This is so much worst than I thought it would be. Fox didn't try at all.
MCU Fantastic Four would be as profitable as The Incredible Hulk
I for one blame Reed Richards
>>83529830
I just can't think of any possible way to do Fantastic Four in modern day, but this movie definitely wasn't a step in the right direction.
>>83529889
But the Fantastic Four are all about the advancement of science. How doesn't it fit the modern world?
>>83529927
I didn't say they don't fit in the modern world, the Fantastic Four as they are just comes off as dated.
I could only see the FF working well in the 60's or mid 80's.
It's a solid D+
>>83530051
Well they did work in the 60's. How are they dated, though?
>>83530081
It's an F-
>>83530135
I don't know how to describe it if you don't know what I mean or agree.
>>83530202
You should try anyway. Communication is important, your inability to express yourself is going to hinder you in life.
>>83529796
Why would you waste 95℅ of your runtime on the origin story
>>83530256
Because it's going to be a long-running series with lots of sequels?
>>83530268
Kek
>>83530221
>your inability to express yourself is going to hinder you in life.
It already has, I started browsing /r9k/ this week.
i actually enjoyed a lot of rise of the silver surfer. it wasnt good but i enjoyed a lot of it.
>>83530308
I'm sorry to hear that.
>>83530221
only against people like you who don't understand obvious things like the fact that fantastic four has a tone incompatible with the modern day
>>83530313
Never saw it but the original FF movie was surprisingly fun and the stuff they had going there did have potential for improvement.
>>83530340
Don't be salty.
>>83530318
It's alright. Hopefully I'll be dead by next year.
>>83530313
At least Rise has action in it, and the actual Surfer was done pretty well.
It's really outstanding just how monumentally boring that first Tim Story Fantastic Four movie is. Nothing fucking happens, it's a 2-hour first act just like Tranktastic but without the excuse of being chainsawed to pieces by the studio.
It honestly feels like an extended pilot for a bad 90's UPN genre show.
I still say that this movie was decent up until the last, what 20 minutes? I liked the idea of it but it definitely needed tightening up.
It was the perfect shitstorm
>A inexperienced director with only one movie under his belt
>FOX hires this new blood and needs to have something in the works or else the rights automatically revert back
>Several months of shooting, Trank is reportedly under the influence repeatedly, harassed Kate Mara, damages a rented home, micromanages actors on when to blink and to tone down emotion
>FOX is kept out of Tranks loop, forcefully send new writers and editors for reshoots and to salvage what was shot in order to make the already pushed back deadline. Tranks original cut didnt have an ending
>Trank is erratic and posts on 4chan gossip
>Studio spends a pretty penny on marketing and a infamous IHOP ad
>Night before release Trank posts on twitter how his original vision was butchered by corporate meddling, quickly removes post but the damage is done
>Bad press and word of mouth tank sales
>>83530523
It's just Josh Trank continuing to rip-off Akira.
He turned Dr. Doom into a half-assed Tetsuo.
>>83530723
Was there a scene of Doom and Richards shouting at each other?
>REEED!
>VICTOOOR!
>REEED!
>VICTOOOR!
>>83529796
>Fox didn't try at all.
More like Fox completely fucked up the movie in last minute panic driven re-shoots when they butchered Trank's original body horror premise in favor of a more traditional FF movie. The first half of the movie is pretty good, it starts to fall part hard in the last third when it becomes a generic capeflick.
>>83530741
That would imply anyone in Tranktastic raised their voice above a dull whisper.
>let's cast Reed with a guy famous for playing loud, brash assholes and never have him raise his voice or show any emotion beyond dull, mouth-breathing romance with Sue
>>83530778
The first half is shit too. All the faux-Amblin kids stuff is terrible, and the movie rushes through decades of life without exploring any of these characters as people. You could skip right to when the team enters Planet Zero for the first time and miss almost nothing about these characters.
Trank didn't have any better handle on what he was doing then Fox did.
>>83530741
Reed screamed at Doom, but Doom didn't reciprocate.
