ITT: things people say about fitness that make you go pic related
My co-worker
>I think I might return the fitbit I got for Christmas
>I read only it counts calories inaccurately, and people have gained weight using it
Brehs
I don't know anything about the fitbit, but that logic makes sense m8.
If it really is counting calories inaccurately and you're basing your caloric intake on it, then yeah, you will gain weight.
>Brehs
>>35393557
>that logic makes sens
maybe to a fucking retard, such as yourself.
How hard is it to cook all of your own meals, and use the goddamn label on the back of product to calculate calories!!!
You can still use the goddamn fitbit to record exercise
>>35393540
>I dont want to workout and get TOO big
this always triggered me even before I got into fitness. Like people really think you can just become this on accident.
>milk is good for you
>you need to do plenty of situps to get abs
SHUT UP
>>35393540
'Fitbit' is a joke. Anything you wear on your wrist that claims to be counting calories burned is lying to you. It's all based on statistical averages and pseudo-scientific assumptions, which gives a possible range, and just like treadmills at the gym it tends to the high end of the range so you stay motivated. For anything other than fooling yourself into believing you're actually burning calories, it's worse than useless. Furthermore you're putting your most personal biometric data into 'The Cloud', where dickhead corporations can sell it to other dickhead corporations, so they can nag you to buy more shit you don't need and otherwise invade your life more. Throw Fitbit in the trash where it belongs.
>>35393855
One of my number 1 pet peeves as well. My co-worker also said this.
>>35393875
If people can handle and break down the lactose, I guess I don't see the issue.
>>35393540
>rest days
>>35393897
I'm not endorsing the fit bit. but it could at least be used to keep track of your weight lifting/and or cardio progress.
If people need a tool to help them get motivated, that's fine. You and I know it's a crock of shit, but I suppose it has some use, if not taken too seriously.
>>35393540
not so much a saying, but people who just go on a treadmill and maybe benchpress for 2 hours a weeks, eat nothing but junk, sit on their asses the entire rest of their week, and then are upset when they arent all ripped in 3 weeks.
I think all this "GET ABS IN JUST 3 WEEKS!" shit has fucked up everyone expectations where they think if they arent ripped in such a short time, then the whole working out thing is a waste of time and they are a basketcase and then they give up on it forever.
>>35393933
people who actually believe that are stupid, or too young to know any better. If people are truly motivated they will figure it out.
During a lunch with a hamplanet friend from school I watched her eat her way through around 5000 calories worth of chinese food in one sitting. I had a fish soup and a proton shake on the side.
>You're so lucky who can drink liquid cals, anon. I can't even have a little bit of soda without gaining weight. You should be grateful for your genetics.
I called her a naughty avocado.
>>35393855
grills say this ALL TIME re: lifting.
>>35393983
are you being literal? how does one consume 5k calories of Chinese food? That's literally 2 full sized dishes.
>>35394023
>2 full sized dishes
standard portion for a hamplanet, sadly
>>35394023
I calculated her meal to be 5200 cals. Her trick is to order several dishes so we can 'share' and then eats everything. She had dessert after, an ice cream.
Are you natural or do you take proteins?
>>35394091
kek
>>35393602
You're fucking retarded, the fitbit records the burned calories
>>35394091
that is some dumbass shit.
>>35394091
three whole protein directly to my vein
>Dad is a functioning alcoholic
>Don't use those protein shakes they will do damage to your stomach
>>35394091
>told girl I take protein supplements because eating all that meat is hard
>says that's pathetic
>>35394156
It is.
>>35394118
>You're fucking retarded, the fitbit records the burned calories
Clearly I'm not retarded, because I didn't write that retarded ass sentence.
Also, that is but 1 function of the fit bit. You can track heart rate and other beneficial stuff. It's not necessary, but some people use it properly.
Courtesy of my co-worker:
>"If you're going to take supplements be sure to stay away from creatine. I knew a guy that took it and he got so big so fast that he ended up with terrible stretch marks"
Couldn't help but laugh in his face.
>>35394156
>eating all that meat
>hard
Stay Freudian, my friend.
At lunch, there's a little ad for one of those 'health drinks' that are being pushed so much recently. I'm eating with a few workmates. This paraphrased conversation occurs
>Me: Look at this shit, it's got like 100 calories a can, it's just as sugary as coke. People who drink that shit are idiots.
>Workmate: Nah, it says its got fruit. It's fruit sugar so it's good.
>Me: Calories are calories, if someone's drinking this trying to lose weight, they're not going to be any better off than if they were drinking crap.
>Her: The real problem with it is that it's carbonated. They use chemicals to do it, you know. It's bad for you.
>Me: I didn't know that, what do they add? (humouring her, she might know something I dont so why be a dick)
>Her: It's chemicals. Gives you cancer and stuff. It's not like fizzy water cos that's naturally fizzy.
She's under the impression, it seems, that carbonated water comes out of a fizzy spring. Subject changes and I lose a little faith in my species.
>>35393540
> "yeah, I used to squat in high school. I used to do something like 600 lbs, for a couple reps... I think"
>>35394201
people will believe anything if told it enough times. this is how stupid broscience works
>>35394244
"it's healthy because the TV says so!!!"
- Every fat American.
>>35394201
> "isn't creatine a steroid?"
>isn't working out that much actually bad for you?
>I do body weight squats.
It's none of my business but I always assume this face >>>35393540
>>35393540
>" hey are you almost done squatting? I need to get a couple sets of curls in before I have to leave."
>>35393540
>starting strength is better than PPL for gains
squats and deadlifts are fucking terrible for new people.
Me:
>You should do a routine instead of random machine bullshit
Gymbro:
>A routine is good, but you can make it doing a bit of everything like I do. Also back exercises make my back hurt.
