http://www.vice.com/read/the-incredible-falsehood-of-the-muscle-man
>There are unexpected, ineffable consequences of pursuing a body that's more, um, eff-able than functional. "I hear the worst things from girls about those guys in bed—sex with a statue, basically," Aaron Copeland, 27, a trainer in Houston and cofounder of SwoleSquad Apparel, told VICE. "I've been that guy," admitted Sanders Omoshebi, 29, a trainer in Miami who has worked as Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's body double. "Sex for me was over in ten minutes," he recalled, "You're doing shitty cardio. Your hip muscles are too tight. You can't thrust. I felt sorry for the girls."
>These men are known colloquially as facade-bods. They are second-generation Schwarzeneggers, contemporary iterations of the chicken-legged meatheads of yesteryear. Despite the current talk about centeredness, health, fitness, self-respect, their main goal is, as one gym's slogan puts it, to #lookbetternaked.
>"I never live up to the expectations people have of my body," he told VICE. "I'm constantly disappointing people. It's more embarrassing than anything else. I'm not as fast as people expect. Not as strong. Not as anything. I'm basically average. Secretly average."
>>37203374
>vice
stopped reading there :^)
>>37203374
Another day, another excuse
>>37203374
>hurry during I'm a meat head who has nothing else in life other than lifting for upper body so everyone else who lifts is the same
>vice
>trash made to appeal to fat tumblrettes and beta cucks
They can bitch and moan all they want but given the chance to bang one of those 'meatheads' they'd bend over and spread their asshole in an instant
Not going to bother giving them the click.
Thats right now chug down that pepsi
>>37203374
>"haha you look great but you are bad at sex, my lazy personality and doughy body are excused!"
>>37203374
>lifting for aesthetics
yes, you do deserve to be laughed at by skinnyfat normies if you do this
yes, the guys they're talking about in the article are faggots, but it's presented as all guys that are ripped are like that.
>>37203374
people say the same thing about stereotypical really hot girls
they fuck like dead fish
>>37203374
Why is this making you guys mad? It should be fucking hilarous. It's a grown man writing an entire article in an attempt to smear shit on people who achieve what he can't achieve a fraction of. Take pride in the knowledge that we are among the top of the male population just by sticking to a lifting routine every week, and we are overwhelmingly superior to millions of crybabies like this guy.
>>37203374
Im in disbelief that this article suggests proficient rock climbers often cant do pullups, but it doesnt matter because pullups are a useless exercise...
Like WTF senpai? Every rock climbing gym Ive been in has someone training pullups off to the side at any given time - and if you cant do a pull up how are you going to be able to do a dyno? Or if you have to go without a foothold for a second youre SOL.
Not only that but it also assumes no meatheads ever train back or legs. Im constantly getting asked to lift things for people, whether its a keg or a big ass pot at work or moving a washer and dryer Im first on the list. Im 6ft1 192lbs 9% so very close to their example guy who says hes secretely as average and weak as any DYEL
>>37203561
>25 pushups like it's nothing
kek he must be real strong
>By contrast, John Baranik, 22, is a senior at the University of Pennsylvania who regularly runs a mile in under five minutes, works out with the Penn cycling team, does 25 pushups like it's nothing, and pops high-rep bench presses of his own weight (at 5'8", he's 150 pounds). He can do sit-ups "until the cows come home," he told VICE.
The only thing here of any note whatsoever is his mile time.
>>37203374
Is this article a troll?
>Having six-pack abs can make you as vulnerable to spine injury as having a gut
>>37203374
This is accurate for people who only train for aesthetics though.
A real athlete can haul his own ass around and touch his toes. I promise that professional rugby players can fuck the shit out of the girls they're talking about being disappointed in manchild bodybuilders.
>>37203644
Now I'm mad.
>>37203561
Same. It's kinda the reason I don't actually outright help people in the gym if I see them with bad form unless they ask me for help...just more competition in my eyes if they know what they are doing.
If people want to cry and act like having a aesthetic body is bad then let them, their whore gfs will still lust after it while they make weird lists on how my body is somehow "inferior."
>>37203644
>does 25 pushups like it's nothing
Holy shit we've got a demigod here
>>37203374
lol SO happy not to be a helpless liberal "victim"
There is NOTHING girls like more than you throwing them around and roughing them up. Try getting your average skinnyfat faggot to do that.
>>37203636
Like I said, it's a pathetic article to the point of being funny. And there are many, many obese and skinny faggots who will read it and justify their own failure of a body. This should be hilarous, not rage-inducing for superior specimens like us.
>>37203644
Man, that nigga is close to the world record
>the fact that many skilled rock climbers often can't do pull-ups
I am EXTREMELY sceptical of that.