>>83530386
What is dead may never die
>>83530778
>The first half was pretty good
I am baffled as to why so many people say this, because its shit too. There is zero chemistry with these people, the time skip isnt necessary, and there are several "WHY?" moments that bog it down. Im convinced that the second half is so shit that people look at the first as something good by comparison
>>83530950
what? shut up.
>>83530981
>There is zero chemistry with these people
Well I have to disagree, the team building the teleporter was pretty comfy and they had nice interaction.
>>83530386
Thanks for all that anon.
Having very little knowledge of the F4- here is why I think they are dated.
Cliche' team dynamic.
>Reed- the leader is a straight lace clean cut father figure
>Sue- Mother figure, token female doesn't have a consistent characterization outside of her relationship to Reed
>Johnny- The comic relief
>Ben- Big guy scary guy who is sensitive and gentle inside.
Ben Grimm is probably the most interesting character which is why he had his own ongoing for a few years. But all of them are what we've seen before without the spice that other superheroes have. Spices like being poor or oppressed minorities or alcoholics.
>>83531043
It's a line from Game of Thrones. Here's a more helpful one:
"...Speaking for the grotesques, I would have to disagree. Death is so final while life is always full of possibilities." Tyrion "The Imp" Lannister
>>83531121
>Comfy
I hate this word. Anyway to the point: You know Ben never said a word to Sue the entire film right? Or hey how about that scene where Sue an Reed talk about music briefly? Yeah they certainly hit it off great....
>>83530340
Only obvious to you buddy
BBQ Man was kinda cool. He was the only one who really had any characterization. As usual, they cpuld just have given him a solo movie as some other character.
>>83531192
Ben can be an alcoholic, and Reed could be black.
Or Sue & Johnny could be black. Isn't Sue interested in science too?
I feel like that was a shit retcon, but it's something.
And unless my dick grows at least three inches overnight, there's no possibility my life will get better.
>>83531411
>there will never be a movie where Spidey & Torch just mess with each other
>>83531411
Sue had more chemistry with her brother than Reed.
>>83531414
As a guy with a small chinese dick- vaginas are tiny.
Like I can rarely fit three fingers in tiny. Like my little thumb-like peen hits the cervix pretty often tiny.
You aren't not getting laid because of your dick.You're probably not getting laid because the people around you are morons
Also- unless you have a grotesque face- which I kinda doubt because that's not what you initially complained about- girls want to fuck you. Just not the girls you look at from a distance. Sex with pretty girls isn't better than sex with the ugly ones. It's how much you care about a person that makes you cum harder.
Also- sure you could ADD those spices to the character. But it doesn't change that original team dynamic. The best thing to do with the F4 is make them side characters in a Doctor Doom movie. Make a gritty Doctor Doom movie about him taking back Latveria from a genocidal regime and becoming dictator through a military coup. Keep the magic and the robots. A movie about Doom earning all the wealth and power like fuckin Scarface.
>>83531431
Meant to reply to: >>83531211
>>83531576
Like imagine a movie of Doom fleeing a civil war as a kid. Traveling the world, meeting reed, getting scarred, hating reed, training with monks, becoming a wizard, starting a rebellion and ending with him sitting on the throne like this. There are so many ways to do that right that I can't believe that it hasn't happened.
>>83530741
TETSUOOOOOOOOO
>>83531430
Michael does a really good job playing the brash hot shot, surely there's someone he could play that isn't a big waste like this.
>>83531698
A Doom movie would be neat.
>>83531721
KANEDAAA!
>>83531576
I actually do have a grotesque face, no women are interested in me, only gay men.
And no matter what I'm told about dick size I'm not gonna believe it.
It's all "everybody's beautiful and special" bullshit.
>make a gritty Doctor Doom movie about him taking back Latveria from a genocidal regime and becoming dictator through a military coup. Keep the magic and the robots. A movie about Doom earning all the wealth and power like fuckin Scarface.
>Like imagine a movie of Doom fleeing a civil war as a kid. Traveling the world, meeting reed, getting scarred, hating reed, training with monks, becoming a wizard, starting a rebellion and ending with him sitting on the throne like this.
That would be amazing, but I don't know if it's the right thing to do.
I think there might be actual Fantastic Four fans out there that would be upset about the FF being background characters.