Me: Why are you buying that protein shake if eat whatever and don't even know what a macro is?
Gymbro: No no it's OK I read that your body only absorbs as much as you need and gets rid of the rest.
God damn I hate him when it comes to fitness, but he has a car and I don't so I don't mind too much.
"you're losing too much fat! Your ass isn't big anymore!"
that was several years ago; it's the last place I hold any fat, and I was finishing out a cut.
shit, forgot one: "I don't believe that" tried explaining to someone how carbs & insulin are related. They flat out refused to believe me.
>>35394406
Yeah, wouldn't want them to make any gains
>aunt gets gimmicky weight loss/paleo/whatever the fuck cookbook for christmas
>front claims to have a 30 day diet plan to lose x amount of weight
>point out that diets that have a set end point are usually bullshit
>she says the book teaches how foods can cause you to not lose weight
>tell he all that matters is calories out>calories in
>she says that only applies to me because im young
>i ask why it cant apply to her
>"foods like soy cause inflammation"
>mfw
>drop it to enjoy christmas eve
>mfw she'll still be a flabby mess by summer and ill be lean af
>>35394494
weight loss gimmicks have been hoodwinking people for years.
my spooky gf bah gawd my spooky gf
>when we met she was perfectly curvy with full B titties and ass
>for some reason or another decided she needed to lose weight
>now the point her shoulder bones stick out, spine is full stegosaurus, tits look saggy now with less meat
>"baby you are emaciated and malnourished. im making you a diet plan to get you back on track and i also want you to come to the gym with me to put some meat on you. its not healthy"
>"ok ill try your protein shake but your veggies and meat diet is gross. ill just eat at in n out everyday til i start filling out. also i dont need to lift weights, im going to start running so i can get toned again. and so my boobs can perk up ill do this exercise my sis told me to try."
>proceeds to cross arms and do some weird pec flex thing.
fuk shes lost forever isnt she
>>35393926
Another thing that makes them useless is the fact that every modern phone can track your running anyway, In the same way fitbit does.
>>35393855
Adolf Fitler
>>35394685
>perfectly curvy
>full B titties
>>35394685
Womens brains don't function well when malnourished. But if she won't lift with you then dump her, you aren't compatible.
>>35394719
on her small frame they were big. also perky
>>35394762
i feel bad ive been so worried about my own fitness regime i failed to notice what was happening to her. ill give it another go for her sake but yeah i cant be around to see her selfdestruct like that or worse have our future kids see it.
>>35394705
Pronounced in German "Adolf Hitler" and "Adolf Fitler" sounds basically exactly the same.
>>35394871
Go back to Reddit
>>35394244
>100 calories a can
But this is very small amount of calories.
>>35395860
Not if you're drinking three of them a day.
Also how big is the can, I wonder?
>>35396447
>three of them a day.
300cal per day.
Still nothing. At minimum you need 1500cal.
>>35393540
>i want to be toned
>toned
>want to
God when will this end
>>35396447
Also, i'm more worried about its price.
3 can per day? You can spent your money more wisely.
>>35393540
>linebackers are stronger than bodybuilders
All that really gets me mad is people who discredit what I do, or fatasses who try to tell me how to look better.
I talk about going to the gym with the only other non-obese dude at my office, and the whales chime in talking about shit they've heard and telling me it's a waste of time or some stupid shit. Fuck off, fatties.
when other women tell me they just do cardio or 5lb dumbbell whatever, why fucking botherrrrrr
>>35393540
>talking about the gym with family on Christmas
>"anon I hope you're not one of those guys that grunts and drops weights!"
>describes someone deadlifting
I very rarely make noise when I lift, but this always gets me too:
>"if you have to make all that noise, clearly the weight is too heavy!"
Well if they're able to deadlift the weight then apparently it isn't too heavy
>>35396509
This is probably true in a lot of cases.
>We keep doing exercises for the whole body, I just want abs
>I do 100 crunches a night for abs
>abs
>fucking abs
>>35394244
>carbonated water comes out of a fizzy spring
you...you do know that's an actual thing? there is naturally carbonated water being sold?
everyone who goes to the gym once a week or just started going is a headache to talk about fitness to. and they always talk in memes because their only knowledge of exercise and lifting comes from social media.
>leg day
>do you even lift
>gains
>general broscience
get off the elliptical, then eat shit and die
>>35394414
>back exercises make my back hurt
!
>Oh yeah i'm gonna start doing this
>Yeah i'm gonna start doing that
>they don't
Seeing people do this fucking shit keeps me motivated
>>35396626
You just described 90% of /fit/
No jokes, most of the "knowledge" people have here is rehashed shit they saw on /fit/ before. No one does any research anymore, just parroting stupid shit they saw some other retard on /fit/ say a few weeks before.
If I have to see one more "brosplits don't work if you're natty bro" post one more goddamn time...
Be working out for about 2 years, me and some bros always keeping our gains and what not
>other bro who doesn't lift, used to but stopped, lack of discipline desu
>he goes back to the gym
About a week later
>yeah in like a couple months i can definitely be bigger and stronger than you guys
Like i hate this so much there are people who lift and eat good for like 2> years and faggots like him think they can look better in like 1/4 the time, unless maybe they roid but i doubt he will, anyways i hate how people are so delusional
Which is why i never talk about gym stuff at school or work or anywhere unless I'm with my bros or people who actually lift, but even then i keep that shit to a minimal, honestly no one really gives a fuck and i hate how people get so negative and defensive and shit when i do mention so i rather keep that part of my life to me
>I don't have time to exercise
>I'm too busy to eat right, lol
>I look sick at a normal/overweight BMi
>>35393540
Got one of these things for birthday (20th) from my Mom. Only a few days in, but so far it's okay. Anyway. Myfitnesspal says I need 1,600 to maintain. Fitbit says I burn, so far, ~1,450 on rest days (deskish job) and ~250 extra lifting. It should be obvious to any dipshit that the damn thing isn't calorie-burn gospel.