>>37203447
>>37203688
This
but this article is a load of shit in itself
>fast-twitch muscles that don't pop when you build them
LMAO
Normies will stop at nothing to try and not lift
>>37203374
>does 25 pushups like it's nothing
lol I just checked with my 13 year old brother his whole bbbal team can do this
>>37203374
I love how they go the whole article trashing aesthetics, then at the end quote pic related, whose body is everything the article is against
>>37203774
>this is what an unskilled rock climber looks like
https://youtu.be/igYhX5xyprw
>>37203722
Same here
No one ever helped me when I first started out and I will do the same
Life's tough, buddy
>>37203636
Wat
>>37203374
Bodybuilders BTFO T B H
>>37203827
God in Heaven. That's beyond incredible.
>>37203443
Underrated post right here
>having muscle makes you less functional
>>37203722
i don't think of it as competition, i just think that if someone can't even be bothered to put the effort into learning what good form is i've got no reason to waste my time teaching them how to do it
>>37203773
The gap between a 5 minute mile and a 4 minute mile is almost as big as the gap between 5'11" and 6'
>>37203561
I mean i'm a manlet who has been doing strictly BW stuff but at least i'm fucking sticking to it and trying. This fucking guy in the article is ridiculous, how can anyone live with that lack of motivation?
>>37203374
>These were military guys. And I'd be forcing fruit snacks down their throats to get them through it.
>They just had no idea how their bodies worked outside of a gym." Their giveaways, he said, are their protein bars and shakes, their endless peacocking about "chest days" and "leg days,"
>and their disbelief at the fact that many skilled rock climbers often can't do pull-ups, a gym favorite that has surprisingly little real-world application.
>>37203374
The salt is strong with this article
>>37204135
>Their giveaways, he said, are their protein bars and shakes, their endless peacocking about "chest days" and "leg days,"
>you will never get salty enough about fitness that you make up complete bullshit to put in some whiny article.
>>37204027
If you don't do mobility work and cardio it will do exactly that. Muscle is heavy and sucks up oxygen and energy when you use it for anything, so man who's got a ton of muscle is going to have a hard time getting to the same level of cardio performance as a skellington, have a harder time doing pullups or climbing, and will have to work much harder to be as flexible.
Look at actual pro athletes for once. They don't look like Ronnie Coleman for a reason.
I love betas and nu-males. Their crab in the bucket mentality ensures my victories.
>>37203374
Not sure if crabs in a bucket or sour grapes.
Anyhow, keep lifting, boys.
>>37203644
>150 bench
>impressive
>>37203627
>pullups are a useless exercise
earned yourself a (you)
>>37204343
>2025
>nu cucks are the norm
>fit privilege tax is instated
>it's acceptable to openly discriminate again fit people in jobs and such, especially if white and male
This is the future you chose
>>37204343
that statment itself reveals a crap in the bukit mental titlty
>>37203399
>>37203443
this
why is every DYEL trying to discredit lifters these days
>>37203374
Well maybe don't lift to the point that you look the fucking rock.
>some anecdotal evidence of some ripped dudes who were shit in bed
>all guys who work out are now shit in bed
It's ok to say it about us though, since we're evil muscle men.
>>37203644
> tfw that's my height and weight
> tfw even I have no delusions that benching bodyweight at 150 is unimpressive
Did this guy just say that rock climbers can't do pullups? That might be the dumbest fucking thing I've read in weeks.
Also on functional strength. I can pick washers and dryers up and throw them in trucks by myself. And I'm very weak compared to people who lift here. If something needs to be moved I can move it. If something needs to be lifted I can lift it. That's generally a pretty fucking handy skill to have.
Not to mention simply being able to lift things doesn't limit other skills like a job or intelligence. Being strong is literally only an upside that a lot of people don't have.
But if people want to be pussies than that just makes me better by proxy so no sweat off my back
>>37204293
As long as you stay natty, lean and do cardio your performance will be far better than the average joe.
>many skilled rock climbers can't do pullups
KEK
If you're not doing chinups and pullups as a climber, I hope you're not planning on competing.
>>37203374
I can easily lift a girl up and impale her on my cock. It's very arousing for women to be manhandled.
>>37203374
>rock climbers often can't do pull-ups
they can but I'm sure Vice would just find some reason to say that pull-ups actually mean you're weak and bad at sex
>>37203374
>fat weak "men" are better at sex than fit ones
>contemporary iterations of the chicken-legged meatheads of yesteryear
inflammatory comments to increase traffic: check
>I'll cut my wrists and flop on the floor as long as you put it in the paper!
These fucking faggots disgust me, I don't know why you'd self-deprecate like that.
