter all your bones on impact, though?
Don't fuck with a demon/demonic entities.
They are bigger, and stronger, and faster. Remember, they were once Angels.
You have to first enhance your spirituality. Attend traditional Catholic masses regularly and get lots of St. Benedict medals/Holy water.
I wear a St. Michael scapular with a St. Benedict medal, I also keep a thing of Holy Salt and a thing of Holy Water in my truck.
Purchase a book called "Spritual Warfare". It is a small book with a picture of St. Michael on it.
Inside will contain prayers used to bind evil spirits and to cast away Demonic influence.
Also guns. Intermediate caliber, I prefer a .308.
There are hunters out there. They exist, but they are usually off the grid. They don't like outsiders so I don't recommend meddling with them.
I think you're foolish for underestimating ghosts and demons. Anything that can use someone you don't want to hurt as a tool is a bigger danger than anything you can shoot. That's how you train to kill anything that can be physically battled, by the way: you learn to shoot.
>>37429897
/omg/'s still good. Threads where people practice are good threads.