If one was eating 500 less than they burn, the thing would have to be OVER 500kc off to cause ANY weight gain. That's an insane amount to be off. I read people claimed to gain POUNDS w/ the things. Wouldn't it ring some alarm bells if a fitness tracker said you should be eating 600 calories more than a calorie calculator did? Claims are likely shit. People are tards.
>>35396699
>he doesn't understand sophisticated satire
>I used to look like you, anon, until my metabolism slowed down.
>>35396735
this one is the WORST
please STOP
STOP SAYING THIS
>>35394151
Iktfb
>>35396626
The worst is people talking about squats and ass to grass bro, don't skip leg day bro, gotta do squats or you're a pussy bro. Meanwhile, they've never actually squatted down to do anything in their life and they think they're ready to do so with weight on their back. And when they end up injuring themselves from their compete lack of awareness of their own mobility, they turn into the 'squats hurt your knees bro' guy.
>if it was THAT bad for you, they wouldn't allow it to be sold in supermarkets
>You dont eat until 8 pm? I could NEVER do that i NEED food hahaha
Also this isn't a say, but a do
>start bringing salads to work
>talk about losing weight
>drench it in dressing
S T O P
T
O
P
people that take whey everyday and think they need whey because they've been taking it eversince they began training and therefore have never tested being off that crap.
I'm sure there will even me some butthurts kiddos here that are gonna say whey is awesome because it's so convenient... nigga do you work 15 hours a day or something? who the hell doesn't have time to eat ? And the worst part is those whey addicts consume too many proteins in a day and don't realize those extra calories are simply stored as fat
I hear these from my hamplanet brother all the time.
>"It's all about metabolism, I know a guy that had to eat 15,000 calories a day to gain any weight."
>"BMI is bullshit. It's just some random number."
>"Carbs are what make you fat. It's not about how much you eat."
>>35396774
>consume too many proteins in a day and don't realize those extra calories are simply stored as fat
time to kill yourself, friend
>>35396689
hearing fatties' eternal excuses makes me giddy
>>35393855
Dude I love calling bullshit on this.
Funnier when they try to defend their position using "common sense".
>>35396791
see, I told you there'd be butthurt dyels because they don't wanna face the fact whey is garbage and they've been buying it for years
>>35396810
Didn't say anything about the rest of your post, I just made fun of your retarded broscience.
What next, consuming too much protein fucks up your kidneys?
>>35396689
>average PF member
>I not eating today. I'm trying to lose weight
>>35396786
that last one is kind of true, in that if you stay away from carbs you tend to generally eat less because you're not so hungry whih often leads to losing weight. They don't "make you fat", of course, but they're not filling and usually calorie dense so you can eat way more of them than you think
>>35393983
>ex gf had shit tier friends
>one is disgusting whale creature with stick legs and hilariously rotund body
>i have to hang out with them cuz faggot bf
>went to the pool, fat bitch ranting about trying to lose weight
>she shows us her "laps"
>what the fuck is this
>leave pool
>she suggests we get ice cream
>gets triple scoop bowl of shit and eats the whole thing
>gf patronizes her when she feels guilty
>tells her it's okay to reward herself
Broke up with gf a year ago today. She and her friends were dumb as fuck.
>>35393897
>statistical averages and pseudo-scientific assumptions
>your most personal biometric data
??? p l s r e s p o n d ???
>Lifting without a belt is unsafe
No its fucking not you retard, its safe if you make sure form is good
>>35396896
>mfw used to go to the same gym as a guy who would wear knee wraps, lifting gloves/straps, and a belt throughout his entire workout
Including, but by no means limited to:
>4 pl8 1/2 rep shrugs (i don't even know HOW you 1/2 rep a shrug, desu
>1/4 rep squats
>PULLUPS
>occasionally shadowboxing in the cardio area with his friend and talking about the feasibility of WWE movies irl
>>35396825
4 calories per gram of protons
>>35396447
a 375ml is stock in Australia, which is 160cal.
stock American is 355ml or 12fl oz, containing 140cal.
not a huge amount
"I'm fat but that's because my metabolism is bad, I don't eat too much and it's all good food."
Empty bags of chips in the garbage can and refrigerated soda everywhere.
"Soda is my weakness and chips arent bad for you, they're vegetables and my weight loss instructor said to not count those."
>>35397006
>chips are a vegetable
I'd probably have a stroke, desu
>>35393897
Fitbit flex owner here. I love mine for its sleep tracking and pedometer features. It looks pretty cool too.
>>35396705
yea, im pretty similar.
as soon as you mention doing something better or something they cants do; other people get very defensive and start making excuses etc. like chilll bruh, im not attacking you.
its like people wanna see you do good, but not better than them
>>35397006
the fuck kind of grown man can't take on 4 babies?
>>35393897
>>35397038
>mfw got a fitbit from my uncle since he didnt use it and knew i was in to fitness
>didnt come with the charger so it died in like 5 days
>still wore it because it projected the idea that i was in to fitness and working out
lmao@me
>>35394201
I got stretch marks when I first started lifting and took creatine.
>>35396928
lol some people man...
>>35397060
Yup this is its only flaw. The fucker is constantly giving me notifications that it needs to be charged.
>>35396474
you will easily eat 1500 cal a day.
If trying to lose weight, don't want to fill those calories with pointless drinks.
>>35396735
My old boss used to say this.