>does 25 pushups like its nothing
>Like its nothing
Maybe because pretty much anybody with any upper body strength can do that
>>37203379
this
>>37203827
>two finger front lever
> and then
>two pinky front lever
holy shit
http://www.hercampus.com/school/wash-u/campus-celebrity-marcus-jecklin
Vice used to be good too.
How does someone only last 10 minutes? I literally have had 6 hour sex sessions before. Came twice.
Nigga needs to understand he's got more than a dick he can use.
>>37205373
and that he can still fuck after he happens to cum too fast
>>37204459
Reading comprehension goes quite a ways m8.
Should've done squats and deadlift
>dem glutes for thrusting power
>>37205373
>6 hour sex sessions
lol, why would you do that?
>>37205373
K dude
>>37203374
>"I never live up to the expectations people have of my body," he told VICE. "I'm constantly disappointing people. It's more embarrassing than anything else. I'm not as fast as people expect. Not as strong. Not as anything. I'm basically average. Secretly average."
Should have done SS+GOMAD,faggot.
>>37205373
> lying in a Cambodian silk trade board
>>37205373
this.
I've had fucking 8 hour sex sessions, came 16 times
>"Having six-pack abs can make you as vulnerable to spine injury as having a gut,"
> "I keep it real. I don't talk about aesthetics. I talk about emotional benefits," he told VICE. "That way you never get frustrated because you're leaving every exercise feeling good. And, honestly, the six-pack will come quicker and stronger if you feel good. It's a tougher road when you're focused on looks. Feeling good is wealth. Looking good is new money. It gets real stupid real quick."
But I thought having six-pack abs was bad for you?
>implying girls don't want the seed of a god
>>37205635
Rich pls go
>>37203374
>people who don't lift for sports performance suck at sports performance
Gee, who would have guessed
>>37205697
I think the whole point is that looking athletic actually being athletic is silly.
The article is just so loaded with idiocy that nobody cares about it.
>>37205697
Proper strength training and cardio makes you better at everything though, even sports.
>>37204601
because they grow dumpy and fat in their blogger chairs while lifters lift and, at times, get girls.
It's just nerd jealousy. Like if you're somehow good at sports and athletic you're doomed to bag the groceries of some twiggy neuro-physicist nerd.
>"I keep it real. I don't talk about aesthetics. I talk about emotional benefits," he told VICE. "That way you never get frustrated because you're leaving every exercise feeling good. And, honestly, the six-pack will come quicker and stronger if you feel good.
>>37203825
whats wrong with your pic?
dude is supper shredded and jacked
>>37206804
Learn to fucking read.
>>37203374
>25 push ups like its nothing
>>37203802
Lmao its so fucking true.
Top kek. Well meme'd my friend.
>>37203374
we have to remember that vice caters to the average overweight bernie sanders SJW
all they want to hear is that its ok theyre fat
this is just SJW propagandA
>>37203374
>checked the comments section
There is still hope left in this world.
>>37203374
>vice
>>37207104
yup
>>37203374
>good rock climbers
>cant pull up
HAHAHAHAJAJHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAJAJAJAJAJAJAJHAHAHAHAHHAJAJAJAHAHGAGAFAGAHSHAGSHAVSVW.
KILL THEM ALL BURN THEM ALL
>>37203374
>Not realizing Vice puts out this bs to stir controversy on purpose
>does 25 pushups like its nothing
kek.
>>37203644
> tfw I bench 150 and feel embarrassed if people see me
> John Baranik is so chuffed about it he writes it up in an internet article read by thousands
>>37203443
this
the poor shit on the rich, the oppressed shit on the free, the weak shit on the strong. people don't like people who have shit they want.
>>37204459
hes quoting the article
>>37203743
>demigod
Laughed way too hard at this
Anyone going to pastebin this, I refuse to give Vice clicks ever since they basically turned into an edgy version of the Huffington Post.
>>37207447
shit bro I bench 159.5 and I'm pretty fuggin impressed considering how little I could do when I started.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
>>37203374
>reading vice
>>37205635
>Not having a 96 hour cocaine and preworkout fueled sex marathon and cuming 192 times
Not gonna make it
>>37205599
Sex is fun.
She told me I saved her marriage. I was her john redcorn.
>>37208445
Seriously, I don't know who to trust anymore. Are all news outlets lying cunts?
>>37208497
POO IN DESIGNATED MAIZE FIELD
>>37204565
Well not exactly, he's not actively holding them back. More like he's sitting outside the bucket and laughing at them.
Could try to help, but unfortunately the crabs like their bucket. Its a scary world outside of its reassuring confines.
>>37203827
What the fuck, this dude is spider man.
>>37204293
>muscles make you bulky
>muscles make you slower
>muscles make you inflexible
Rapid fire nonsense shitposted straight out of a 1950's girl's lockerroom.
