>"You're....bulking?"
i can see your bra doc ;)
>"Did you just say two scoops?"
>"No, I said twenty."
>How tall did you say you are?
You guys do know that you only need to eat an extra 300-500 calories per day on a controlled bulk right?
>putting a stethoscope around your neck automatically confers to you authority on matters of health, medicine, nutrition, and exercise.
Well I guess I'm on the fucking Blue Jays roster now because I'm wearing the hat.
>>35721179
You seem like a faggot
>>35721179
holy shit this
>>35721197
He's kinda right though. I had a clege professor with a PhD in Nutrition Science and she said that "serious athletes" only need 30g-50g of protein a day. Depending on body mass.
>>35721179
*tips fedora*
>>35721179
>Well I guess I'm on the fucking Blue Jays roster now because I'm wearing the hat.
nah you're on it because you're a loser
> 2 scoops of Creatine a day?
>>35721249
DESTROYED
>"a gallon of milk a day? Surely you meant a week"
>>35721052
Why do people do this? How do you fall for this? Do you want to be fat with semi gains?
>>35721386
>eating cleanly with a moderate surplus and plenty of physical activity will make you fat
not so fast, gains goblin!
>>35721249
B A N T Z
A
N
T
Z
>>35721246
She's not wrong though. You fell for the protein meme created by the supp industry.
Keep on enduring all those protein shits and diarrhea on the daily.
>went to Dr. today
>"So you're saying your medication isn't reducing appetite but you've lost 6 lbs since last visit"
>"Oh, that was intentional, I'm losing bodyfat"
>"Your BMI is 22, you have no fat to lose you need to start gaining some weight"
>"uhhh okay, I'm going to start gaining muscle soon."
>mfw I'm not even 10% BF yet
>>35721465
weight?
>>35721249
DESTRUCTION
>>35721478
5'9" 146lbs, about 12-13% BF
>>35721490
you're an inch taller than me and are underweight
>>35721179
This.
> natty lifting for 2 years
> 225 for 10
> 200 ohp
> 375 squat
> doctor straight up asks if im on gear
> and a second one does the same two weeks later
fucking normies..
>>35721249
Texas pls go
>>35721500
>underweight
>BMI of 22
I'm just getting lean now so I don't have to fuck with another long cut after I lean bulk for a year
>>35721529
>trusting BMI
>>35721052
>"Anon, cow's milk is terrible for you! Full of female hormones and antibiotics."
>"You should have a prescription for human breast milk instead. I can write you one now. They don't actually sell this in pharmacies, so you'll have to get it straight from the source."
What do you say, /fit/?
>>35721554
> Full of female hormones and antibiotics.
you're shitting me right now,right?
>>35721114
brutal
>>35721561
Cow milk has estrogen.
>>35721698
then why should we drink it...
>>35721114
>When will they ever learn
ruined a potentially great webm
>>35721465
Your doctor just called you a twink lad
>>35721521
What routine did you start with, and what are you doing now?
>>35721523
nah bro
>>35721521
225 better be your bench.
>>35721827
Well at least you have your baseball team, god knows there is nothing else redeeming about it.
http://www.kshb.com/news/crime/fbi-kansas-city-other-missouri-cities-among-worst-cities-nationwide-for-violent-crime
>>35722008
Dont live in Kansas City anymore dude. But the fact that you will google "whats wrong with Kansas city" just illustrates how butthurt you still are. Even after losing your ace pitcher you still got a lot of talk, but now there is nothing to back it up. Everyone knows David Price was the only reason you guys got so far, and he sold you out cause no pro wants to live in Canada... It is like fucking Green Bay with a shittier dollar.
I am excited for this season when your team will once again reflect the country it plays in. Fucking Irrelevant.
>>35721465
You need fat to be healthy
>>35721386
Because it works for roiders so normie assume its a good idea too.
>>35722124
200 lbs would only really be fat for a male if you're really short
I might have a story for this thread by monday. Im gonna see the doc to check if my spine is alright.
Inb4:
>what do you mean you squat 80 kg? I hope that doesnt involve putting any pressure on your spine, does it?
KC faggot pls go
>>35721179
>>putting a stethoscope around your neck automatically confers to you authority on matters of health, medicine, nutrition, and exercise.
also 10+ more years of schooling than you
>>35721114
>go to doctor
>"you look like a big and healthy guy"
Feelsgoodman
>>35722276
what did you say next?
>>35721179
>lurking a chinese cartoon board automatically confers to you authority on matters of health, medicine, nutrition, and exercise.
>>35722218
Bragging about a 80kg squat
>>35722299
of course i didnt say a thing and post it here like an autist
>>35721052
not this again
>>35722276
>for you
>>35722376
a lot of loyalty for a hired gun
>>35722409
fucking hell, I actually laughed at this
>you jack off HOW MANY TIMES A DAY!?
>>35722329
Its nothing to brag about, I dint want to post e-stats either. Anyway Id better get used to that humble PR, because if my spine is fucked up, my squats arent progressinha any further.
Btw, does anyone know, if front squats could possibly be better in such scenario? Dont they put less pressure on spine?
