> MILF walks into the gym
> short skirt and nips poking thru her shirt
fuug
>>36510036
kek anon you beat me to it
>>36510036
noic3
fucking milfs man. I want to absolutely ruin some of the milfs that come to my gym.
Anyone experienced in slaying beasts of the matured variety?
Cons of being a young and horny 21year old...
>hot chick comes into gym
>all of a sudden all my mind thinks about is fucking her, how I'm gonna fuck her
>can't think straight , trying to be cool
>>36510012
i want to put my penis in the tanned and blonde hair dyed 50 year old woman with fake tits and yoga pants at my gym
>>36511346
sometimes i then get sad because i think other people in the gym arent always thinking about fucking her but maybe they all might be aswell
>>36511323
I met a fresh divorcee at a garage sale she was having. Best sex of my life. She was 42 and was 22
>>36511379
And i was 22*
>>36511378
High test problems. Be ecstatic. Act out on those impulses
That's what I'm trying to do
>>36511323
be mature
>milf walks in gym
>always see her miring for months
>I'm 19 so I'm sure she doesn't want me to approach her
>it's push day
>Mr Hyde combined with a week of nofap flowing through my body
>doing dumbbell press
>notice milf staring at me from a few benches down
>DUNGEON SLAYER MODE BABY TERMINATOR MODE ENGAGED
>blast out a few extra reps looking beast as fuck
>don't look at her because fuck these hoes
>put on some of that new kevin gates
>pick my weights up and rest them on my knees
>god damn milfy is still looking at me
>give her a wink and a small smile
>oh god why did I do that
>fuck it alpha as fuck I'm so horny I'm ready to fuck sara silverman gorilla style
>time for some side lateral raises
>before my first set a guy lets call him Craig who works there signals me to remove my earbuds
>"what's up craig how's it goin buddy"
>"anon I just got a complaint from a female member that you have been winking at her and staring for an uncomfortable amount of time for at least a few weeks now"
>actually burst out laughing
>"We don't take lightly to this behaviour I know you are a cool guy but that isn't allowed"
>Try to explain my situation, tell him I'm the one whos being eye fucked and I acted upon it once in months
>"Yeah I'm sure she was checking you out, just drop it anon"
>guy is basically calling me a delusional dyel to my face
>"What the fuck does that mean Craig don't think any women would like how I look"
>by now people around us are aware there is an issue forming
>level 5 skeleton doing flies beside us has even taken a 5 minute rest period to listen
>"Anon I'm going to have to ask you to leave the gym today"
>"Alright this is your building cool I'll leave"
>get escorted out of the gym
>as I'm walking out I see the milf who has fucked my day up
>she returns the cheeky wink and smile
>are you fucking serious
>am I on a TV show right now why is this happening to me
>next day at the gym
>pull day
>doing my diddy lifts
>finish up, taking plates off
>>36511323
I work in a deli in a rich neighbourhood and there are so many milfs that come in regularly.
how do I escalate? There's a couple you can tell are somewhat keen because there's so much smile and eye contact interplay
>>36511682
Keep goin
>>36510012
>Home gym master race
>>36511682
I'm waiting for the rest of the story
patiently
hurry the fuck up mate
>>36511682
>same milf comes up
>before she can open her mouth I tell her to fuck off
>"sorry about getting you in trouble yesterday babe"
>"pardon"
>"you are always so quite and never talk to anyone I wanted to see you get passionate and release yourself....it was really hot"
>call her a nutcase and not to talk to me again
>she just giggles like a school girl
>"my name is Michelle"
>"cool I'm anon"
>"It's okay if you don't want to talk to me again after yesterday but if you come over tonight I can really make it up to you"
>ATTEEEENTIOOONNN
>cock standing up ready for battle
>not sure if it's the nofap or my mommy issues but I have almost forgot the incident yesterday
>sure I'll come by
>we exchange numbers
>text a bit blah blah blah
>that night rolls around and I'm pretty anxious
>knock on her door
>a guy my age answers the door
>"hey champ is michelle home"
>guy looks puzzled as fuck
>not sure if it's because I called him champ or someone his age is looking for his mom
>"mom some kids here to see you"
>michelle runs downstairs
>"Hiiiiiii anon come on in"
>Michelle tells her son I'm some intern at her job
>god damn what a psycho
>we go upstairs after the most uncomfortable 5 minutes of my life
>she tells me to get on the bed naked and close my eyes
>"now put your legs up"
>"w-w-what?"