>"yeah, just wait till you're 40"
No. I'm not fat now and I won't be then.
>Mom, Dad, Brother(s) all fat and inactive
>I'm recovering Skelly slowly bulking past ottermode
>They dismiss it as "genetics"
>dad "lucky you got that fast metabolism anon."
>mom "Shame you're letting it go to waste" (cause no GF)
>>35397212
I really don't understand people who feel the need to drink shit that isn't water or alcohol
Those are the only two things you should reasonably desire to put in your mouth, liquids-wise
>>35397212
>Drinking soda and similar drinks everyday
How people do that?
I drink only tea (not green) and water.
>>35397156
People used to say to me
>Wait until you're thirty
>fat didn't happen
>wait until you're forty they said
>almost 44
>still waiting for fat to happen
>it ain't gonna happen, Gretchen
>>35393855
It's usually fat bitches saying that. Bitch, you're already the size of a Ford Fiesta.
>>35396735
No, dad you were never thin.
Neither were you mom.
>>35394244
what can you expect? people get their information from magazines that tell them what the new food to be afraid of is every week, so that they can market their fair-trade-grass-fed-non-gmo-low-fat-paleo-friendly-zone-atkins bullshit products.
No one wants to admit a calorie is a calorie, because it's fucking difficult for most people to restrain themselves or keep track of anything, so they can conveniently read magazine articles about whatever miracle diet is out that promises boundless, infinite weight loss while you eat all the good goddamn food you want because you're not allowed to eat carbs, or potatoes, or whatever.
>>35397226
>water and alcohol
you forgot milk, silly goose
but you're right, I don't understand why people just drink mixers on their own
I'm the only person in my family that lifts, and before my now wife met me she was one of the few relatively healthy ones in her family. I got her lifting weights with me years back and we've been doing it ever since. This holiday was fantastic because we saw both, and we, again, were two of the only people in good shape.
Everyone was asking us "how do we do it" and I just explained that we cook 90% of the food we eat and only drink water, coffee, and maybe a beer or a soda every once in a while.
Literally half of what's been posted in this thread so far was what came next from them. I don't even get mad anymore. I just laugh, and when the excuse is really bad, sometimes I laugh in their faces. I kind of feel bad and autistic doing that, but I can't help it and I play it off like I'm laughing at the concept and not like, directly at them.
But I try not to get mad anymore when I hear it, because fuck it, you can't reason someone out of an opinion they didn't reason themselves into.
My fucking dad
>Tell him I want to put on 8 kg (im 62kg and 177cm)
>He flips and tells me im crazy for wanting to GAIN weight
>"You'll confuse your body" whatever the fuck that means
>Sees me drinking shake after lunch the next day
>Asks me whats in it
>"whole milk, protein powder, banana, and peanut butter"
>Tells me to stop or ill become fat
>He goes on and on that ill get too big and muscular then stop exercising and become fat
>All this while he's eating fucking cake
>Explain to him that im just eating at a surplus to gain muscle mass and that ill cut the fat afterwards
>He isn't buying it
>Keeps shitting on me cause of the protein powder
>He's giving me fitness and health advice when he's 168 cm and fucking 80 kg
Jesus, i can't imagine how he'd react if i tell him im taking creatine
Also, curlbro friend in class
>Asks me about routine
>Explain that i go 5 days a week to the gym and have a routine which targets all muscles
>He's shocked
>Ask him how often he goes
>No fucking joke he tells me he goes once a week and does bicep curls for 10 minutes and then leaves
>Ask him if that's it
>He says he does tricep pushdowns sometimes
>Ask him how much he curls
>"IDK I just grab random weights"
>that feel when people in my family and circle of friends actually listen to my advice
>that feel when I got my little bro lifting and he's starting to look good
>that feel when I helped my mom lose weight and she is actually pretty knowledgeable now about nutrition
Only my semi-tumblrina sister remains unconvinced but she's getting there. At least she's not fat.
>>35396735
>Have mum that's been all about health since her teen years [horse riding, dancing, hockey, bike riding etc]
>She's pushing 50 now
>Still looks like she's 30 and I dare say cardio bunny mode
dad looks like shit tho lmao
>eat fruits to get buff
>don't get too big
>if you eat bad two day in a row the water weight transforms into fat
>kickstart metabolism
>breakfast or enjoy your mental retardation
>>35397461
>Rags on curl bro
>He does a brosplit as a natty
Top kek
>>35394091
>friend starts lifting
>about a month in he asks my routine (lyle mcdonald bulking routine)
>says it looks shit
>shows me a typical brosplit
>this kid is the most skeletal summoned bone demon you've ever seen
>tell him he needs to be on a beginner program like SS or SL
>"3 lifts a day? Lol nah"
>>35394091
hehehe
>>35393602
But if they got the fitbit to record the calories then using something else to record the calories defeats the purpose no
>>35397461
>>Ask him how much he curls
>>"IDK I just grab random weights"
had a chuckle
>>35398050
This is the reason I practically never discuss lifting with anyone outside of the internet. Every twinky little fuccboi and fatass wants to give you shitty advice. I get a headache from just listening to normies drivel about their faggy pseudo hypertrophy 9x12 curlprograms and how much they or "a friend of mine" used to lift. When people ask about my gains I just tell them I play football.
Nutrition is another peeve subject, I just laugh and tell people I eat whatever. Then they are jelly of my "genetics" or "metabolism" and drop the subject.
>>35398069
I think I'll start saying that whenever someone asks how much I lift kek.
The only reason anyone ever asks your lifts is to get an excuse to tell you how much they lift anyways.
>I'd change my diet but healthy food is too expensive
anytime anyone mentions metabolism
>>35397226
>alcohol
>Why would people drink anything but water and that thing I like thats terrible for you
Yeah, your addiction is more justifiable.