>>37203374
>some guys who are shredded suck at sex
wew, who fucking knew. so many people suck at sex. it's not the body that makes them bad, it's the brain. plenty of people without shredded bodies suck in the sack too, maybe even more simply because they have absolutely no muscle to them.
then you turn around and look at most famous male porn stars. johnny sins is shredded and fucks like a maniac. fucking based rocco is a mad man while fucking. even skinny shredded faggots like james dean and danny d are beating pussies up like double dragon.
this article is stupid. just practice to be better at sex. you wanna know how you do that? fuck someone.
most important advice i can give to anyone about being good at sex? communicate with the person you're fucking. listen to not only their words but how their body responds to what you do. it can be fun just doing what you want but it's way more rewarding to come out of that whole ordeal with a satisfied chick. you're not going to do that going fucking machine gun on a girls vagina for 2 minutes till you pop.
>>37208416
Don't bother, this article has nothing to offer beyond, "Remember not to ignore your physical health while attaining a better appearance and self-esteem."
"I'm constantly disappointing people. It's more embarrassing than anything else. I'm not as fast as people expect. Not as strong. Not as anything. I'm basically average. Secretly average."
Even so, so what? Most people would, by definition, be average in bed. At least he gets to look good while doing it.
Besides, I find it hard to imagine that someone involved in regular fitness who is more involved in looking good than direct health benefits would be worse off than someone who didn't exercise at all, which seems to be the alternative for most.
>>37206032
#doublestandards #feminaziconspiracy
More excuses for disgusting normies to use to stay fat slobs. Its hilarious because as much as they say these things out loud. It's obvious what they really think deep down. The more people with this attitude the better we look in comparison. Fuck them all.
>>37209677
The most damning thing about the entire article is that it praises some dork for doing 25 pushups, riding a bicycle and benching 150. Are you really telling me this guy who was the Rock's body double can't do those things? He can't bench 150 and do 25 pushups?
I thought fit guys would be the epitome of normie
>>37204601
People seem to have it in their heads that life is like an rpg, and that by putting more points into STR, you necessarily have to put fewer into (in this case) CON.
See also; how people talk about 'stupid meatheads'
>>37203644
>25 pushups like it's nothing
Weightlifters BTFO BTFO.
Weight lifters on SUICIDE WATCH.
BODYWEIGHT FAGS MASTER RACE.
>>37203374
>excuses
Nothing new.
>>37203374
>sit-ups are "the worst exercise you can do because they're spine-crushing."
If that's the case why does every branch of the military use them for their physical fitness test?
>>37203374
>"If you want to look good, that's easy.
Maybe if you take steroids or consider 3 years of consistent lifting every day "easy".
>>37211736
Well, they're right. If you spend all your waking hours on A, you will naturally be worse at B.
Add to that that test is the hard cap for IQ and more test than estro means premature ejaculation.
>>37204293
>Look at actual pro athletes for once. They don't look like Ronnie Coleman for a reason.
Football players are fucking huge and jacked though.
>>37203379
this
>>37211888
Because the military has no idea about physical training. It's a running joke in history that military training declines extremely in peace times, gets super-great in war times (After all the people from the peace-.time PT groups died and people notice it doesn't work), and then becomes shit again after the war is won.
>>37205373
Sure thing buddy.
I lasted 12 hours with your mom, such a slut men
>He segued to CrossFit until a herniated disc forcibly segued him into gymnastics
pfffffhahahaha
>>37211888
>the military cares about my spine / joint health
Dude youll be long gone before this shit catches up to you, they couldnt give less of a fuck
>>37211945
>Football players are fucking huge and fat though.
Fixed
>>37203443
SJW's are basically crabs. If they didn't have someone else to hate, they'd turn on each other.
>>37212003
Projecting much?
>>37211888
Y'know this is actually kinda true if you try weighted situps. Your lumbar will fucking scream. Leg Raises are far superior.
>>37203467
The prettiest girl I ever fucked was the worst in bed. She seriously did just lie there.
But I've fucked some gorgeous women who were great lays, too.
>>37211980
Kek
>>37212023
Not really. I just find from past experience that people who have a social justice view of politics and life, tend to operate with a very hostile attitude, against anyone that doesn't conform to their worldview. Which goes against the liberal beliefs they preach.
>>37203374
People are kicking up quite the backlash to the revival of gym culture, aren't they?
>>37203644
>pops high-rep bench presses of his own weight (at 5'8", he's 150 pounds)
is this a joke? i could bench my own bw within a month of lifting and i weigh 165
>>37211888
Because the US military is a bloated mess of shady money and inefficient bureaucracy (and I say this as someone who generally likes bureaucracy). Things that seem basic, like measuring physical fitness, take a back seat to, say, overpriced and under-performing stealth fighters. Smaller forces like the brits and the canadians already base their fitness standards and programs around running, carrying, and running while carrying.