>"put your legs up baby"
>put my legs up and prepare for the unknown
>she starts licking my ass
>wouldn't really call it licking
>more like joeysworldtour doing the nacho cheese challenge licking
>sucking on my balls and ass like they are a single connected entity
>never knew pleasure until this moment in my life
>"now come fuck me anon"
>we start off slow with me on top
>as it progresses she encourages me to call her mommy
>I'm down
>"tell mommy how mad you were at her yesterday"
>at this point I'm rage fucking her with more lust than I have ever felt in my life
>"cum in mommy cummmmmm"
>blow a load so hard free willy would be put to shame
>>36511840
>cat walks in gym
>always see her miring for months
>I'm 19 so I'm sure she doesn't want me to approach her
>it's push day
>Mr Hyde combined with a week of nofap flowing through my body
>doing dumbbell press
>notice cat staring at me from a few benches down
>DUNGEON SLAYER MODE BABY TERMINATOR MODE ENGAGED
>blast out a few extra reps looking beast as fuck
>don't look at her because fuck these hoes
>put on some of that new kevin gates
>pick my weights up and rest them on my knees
>god damn that cat is still looking at me
>give her a wink and a small smile
>oh god why did I do that
>fuck it alpha as fuck I'm so horny I'm ready to fuck Halle Berry gorilla style
>time for some side lateral raises
>before my first set a guy lets call him Craig who lives there signals me to remove my earbuds
>"what's up craig how's it goin buddy"
>"anon I just got a complaint from a pet that you have been winking at her and staring for an uncomfortable amount of time for at least a few weeks now"
>actually burst out laughing
>"We don't take lightly to this behaviour I know you are a cool guy but that isn't allowed"
>Try to explain my situation, tell him I'm the one whos being eye fucked and I acted upon it once in months
>"Yeah I'm sure she was checking you out, just drop it anon"
>guy is basically calling me a delusional animal fucker to my face
>"What the fuck does that mean Craig don't think any feline would like how I look"
>by now neighbours around us are aware there is an issue forming
>neighbour doing flies beside us has even taken a 5 minute rest period to listen
>"Anon I'm going to have to ask you to leave the house today"
>"Alright this is your building cool I'll leave"
>get escorted out of my room
>as I'm walking out I see the cat who has fucked my day up
>she leans back to lick, exposing her small testicles and barbed penis
>are you fucking serious
>>36511911
>>36511682
Nice
Both funny and bonerific
>>36511911
Oh dang anon, that was good
>>36511921
>>36511911
>>36511682
The only part of this fanfic that might be true is
>milf walks in gym
>>36511885
I don't even care about the goober's boner, I want to plow that girl until my dick bleeds
>>36511911
>afterwards we cuddle for a few minutes
>"sorry anon you have to go you can't sleep over"
>"okay that's cool I really enjoyed tonight"
>really would love to confess my love for her and stay in her arms all night
>leave and go home
>my dad asks me where the fuck I was
>tell him fucking some milf from my gym
>he just laughs and asks me where I really was
>tell him playing vidya at a friends
>I have sex with milfy once every week or two
>same scenario every time
>she starts buying me protein
>also getting some god tier massages
>anyways it's friday night at this point and I have been seeing her for a few months
>go to my usual club
>been drinking with friends blah blah blah good times
>oh shit it's Michelle's son
>we lock eyes instantly
>he comes up to me with a group of 3 other guys
>"oh my GOD it's the guy, the guy who comes over and fucks my mom and I have to HEAR him yell mommy"
>I realize this guy is beyond fucking wasted
>him and all his friends look pissed
>one Einstein clammers up
>"yeah you like fucking other guys moms you think that's cool?"