(In regards to slamming weights)
"had some douchebag does this while i was on the bench.
dear mr meathead,
no it doesn't make you look cool
yes it pisses us all off
and most importantly you are not getting the full benefit by dropping them, its called resistance training. look it up sometime
sincerely yours,
the swolelord"
Pic related: Right or wrong, this guy always posts stuff like this, and even tagged his mom in a gym pic saying he wasn't a twig anymore. It's ad hominem, but damn
>>35398130
this is true though. organic food is about 2x as expensive as low quality. meat substitutes are 3x as expensive as real meat.
>>35394244
YOU DO KNOW NATURAL FIZZY WATER IS A THING, RIGHT?
Also, 100kcal is a really small amount of energy.
There's a saying in Greek.
sciolism is worse than ignorance.
>Order creatine and Protein powder
>Father comes up to me coughing with a cigar in his mouth and tells me how that shit is doping, literally roiding and I will die from it
>Laugh plainly right into his face for a few Minutes
>>35398287
My dad does this too!
>>35394406
So if I'm a beginner should I be doing a PPL and ditch SL?
>>35394091
wat
>>35394201
You tend to put on some decent water weight on creatine, so yeah stretch marks are actually a possibility.
>>35397059
Looks more like someone is throwing them at him and he is just deflecting.
>>35394414
He is right on every point.
There are loads of tards who are ripped from doing shitty machine circuits. The point of a good routine is good muscle balance, safety and efficiency.
Literally lifting rocks and pushing really fat people in front of cars will make you ripped eventually given decent diet.
And there is a limit to how much protein your body can physically synthesize, beyond that, protein intake is basically more expensive carb intake. If his diet is unorganized and he doesn't want to put in the effort, heaping on an extra helping of protein just in case he doesn't get his fill is a good idea.
Also, if his back hurts, unless its a problem with his form then he really should abstain from the exercises that cause him pain.
Google anything of this for confirmation.
I hope you've learned something about humility now, anon. Don't be a dick to your friend.
His only crime is being inefficient.
>>35393909
What?
>>35396735
>at Christmas family gathering yesterday
>"holy shit anon how much weight have you lost?!"
>"I wish I could lose weight"
>"it's so hard"
>"it's easier for you because you're young"
>mfw
>>35393897
>>35393540
I bought a fitbit (with HR) in April and it's helped me lose over 60lbs. Obviously the calories burned is calculated via averages to some degree but I've found it to be accurate enough in the sense that I've lost the weight it projected that I would lose by eating as much as it told me I should eat. Was a good little motivational tool.
>>35396847
>carbs are not filling
What the actual fucking fuck are you saying.
>>35398767
He's right. They're not.
>>35394244
Actually:
Sparkling mineral water: Naturally high in minerals, is comes with bubbles from the spring
Seltzer water: Artifically carbonated water (not that it is bad, as your retard coworker implied)
Club soda: Like seltzer water, but with some added minerals for flavour.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/29/seltzer-vs-club-soda_n_1434891.html
>>35394091
THIS.
>tfw my friend asks me if "I'm on protein?"
>family often mentions how much my cousin and my step brother are ''built like a brick shit house'' and how ''muscular and athletic'' they are
>find out my now ex gf was cheating on me big time
>start lifting heavy weights, fast forward 2 years I'm 5'11, 94kg at around 18-20% and compete in PL and weightlifting
>family constantly berates me in front of each other saying I'm trying to overcompensate, say I look like a freak and I only ''lift weights because I was bullied''
b r e h s
>>35398953
they're fucking with you
and if they aren't they're morons
>>35398953
Nobody lifts because they love themselves, breh
>>35397059
those ain't babies, they're gains goblins in disguise
>chillin with friends and their friends
>get to talking with some guy about lifting
>"yeah bro back when I still lifted I was benching about 4 plate"
>I just smile and nod
>beta i know but we all having a good time and didnt want to ruin shit with trivial arguing
>convo goes on with some small talk
>start to leave
>the guy actually says to me
>"dude have you heard of crossfit you should check it out"
>mfw
>Five years older brother has obese gf and is on his way to obesity as well
>My parents and me are subtly criticizing the development
>He gets angry and says to me "Let's see how you are holding up when you are 29!"
I hate how people believe these completely implausible things just to justify their shitty life decisions. He's intelligent and all, but as soon as he feels better about the bullshit than the facts, he acts like the biggest idiot.
>>35393855
if this is my ideal body, how would lifting benefit me?
>my dad
>obese
>"no anon don't eat your food like that, you need to chew each bite for 30/seconds and your body will think you have eaten more so you will lose weight"
>"uhhhh... No offence dad, but your not really someone I would take diet guidance from"
>"yeah well maybe you should learn from my mistakes"
>wut
>>35393897
Calling it pseudo-science, your either trolling or stupid.
>>35399546
ass won't be mournful
>>35396666
Nice quads, Diablo.
>>35393540
just keep it, or wear it and not use it
>anon why do you work out and eat so much?
>>35399319
Not beta at all. Many a time I've had a guy tell me he could do 100 pull ups. Just nod and smile and let everyone keep having a good time. You don't want to be the guy who pulls out a bench and rack and makes the guy prove it and end up killing the whole vibe of the party/get together.
You know he's full of shit. He knows he's full of shit. That's good enough
>>35398279
Organic stuff, sure. But if you're willing to actually cook wholesome food it's not that expensive.
>5lbs bags of beans/lentils
>10lbs bags of rice
>seasonal fruits / veggies
>bulk almonds / sunflower seeds
>big boxes of eggs
Yes the meat can get pricey but you already getting some protons from the nuts/eggs so you don't need much actual meet to get to 0.8g per lbs body weight.