There's an odd synergy with the US and its NATO partners, if one of em wants to intervene in this or that country (like Mali) it'll throw all the heavy equipment and logistical assistance as it can manage, the US does that well enough, but troops are just beyond it these days. I mean, it works fine, but what would probably work better is just making the top brass hate/distrust grunts less, actually working on em to bring em up to par with the rest of its allies, rather than just brandishing its carrier fleet and air force at anyone who dares criticize such.
>Vice
wew lad didn't even read after that
>>37212082
I can believe that.
I knew a SJW with what she claimed was an anxiety disorder, and got all self-righteous about mental health.
Then a guy in our class had a panic attack of his own, where he got a little aggressive (basically trying to get people to leave him alone), and she ended up tearing him a new one and then treated him like a total pariah.
>>37203561
>Why is this making you guys mad
Because it's true. And truth hurts.
>>37203374
>do sports besides lifting
>problem fucking solved
Not really difficult to figure out.
>>37212157
You coulda just pointed that out
Look, if someone is being shitty but they're also into call-out culture, call em out, it puts them in the spot in a public place where they now are required to make a public confession.
>>37203374
>If you spend all your waking hours on A, you will naturally be worse at B.
f a l l a c y
The original context assumes that the person calling you a "stupid meathead" puts more hours into B than you, when in reality they're likely just a fat Vice blogger who puts no hours into A or B and puts all their waking hours into eating ice cream and being on their iphone
>>37212209
I wasn't there to see her confronting him. I heard about it through a friend. I saw the panic attack though, and it was pretty clear what was happening.
>>37204135
>>These were military guys. And I'd be forcing fruit snacks down their throats to get them through it.
>>They just had no idea how their bodies worked outside of a gym." Their giveaways, he said, are their protein bars and shakes, their endless peacocking about "chest days" and "leg days,"
>>and their disbelief at the fact that many skilled rock climbers often can't do pull-ups, a gym favorite that has surprisingly little real-world application.
This - as in the realization that athletically trained muscles are useless in real life - is nothing new:
>It had long been recognized that the training of an athlete was detrimental to the training required of the soldier. As early as Euripides' time, about 420, the difference between the athlete and the soldier was recognized: "What man has ever defended the city of his fathers by winning a crown for wrestling well or running fast or throwing a diskos or planting an uppercut on the jaw of an opponent? Do men drive the enemy out of their fatherland by waging war with diskoi in their hands or by throwing punches through the line of shields? No one is so silly as to do this when he is standing before the steel of the enemy" (Autolykos, frag. 282; A 230).
Source: Miller, "Ancient Greek Athletics"
In fact, it's pretty hilarious that our soldiers train like athletes, when it's obvious that athletic training is exactly the wrong way. The Greeks recognized this, but they couldn't stop the degeneration of their gymnastics into a pure athletic exercise.
because of this (according to themselves and the Romans and everyone else), they were beaten by Rome, who recognized the difference in exercise as well.
And Rome, in turn, was beaten later by Germans, who didn't even know athletic exercises,a s soon as they degenerated enough to mistake athletic exercise for warfare exercises.
In case you didn't understand all this: We are fucked.
>>37212082
Very true. My gfs fag friend deleted me on facebook the other day because I questioned some stupid socialist movement he supported.
>>37204865
>Did this guy just say that rock climbers can't do pullups? That might be the dumbest fucking thing I've read in weeks.
It's true though.
Many don't. Even gymnasts usually don't do more than 10-15 in one set (source: Science of Gymnastics by fuck me, I don't remember the name).
Reason? Not functional.
Just as an anecdote: I knew a rock climber who was awesome at pullup,s did like 60 in one set and could do one-armed pullups on his little finger.
He was absolute shit at climbing and never amounted to much.
>>37212223
Damn shame, that. Folks tend to simmer down after their first call out, cuz they finally get an idea what it's like to be on the receiving end.
I mean, having ideas of what oppression or social inequality is fine and dandy, student activist call-out culture ain't. That shit turns out to be real bad when folks get into the job market.
>>37203374
ok so obviously, the author wrote this article to get over his bad body, mixed with stereotypes of gym goers and blatant false information.
He does have a point however: the one buff dude saying he always felt embarassed when people realized how clumsy he is with his body, bad at sports and probably pretty shitty cardio too.
How do you deal with this? Because ive noticed this effect too, girls being objected by a buff guy because he completely embarassed himself at a physical activity, alltewhile i sprint past him smiling with my ottermode built. Once i stopped though, man he plowed me over fuck me.