Surely there's some way to make the team dynamic work. Do the FF really have anything to offer?
>>83531819
You're not an irredeemable piece of shit anon. Irredeemable pieces of shit are more interesting than the people on 4chan. Go talk to the pudgy girl with the anime/marvel t-shirt.
>F4 fans.
They don't really exist. There are people who will pretend to be outraged about changes, but I don't really think people give a shit.
>>83529796
they don't care as long as they can dangle that carrot in front of marvel
>>83530135
Science knows more about solar flares now.
>>83531738
That page gave me a boner. A boner for the glory that is DOOM.
Is Secret Wars pretty cool?
Is the new Secret Wars cool?
Is Battleworld cool?
>>83532048
This is a thing I think Fan4stic worked out. By making their exploration extra-dimensional in stead of just space. Also I liked the "making super-science in a garage" part of F4.
>>83531984
>Irredeemable pieces of shit are more interesting than the people on 4chan.
What? I thought everybody on 4chan was an irredeemable piece of shit, hence why we're on 4chan.
>Go talk to the pudgy girl with the anime/marvel t-shirt.
I don't talk to girls in real life. Are you insane?
And it's too bad that Fantastic Four doesn't have fans, but that just makes me more interested.
How can we fix it? How can we update the concept? My former friend had some ideas.
He wanted to change Ben from a smoking depressed Jewish guy to a black cop that actually appreciates his change because he can help more people.
>>83532101
Original Secret Wars was pretty cool, yeah.
>>83532101
>This is a thing I think Fan4stic worked out. By making their exploration extra-dimensional in stead of just space.
It was horrible, at least the execution. I'm not a big fan of the idea either though.
I just want a passable Dr Doom that acknowledges his origin story instead of some hollywood bullshit.
Here's what I don't understand.
How does a major studio let the director of a major blockbuster have a drugged up breakdown on set?? Why not let Lyndsay Lohan direct while you're at it? I'd be pissed if I was a News Corp shareholder.
>>83529796
>FF MCU movie set during the 60s, complete with campy retro-future tech and cheesy tongue-in-cheek vintage America in-jokes
Would it work?
>>83532260
I'd pay to go see it.
>>83532260
Maybe the only way it could work, it'd explain why Reed Richards or the FF were never brought up in the MCU thus far.
>>83532236
A combination of too little and too much oversight? They left the project in inexperienced hands, and when they finally checked up on him and realized the shitshow he created, too many people got involved trying to salvage it.
>>83532110
No anon, we're losers. Not the same thing.
>>83532133
I think the other dimensions thing could be used to a lot of interesting stuff.
How about the F4 get trapped in another dimension with mole people?
The thing about attaching an idea like that to their origin means you don't need to explain the strangeness of the bad guys. Technically Space does that too but generally Grey Skinned hoards with pew pew ray guns who don't speak are what come from space.
>>83532236
Trank was an in-demand director who had only one major film to his list (Chronicle), and no one expected this would happen.
Sometimes breakdowns happen on other sets but it's usually a crapshoot and the studio tries to mitigate any possible disasters.
In this case, Trank made it harder for them to do so.
>>83532356
I don't know, for some reason I'm really attached to the space origin.
It's outdated, but I feel like it's core to the Fantastic Four.
I think they tried to modernize the Fantastic Four comics in the 90's and there was this cool thing where when the ship crashed, all of the members ended up in places that represented their powers.
I think Reed might've fallen in a lake, and Ben ended up in Mexico or something. It'd be better if I knew the specifics, but I thought it was really cool.
If you want to completely revamp the Fantastic Four though you could do it like Captain America meets Guardians of the Galaxy.
Four criminals that volunteer for an experiment in order to shorten their prison sentence or get rid of it entirely.
Reed becomes a rogue scientist.
Sue a rowdy super model/Amber Rose type arrested for drinking and driving or something.
Johnny is her famous actor brother. I don't know what his crime would be, date rape is too extreme.
And Ben? I don't know, maybe a construction worker charged with manslaughter.