Step up desu senpai.
>>35397427
>you can't reason someone out of an opinion they didn't reason themselves into.
>you can't reason someone out of an opinion they didn't reason themselves into.
based statement.
>>35399774
gotta eat big to get big cmon
>>35394871
As an austrian, kek'd out loud
JA JA JA HA HA HA
>browsing this thread
>get a message so I go on Facebook
>first thing that appears on newsfeed is this
I've commented that the only way to (naturally) lose weight is to burn more than you consume but they just brushed me off. I decided not to try to correct the and let them learn the hard way.
>>35394821
>on her small frame they were big. also perky
That's not how bra sizes work, ignoramus. The cup size shrinks as the band size grows. A B-cup on a small girl is pretty small, a thick girl's B-cup is physically larger.
I wish I had a dollar for every time.
>>35396847
>carbs are not filling
>what the fuck are grains
SOME carbohydrate rich foods aren't filling. I guarantee you a plate of rice will fill you right up.
Fatass (seriously just a fat fuck) self proclaimed 'buff dude' coworker asks me how i lost weight (about 40lbs this year), tell him i just eat less and lift weights.
>He says 'you cant lose weight without running.'.
Motherfucker what? am i lying to you? Suck my dick
>>35400002
You are completely fucking wrong, great job anon
>>35400075
Ask him how many laps he thinks they were doing in Auschwitz.
>>35400092
Also every time HE brings up lifting his fake ass numbers increase by 50 lbs.
First it was 'i used to deadlift 300 lbs but i had to duct tape my hands to the bar for grip'
His past deadlift numbers are quickly approaching 5 bills, as if no one will remember what he said before and as if 5 bills is even impressive for a 300 lb fat fuck.
>>35398050
similar story
> turbo-auschwitz Hindu bone demon doing lmao1pl8 decline bench
> asks me for a spot
> we get to shooting the shit afterwards
> he tells me he's doing a split
> I suggest he should do SS/SL to get a strength base (kid was like 5'11 120lbs soaking wet)
> "nah I don't like barbell exercises"
>>35394091
Taking my daily doses of protein brah
My friend is trying to lose weight. She asked me how I stay thin, so I told her about calories. She said she doesn't believe in calories, and she was just gonna do crunches. Now, you and I both know you can do crunches until you're blue in the face, and they'll build muscle, but they aren't gonna burn much fat, so if anything they make you look fatter. Anyway it's four months later and she's gotten even heavier. She now counts her steps using her phone, and admits that when she doesn't feel like walking she just shakes the phone. (Why you lying to yourself doe?) So walking to and from her car counts as exercise, walking to the fridge is exercise, going shopping is exercise... She said walking around the block was an accomplishment. She's about 160 or 170 lbs. She said she likes her "big legs."
She said she was skinny and ate like a pig anyway back when she used to run track. So her plan is to eat how she used to and just walk more. (30 minutes a day at most.) In any case, walking 30 min isn't equivalent to running 30 min. I tried, but if I say much more she'll just get mad at me.
I don't think she's gonna make it.
>>35394372
Nothing wrong with this.
>learn correct form with no weight to injure yourself with
>babby introduction to leg day
>accessible, can do them anywhere
>good as a quick addition to any other plan
>can still feel a burn
>Saitama does them
>>35396524
Those little two pound weights.
I was on a site looking for new exercises to add in, and it said, "If a 3 lb weight is too heavy for you, try a 2 or 1 lb, or omit it entirely." I just stared at my phone for a good minute and exited that site.
>>35400161
Tell her you're mirin her bulk bro.
>>35400083
I'm not sure how many infographics the average dude needs to understand this, but he's correct.
I wear a 30D and my sister is a 36C and much, much larger than I am.
>>35396588
Carbonated water is made by forcing c02 into water through pressure
>>35400141
>doing incline bench
>won't do barbell exercises
>120 lbs
>bench 1pl8 incline
this just doesn't add up
>>35399465
>visit my cousins out in the boons
>the youngest one is about 19, has a kid already of course
>she's a fucking ambulocetus
>her older sister is 22, has two kids, and is a minimoon
>"It's hard to stay thin after you have kids lel"
>their mother has 10, yes ten, kids, is sitting on the other end of the couch, and weighs 130 at most
>this girl is probably getting near 200 and the other maybe 170
I don't understand. Do they not listen to the shit that comes out of their mouths?
>>35400002
>tfw female and don't understand this magic
Why they have to make shit complicated? At least you can just walk into a VS and get measured for free so I don't have to care about this ridiculous sizing system.
>>35400002
This is fucking retarded, who came up with this shit?
>when people think eggs are bad because of the yolk
>when people think protein shakes are some magic drink
>when people can't think of an insult for a ripped guy so they claim he has 'no calfs'
>people who train calfs
>people who think abs are just low bodyfat
>>35393540
i have a lot of chick friends so this shit is perpetual for me
>I want to turn the fat on my stomach into abs so what ab routine should I do anon
>how can I get a big butt? I was thinking of doing 25 squats a day
>from HS weights coach: put your hands together when doing upright row and bring your thumbs to your eyes
>also from HS weights coach: do SLDLs on top of 3 elevated boxes all the way to the floor with 4 seconds up and down
>HS weights coach again: POWER SHRUGS! jump up on your toes while doing shrugs
>man this guy was a real fuckin shitleopard: don't switch arms on lawnmower starts just alternate what arm you use every workout
>actually borderline retarded: do front felt raises, side delt raises, and "angle" (what) raises, 12 reps each, in a single set, in 30 seconds
>"deadlifts fuck up your back bro"
>"you're arching your back too much on the bench you need to be completely flat to hit your chest" fucking retard shut the fuck up
>lifting weights stunts your growth
>skinny dude claims to bench 195 for 3 sets of 10 to my friend, I tell her that's ass shit, she responds "I believe him he works out like 3 times a day"
>"wanna come to cross fit with me"
>"not to be rude anon but the people you see on TV like the strong lifting people are really big and you kinda aren't as big as them" this was in grade 10
>"well yeah a person that has been lifting weights for under a year probably does not equate to a person who has been doing so for decades and also use steroids I would not think"
>"oh" turns around
>this one girl constantly posts on Facebook and Snapchat about how she works out and how physically fit she is and oh I'm so glad I found physical fitness it has changed my life so much I'm so proud of myself
>worked out with her a few weeks ago and she uses like 3 machines (yep you guessed it, low rep high weight) and then does a few sit ups and planks and then runs on a treadmill for like 10 minutes and calls it quits
>>35400002
This is even worse than imperial units
Is there an SI unit for measuring tits?