You cant expect normies to understand muscles =/= athleticism (flexibility, speed, coordination, reflexes) so how do you deal with this?
Or is your /fit body dominating others at sports because your peers suck? In my circle of friends everybody does some sort of sport so just being fit would help you fuckall
>>37211928
Yes, but the reality is that most people don't spend every waking hour doing one thing.
Many people watch TV in their downtime, I go to the gym in my downtime.
>>37203374
>chicken-legged meatheads of yesteryear
Lol have they seen Tom Platz? Or any professional bodybuilder for that matter?
>>37211928
Yes, but the reality is that most people don't spend every waking hour doing one thing.
Many people watch TV in their downtime, I go to the gym in my downtime.
>>37212270
>ok so obviously, the author wrote this article to get over his bad body, mixed with stereotypes of gym goers and blatant false information.
As did all writers in history WHO LITERALLY WROTE THE SAME THINGS FROM ANTIQUITY ON.
You guys are so fucking retarded.
>>37212227
It wasn't "degeneration", greek athletes were a minor segment of the population and tended to have different training and diet regimens than their fellow citizens, and there was no illusion of any martial prowess surrounding olympic winners, they weren't made into strategos or anything like that, just given infinite boipussy.
There's a certain amount of cultural continuity in the greco-roman world, attesting to the great cultural influence of the hellenes before the rise of the italics. Roman activity before it became violent games mostly done by slaves was greek activity, wrestling and running and all that.
As for why the romans lost to the various germanic tribes, it's a mistake to attribute it to someone physical lack in roman troops, cmon man u 4 real
>>37203374
Nice excuse
>>37212332
>American education - the post
Let's see:
>It wasn't "degeneration"
>there was no illusion of any martial prowess surrounding olympic winners
>they weren't made into strategos
>Roman activity before it became violent games mostly done by slaves was greek activity
>As for why the romans lost to the various germanic tribes, it's a mistake to attribute it to someone physical lack in roman troops
Please don't tell me you're at college or uni level. Literally all of that is wrong. What the fuck. Leave it to Americans to destroy my faith in humanity every single day.
>>37204066
I just recently started training with a friend. His form is horrendous after lifting for a year. He uses body momentum on every single lift, lifts huge amounts with horrible form, doesn't keep track of any of his lifts and doesn't follow any program, actually it's not even a program, he just randomly does sets based on how he feels. No matter how much I point this out or show him correct form he fails to listen. After 3 months I've made decent gains, while he hasn't made any.
People will make the effort when they want to, thinking back to when I started I probably behaved similarly.
Honestly though, he's one of the first people I've lifted regularly with besides my ex. Are they all like this?
>>37207468
>He thinks people want to be bad at sex
wat
>>37209302
It's all true, deal with it. This shit has literally been known since pre-Christian times.
>>37203374
>secretly average
>tfw this article wants to make fatties believe that they are healthier or have more endurance than a guy who trains
i mean come the fuck on.
girls turn into the niagara falls when you pick them up to fuck them against a wall or are able to throw them around in bed.
>>37203374
>Your hip muscles are too tight
>doing squats properly
pick one
Vice writing staff confirmed for dyels
>>37212323
Chicken legs = big thighs, small calves, ie. squat legs
Ever seen a chicken leg before, you retard?
>>37212270
>You cant expect normies to understand muscles =/= athleticism (flexibility, speed, coordination, reflexes)
You can't even get /fit/ to understand this.
/fit/ LITERALLY thinks that all you need for athletic excellence is a big squat. Don't even try to deny it.
>>37204035
Shit wrong poster>>37212394
>>37212415
That's not what 'chicken legs' means you retard.
>>37204865
>Did this guy just say that rock climbers can't do pullups? That might be the dumbest fucking thing I've read in weeks.
It's true. Most rock climbers do body rows because you nusually pull horizontally in climbing. Also, you use mostly leg drive.
Strict vertical pulling like in pull ups isn't used in climbing. Surprised me too, but that's how it is.
>Not to mention simply being able to lift things doesn't limit other skills like a job or intelligence.
Except it does. In the case of intelligence, literally. Because IQ is capped by test levels - high test, low IQ. High IQ, low test.
>>37212433
It's exactly what "chicken legs" means. Squat legs. Everyone on here has them. Meaty thigh, bony calves.
>>37203374
well it's a stupid article obviously. as if somebody will stop training after reading this. but in regards to bodybuilding it really isn't very functional. and for the sake of argument let's say being functional is being mobile. most bodybuilders severely lack mobility. some stretch and work on it but most just roid and do curls which isn't really impressive because you really do become a statue.