>>83529796
>2008, The Dark Knight becomes the second coming of christ, raping the box office
>suddenly every studio wants to do Nolan style shit
>Fox not subtly announces in 2009 this is their plan with Fantastic Four
>MCU is only two movies deep at this point with a hint at how big it could be, but still so far away from hitting a billion with each release
>Fox looks at Nolan and says they want a dark reboot with a moderate sized budget thats more grounded than before aka rooted in science
>its 2012 now
>finally found a fresh director with potential that has a slight degree of experience with sci-fi like how Nolan was with the mystery/thriller genre was pre Begins
>all plans are ago
>Avengers comes out and rapes the box office proving Feige was right about everything
>Fox is already in too deep
>Continue on with Trank's pitch which is exactly what they wanted
>realize its not where they should be midway through, especially now that the MCU is proving to not be a fluke given that Iron Man 3 hit a billion, Thor 2 close to 700, Winter Soldier 750 and Literally Whos Of The Galaxy make 800 million respectively in box office alone
>have extensive reshoots that don't even attempt to hide that they're reshoots
>movie comes out and its objectively shit
Does anyone else feel bad for Trank?
I was indifferent to Chronicle, but Fox got exactly what they asked for with this movie. It's not his fault given how these movies are made.
>>83531414
>blaming the outcome of your life on the size of your dick
Play the hand you're dealt my nigga.
>>83532704
No. He was a cockmunch who looked at the source material for two seconds, said "fuck that noise", and shat out an unsalvageable train wreck. Fuck his dumb face.
>>83532533
... That doesn't work at all. Sue Storm's character was never Party Girl.
>>83532781
Fuck you.
>>83532863
That's the only part that doesn't work? What was Sue like originally then?
>>83532866
I'm just saying, men with tiny dicks have lived great lived and men with monster dongs have died with no one to mourn them. Don't give yourself an excuse to fail
>>83532932
You sound like you're trying to make yourself feel better too.
>>83532932
>great lives
Just finished reading Hickman's FF run (my first ever FF reading) and... wow.
It's everything you'd expect from a FF comic:
>Love and family
>Galactus
>Time travel
>Alternate realities
>Inhumans
>Space shenanigans
>Doom
>Galactus
It just put the movies into perspective and how bad they've been. Why can't they get the FF right? They've got all the ingredients for afantasticsci-fi movie.
Also what do I read to fill this FF void in my life? IlovedHickman's FF.
Why do they feel the need to fuck with Doom? He's a perfect villain already. How is making him a CEO or hacker more appealing to Fox? He's a guy that is a dictator who know magic. How is that not great?
>>83532932
Nah, but I am a short guy and I've always applied the same logic there. Nothing I can do to change reality, and whining accomplishes nothing.
There are certainly women that will only fuck tall guys with big dicks, but that's not everyone woman in the world.
Ultimately, accepting failure as a foregone conclusion is a shitty way to live
>>83533006
Stupid Chadlet shut the fuck up
Let us have this Fantastic Four thread in peace
>>83532989
B-because a guy with a name like Doom is silly and he needs to be grounded in reality so people can enjoy it because otherwise it'd be lame, unlike the rest of the movie.
>>83533006
Whoops meant to reply to >>83532950
I'm a little drunk, which is why I'm droppin' n-bombs and getting philisophical
Why did they spend the first third of the movie building the teleporter, then spend the same amount of time building the second one? Maybe if they hadn't wasted thirty minutes doing the exact same sequence again they could have actually developed the characters.
>>83532957
I still hold great fondness for Lee/Kirby. Maybe it's because Kirby will always be king but it's just a bunch of great little stories. Also interesting since nearly everything in the Marvel universe until the 70's somehow was linked with F4. So seeing how it all started is nice.
>>83529796
Wow, I didnt know that this is from Marvel. Instead of DC comics
>>83532957
Is it collected in trades?
I've read 0 F4.
>>83532989
Thats too weird. How is he magic if the F4 are astronauts?
>>83533032
Dictators and drug dealers get called things like "Doctor Doom" all the time. The name can be taken seriously.
>>83533089
>The name can be taken seriously
In case the stutter at the start didn't clue you in, I was being sarcastic.
>I've read 0 F4
HOW?
>>83533104
>HOW?
