Make the movie worse
Swap the actors
>>81285520
Cast Christian Bale as Batman.
>>81285520
Lex screams all his lines.
Change Superman's mom's name to anything other than Martha.
>>81285520
All those dream sequuences reportedly cut?
Throw 'em back in.
Anywhere you damn well please.
>>81285520
Add quips and Whedonisms
Film it like it's a TV show
Make the fights not have any sense of danger
lois lane befriends felicity
>>81285520
>Batman kills!
>Superman dies!
>No development or establishing shots; shit is a close-up play!
>DOOMSDAY GUISE...not rly tho
>EXPLODEXPLOEDETONATEINSPACEJESUSJESUSJEESUS!
>J-JEEZ...US!
>Lex!
Oh.
. . .
.
Tommy Wiseau as Luthor Sr
>Doomsday and Superman take the fight back to the Kryptonian ship
>Doomsday and Superman both die like they did in the movie
>The Kryptonian ship fuses their DNA
>Out comes Henry Cavill wearing Dawn of the Dead-tier makeup
>"Me am no Bizarro!!"
>Another 20 minute fight scene
>Meanwhile Luthor builds a portal to the Phantom Zone
>Lex sends Bizarro there (where Bizarro finds a cube planet to call home) and is regarded as a hero
batman kills superman or vice versa
Make it neverending.
>>81285779
I said "worse," not better!
Was gonna say "add Hal" but really that would just make it consistent.
Batman and Superman are cgi motion capture
Swap Ben Affleck for Channing Tatum, but make sure the only person who is on the screen is Jesse Eisenberg.
>>81285520
>Make the movie worse
Make people pay to see it.
>>81285779
>"Oh hello Supermans."
Put Russel Crowe in all the scenes with Lex on the ship.
>>81285520
Take out wonder woman. That's it.
>>81285520
Man look at the contrast in that picture.
One's dark. The other, slightly less dark.
>>81285796
Holy Shit, that would have been great.
>>81285520
less alfred.
More flashbacks to sociopath dad kevin costner.
>Take out the Superman saving people scenes and replace them with Clark investigating Bruce Wayne and using his super abilities to spy on him. All the while growing to hate his methods even more.
>More Diana Prince talking to people in scenes that require her to convey emotions other than attraction or flirting.
>Cut Alfred out as much as possible, just nothing but what's absolutely necessary to drive the story forward.
>More Batman dream sequences but they're of Superman fucking all Batmans love interests while he's still chained up. And Superman laughs and refuses to break eye contact while he does it. Maybe have some of those guards holding his head still, forcing him to watch.
>Lex has chronic asthma so almost every time he has a big speech he has to stop periodically to take hit of his inhaler.
>>81285520
Make it 3 hours and R-rated.
>>81287333
>This
I understood this. Here is your acknowledgement.
>>81285941
The absolute worst thing is, I legitimately enjoyed GL for what it was.
This... Was just a cinematic mate term abortion
We get Seth Macfarlane to play Plastic Man, he swoops in right after Wonder Woman and turns into a bicycle. Batman rides Plastic Man to Felicity's house and ask her to hack Doomsday
>>81285520
>the R-rated director's cut will have an addition 30 minutes of random dream sequences and terrible ads for movies that will probably never be made
>it costs $50
>preorders are non-refundable
>the slipcase sprays indelible ink in the shape of the BvS logo when you open it for the first time
>the ink is made with skunk musk
>the director's commentary is just Snyder and Affleck having a whiny bitch fight about whose fault it is that the movie turned out this way
>Snyder walks out halfway through and the rest is just Affleck sobbing about how his marriage was destroyed by this movie because Jennifer told him from the start it was a bust and he needed to be more realistic about his career
>at the end of the commentary having said nothing the entire time Amy Adams coughs politely and says she's just going to go now
>>81286117
>Jesse Eisenberg declines to come back for the sequel so they reshoot all his scenes with the new actor for consistency
>it's Michael Cera
>>81285520
Ask Kevin Smith to write it
>>81288148
Calm the fuck down there, Satan.
>>81285520
Listen to any of the ideas posted above
>>81288119
I would totally risk the Skunk musk to hear that commentary.
>>81286757
>>Lex has chronic asthma so almost every time he has a big speech he has to stop periodically to take hit of his inhaler.
Kek
Tell the editor he needs to edit more thingsreal talk though I don't think I've ever seen and editor this bad before
>>81285520
Lex pees on Superman's mom.
>>81288191
You're cheating.
>>81285614
>anywhere you damn well please
So the same way the ones already there are thrown in?
>>81285547
>>81285535
>>81285626
>>81285779
>>81287816
ya niggas don't know what the word worse means
>>81285520
Give the movie an environmental message.
>>81286757
look at this asshole giving snyder all these ideas.