>>37212434
I think you might wish it was this way, in a comforting sort of way, but while hormonal imbalances are not correlated with anything good, your test level has nothing to do with your intelligence. Plenty of people with testosterone insensitivity who are born male and end up phenotypically female that are perfectly normal and it isn't discovered until after puberty.
Plenty of people with downs syndrome and perfect testosterone.
>>37212449
>>37212415
chicken legs literally just means skinny legs
>>37212434
please kill yourself for your comments on rock climbing
you clearly know fuck all and need to die
>>37212415
what an absolute retard the chicken legs meme does not include the calves mate everybody who calls other people chicken legs talk about their thighs not their calves
>>37212423
>projecting
nobody even talks about athleticism here they just talk about aesthetics and how strong you can get why do you think nobody gives a shit about cardio here and the only people who do are the athletes.
>>37208497
did she at least give you a blow jon
>>37212533
>the chicken legs meme does not include the calves
Calflet detected
>>37212434
>People stronger than me are dumb, the post
Kek
>>37212227
>He read the source material but didn't understand it
Vice has turned into shit after McInnes left. Just opinionated, biased shit now
What do you guys expect from neckbeard hipsters...
>>37212181
Or, y'know, just don't lift purely for aesthetics. Throw in some of dat dere dreaded cardio.
>>37203644
>5'8 150
> 25 push ups like nothing
> sit ups till the cows come home
I'm actually on the train giggling at this shit like a little girl looking like an autist.>>37203636
>>37203374
Lazy cunts' attempts at stopping me are worthless. I'll keep pursuing the looks of a Greek God while they mantain their looks of a garbage container.
>>37212408
Dyel was confirmed at vice
>>37212434
>high test, low IQ. High IQ, low test.
Anyone who doesn't do their cardio is going to be bad at sex. That goes double for people who don't work out at all. At least guys who lift can generate hip drive and have forceful strokes.
>>37203644
I don't even know that the mile time is impressive considering he's 150lbs.
>>37212498
http://www.climbstrong.com/articles/20130113_3
>Pull ups are a waste of time
>There's nothing like a title almost everyone disagrees with. It's a sure-fire way to make sure people at least look at the article. So, now that you're looking, I'll be more clear. If you're interested in actually improving your climbing ability, you'd be wasting your time if pull-ups were a major part of your training. It's not that the movement is inherently bad, it's just not specific enough to what we do on the rock to justify spending valuable training time developing it.
>>37212533
Sup chicken leg, how are all those squats working out for you?
>>37213200
>Literally admitting to using shitty clickbait without the faintest hint of shame.
How fucking low can people get?
>>37213200
just kill yourself
god retards like you make me fucking mad
>>37212148
don't forget to ask bobby buttfucker from the louisiania bayou to stop fucking butts long enough to give democracy back to the iraqi natives he fucked in the butt
>>37203379
I was gave a short interview to a Vice journo once, to incorporate in a bigger article.
She then wrote some extremely biased shit.
Never again.
>Caring about the woman's pleasure.
A good woman rides your dick, not the other way.
Now get out with your play-doh pecs.
The worthless muscle thing applies to a large extend of people though. I see so many overly bulk guys exclusively doing low rep heavy weight exercises. These kind of bloated meatheads are usually out of breath when they are doing heavy labour work at a average-high pace, i speak out of experience. Reminded me when i started doing pre-pull up exercises at the pull-up bar (because i could only do 1 or less at the time), some fat bulk guy that obliviously never did cardio came up to me and "adviced" me to take a machine with weights instead, because pull-ups were "way to hard". I declined his offer and kept doing my pseudo pull up exercises. Glad i did because im at 5 pull-ups now and going up.
Also, as still being a average body dude i can promise you that all these apologist fucks would date a atheletic person over a skinnyfat one in a second.
>>37203644
>5'8''
>does 25 pushups like it's nothing
When? When will they learn?
>>37212244
It said they "can't". Not "some of them don't specifically train pullups". Learn to read.
Anyone who isn't a fat fuck that rocks climbs once a month and tells people they're a rock climber can do pullups.
>>37203374
>lol meatheads amirite?
>STFU you fuckin DYEL how Dare you not worship us lifters
Who cares? Why do you guys care what anyone says or thinks about you? This jock vs nerd mentality was cringworthy in highschool, why are you all perpetuating it?
>>37213200
>>37212434
>>37212244
You've gotta be the same retard. "Can't" ≠"don't train". Good luck being a climber and unable to do a pullup. You must be some sedentary fuck if you think you can have any kind of "climbing ability" and no lats. How do you think they climb up if they're only pulling horizontally?
>>37213646
Oh wow you must be a real expert on this matter, 5 pull ups already.
Fucking DYELs.