>"yeah I do actually, what kind of stupid question is that"
>they all look 55% more pissed after the comment
>before the talk continues her son punches me straight in the face
>from what I heard it was of captain falcon proportions
>slam my ass on the ground completely off guard
>guy and his friends are immediately kicked out by the security and get a good roughing themselves
>my bartender friends are stunned and we have a good laugh after, my eye is completely fucked up, end up scoring that night just from how cool it looked
>text my milfy that her son assaulted me and I will be pressing charges
>she begs me not to, crying about being a single mom and the kids troubled past
>I'm really just bluffing and I want his psycho mom to fuck up his way of living
>all is well with me and I meet up with my milf next saturday
>feeling devilish after her son "Dylan" punched me in the face
>>36512084
Please let this be true, I mean...I know it isn't but still
>>36512084
Gotta agree with >>36512135. Let's see some proof. Facebook profiles, a photo, something.
But if it's a lie, at least it's an entertaining lie.
>>36512084
>mention Dylan as much as possible while fucking
>"sorry your real son won't fuck you"
>"this is what you get for being a shitty mom to Dylan"
>"call me Dylan or you are getting slapped hard|
>"dylan...dylan...Dylan....DY....DYLLAANNN"
>we both cum
>she looks rather disgusted in herself
>I have the biggest shit eating grin on my face of all time
>I leave knowing that Dylan just listened to the most horrific shit he will ever hear in his life
>after that me and milfy stop talking as much
>if she wants to have sex she sneaks into my house late at night
>she confesses to me that it doesn't feel right after the last time at her house
>I say it's cool and I enjoyed our time and working out with her was nice
>before she leaves she says "there might be other guys but you are the only one who can call me mommy"
>god damn I still jerk off just thinking about her saying that
>only had sex with her twice after that
>sometimes I forget that we even met because she was a psycho who went to my gym
>haven't felt that much passion or love for a girl since
>no idea what she is doing or Dylan
>hope you enjoyed reading
Fuck you Dylan if you are reading this I miss fucking your mom
>>36512190
>I miss fucking your mom
>>36512084
Tell her that you won't if she lets you cum inside raw every time you guys do it, and she takes birth control sparingly
Give Dylan a little brother that'll show him
>>36511379
What was the sequence of events that led you you fucking her?
>mfw high test has interest in me
>>36511323
Does it count as a milf if she was 20? She has 2 kids
>>36512190
<-----
>>36512311
>>36512324
i dont think it counts if the kids a baby
>>36512382
I banged her in August. I think one had his first day of school that month
:/
>>36512324
>20 with 2 kids
no banging trash doesnt count
>>36512388
maybe the rule should be the kids closer in age to you than her
>>36512427
than you are to her i mean
>>36512378
that made me so fucking horny
>ayyyyyyooooooooooooooo
>>36512427
>>36512445
Makes sense. I was 26. She was a co-worker at a bullshit summer job I had. Didn't know she was 20 until I had her top off
>>36512190
>you are the only one who can call me mommy
There's this 40 year old woman in my class (nursing student). She has three kids and is recently divorced. We've known each other since freshman year and she has confided in me about details on her marriage and why it ended. We've grown pretty close actually. She herself has said she considers me a sibling.
She regularly works out, has an amazing ass and dresses incredibly sexy a lot of the time. I love looking at her and her beautiful legs.
Thing is, we make sexual jokes to each other all the time. If she wasn't already in a new relationship and didn't consider me such a close friend I'd swear she was flirting with me. She has kissed me a few times when we were drunk and out on the town, but that's it.
>mfw invited her to come to the gym with me one day
>she accepted
>mfw I can see her sweating and looking sexy as fuck in tight yoga pants.
how could you get hard knowing you are fucking a whore that is a bad example for her kids?
just saying
>>36512574
very easily
>>36511722
>2015
>not making meat jokes when you work at the deli
>>36512574
By not being an autistic sperglord.
>>36512561
>we kissed a few times while drunk
why didn't you fuck her then? I had a qt azn in our circle of friends do this one night and I took her to her place and fucked her. it was a little awkward for a week or two but things went back to normal
>>36512607
you have no issues being a cuck?
>>36511323
Yeah once.
It was cool.
They are not as hungry as TV would have you believe, many of them stay faithful to their husbands they just like the looks they can get from young men.