>>35722124
implying 200lbs is fat
>>35722168
agreed, manlet confirmed.
>so you're telling me you put how many hundred pounds on your back and sit down with it!?
>>35722251
this
>>35722456
calm down doctor, now is not the time for fear. that comes later.
>>35722409
>>35722551
keks have been made
>>35721529
>2016
>Using BMI
Spotted the retard
>>35721521
damn thats a mire in my opinion f a m
>>35722461
skateboard squats my nigga
>>35722081
Yeah Pillar, Tulo, Donaldson, Dickey, Encarnacion, Osuna, Goins, Estrada, and Bautista are fucking irrelevant. Sure bud.
>>35721407
When it comes to /fit/ bulking usually means IIFYM
>>35721457
I'm not small but 50g of protein a day for prolonged periods + serious exercise would cause my hair to thin/shed excessively. 1g per kg should be the absolute minimum long term for an athlete in maintenance
>>35723544
I'm doubting these are all the same OP. Could be wrong, but who knows.
>>35721249
REKT
E.....K
K.....E
TKER
>>35721724
Don't fall for this meme, milk actually reduces estrogen levels.
>>35721052
>You have a... Sick cunt? Are you a transgender?
>>35721817
SS + GOMAD
>>35721052
Two semesters of nutrition does not make you qualified to parrot some outside organization's broad recommendations for fat fucks from 18-70 with any authority
>>35721698
I DRINK A GALLON A DAY AM I GOING TO GET GYNO LIKE I ALREADY HAVE?
ITS GONNA GET WORSE?
PLS RESPOND
>>35721052
> anon, you were doing so well with your fitness thing and you look so good now. Could you please just help us to understand why you're trying to get fat again?
>>35722251
more like 5
>>35725244
"I'm trying to gain muscle, but sadly some fat comes with it
Don't worry it's just for uh... six months then I'll look like uh.. Brad Pitt in fight club(?)"
>>35721131
>Eating everything in sight
>Making it
Pick one
>>35727014
Fuck that should've been
>Not eating everything in sight
>>35723544
Jesus, the last time I saw this was when the girl flexing and pointing at her dish was added. What type of person makes these threads?
>>35727022
You tried
>>35721179
Nah bruh, literally having an IQ that is on average for their field higher than your combined with an insurmountable work ethic dipped in over a decade of emdless grueling training is why they are experts. Also
>physician caring about your no fap ez test practices
>physician caring about scoops of freeze dried yogurt
Nah mate they just havin a laff
>>35721246
As a physician if you can get 1gm protein for every kilo of LBM slowly throughout the day then that is the likely max you need. Source: my asshole because as a doctor I am not taught anything about whey dangers since it is not valuable. We learn about roids and overdosing on creatine, but i love it when people lose their shit of whey
>>35721465
As a physician I recommend you go to a skinnier physician. Someone chinese and male
>>35730286
>overdosing on creatine
this happened to me once, neraly died. had to get my stomach pumped.
>>35730327
How the fuck.. how much did you take?
>>35730417
I read something wrong and took 1g for 1kg bodyweight. I was overweight and took 1,3kg over the day. shit wasn't funny.
>>35722276
>go to doctor's
>have to take shirt off for a shoulder examination
>you look like a pretty fit young man
>tfw 26% bodyfat not even out of dyel mode
Y-you too...
>>35730459
WTF
T
F
Is this a new meme for Happy New Year 2017?
>>35721249
high level banter
>>35730459
you weigh 1300kg? yeah you are a bit overweight aint ye fatty
>>35730459
>1,3 kg
So what, you thought you'd have to drink more than an entire tub of creatine a day?
>>35730579
gotta eat big to get big
>>35721554
Drinking human breast milk is not only disgusting, its also dangerous. It carries infectious viruses and diseases.
You might as well be drinking that person's blood.
>>35722461
Only bitches use the "muh spine" excuse to justify not squatting. There's one every week on this board. If its bad enough you can't squat, get surgery. If you don't need surgery, you're just whining and making excuses.
>>35722502
More than you. DYEL?
>>35723544
How autistic do you have to be to make something like this?
It takes less time to create a shitpost thread than it does to copy that shitpost thread onto your image macro. So who really has no life?
You're trying too hard buddy
i went to the doctor once for a check up and had this female azn lady and when they check your heartbeat with the stethoscope she lifted my shirt and put it on my stomach and back to hear my breathing and she felt my abs for a little bit and was commenting on how good they look and how she wants to lose some tricep wiggle and i had a chubs so i was afraid i couldnt get up after we were finished from the exam table but it quickly went away after she started asking me if i drink protein and that it can be bad for me and to remember to drink more water
i shouldve greentexted that but nah.
>>35731263
No you shouldn't have. This post was perfectly acceptable in not greentext form. That shit is stupid. Every story doesn't have to be told that way. You should of however wrote it like this.
>I went to the doctor once for a checkup and it was done by this Asian lady. When she checked my heartbeat she lifted my shirt and put her stethoscope on my back and started feeling my stomach. She felt my abs and started commenting on how good they look and how she wants to herself lose some tricep wiggle. I had a chub so I was afraid I couldn't get up after but after she was done she asked me if I drink protein and how that can be bad for me so it killed my boner."