>>37214053
I can't believe someone is defending Vice on this. The entire sport of pulling yourself upwards consists of people who don't or can't do pullups.
It's in the name for fuck's sake
>>37214961
I think this has happened because of people who've never climbed knowing someone who's done it twice and thinking that makes them a climber. You wouldn't run a 15 minute mile and call yourself a runner. You wouldn't learn squat form and call yourself a powerlifter. You wouldn't download a car. If you can't do a pull-up you're not a climber.
That article: "The advice always goes the same way: assess what's really holding you back, and get after it. 999 times out of a thousand, pull-ups won't be on the list."
They're assuming you can already do them though. If you can't, it's sure as shit holding you back.
>>37203374
Not as worthless as your genitals loma.
>>37203374
Jesus Christ.
I could do 25 press ups when I was four fucking stone
>>37203447
>Muh functional strenght
The only real purpuose of lifting is looking and feeling good
Kill yourself
>>37215088
Speak for yourself nu male. Just helped the pops redo his roof, fucking beasting those shingle bundles up the ladder.
>>37214856
Never claimed i was... You really think i would claim to be one after calling myself average and still working my way up? gtfo moron. Having big muscles is one thing, but if you can't even do some simple labour work without getting out of breath like an actual fucking fatass, then you might aswell just be a fucking fatass.
>>37215088
guess how I know you were always picked last for sports at school.
>>37215064
>stone
>You're doing shitty cardio. Your hip muscles are too tight. You can't thrust.
>not doing cardio
>not doin stretches
>low how come you cant trust what the fuck is wrong with you
I was a spoopy skeleton and i'm a lot better in bed now than i used to.
So I guess fat guys are good in bed?
Given there superior carido and over all sex appeal.
Been wasting my time senpai
itt: people who have never been truly jacked
If you have been anywhere near 1000lbs club you know how fkn atrocious your body is in anything other than picking up heavy things. Try joining a game of soccer and you'll notice how horribly out of shape you are.
Athletic is the new jacked, deal with it.
>>37217068
>never does anything but lifting, no sports, no cardio, no stretching
>"wow, my body is atrocious, it's because of the lifting guys!!"
>>37217068
I play soccer and I'm 220 lbs. There's unlimited substitution outside professional leagues. I bully people for 10 minutes at a time as the ref shrugs at people getting pushed off the ball, then go chill. It is much more fun than when I played in high school.
>>37217068
>anywhere near 1000lbs
Have you actually been anywhere near the 1000 pounds club? I've recently passed the 1000 mark and to be honest I'm not that big (205 lbs at 6'4"). That's the fun thing about strength training, you get more hyperplasia instead of useless hypertrophy.
>>37215088
and despite that you still look like shit
>>37217898
Didn't work for me, got to 230ish lbs passing the 1k lbs mark. I was horribly out of shape stamina wise and burly as fuck.
>>37217068
> Try joining a game of soccer
why would i ever want to do that? i can bike for longer with a higher average speed than i used to be able to, i can walk for longer without getting shin splints and i'm a much better skier and sailor than i used to be thanks to my increased strength.
>>37203644
I literally did 170 as my babbys first bench press as a neety twig faggot.
wtf
>>37203758
faggot
>>37203447
>fat powerlifter detected
>>37203774
Had a professional free climber in my BUDS class he hit 105 pull ups before the instructors stopped him due to time constraints. Basically rock climbers are pretty good at them.
>>37203827
how on earth do you train like that? pull ups all day every day or what the fuck
>>37217999
Whatever floats your boat, I just can't help but feel extremely weak and castrated when I can't even play a full game of soccer. Or that I am not able to do what I want with my body because I just don't have the stamina and endurance. It's a emasculated feeling
>>37203827
he could probably stab people to death with only his fingers by now.
I like how one fit guy being shit in bed means we all are. Just because youre muscler doesnt mean youre unflexable or gonna bust in 10 min everytime. Holy shit this is dumb as fuck.
>>37203827
>Jan hojer
>Unskilled
>>37217068
I assume you've never seen NFL players then?
Also, 1000lbs club... truly jacked? 1000lbs club isn't jacked, it's a goal for intermediate lifters.
>>37218168
Do you not lift and do cardio as well? How have you got so unfit you can't play a game of football?
>Implying body type matters at all
>>37218168
Just fucking do cardio, it's not rocket science
>>37203374
VICE ICE BABY
>>37218303
Does he mean 1000+ total? Im not even that big and thats shit all bitch weight.
>>37203374
This is how I filter peopele into stupid or not stupid. If thhey like or believe vice they are an idiot.
ANYWAY 1 min. Google search, here is the result hahahahahahhahaha
http://feeds.feedburner.com/WelcomeToStraightMusclePornstars
>>37203644
>>37203644