>>36512561
Also, one of my supervising nurses during hospital rotations is also really really hot despite being 40 years old and having a daughter my age. Great hair, perfect smile and gorgeous eyes. Lovely body too. We grew quite close as well since I struggled a lot during my internship. Since that time I had begun lifting properly and we saw each other again this year (she was a patient at the hospital now). I visited her during break and she couldn't stop smiling and touching her hair. She said how I look so much better now (fixed my skin, got a new haircut and started wearing glasses that actually fit my face, started lifting and making gains). I swear if she had had even one glass of wine that evening she'd ask me to meet her at the patient hotel that night.
Also another classmate of mine is "technically" a milf. She's 27 but has three children from a previous relationship. Stunningly beautiful. Tall, slim, blue eyes and blonde hair. Could be a model. We haven't been flirting or anything but she's a great girl and I just can't help but smile when I see her. I've figured out that we agree on how a man should act in a relationship and it turned out I perfectly described her feelings towards her ex boyfriend. I don't talk about this kind of stuff easy with other women but we hit it off instantly. I guess this means neither of us considers the other as partner. Which is fine really. I'm still thankful to know her. She's also one of the rare people to ADD ME on social media, and not the other way around like it usually goes. She's taken the initiative to start a conversation several times and it's a strange feeling.
>>36512618
We weren't making out or anything. But it's clear that we're decently comfortable with ourselves when slightly intoxicated. I've known her for three years and I see her every day. A one night hook up would be too awkward.
>>36512627
Fucking a MILF is, if anything, the exact opposite of being a cuck
Go back to /r9k/ and learn what buzzwords actually mean
>>36512627
>Fucking another man's wife
Literally the exact opposite.
>>36512654
or it could be the best thing to ever happen ever and you could have an experienced fuck buddy.
>>36512717
True. We're writing our bachelor together. Well see what happens. Hope I get to do her because she really is fucking sexy. I'm just too scared to ruin friendships.
>>36512807
I wish I was as socially competent as you
;_;
>>36512324
No, it doesn't count.
Let's analyze MILF: Mothers I'd Like To Fuck.
She has children; mothers do not have children; ergo, she cannot be a MILF.
Pretty simple shit, dude.
>>36512858
shes gotta be old enough to have mothered you
>>36512858
>mothers do not have children
Are you stupid?
>>36512190
This was fuckin decent. >>36512084
>>36511921
>>36511911
>>36511682
>>36512925
Not as stupid a the person asking if someone WITH TWO KIDS counts as a MILF.
>>36512858
>mothers do not have children
What?
>>36512190
i dont even care if it's true or not, made me laugh
>>36512324
White trashers don't count, mate....
>>36511911
The first part I actually believed was true, now you're being silly.
>>36512945
Is it really this hard for you to comprehend?
Is English your first language?
>>36513350
Hello autist.
>>36512561
>tfw I wouldn't fuck any of the 40-year olds in my nursing class with someone else's dick
why fuck old people when you could fuck young people
this is the question.
other than checking off a bucket list, why?
>>36511323
It was great. She fucked me senseless, paid for everything, then kicked me out before her kids came home.
Highly recommend, senpai.
They don't want your seed, are almost always fixed, and don't have time to bullshit around so they get right to it and tell you what they like.
Plus, they're not worried about you thinking they're too slutty when they ask you to cum in their ass.
>>36513461
Older women are sexy as hell.
>>36513461
Some older ones look amazing, not as many as when they are young but still
>>36512190
You pulled some Oedipan level shit on that woman. I don't even give a fuck if this is a lie, this whole story is hilarious.
>>36512190
>I miss fucking your mom
>>36512190
got a legit boner from this. True or not, it was good. well done
>thick ass high test walks into store
>too nervous to ask if she needs help
>fml
>hope she comes in again
>>36511682
>>36511911
>>36512084
>>36512190
You fucking savage got a pic?
>>36513502
I need this in my life.
I would absolute love being some hot milf's boy toy if it was all casual sex and her paying for shit.
>at gym
>Notice milf girl always looking at me
>she starts doing those weird criss cross things on the floor with her legs
>due to us always looking at each other for a good month I just decided to talk to her
>hey what does that do? can you teach me?