Fantastic Four is boring as shit, and this is coming from someone that owns the very first issue. Get over your shit series.
>>83533131
Stop being such a negative nancy.
>>83533131
eat an entire ass
you cant make a film about a stretchy man, a fire guy, a woman who makes bubbles and goes invisible and a rock man in 2016 and make it work
ff is a dead concept and outdated
inb4 "you cant make a film about a giant green hulk monster, a man in iron armor, a god, and a super soldier"
those all work, the fantastic four just don't work well on the big screen
>>83533191
Then how come a guy who turns green when he's mad, a guy who can shrink, a guy who dresses up like a bat at night or a blind lawyer who punches people a lot still work?
>>83532704
No. Read up on his behaviour. Dude deserves to get his ass kicked.
>>83533104
It did clue me in actually.
But like I said when I posted about wanting a Dr Doom movie, you can and should make Doom as gritty and grounded as you can. (While still being a science wizard) And make the F4 as bright and colorful as possible. Put Doom in the real world where children get blown up by suicide bombers and Reed in a clean neon cgi mess.
>>83533131
This nigger isn't me.
>>83530702
>and posts on 4chan gossip
wait what?
>>83529927
>modern world
>advancing anything other than social awareness
oh, you want to go to space. too bad abdule jamar rokko in bum fuck india is poor,
>>83532932
I think manlets with micropenis can compensate to some level, but out of them only a few will alleviate the pain.
Being virgin and hated for things you cant control is not that bad, I am 2 and I haven't killed myself despite having a 4 inch dick and being shorter than a 13 year old at 5'4".
>>83533354
He allegedly went on /b/ and talked about the internal strife of the project. Screencaps are somewhere. Worth the read but keep in mind he was out to cover his own ass and pin everything on FOX.
>>83531819
Then just go full gay.
>>83530340
>obvious things like the fact that fantastic four has a tone incompatible with the modern day
Are you trying to say that a film about the importance of family, and sticking together as one is a theme that people today cannot comprehend?
>>83533191
>What is The Incredibles
Fuck off.
>>83529889
>I just can't think of any possible way to do Fantastic Four in modern day
It's literally equal parts The Incredibles and Doctor Who. It should be easy as shit to make, and make in a way that normies love.
I don't understand how they keep fucking it up.
>>83529830
If they ever got the rights back, I don't think they would make movies focused on them.
Only if people somehow liked them in ensemble movies.
>>83535881
F4 can be it's own thing easily. Fox is just fucking moronic and feel the need to change everything about them to somehow "modernize" them. When they are fine the way they were.
>>83529796
At least it's better than the Dragons movies.
>>83535898
Nah, their reputation is completely fucked by now, like videogame movies.
Not a surprise when Marvel tried negotiating, they only wanted Galactus and Silver Surfer.
>>83535881
The dumber parts of the F4 canon would be easier to handle in an established universe though. They could have tried to recreate the Convergence from Thor 2 because scientific curiosity and misfired rather than teleported to another dimension and got superpowers.
>>83529796
*worse
Do you even english?
>>83536002
Fuck off Hitler
>>83529830
>dr doom
>galactus
>annihilus
>kang the conqueror
and to get people hype for the main team they'd just have to introduce them in a different film
>>83529889
>I just can't think of any possible way to do Fantastic Four in modern day
This meme has to die
>>83533158
I would if I could.
>>83533559
Heh. I'm 5'4 too.
>>83535818
MATT SMITH AS REED RICHARDS
>>83529889
That's because you read the reddit post about how they should've come from the 60's, and fail to see that that makes no sense to the characters because they are never outdated from the time they live in. Reed is the foremost scientist. How the fuck would that work with him in stasis for half a century?
Speaking of reddit, FF is easy to do, just use the character template from the 2003 movies but have them do something out of a Rick and Morty episode instead of faffing around and crying pretty.
>>83533559
>and I haven't killed myself despite having a 4 inch dick
I wish guys would understand it's not length that matters but thickness. A guy can have an 8 inch cock but that means nothing if it's as thin as a pencil.
>>83537418
Balance matters, not one or the other.