Overall I give your post a C-. It's not a D because it's not a maymay greentext story, but it's definitely not excellent and continues as one run-on thought.
>>35721249
>>35721052
>"Go...Mad?"
>>35731049
>on /fit/
>calling other people autistic and saying they have no life
>>35730459
I just imagined this Anon making protein shakes in concrete mixer, kek
>So are you sexually active?
>Well, have you ever had sex?
>Have lost 20 pounds since last doctor visit and am now very low bf
>"Have you been using any cocaine or heroin, Anon?"
>"I lift weights."
>"Lifting weights does nothing to lower blood pressure or cholesterol. You should focus on running or doing cardiovascular exercises."
She told me after checking my blood pressure and finding out it was normal.
>>35721099
Fucking hell that file name had me in stitches
>tell doctor I've been lifting weights
>"so you're trying to get bigger, is this because people are bullying you? Are you unhappy with the way you look? Do you feel inadequate the way you are now? Have people harassed you about your weight?"
>mfw
>>35721179
>Blue Jays fan
>>35721052
>"woah, you don't smoke weed bruh? like dude... what"
>>35722225
>A Rasm fan talking shit
>>35723544
>Those 2 Rich Piana threads that were still in there
>>35721490
>5'9 146 lbs
Yea gain weight you twink fuck
>>35721490
Eat you dumb fuck. I started at that weight and was practically a skeleton. The kids here are retarded with bulking/cutting. BMI is stupid as shit to use also.
>>35722081
>knowing this much about baseball
Holy shit man you should be lobotomized
>>35734578
>knowing this much about any pro sport
ftfy
>>35721246
>>35721457
>>35730286
https://www.dge.de/wissenschaft/referenzwerte/protein/
60 g protein a day is o.k. for normies. /fit/ needs more ofc. 2g/kg bw is unconfirmed upper limit.
>>35721179
kill yourself senpai
>>35730327
>>35730286
I know this feel all too well lad
>Buy creatine when 17
>read on tub you should take the equivalent of 6 tablespoons a day for a week to "load up your body"
>Down it for 2 or 3 days
>Wake up the next day in searing pain, with both my kidneys palpably enlarged
>Drank 2 gallons of water over 2 days and they returned to normal. Blood work seemed to indicate theyre functioning alright, but Im not surprised because I gave myself acute kidney injury and chronic disease is what fucks you in the end
TLDR: Almost became vitamin avenger via creatine
>>35721490
Tfw 6'1 145 lbs and 3% BF :/
>>35721052
At my last check up my doctor told me he was impressed with my weight loss and muscle gain (former 300 pounds fatty here, got down to a humanly weight 2 years ago) and when I mentioned bulking he said nothing negative about it and pointed out how much weight I could gain and still be healthy. He was even more impressed when I said I plan on cutting after the bulk to shed fat. Basically, if your doc is against you bulking it's because you're fucking fat as fuck or your doc is retarded.
>>35735649
Damn skeletons.
>>35730962
What is pasteurization for $1200, Alex.
>>35735649
>thinking you are 3% and still alive.
>>35735649
lol, 6'2 and 149
>>35721114
That's fucking hilarious
>>35721052
>woman
>doctor
Yeah right.
>>35721114
Wow they looked so tall in Rush Hour.
>>35722124
>>35721386
How do you build mass then?
>>35737612
>edgy
>edge
edgiest
>>35737612
Holy fuck it's 2016 you sexist piece of shit. Reported /pol/tard.
>>35737810
:)
>>35737804
>I'm edgy because I dont trust a woman doctor even though there is plenty of evidence showing the superiority of male doctors
kek
>>35721249
T O R O N T O
O
R
O
N
T
O
>>35721249
>>35733489
>thinking smith is elite
Kansas fag plz
>>35738202
>implying we're not all ai
fuck off human scum
>>35721052
Lady, just give me the happy ending.
I'm paying by the hour after all.
>>35721131
500kcals extra per day is still a fat gain of 3.6kg per month. Too much brah, go for 200kcal extra per day brah
>>35737635
kek
>>35737635
max par
>>35738324
I've seen that wrist tattoo somewhere before but I can't think of it.
>>35737635
fuckin hell
>>35721179
People who think they know better than doctors because they watch youtubers and read articles on t-nation are my trigger.
>>35731020
>If you don't need surgery, you're just whining and making excuses.
yeah bro just keep squatting until you actually need that surgery
putting heavy loads on your spine will actually heal it I read it on http://boards.4chan.org/fit
>>35721179
I have never seen our facility doctor use his stethoscope kek
>>35721248
>>35734922
Thought I made my hat choice very clear
>>35741805
Your right, you shouldn't ever put any stress on your body, it might get hurt. just sit at your computer all day playing video games, much healthier for you
>>35737635
lmfao
>>35725244
my mum's the opposite. freaks out if I eat any less than 2500 calories a day.
>>35731663
>she wants to herself
>>35722299
he asked me "was getting caught a part of your plan?"
>>35722456
Literally laughed out loud at this post