The JL movie is fucked.
didnt thay say the movie was going to smart for regular people
>>81286757
>Superman saving people scenes
>scenes
There was one. And it was a montage, during which Superman was somber and unsure of himself. And Batman was scowling over it about how much the dude sucks if I recall. The only other times he saved anyone in the entire movie were Lois and, of course, Luthor.
"It's a Superman movie about how the world hates Superman, and Superman only uses his powers to look scary and punch things!"
>>81285520
Batman fights Superman and it reuses footage from the Superman vs Zod fight in Man of Steel.
Then Batman finds out that Superman's mom is named Martha, screams "OH MY GOD, I'M SORRY BRO, NO MORE MARTHAS WILL DIE TONIGHT" and goes to save her.
Then they team up to stop Luthor but then Luthor fights them like he's got super strength. Then when he uses heat vision, they find out that Luthor is actually Kryptonian.
And then Luthor tells them that not only is he Kryptonian, Kryptonians are descendents of the Asgardians.
Then Luthor reveals that he has Mjolnir (the DC universe version), and lifts it, transforming himself into Lu-Thor and brings Doomsday aka Ragnarok to life with his magic lightning and Kryptonian tech.
Wonder Woman arrives summoning the power of the Gods to resurrect the golem S.H.A.Z.A.M. to help Superman fight Doomsday and Lu-Thor.
>>81285520
no Wonder Woman
>>81290657
the worst part was that fucking tease of a smile when he walked in on Lois in the tub
>>81290836
>Lu-Thor
Any shit I had, is now lost.
>>81290836
WEW
Superman uses the spirit bomb to destroy the Earth, but is stopped by Batman's lust for little button puss' flesh cock, which they both lustfully rip off. They then send the robot dog to IGN for further product analysis and walk off into the sunset.
I may have made it better, actually.
>Luthor steals Zod's body to create a monster
>instead of Doomsday, it's aThanagarian Snare Beast.
>>81285779
What a story, Clark.
Just paste this in, doesn't matter where. Call it the extended edition.
Most of you guys suck at this. You can't add something that will make the movie more bizarre, but also more entertaining. You have to add something abysmal to watch.
>add a CGI mascot animal used for slapstick
>>81291125
Krypto?
Myxpltkz?
Bat-Mite?
Lex?
>>81290836
Doomsday sex scene.
>>81291248
Depends on who he does sex to.
>>81291285
Everyone present with realistic results.
>>81291288
He makes sweet, tender love to them all night long?
>>81291165
>Bat-Mite
I keep saying the only fix the movie needs is it should have been Batman Zurr En Arrh
>>81291307
More like "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" except now it's "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex, Woman of Bronze, Man of Leather, and Monster of Diamond Nanotubes"
>>81291113
I know this is a joke about how cinema gets dumber in the future, but Andy Warhol literally did this in 1960-something
Add more Amy Adams
>>81285520
Batman is the one who collects jars of piss
The rumors of Wonder Woman being a female Kryptonian are true
Lex creates Darkseid instead of Doomsday
>>81291324
>Batman movie shows Batman years before the Zod fight, tracking down rumors of an unkillable man with super strength
>his growing cynicism is tempered by the hope he has that he can find this man and they can fix the world
>Zod fight is the moment when he realizes he can't trust even Superman
>Bat-Mite appears to help him cope with his protracted crisis of faith
>>81285520
add three more hours of Superman looking broody (constipated) at Metropolis
>>81286757
>And Superman laughs and refuses to break eye contact while he does it.
10/10
>>81291452
>it's an Amy Adams porno
>just a blowbang
>she's high as shit
>>81291452
Even though the writers fumble around to find her something to do, I really do think she's hot. It was always a delight to watch her on screen and listen to literally nothing coming out of her mouth.
>>81285796
Ok. I liked BvS.
But submit this thing as an elseworlds NOW!
>>81288164
>TRUE ... because
>Kevin Smith writing his name makes it horrific.
>>81290836
>Lu-Thor
AquaSOME!
>>81285738
There are plenty of establishing shots and it is not mostly close ups, youre just parroting half in the fag you retard.
>>81290836
>scrawny eisenberg beating up Affleck and Cavill
Yes. This is funny to me.
>>81290836
>>81285520
add Aquaman, Flash and Cyborg into the mix
oh wait.
>>81285779
"What are you gonna do about it supes? Are you a chicken?! Cheep cheerp cheer"
>>81285520
Get Joss Whedon involved somehow.
>>81285520
TWO SUPERMEN VS TWO BATMEN
put trailers for the justice league in the movie
>>81285520
>Directed by Joss Whedon
>Starring Sean Penn
>Special guest appearance by funny man Rob Schneider
>Screenplay by the guys who brought you amazing Spider-man 2
Give Lex a sassy black gay robot sidekick voiced by Kevin Hart
Doomsday is a giant spider
Batman fights a polar bear when he tracks down the fortress of solitude
Superman gets rid of his cape and colourful suit, because it's too faggy
Directed by Zack Sny- oh.
Written by Goye- oh.
