>>37420443
Go over to the biggest guy in the free weight section and ask him if he'll mentor you like yoda. If you're lucky he will have a fetish for skinny or fat faggots. If not then go on the resistance machines out of plain sight and pretend.

First off, no one is going to give a shit about how little weight you're pushing around. If they do, they're thinking, "Good for him for trying."

Have your routine ready for when you get there.

Do some light warm ups. When you're ready to hit the real weights, go 10 pound lighter than you think you can do, because you can't curl 30 pound dbs for 3x8 or even 5x5.

>>37420443
nobody gives a shit. they're gonna be able to tell that you're new and they wont give a shit because they've all been there. no need to be nervous.

just look up some form videos before you go.

>>37420497
>>37420566
This and this, make sure you know what you're gonna do and how to do it correctly. FOR YOURSELF not for how you look to others

>>37420443
Pick up the heaviest dumbell ou can lift and curl it until you got a pair of killer pythons

Everything else really falls into place by itself. Remember that almost everyone on this board either doesn't lift or injects synthol into their body. If I were you I'd go to a better website like BB.com for advice

Good luck bro

Bring a towel to wipe down equipment after you're done. Put your weights away where you got them. Don't start random conversations with people for no reason or say "Hi I'm new". No on cares. Don't start doing push ups or jumping jacks in the squat rack. Go light on all your lifts. Getting stuck under a weight and having to call for help is a hell of a lot more embarrassing than having little or no weight on the bar.

>>37420443
You can't. Just go.

Don't listen to these cucks. You need to find the biggest guy in the gym, then find the hottest girl in the gym, then rape the hottest girl in the gym in front of the biggest guy in the gym.

This will assert your dominance and the resident alpha will be replaced by you.

Also piss on people's locker doors to let them know this gym belongs to you. Piss on the receptionists back too, don't worry they're used to it.

Make sure you wear cargo shorts with a belt and a shirt with a geeky picture. Talk politics with anyone resting between sets. You should have a shaker bottle with 4 scoops in it. Wear a hat that isn't your local sports team. Wear gloves on all the machines. When using a machine, make sure to walk away from it after each set and rest for 4-6 minutes whilst you surf /fit/ on your phone. When someone else walks away from the bench to rest, assert your dominance as take the bench to use as a stand for your dumbbells. Stare at all the chicks and comment on their form.

>>37420633
Lol
Bb.com is cancer-tier
Fuck off with your shilling

>>37420808
wrong thread?