>>35400350
>>35400354
From what I can gather, the number is the width around the body and tits? So 30 would be 30 inches around right?
Then shit just gets fucked up with the random letters
>>35394406
Wat?
I made fucking mad DL gains as a noob.
>>35400389
I guess.
Cup size should be the difference between the band measurement around the tits and the torso measurement under them, that how it makes sense to me.
>>35400258
You're both wearing the wrong size
>>35400002
Lots of bramakers don't even use that system at all though
They have their own special systems to make it more fun for everyone
>>35399811
>He knows he's full of shit
maybe, maybe not. there are enough idiots that have just no formchecking at all and think they are able to do 100 pushups when they can barely do 10 real ones. it is prob the same with pullups.
>>35400371
>>worked out with her a few weeks ago and she uses like 3 machines (yep you guessed it, low rep high weight) and then does a few sit ups and planks and then runs on a treadmill for like 10 minutes and calls it quits
thats really not that bad for the average woman
>>35397226
MILK FOR THE MILK GOD
>>35400476
That's because your 'average woman' would suck more dick than an AIDS convention if semen tasted of jello and call it a fat-free, all-natural, calorie-negative health snack.
>>35398473
No stick with SS/SL until you hit a plateau. If you are stalling, there is no point keep doing them.
>>35393540
> fit friend shows me pic of his fit buddy
> "he's not natty tho, he's on creatine"
lost my shit
>>35393540
>Don't get too big anon
>natty
>too big
>fucking pick one and only one grandma
>>35400404
That's exactly what it is, these people are fucking morons
>>35400364
Abs are 90% low bf. You are just being picky about that one.
>>35400329
decline, not incline
>>35400389
Idk. They take two measurements. One under the boobs and one at the widest point. Then they derive a size from that.
>>35400531
Does she at least look good?
>omg don't take protein! Don't you know anabolics shrink you genitals?
>>35400672
This. This is why skinny 14 year olds have abs because they're Auschwitz mode and do 20 sit ups a day.
Thanks for the new trip
>>35400827
You're welcome, faggot
>>35393895
How do abs work? I don't do much core but I still got some. Is it just low bf?
>>35397847
>if you eat bad two day in a row the water weight transforms into fat
H--what? How the fuck...magic?
fucking magic alchemy!
>don't eat under the influence of Jupiter or you'll get fat
>>35400002
more magic!
Thank Christ I'm gay.
magic!
>>35394244
Naturally carbonated water does actually exist
>>35400827
>using a trip
If you want a username, reddit is a really cool place :^)
>>35394091
>tfw I just started getting into /fit/ and I wasn't really sure what that phrase was so cringeworthy for a good couple seconds.
>>35393540
>I don't get why I'm not losing as much weight from my legs, I am walking more
>Calories in calories out is bullshit, I saw my skinny friend eat a whole pizza once
>You can bench/squat/dead lift X? I used to go gym and could do twice as much (tfw 230kg dead lift, tfw your short fat manager claims he used to be on par with world record holders)
>Is yoga as effective for losing weight as running?
>There's no point in exercising, you just have to maintain it, even then you just wear out your joints
>I'd rather enjoy a slice of cake than be happy about some silly achievement (after I did a 12 mile mud run raising £600 for a cancer charity)
>I want to tone up
I fucking hate working in an office, everyone is an armchair health expert that barely moves all day and takes the lift up 2 flights of stairs and gets in 10 minutes early to have a parking space closer to the office.
>>35401111
>mfw I got quads for the first time.
>>35396774
>And the worst part is those whey addicts consume too many proteins in a day
Don't you mean they consume too many calories then?
>>35401116
>I'd rather enjoy a slice of cake than be happy about some silly achievement
Ah yes that fucking lie that's spread all around. You can actually taste them crying on the inside as they spout this shit.
The truth is very much like what my sister said:
> I can either be unhappy and fat or unhappy and thin, I'd rather be unhappy and thin
>I won't go to gym to lift weights, that's for obsessed pricks and end up looking disgusting and too big
>it's not me, it's my metabolism I can't do anything, I'm not going to get obsessed over it, what matters is the inside
>just need to do some crunches and push ups everyday, but i'm not going to become obsessed over it (and never does even this because lazyness)
people love to use the word "obsessed"
>>35397141
But can you easily do that, cover your protein needs and do it without spending more than 10 minutes on the protein?
>>35394494
>relatives telling me I'll be fat like them one day because muh old metabolism
>>35393897
I second this, I got a fitbit too and you
L I T E R A L L Y
can't do anything if you don't open an account. You can't even set up the Flex without an online account and an Internet connection.
