>>81286632
Sounds like a job for Jack Chick!
I like Christian Archie over PC, anti-gun Archie or edgy CW Archie.
>>81286800
Hi there!
>>81286632
I actually found a copy of this for $5 the other day. Took a look inside out of curiosity, and I gotta admit, the art was pretty and I kind of wish I'd gotten it just for the novelty. Has anyone read it?
![51LG5aXsAPL._SX339_BO1,204,203,200_[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/BPI75cD.jpg "51LG5aXsAPL._SX339_BO1,204,203,200_[1].jpg")
>>81286632
Are there any scans of this book? I got it from the the local mission, and I thought I might storytime it.
>>81287101
I haven't, but just based on that "Christian Book Award" I can tell you it's good. They gave it that because it doesn't pull any punches or skip over the good shit like they do at Sunday Mass. The Bible is fucking brutal.
My favorite story is always the one where Elijah challenges the priests of Baal to call down fire from their god. They build a bonfire and pray to it, and nothing happens. Then Elijah builds a bonfire with green wood, pours water on it, then prays and the whole thing goes up in a blaze.
THEN HE LEADS THE 300 PRIESTS OF BAAL DOWN TO THE RIVER
AND SLITS THEIR THROATS ONE BY ONE
I'm Catholic in recovery but our mythology is fucking sweet.
>>81286800
Has anyone the real comics? Not just the tracts?
>>81286632
This is great. This Hindu (?!) talks weirdly to the audience. For him his culture wouldn't be strange or contradictory.
It's like a christian character pointing out that he belives that God let his son (also him but not really)getting killed to forgive us for some disobedience of our ancestors who didn't know any better.
Reggie looks like he doesn't even want to be here.
The fuck is big ethel doing up on the stage? She doesn't even have an instrument.
>christian comics
They're shit because modern christianity is a faggy joke that cuts out all the parts about not being a pussy and just preaches peace and love bullshit
>>81290901
>who didn't know any better
God specifically told them not to eat from the tree
>>81291310
This is the exact thing you guys all got mad at Jack Chick for writing about anon. None of you wanted to bare witness to the horror of Satan
Muslins in propaganda always makes me laugh my ass off
>>81291332
You can discern whether or not someone has actually attempted to read the Bible or not from their understand of what happened in the Garden of Eden. It's strange, even though it's written very clearly, most people struggle to understand that Satan promised Eve that she would be able to make herself and Adam like Elohim if she ate the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. It wasn't some innocuous act, Eve was trying to usurp God and take power in the Garden for herself
>>81286632
Exists a Bibleman comic?
It was Easter.
Where's my Serenity???
>>81291531
It got storytimed a couple of days ago.
>>81291014
This was back when Archie actually knew how to keep track of their contracts.
>>81291034
From the ones I've seen, Big Ethel was a pretty big part of the Spire Comics. I just because she wasn't as trampy as Veronica or Betty; sure, they tried with the latter but her defining characteristic was her thirst for Archie.
>>81291648
>>81291657
Spoiled for unpasteurized dairy products.
>>81291670
Or not lol
>>81291679
I love this like a son
>>81291365
Took me a while to see the nloody hands. So is this a comic that warns us about Astrology and how it's satanic in nature?
>>81291613
That guy in the back has definitely seem "flamboyant fossie"
>>81291448
that art is fucking terrible what is it from lol
>>81290692
it was pretty sweet until jesus came in and fagged it up with all that love and forgiveness shit
>>81292849
Man, I only ever like this panel because of the blonde in the red dress. The things I'd do to her.
>>81291648
>that lady at bottom left
>>81286632
>>81291448
Wow I didn't know Frank Miller was still drawing christian comics
>>81291648
NEW METAL IS NOT FUCKING METAL GODAMMIT IT'S JUST A HEAVIER VERSION OF TEEN AGNST
>>81292899
>>81292849
>The GREAT SNATCH!!!
ffs christianity you're not even trying to hide your damned psychosexual hangups here
>>81293869
No you moron, they're not talking about "new metal", they're literally referring to Heavy Metal as a new genre of music because that's when the comic is taking place
>>81294276
But if it's a new genre then how did the Bible know that they were hurting everyone?
>>81294298
The bible always knows
>>81294298
if its new its hurting people.
>>81291613
Betty has been mislead by the Harlot, Veronica
>>81287101
I personally like pic related better.
It came out in 1978 so it really didn't pull any punches.
>>81294571
Moses always looks like he's about to throw the commandments on the ground really hard
>>81294365
Just look at what it did to that poor kids baseball bat >>81291648
Archie in the Old West
>>81294542
Ronnie looks unusually vulnerable and cute in panel 3.
>>81294598
But oh no, trouble!
>>81294598
Do you know how popular ice cold milkshakes would have been in the hot as balls Old West?
>>81294612
Its the threat of the demon specter, evolution!
>>81294587
To be fair, that's what he was doing, when he saw the Israelites worshipping the golden calf.
Then he turned it into powder and made them drink it. Good times.
>>81294571
I kind of want to get a copy of pic related, though. I've flipped through it and it's pretty great, as is the story behind it
>Crumb wants to make a Bible parody with his typical sex and violence
>Reads through all of Genesis
>Realizes he can't outdo the original
>Just does a straight adaptation instead
>>81294635
*tips ten gallon hat*
>>81294643
Posting some more from Genesis
>>81294741
>mfw the Serpent is Pepe
>>81294756
MEME
MAGIC
>>81286632
Christianity has the most drably dressed deities out of all the popular religions. It's just robes and gross sandals.
>>81294612
>pronto
>not head of jug
Come on son,
>>81291531
Last Sunday.
>>81291490
Ugh race mixing promoted even in bible shows. And of course a black man with white woman. Ugh I hate this world
>>81294756
>Adam looks like a post-menopausal Eve
>>81291449
I thought being "like him" just meant she'd be smart and cool generally awesome, the same way a child might want to be like their parent.
>>81290692
>My favorite story is always the one where Elijah challenges the priests of Baal to call down fire from their god. They build a bonfire and pray to it, and nothing happens. Then Elijah builds a bonfire with green wood, pours water on it, then prays and the whole thing goes up in a blaze.
>THEN HE LEADS THE 300 PRIESTS OF BAAL DOWN TO THE RIVER
>AND SLITS THEIR THROATS ONE BY ONE
I run a homebrew D&D setting based largely on the Old Testament and ancient world.
It largely consists of players going from place to place saying, "Our gods/empire are better than yours" and kicking ass and taking names of local spirits/gods/leaders and then taking their shit to prove it.
>>81294756
Bump
>>81294712
>But never X-rated!!!
No matter how hard she tries.