>you now remember "people" flipping their shit at the Human Torch being black
it didn't matter in the end, everyone in the movie was bland as fuck
>>83538724
Fuck he was probably the most charismatic out of all of them.
I mean, I know it's like trying to argue which fart stank the least, but hey.
>>83531211
>Johnny makes a really mean joke about the thing during the final scene 'cause that's what he does
>Ben and Johnny barely talked to each other thorough the movie
The FF are supposed to be a family over a hero team. This movie felt like they had thrown a bunch of strangers and called it an ensemble.
>>83529796
God the final scene.
"What did you say?"
"I said its fantastic."
Criiiiiiiiiinge. So badly done.
And earlier with Jonny saying "say yes." Like they had any fucking leverage. Like anything about their situation had changed that much. You beat up the worst villain adaptation in history. Well done.
Apart from that you lost the one person with any power who was trying to protect you. Your situation with the military hasn't changed really. Except now when you demand shit they say "ok den."
"What did you say???"
Ugh.
So is the movie "so bad it's kind of weirdly funny" or bad in a way that not even alcohol can help it?
>>83534904
>/b/
It was /tv/, how hard is it to know boards? Goddamn
>>83532260
>FF in the 60s
I've been seeing this idea since I used to post on Superhero Hype in the early 2000s.
This shit needs to stop.
>>83539760
It's not a Catwoman "How the fuck did this happen?" kind of bad. It's a Hobbit trilogy "I know exactly why this happened and that's sad" kind of bad.
>>83539835
Who the fuck cares?
>>83540182
Never watched the Hobbit. Once they said they were turning it into 3 movies I threw up my hands and didn't even bother hearing about any of it. I might have been alright with 2 because there's a lot you can do with all the empty space between scenes in the book but no way 3 would work.
So just skip it and forget it exists?
>>83540278
I watched and tried to extract humour from it.
I failed. It sucks in such a boring way. There are cool ideas in there, but overall it's just the most boring kind of shit.
>>83540278
There are fan recuts that are decent. The There And Back Again cut of the first movie is pretty good, but I don't know any specific names for the other two. If you really wanted to see the Hobbit in live action you could do a lot worse, but otherwise I'd say just stick to the Rankin & Bass version.
>>83540363
>cool ideas
Let me list all of them
>Getting superpowers might hurt and be scary
>Superheros as a military strike force
That's it, you've seen Fan4stic.
>>83542150
There is a cut that makes all three movies into 1 four hour movie. Its fine then. But the giant magic dragon killing crossbow totally misses the fucking point of how Smaug dies in the book. Theres no way to fix that.
>>83542187
I need to remind everyone that Thorin uses a wheelbarrow to surf on a river of molten gold.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTUotNjhYeI
>>83542187
Oh for sure. There are a lot of problems with the trilogy that simple editing can't fix. I just think it's a testament to how important good editing is that so much can be improved at all.
>>83542298
In the first movie- there is a scene where Balin tells a story at the campfire. About Thorin fighting Azog. I had so much hope for the trilogy at that point. I was thinking "Oh shit this is how they pad out the run time! The Dwarfs are going to take turns telling stories from Tolkiens other books! That's fucking brilliant." That didn't happen and I'm super sad.
Picture unrelated I just think that there's nothing left to be said for F4 or the Hobbit.
Maybe the F4 should just stay in space for a whole movie.
>>83542509
Is that Vladamir Putin with horns?
>>83542549
It's Hannibal Lecter with Antlers.
I like to recommend NBCs Hannibal as often as I can. It gets so good.
>>83532704
Trank was a messed up douchebag during Chronicle was well.
>>83536496
REED RICHARDS
So are Sue's force fields invisible too
>>83542716
What happened there?
>>83529796
>Fox didn't try at all.
Actually they did. They were running damage control months before the movie came out. Then after it came out that they reversed position and blamed it on the studio.
>>83543999
???
>>83536496
HAYDEN CHRISTENSON AS DOCTOR DOOM
>>83529796
Would you guys prefer it if Kate Mara wore this instead?
>>83546584
oh fuck off
>>83529796
>This is so much worst
Worse. It's "WORSE" than you though.
