Hypothetical
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You are currently reading a thread in /fit/ - Fitness
>YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING PRISON IN A YEAR
>YOU GOT WRONGFULLY CHARGED WITH CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE IN SOME FREAK LEGAL ACCIDENT, ERY CONVICT KNOWS ABOUT WHAT YOU "DID"
-What do you do in regards to your routine and diet?
-What martial art do you study thoroughly in the given 1 year?
-How do you prepare,
1) psychologically
2) emotionally
3)spiritually?
>hypothetical
Hope you like BBC ;)
Kill myself
Suicide.
That will stick around for the rest of your life.
>>36398575
I'd kill myself. I'd leave a letter to the parents, they'll be chocked and probably have nightmares about me killing myself because of them because "muh human brain"
>>36398575
Isn't the solution extremely easy?
I'd just go into isolation for the entire time. Tadaa. Don't have to deal with anyone that way.
Diet and physique would suffer either way.
>>36398575
What do you do in regards to your routine and diet?
Strength train +SS/ GOMAD
-What martial art do you study thoroughly in the given 1 year?
Krav Maga/ boxing
-How do you prepare,
emotionally, psycholgically, and spiritually prepare to die.
When I get in, Ill just start killing motherfuckers that wanna start shit until one of them eventually gets the better of me.
>>36398729
Isn't there a more practical behavioral approach?
>>36398857
being?
I don't think I could an hero if thats what your getting at.
>>36398883
Blending in and holding your own? Joining a white gang?
>>36398575
Heh heh, I'd be ready. I demand respect.
>>36398918
but if people already know what you did you aren't gonna blend in very well. Also, even a white supremacist gang wouldn't support you if you are a child diddler. Good thought though
>YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING PRISON IN A YEAR
Hey, that's not too ba-
>CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
Welp. Might as well kill yourself at that point. That shit will never go away, and you'll be hated by pretty much everyone.
>>36398575
all good, I dont live in ameristan where people get raped in jail
>>36398575
my parents are rich so at worst i'd just get a slap on the wrist.
>>36399054
People don't get raped in jail here either
>>36398575
>hypothetical
Why would you ever abuse a child sexually man what the fuck is wrong with you? You deserve all the BBC that's coming your way, I hope you like being a sissy. I hope you don't actually because that'd be even better.
>>36398980
No-one ever molested any kid. This threads subject line says "hypothetical"
>>36399096
It was to ensure those replying would understand the Darwinian training ethos I want to have. I'm not going to prison, I simply want to become one of the ubermensch. No 1488.
>>36399017
>Welp. Might as well kill yourself at that point. That shit will never go away, and you'll be hated by pretty much everyone.
Go on television and offer to undertake as many lie detector tests as people want. Go to any and every one and pass it, from local businesses to FBI-administered ones.
Allow respected psychologists to be there while you take it as well.
It'll have an effect even though polygraphs aren't 100% accurate.
>>36399098
>Hey guys I have a hypothetical friend of a friend that wants to suck dick, how would this person hypothetically go about finding a dick to suck?
>>36399098
>YOU GOT WRONGFULLY CHARGED WITH CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE
>>36398934
Kill yourself, tripfag. This isn't reddit.
>>36399123
Shut the fuck up retard. You got played and I'm not a molester. I live in Washington county MD. I AM 18 YEARS OLD. NEVER MOLESTED ANY KIDS, MEVER FELT ANYTHING APPROACHING THOSE KINDS OF FEELINGS FOR KIDS. FUCK OFF (I do have some psychopathology going on though senpai)
>>36399161
Heh heh, you got somethin to say buttercup?
>>36399161
>tripfag
>>36399166
FBIFBIFBIFBIFBIFBIFBIFBI
THIS ANON IS MOLESTING KIDS!!!!
I SEENED IT
OP, did you watch Big Stan?
