Why do you femanons even bother? While you're busting your ass RUNNING on the TREADMILL, STACEY is eating BAGEL BITES and having guys drool over her TITS, FACE, and LEGS.
>>37317024
>bagel bites
So close.
You have to replace neckbeard food with normalfag food if you want this to work.
>Starbucks
>Cheesecake
>Anything but tendies
You can do it.
I have faith in you.
>>37317076
CHAD eats PIZZA
BRAD eats CALZONES
We're running out of pizza derivatives.
>>37317307
BRET eats FOCACCIA while you go GLUTEN free and low GI. Bret unloads baby BATTER in her hot BRICK OVEN while you prepare a SLOW cooker chicken meal for ONE.
>>37317024
I think you need to make it FACE, ASS, and TIS to get that effect.
>>37317474
Team small-medium perky tits 5ever
CHAD eats PIZZA and bangs STACEY while you spill SPAGHETTI at the GYM
>>37317024
DAILY REMINDER
You eat PIZZA, while Stacy works out
Boys look you and think "eww she's not even trying" with Stacy they think "I love her, she cares about her looks and stays in shape"
Stacy STILL feels INFINITELY better than you because she's FUN, CAREFREE, and PASSIONATE
Men are getting more and more choice and access to sex and it's either STACY or her HOT FRIEND
Why haven't you learned yet?
It's either ALL THE ATTENTION or NOTHING
don't forget STACY literally has HAIRLESS VAGINA genetics and drinks PUMPKIN SPICE LATTES while you DIET and do CARDIO
>>37317024
I see Miranda Kerr as more of a Gretchen Wieners to a hypothetical Stacey's Regina George.
>>37317024
But that's MIRANDA
>>37320881
Kek
Daily Reminder
Stacy only lasts till 26
>>37320863
thats a basic bitch not stacy
you think stacy would be near moms or little kids
stacy is backstage with the performers nigga
>>37317408
holy shit I am crying and dying
>>37322124
>26
More like 16
>>37317408
Fucking kek m8
LISTEN up WOMEN.
You sleep around and get MOMENTARY satisfaction while EMILY is building a future with her HUSBAND. You flirt hopelessly while EMILY discusses VALUES and FAMILY with her future HUSBAND. Do you know why Emily is able to lock down a guy worth marrying while you're selling your stinky SALMON-hole and future for a chance with CHAD? It's because of three things.
>She's TRADITIONAL in her values and femininity
So she gets a healthy relationship with a TRADITIONAL guy that you claim to want.
>She's MONOGAMOUS
so she never thinks about cheating and hasn't slept around (The guy of your dreams doesn't want a girl that's been a slut)
>She's QT
She dresses QT, she acts QT, and she looks QT. Guys like femenine cuteness. It inspires love and discipline in even the wildest men-more than offering sex will. CHAD gets sex from STACEY, but he won't stay around because she isn't special. He gets his SALMON from many women. EMILY gets to keep a HUSBAND because she will be a good MOTHER and the potential HUSBAND sees this.
These three values set you apart from other women these days. While Stacey is trying to get fulfillment from a career or using consumerism and sex as coping mechanisms for her barren SALMON-hole EMILY is raising beautiful CHILDREN and loves her HUSBAND-which is fulfilling to her.
>>37317408
>>37317408
SLOWCLAPTEARINEYESAMERICANFLAGINTHEBACKGROUND.JPG
>>37317408
TOP KEK
>>37320881
Yummm
>>37322124
STACY lives a more FULFILLING LIFE than your 100 YEARS of pure ENVIOUS MISERY
>>37317408
i don't understand half of those words yet i'm still laughing
YOU try to eat HEALTHY and pay for the GYM every month while STACY eats PIZZA and gets a 9 INCH CHAD DICK inside her every night
Why the fuck is she called Stacy. She's obviously Jolene.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGEubdH8m0s
>Your beauty is beyond compare
>With flaming locks of auburn hair
>With ivory skin and eyes of emerald green
>Your smile is like a breath of spring
>Your voice is soft like summer rain
>And I cannot compete with you, Jolene
its like you numbnuts have never listened to Dolly Parton.
>>37322124
23 you mean
TAD eats TORTINOS
>>37325949
Jolene is the southern belle/toddler beauty pageant contestant. Stacy is more applicable everywhere else.
>>37323485
yes, this is the one you should be using, OP
>>37323485
i r8 it 8/8 m8
>>37317408
ayyy no puedo
this thread is too much
While you SLAVE AWAY on the TREADMILL and eat KALE MIRANDA is eating LEGOLAS CUM and CHAD would rather JERK OFF INTO A PIZZA to her then even LOOK AT YOU
>>37317408
That rant was beautiful. Just beautiful.
>>37323543
I know Anon, pumpkin spice lattes are amazing.
>>37317024
>LEGS
It's supposed to be ASS you dimwit
>>37317408
>SLOW cooker
salsa chicken
>>37320863
horrible shoe choice for a festival
if they wanna be cute go booooooooooooots cowboy boots dat is
>>37326445
>JERK OFF INTO A PIZZA
Dammit. Dammit...
>>37325949
>trying to change a meme this old
Honestly, fucking newfags
>>37326583
Not him but the entire meme itself is a newfag meme newfag.
>>37326445
Actually MIRANDA guzzles JUSTIN'S HOT PROSTATE MILKSHAKES while you binge on VEGEMITE to have his ABORTION.
The memes are evolving right before our eyes. It's a miracle of nature.
>>37323562
her elbows are too pointy wouldnotbang/10
>>37323562
no tits, no ass
Those eyes though..
wouldstillbang/10