>>81290447
The only thing that could've made that scene good.
>>81285520
Make another dream sequence where Pa Kent tells Clark how he burnt puppy farms.
>>81285520
Its now a light fun action comedy full of quips.
>Batman, you went crazy! Im not your MobyDick!
>I can agree on the moby part!
It has forgettable and boring ost.
It ends with a post credits sequence.
>>81285520
Still haven't bothered to see it.
Still if I were to make it bad, (or worse);
Make all Zod/DD sequences a dream, make the appearance of other heroes a dream, have everything that was in the commercial a dream.
Bulk of the movie is Bruce Wayne in a court-room representing people who were affected by MoS-Day. It would explain why Luthor was the Joker, it would explain why Batman was killing EVERYONE, it would ALSO explain why Superman wasn't very super (or heroic) because it was all Batfleck's internal feelings about Superman. Maybe it's years after the Nolanverse, and Batman has just been so exposed to the FEAR-TOXIN that he slips in and out of crazy fucking dreams (like the dude from Scrubs). There should also be scenes where he's lusting over the bailiff who he fantasizes is a dominatrix (and also Wonder Woman), the Jury is most of the b-level heroes of the JL.
4 hour courtroom drama.
>>81285520
>Make the movie worse
Bribe, Soil and Threaten reviewers using a well funded marketing team made of the best marketers both on fields such as media using journal, web and tv in such a way Donald Draper himself would shrug. All of this, of course, covertly financed by Disney to mud the movie in any way, by any means.
Then, buy it from Warner Brothers.
>>81285520
Superman goes full plutonian, John Corben was a criminal that was injured on the battle of metropolis and Lex Luthor makes him Metallo, but John instead of being evil uses his new body to protect humanity from the alien called Kal-El. Batman is there to help with stopping Superman destruction, and he helps Corben (who is powered by kryptonite) to fight Kal-El. There's even a scene where Superman snaps the neck of John, and he just spins it like the exorcist and says- Your father drowns horses on hell
Diana is really a kryptonian andSuperman's sister
>>81290836
>Asgardians.
>Then Luthor reveals that he has Mjolnir
what the fuck
I was expecting StarGate tie-in
>descendants of the Asgardians
>suddenly he jumps off a building straight into a stargate
>Spermaman and Buttman have to team up with SG1 under the lead of general Hammond and stop Luthor who has joined forces with Ra and other false gods
>in the process Batman is infused with a goauld so that he can now use all the crazy magical stuff and doesn't just have to STAND AROUND DOING NOTHING DURING THE FUCKING FIGHTS
>then the final battle happens, during which the Ori come and start attacking both sides
>they have to team up in order to kick their butt
>while almost dying, Aslan comes, roars, dies, does absolutely nothing, but Ori are so mindfucked and what-the-fuck-has-just-happened that Teal'c just fucking destroys them by shooting them in the head
>O'Neil then makes a joke to which Teal'c stoically replies 'Indeed'
>credits rollI loved the movie, though. I don't read comics. Just saw this thread on the 4chan frontpage.Avengers and all the Marvel movies I've seen (Ironman 1, Transformers 1 (is that even Marvel?) were shit.but I enjoyed Watchmen, 300, quite enjoyed Man of Steel although it left something to be desiredSnyder is good
Give Lois more to do
>>81288119
Now that's a commentary I'd actually listen to
>>81285520
He plays Lex Luthor. And Batman. And Superman.
And Wonder Woman.
>>81297734
>that dirty nose
wht the fuck
is basic hygiene a foreign term to him?
>Everything is exactly the same
>Except instead if the inceptining floating dirt ending, we see Lois and Wonder Woman talk for the first time
>They slowly inch toward one another
>it cuts to black just before they kiss
>>81297835
>>81285520
Pander to the critics
Marvel logo.
>>81297070
>it has a forgettable and boring ost
but it already has that
>>81297542
>>81297542
>I don't read comics
>I loved Watchmen
that'll do it
>>81297967
Mad DCuck detected
>>81285520
make batman like in the joel schumacher movies
>>81298151
Clooney wasn't a bad Batman, he was just IN a bad Batman movie.
Superman vs Batman the musical. Before Batman kills Superman, Superman points to the statue of liberty who now looks like Martha Wayne.
"oh my god! I was wrong! It was Marth, all-a-long! Looks like you finally made a monkey out of me!!!!"
>>81298859
worse, not better
>>81298859
>Looks like you finally made a monkey-
Yes we finally made a monkey!
>>81285520
Animu based movies would be an awesome change of air. Imagine Berserk as an HBO series.
>Have Military support for no reason
>Superman doesn't fly
>Bat Mite is in it as well as Apache Chief, El Dorado, and Samurai
>Random strobe lights everywhere during action scenes
>They all fight a giant spider in the third act instead of Doomsday
any of you guys have the cameos of aquaman etc?
>>81299224
A giant spider would be better than Doomsday. You should have gone with ants.