>>35393602
>>35394175
>You can track heart rate and other beneficial stuff
Not on my flex. I don't know if they are tracking that, they won't show me and given the proprietary protocols I can't know.
Counting calories, cooking your meals, "reading the goddamn label" is myfitnesspal's realm. "Tracking exercise" with fitbit seems a gross mistake, it can't even track decently steps and distance covered. It seems just a fucking botnet.
The only good thing about this wrist is maybe the "silent alarm" - but again, "sleep as android" is accurate and gentle enough for me to wake me up in the least traumatic moment at the end of my programmed sleep. The fitbit "silent alarm" needs to be sync'd with an online server TOO
Besides, there's an open specification wrist band (angelsensors) which got crowdfunded recently. You can get
FOR REAL
your heart beat and a bunch of data
WITHOUT AN ONLINE ACCOUNT
(and anyone can program apps for that wrist band)
Price? It's the fucking same price of the Flex band.
TL;DR fitbit is just an average plastic shit people is getting used to present to "fit" (or wannabe-"fit") relatives and friends on Xmas and the like. Maybe is a "motivation" for people like >>35398703 but really, is like's Dumbo's feather
>>35397253
>Gretchen
Are you 44 or 144?
>>35396760
My fucking sides...
>>35401650
>not getting obvious mean girls reference
stay pleb
>>35400002
virgin detected
>>35398703
>tumblr hated julius because they thought he was always fit
>based julius started as a fatty
>>35397853
I do PPL
>>35393540
>>35393602
The fitbit is inaccurate in counting calories though, it does make sense to get return that overpriced POS gimmick. If you can't keep a real journal that you can cross reference and double check, you're a lazy fuck who doesn't deserve to live.
>>35397226
Hey, fizzy drinks might be bad for you in large quantities, but not in moderation.
>>35393855
For guys yes, for girls no. Girls can and do get too big, it affects your health if you're a certain bf% too low. I personally already have giant muscular thighs that don't fit anything normal and am trying to actively make them smaller
>>35396774
>4cal chemical becomes a 9cal chemical
anon you figured out how to make infinite energy
>>35400209
what is even the point? All females I know can lift 2lbs in any excersize
MAYBE lateral raises if you are an ultra skeleton
>>35400873
yes
>>35401935
>I personally already have giant muscular thighs that don't fit anything normal and am trying to actively make them smaller
post pics please
>>35394685
Hello eating disorder
Run. Just run away. No one deserves that shit.
>>35396928
Kek'd at the WWE part
>Lifting for 5 years
>5'11, 204lb, 12%BF
I've been accused of being on steroids by at least 4 people I work with, two of which have also defended obvious Juicers like the Rock as 'nah bro they're natty'.
Blows my mind how anyone in real life that has a bit of muscle is a juice head but people will actually get upset when they're 6' 240lb 6%BF all year round instagram models are accused of juicing.
>>35402399
Damn, could I see a body pic? I'm also 5'11 (currently 170 lbs, ~12%bf) and wondering about how big 200 would look.
>>35396735
I get this all of the time around my family, except it's usually in the form of
>once you get to X age you won't be able to eat like that and not gain weight
Little do they know that that's the idea now kek. I don't even bother attempting to explain what I'm doing.
>>35401696
>/fit/
>mean girls reference
what the fuck
>>35394494
I'm so tempted to go into the bullshit diet industry because it's so fucking easy to trick people into buying useless crap
>>35402562
personally i wouldnt be able to live with myself, knowing people out there buy my shit because they dont know better. then there are people who see right through my fake bullshit and tell others how bullshit it is too.
>>35397427
Good post. I wish the best for you and your wife. Have strong children and make us proud.
>>35398279
Here's one
People who equate healthy with organic
It's just a label that justifies charging more
The rest of the produce is just as good
>meat substitutes
>meat isn't healthy
No, you eat meat you fucking hipster
>>35400457
Kipping
And since crossfit uas become so mainstream more and more people thinks thats how youre supposed to do it
>>35400330
Easy
The mother stayed thin because she had to feed 10 kids
The young mothers got fat because they ate their siblings
>>35397853
>natty
>he said he takes creatine
>try again
>>35398555
I don't fuck with him. It's his life he can do whatever he wants. Just wanted share some info with him and he ignored it so whatever.
>>35399316
Same thing
>>35402653
There's nothing wrong with kipping. Why your autism can't accept that different exercises do exist?
>>35399630
There's some truth in this
His explanation isn't quite right, but if he follows that he'll lose weight compared to stuffing his face as fast as he can.
It takes approximately 20 minutes to feel full after you start eating, regardless of how much you actually ate. So if you eat slower you end up eating less but still being satisfied a few hours
Though I don't know how this works with obese that seem to shovel all day nonstop.
>>35400364
>eating egg yolks
confirmed not gonna make it
>>35400330
>I don't understand
Meth?
>>35399998
My dad's wife is doing something like this. I don't want to even bring it up with her because I know it's probably just some bullshit that the fitness industry does not want you to know.
Which reminds me of a couple land whales I met in college. These girls were massive. And all they would talk about is having copious amounts of sex, eating containers of ice cream in a sitting, and talking about diet bullshit like green coffee bean extract. Pic related is one of the girls
>>35400371
>low rep high weight
do you mean high rep low weight? because low rep high weight is the way it should be...
>>35400364
What's wrong with training calves?
>>35402782
i have a sense theres some potential to be cute underneath all that fat
anyone familiar with twitch know this guy? he's been training and paying for a personal trainer for over 2 years and still looks like this.. how is that even possible? he talks about fitness and shit on his stream all the time, too. dude literally does nothing but play video games for a living how the fuck is he not swole as shit by now.
>>35402794
That guy is just a calflet
Training calves is all I look forward to on leg day