>sure
>we start talking regularly but just hellos for a few weeks
>one Friday I'm there she's ususally not and i'ts always dead in the gym
>notice she's here and we start talking saying it's dead in the gym
> she walks up to me saying if I can walk her out since it's dark and there is a strange guy out there
>say sure and walk her out
>i'm behind her when I notice she's wearing shorts "hey this is the first time you wear shorts you're always in pants"
>haha yeah thought I'd change it up
>"You have nice legs you should wear them more."
>...it gets quite when I realize what I said
> we get to her car and I start to say goodbye when she grabs me
>I know you stare at me and i want to know why
>...completely taken off guard don't know if I'm close to losing the gym due to sexual harrassment or what just blurt out
>I think you are attractive
>she tells me 'No one will know about this..got it."
>we start making out next to her car
>starts sexting me during gym time saying I'm sweaty and weird shit like that while we are both in the gym
>finally I guess she had enough that one Friday she says to just take a shower at her place and we will eat dinner
>find out she's a divorcee but cool with her exhusband but she has the house
>beat that shit up almost every Friday
She's out of town now due ot her kid going to college so whatever
>>36513867
Dude, they're so nasty. In a good way. If you can pull one, go for it. Unless she's completely bat shit, you will not regret.
Even then, the sex will be amazing
>>36512190
>>"call me Dylan or you are getting slapped hard|
>>"dylan...dylan...Dylan....DY....DYLLAANNN"
i wanna believe
>>36510036
noam chomsky looks confused and infuriated
>milf goes to gym that looks like OP pic related
>be doing deadlifts at 220
>suddenly feel so horny i add 100
>dl 320 like it was none
>fuck her in the shower
feelsgoodman
>>36511323
Don't brag about your homegym bruh, besides, we all fugged ur mum alr80 m8
>>36514333
Dylan pls go.
>>36514333
Shoo shoo Dylan we all miss fucking your mom
>>36511682
>level 5 skeleton
Fucking lost.
I fucked a 40 year old woman who posed for a near porn site called touch your toes.
She was such a slut. Benefits of working in a place where you're the only young guy
>>36511975
He fucked the Killer Queen
I worked at a famous/hella-expensive private school (just admin shit between college years) and the hottest gold-digging milfs would drop off their kids every day.
I once hooked up with a milf who came for a job interview. Never ended up actually fucking her though, but she gave me the best head of my life in a public park
>>36514328
Sure bro. Tell us more.
>>36512654
>patient in hospital
>served one glass of wine
FUCKING 'MURICA NO WONDER YOUR HEALTH CARE WORKERS HATE WORKING.
>>36512324
be prepared to say "my wife son" for the next 20 years (at least)
>>36510012
This makes me mad.
Why would anyone think it is a good idea to go to gym in a goddamn skirt is beyond me.
>like a week into no fax
>this thread
Muh duk
>>36514991
>no fax
>>36515051
>tfw can't fax milfs a photocopy of my dick
>the phone ringing makes her instantly wet
>the excitement she feels when she puts the ear piece to her head and the only sound is "KCHHHHHZZZZZ"
>she orgasms as the paper starts printing
>>36512190
>she looks rather disgusted in herself
I would come buckets from that
>>36512190
I know this is real, because there is no way any of you fuckwits have the imagination to come up with something like this
>>36512190
Why is this the most hilariously erotic thing I've ever read
>>36512084
>>they all look 55% more pissed after the comment
o i am laffin
>55%
>>36512311
being caught with corn rows should be punishable by death
>>36511722
Nothing, unless they are super regular customers.
>>36511682
>>guy is basically calling me a delusional dyel to my face
kek nice deduction
>>36515208
you are not alone, I kek'd
>>36511885
When he dies, I want to use his skull as a guitar pick.
>>36512190
If this is true its great, if its made up, its even more impressive. Fun read as well
>>36512561
I couldnt do this, I would have to fuck her sometimes altough Im too quite beta, eventually I couldnt take it anymore and let the animal in me take over, I am so horny since I began lifting that even when I dont fap for only a single day I would fuck every woman in sight
