My brother (he's 21 I'm 23) is a skinny fat with a terrible typical American diet. I started getting fit around January this year and have been loving the mental and physical gains so far. We've talked about him starting lifting but he always makes excuses even though I know he can find the time. We are blessed with great genetics (FACE HEIGHT and FRAME) but he's wasting them. Any tips on helping him get into the right state of mind to lift? He's jealous of my gains so I think that's a good start. Thanks bros
>>37412476
Play some sports with him and let him realize on his own how weak he is.
>>37412476
Why are you so worried about changing someone that clearly doesn't wanna change? You've been lifting for 5 months, you're not making a single soul "jealous" of anything. You might wanna readjust your perspective before you start trying to work on someone else's.
>>37412533
Should I start a fight with him?
>>37412559
Yes, obviously the squat increases you've put on in 5 months will be decisive in winning this fight. Afterwards he will obviously have no choice but to work out with you, and he definitely won't drop the bar on your head when you do a 1rm bench.
>>37412552
I've been lifting seriously for five months, I had a huge head start before that because of various sports I am involved in. The fat loss I have had this year has given me a physique that anyone besides the autistic monk mode fittards on this board would be proud of.
Fuck off mate.
>>37412577
You're not being very helpful either you goddamn retard.
>>37412595
If you really think you can fight your brother into working out seriously you have problems. Just fucking do outdoorsy stuff with him. Like take him on a hike, or play some basketball, or go for a bike ride, or what the fuck ever. Challenge him to a push-up contest, or pull-ups, or even sit-ups. How dumb do you have to be to immediately default to "let's physically attack my brother, that'll make him want to work out"?
>>37412586
>>37412595
I'm going to ask you again:
Why are you so worried about changing someone that clearly doesn't wanna change?
>>37412649
I was making a meme you idiot I'm not gonna fight him. Good advice though
>>37412652
In life there have been times where someone older than myself or more experienced has given me advice and I ignored them only to find out later that they were right. We all know how beneficial lifting is and most of us found out later than we wished. I care about him and his health and I want him to better himself instead of settling. He admits to me he wants to be fit but makes excuses. I would love to be able to motivate him to get started. Don't you guys have a younger bro that you want to see make themselves better?
He's your brother. Blackmail is always an option.
>>37412652
>Why are you so worried about changing someone that clearly doesn't wanna change?
Not like OP is putting a gun to his brother's face. I don't see the issue with pushing someone to be physically active and get into shape. But if his bro just doesn't want to do it, then whatever.
>>37412717
He's not gay though
A little background I've started introducing him to foods that taste good and are healthy he seems to be enjoying that but it's just too easy to default to fast food when you're hungry.
>>37412745
Just tell him to eat his protons if nothing else. It's good to eat healthy but if your regimen says to only eat clean, it's easy to screw up, eat like shit once, and fall off the bandwagon altogether. So give him some options.
>>37412709
>He admits to me he wants to be fit but makes excuses.
I'm not trying to be a dick here but... re-read the line above. If someone really, TRULY wants something, they'll work for it. That just doesn't seem to be the case with him. I'd say it's a lost cause if 5 (or more, apparently) months of persuasion and "jealousy" hasn't motivated him to do a single thing.
>>37412840
I understand your concern but I didn't ask you guys to convince me not to help him. I want to help him he's my brother. I want to know if anyone has gone through similar situations and what they did to motivate the person
My obese brother did everything in his power to sabotage my weightloss efforts. I still have trouble not resenting him. As kids we were always both eating whatever we want, by comparison i was always fatter. He certainly carried the weight better. I eventually picked up running and dieting right and he would tell me daily about how i couldnt lose weight. That i was genetically this fat, that I took after our father and would always be overweight.
I should mention that this is following a stay in a mental hospital for me following a suicide attempt, I was going through a very tough time and finding fitness really helped turn things around for me.
Eventually the weight started coming off quickly, i went from 250 to 180. It was at this point my brother stopped calling me fat ass, all the insults he was using werent working. He began printing out bizzare articles on the dangers of exercise and telling me instead that i was ruining my body.
Our relationship is pretty much nonexistant, we talk sometimes about casual things like movies or video games, but its very difficult to know he was actively working against me and wanted me to fail. To be depressed , suicidal and obese.
His weight has increased dramatically since this all happened over the course of about 3 years now. He occassionally mentions starting an exercise routine and ill give generic encouragement.
Anyways my situation is probably unique, i envy anyone that has a sibling they can work and support eachother on fitness goals. Sometimes the people closest to you can be the worst influences. I hope you can keep encouraging your brother to be healthy OP.
>>37413026
Thank you for sharing, sorry about your bro. It sounds like you are doing great though and you should be proud of that.
I'm happy may my bro isn't obese by any measure, he's starting to come around to the idea of healthy living too I just want to support and push him in the right direction
>>37413026
Your brother sounds like a dick.
Can't improve himself so he tries to drag others down to his level.
Fuck that shit dude, if he wants to lose weight he'll do it on his own, there's almost no other way.
>>37412855
You can't motivate someone that doesn't have the will to get up and exercise without any outside influence telling them too. Once you stop helping he is highly likely to fall backwards.
Tell him straight out that he's ruining his life and only he has the ability to fix it.
>>37413257
Typical crab bucket mentality
I'm sorry for being an asshole.
Motivation must start from within.
>>37413257
>>37413529
this
I dragged my youngest sibling into lifting
Now he wants to lift and he does
But he has no real motivation or drive. He's been the same size and strength for the past 2 years of the 3 he's been lifting
He doesn't take advice seriously. he just stays at the beginner level and then wonders why he plateaus
I can't make him fix his shit diet. He keeps telling me he eats enough. I can't make him do better reps. He thinks he's pushed enough.
My situation isn't the same as yours. But if he isn't motivated himself, you can't force him to.
The best thing you can do is make him jealous and envious or embarrassed.
When I quit lifting in HS until I picked it up again, my older brother, who I taught to lift too, passed me in strength, size, and was also lean too. I was envious and I kicked my ass in gear and stayed there since.
I know the feeling, seeing your sibling brother, who has better genetics than you, wasting his potential. But they have to come to that conclusion.
Keep going yourself, drop him, don't let him slow you down. Maybe one day he'll rethink it.
The truth is, there's not much you can do. I came back from college looking different. I was aushwitz before and came back dyel, gaining 70 pounds. Having a good face and height at 6'4, my brother saw girls hit on me and it made him mad because that doesn't happen to him. He's a sophomore in high school. I wanted to help him because he became the definition of skinny fat to the point of having no chin and the little dog frog neck. He only lays in bed and watches Netflix on his phone. After continuous nagging I finally got him to workout with me a couple times before going back to college. As soon as I left he stopped. I just got on summer break and have managed to have him come one time but he never would go back because he was sore. Honestly there's nothing you can do. They're the ones that have to want it. You can't live through your brother as much as you don't want him to make the same mistakes you did.