>>36399201
Failtroll
>>36398676
Yeah id get on a shit ton of roids, get huge and blow my brains out
>>36399203
No lol. What's it about?
Yeah, wouldn't happen. I'm the kinda guy cops don't fuck with.
Nobody crosses me. Nobody knows my name.
I'm just a ghost.
>>36399161
lol you can talk tough online all you want but if Big P and Deadpool were here we both know you wouldn't say shit. You'd use more respectful language. They've been known to have quite the temper, especially Big P. You might upset and you definitely don't want to do that. Wouldn't end well for you.
>>36399224
about a guy who's in jail
>>36398729
>start killing
Never stop anon
>>36399224
Rob Schneider's character has to go to jail in a year, and as he's a tiny guy he trains intensely during that time so he will be able to protect his tiny guy ass from being raped by the big guy inmates.
Sort of like the premise of this thread.
>>36398714
>I'd just go into isolation for the entire time
did you ever see that "/v/ goes to jail" thing?
Some fucking autist goes to prison, every inmate begins picking on him, so he goes into voluntary isolation. He can never come out because then the other inmates will jump him for being such a pussy
>>36399333
Except in the movie, Rob Schneider becomes a master of martial arts capable of feats like the meme version of Chuck Norris.
OP will probably end up getting his butt fucked anyway.
>>36398575
>wrongfully
>>36398575
>IN A YEAR
Sure, makes a lot of sense to let you roam free for another year.
I'd probably flee the country.
>>36399357
that video was so fucking funny
>>36399161
I want you deep inside me ass. Is that it? Are you underage and this will be the 'child rape' I will be accused of?
This is exactly what happens if anyone from 4chan went to prison. Ignore the girlish French accent, just how he's treated.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjOkoyEYF20
>>36398575
don't drop the soap b r e h
>>36399394
>>36399405
Is this the same video?
Focus all efforts into finding a CO willing to work with me to bring in contraband for profit. If I can provide something reliably (drugs mainly) I bet the other inmates won't care about my papers as much.
>sell all possessions.
>live as cheaply as possible while preparing, allow yourself to lose gains
>acquire large loan in your real name
>launder money
>purchase properties in college towns to rent out for profit
>have all payments go into an off shore account via direct deposit
>get the best face lift you possibly can, abandon old identity for new one with rental property incone
>move to third world country without extradition laws.
>get easy job
>live off of easy job money and income property money
>acquire native wife
>roid to gainsville
>never go to jail
>>36399420
it is this easy. and i am not going to link the video.
>>36399502
Memeform dyel.
>>36399357
>He can never come out because then the other inmates will jump him for being such a pussy
Well, that's the idea - what's the point of coming out in the first place?
Just stay isolated. Better than having to shit in front of other people. I'd opt for isolation even if people didn't want me dead for some crime that was reprehensible to even inmates .
>>36398934
Heh heh, Big P takes the Big D from the GP for CP.
>>36398700
What the fuck are you saying
If you're going to jail for the crime you might as well actually molest the kid. Lol
>>36399840
OP here, you're a retard.
He said they'll be shocked, he'll kill himself which will be traumatic for his parents, and he's using a meme (specifically, "muh dick") to make a point that the lives of child offenders are worthless, though his parents will try to argue that he was human(humanism), and thus his life is worth something(in his point though child offenders lives are in fact worthless. On par with the ethical view secular morality - what is good is what benefits the autonomy of individuals and the well-being of society at large.
>>36398575
Do Starting Strength bulking on 6,000 calories a day so you get hugely built fat and simultaneously train boxing 3 times per week. I might do this anyway just so I become scary
>>36398575
This an American prison?
Well, i would get myself into solitary confinement ASAP. If the inmates know about what ''i did'' they would rape or kill me, or both, and no amount of training would stop that.
Three years of NEET-dom have prepared me for such hypothetical scenario, the isolation would be a walk in the park.
>Get jailed for fucking a kid
>Somehow magically survive prison
>Come out and be known to any- and everyone as that dude who fucked a kid
>Never ever again make any friends, hold a relationship or land a decent job
I'd reckon I'd begin strengthening my skull and spine by jumping headfirst from somewhere really tall and see where I'd go from there.
>>36400021
Always could be a bearmode lumberjack lel
Not worry at all because Child Molesters are usually separated from the general Prison Population for the very reason that the general population will almost always kill them.
>>36398575
why not go full trap mode and be as fabulous and sexy as you possibly can? youll be worth a fortune to the inmates and itll be fun watching them fight each other for your companionship
>>36399098
>threads subject line says "hypothetical"
Exactly. No one is saying it isn't. Why are you so defensive?
>>36399122
Shit taints your reputation forever even if you're proven innocent.
You could start over in another country if you got off though, I guess.
Sell everything I have worth anything, empty my bank accounts and max my credit card, take loans from anybody and everybody, and flee to a country that doesn't extradite to the U.S.
>>36399122
Do you really think if lie detectors really worked dont you think they would have given it to everyone???
>>36398575
Suicide, life is over at that point.
fake my death/suicide then skip the country. Fuck jail , especially if you fucked a kid.
>>36399928
Real OP here, eat a dick
My choked up to date on my way home and watch it again I have no clue who I was a great way of life and I have a great way of the day before I get my money and time to go back and I don't have a lot more to come do it for a while few days years in the world is not an issue with a great day for a few years back and the rest first time I in a the first half re download this and eyes are we going on in my room is
>>36398575
The actual real OP here. Guys was all of that really necessary? I mean all of your rude comments? Like really? Seriously? Don't forget that there is an actual living human being on the other end of the computer who is reading your hurtful comments. Just something you might want to consider before you decide to send another rude message.
test to see if wordfilter is gone
s︂︂m︂h t︂b︂︂h f︂︂a︂m
>>36400547
I hope you die in a violent car accident
>tell the tough-as-nails Russian mobster in the kitchen off-handedly that I saw a chicken in the yard.
>???
>profit
>>36400017
>the isolation would be a walk in the park
Oh really?? Spending years in a room with no tv, no computer, and no books--just a bed, a shitter, and 4 walls--would be easy for you? Extended periods of time in solitary actually drives people insane.
>>36398575
Leave the country
If I can't leave, roid and workout like fucking crazy.
>>36399660
> Just stay isolated.
For a decade?
>>36398575
Just commit sudoku it's the only way
>>36398575
I'd smuggle my ultimate blood katana up my ass so I could defend my honor when needed while I'm in prison. Also, I'd grow a wicked long ponytail. Nobody Fucks with guy who has a ponytail.
>>36400645
I thought about that, i assume that they would give me books, or i could scribble some shit on the floor or try and develop a conlang or some similar autistic shit. It all depends on what resources i would have. The people that go crazy are too used to stimulation and human interaction. Even i would probably lose my shit sooner or later, but maybe not.
Also, shit mane, if you had the choice between being brutalized and killed or living alone for a year-The isolation would be a better option.
>>36400547
It bothers me just like it bothers you, but people are shit.
That's the cruel secret of life: most humans belong in the oven.
![QZ0qcYg[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/4XpIDFC.png "QZ0qcYg[1].png")
>>36400547
>>36398575
you'd be put in segregation with peados
make a shank
stab peados
get solitary
when out repete.
>>36400816
scratch all that shit, i retardedly skimmed over OP's post.
Shit, if you were going to prison in a year in this scenario you might as well just kill yourself or leg it.
Solitary is still a better option if you do end up in prison for alleged Pedophilia.
>>36398575
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAHwnaYrk0k&ab_channel=JDP%C3%A9rez
Simple. I train in meditation and Yoga, then when I enter prison I enter protective isolation from the beginning. Then i wait out the sentence and try not to go insane.
