>Mr. Wayne, I'm IRS. We have heard of some undeclared valuables in your basement. Do you bother if I take a look...
What happens next?
Tell me about Wayne!
Why does he avoid the tax?
>>78160783
If I sell that off would you die?
>>78160720
Why would a French bailiff be working for the IRS in Gotham?
This plot has more holes than Man of Steel.
>>78160960Because that's the only picture I could find
>>78160720
I doubt the IRS would be able to just walk in and talk to Bruce. Alfred would block them pretty quick and tell them to consult the Wayne lawyer (or legal team).
That would buy enough time to empty out anything that might be incriminating in the manor. It's unlikely they would actually find any entrances to the cave.
Surely Wayne Manor has an actual basement that's not connected to the batcave? What would there be to worry about?
>>78160720
Bruce Wayne: "Ok sure, there isn't anything down there and I'll show you myself."
The Wayne manor basement wouldn't have anything unusual in it. The entrances to the cave are all well hidden and wouldn't be found by a normal IRS audit officer.
>Hm...this grandfather clock seems odd.
>>78160720
Bruce then leads them to the basement, where there is nothing unusual, as the entrance to the Batcave is in the main house.
>If you take a step further, I'll have to call my agent's
Mr. IRS
>>78160720
>>78160783
>>78160841
The manor basement would be your average basement, nothing special. The cave is an entirely separate thing that is hidden.
The better question is how did Wayne keep the thing secret during construction? Builders would probably think the cave as a really big panic room. (which in the real world is actually a big thing atm) However, once you start getting into the really high end stuff that is in there, you start to bend believable story bounds.
>>78161162
>What about this bust of William Shakespeare?
>>78161208
Yeah, it's an old house, and the passageway to the batcave is something Bruce had constructed himself, by a team of undocumented workers who he then murdered and dropped in the river afterwards. Presumably the generations of Waynes who lived there before him would have had a mundane basement which long predated the inclusion of the batcave.
>>78161273
The current explanation is that Bruce had special contractors flown in from all over the world, sign big time NDA's, and be blindfolded on the way to the work-site. (all the while being told they were working on a special survival bunker and/or enhanced panic room.)
This isn't actually that strange either. Big top secret federal construction projects actually have similar requirements and some of the above requirements are pretty common.
>>78161273
I like to suspect Wayne has a team of quiet associates who help out with this type of stuff, take his money and keep their mouth shut.
>>78161273
As a contractor I wonder about the construction of the Batcave a lot, though I'm not much of a capefag.
Do any other superheroes have a hideout that would be hard to construct in secret.
>>78161375
Sauce on Bruce hiring contractors? Not disbelieving, just that all this time I'd handwaved it to Harold doing all the lifting since he's the one with the most free time to do it.
>>78161405
>>78161375
I'd like to think too that maybe he makes friends along the way. Hey, Batman saved some construction workers daughters from being kidnapped and eaten by Killer Croc? Well maybe that construction and his crew just happen to have some extra equipment and man power to help "a friend' with a special project.
Stuff like that. Batman basically builds good karma with the Gotham community and they secretly help him out.
>>78161462
Wasn't that the animated show's explanation for the batmobile?
>>78161446
>Do any other superheroes have a hideout that would be hard to construct in secret.
The X-Men's mansion, right at the beginning; it too was a family home belonging to Xavier which he had a secret base built in the underground portion of, before he had any mutant students to work with.
One presumes he used his telepathy to wipe the minds of any contractors after they were done, or at least adjust their memories so that they believed their paycheques were for some more mundane labour.
>>78161276
>"What about it? "
>>78161111
An audit officer can find ANYTHING
>>78161462
That's how they explain the Batmobile in BTAS. So I'd buy it explaining the batcave and other stuff.
>>78161446
It's in one of the recent DC encyclopedias entries.
Most of the REALLY special stuff in the Batcave could probably have been installed by Bruce himself with enough time.
Encourage everyone curious about safe rooms to read this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Safe_room
>>78160720
He would become the IRSman
>>78161540
Yeah, the x-mansion, especially the upgraded shiar tech version, would raise more red flags than even the batcave.
The danger room alone would need huge amounts of power. (especially for all those hologram generators)
>>78161062
If it reaches the stage where they feel they have to visit the manor and inspect it, they'll have warrants and police or federal backup. Alfred will last precisely the time it takes for the taser to make him shit himself to delay hundreds of people who know exactly what they want to achieve.
>>78161101
They'd probably have looked at his fuel consumption on-site, the strange disappearances of equipment - including weapon - and funds from his companies, and they might well have knowledge of a large underground complex at the site - especially if it's a very old site with lots of public records about it. They'd also quite likely have two or three guys like that one in TDK who wanted to africanamericanmail Luscious Freedman who would already have given sworn depositions along with supporting evidence for their claims.
Remember, we're not dealing with a hypothetical situation in which Batman has successfully hidden his activity from the federal authorities. We're dealing with a situation in which he has catastrophically failed.
The FAA are probably sending someone on this raid too, since he's been operating an unlicensed aircraft with no transponder in the Gotham area.
>>78161208
They wouldn't ask him for a tour. He'd be under arrest or ordered to remain away from the house and grounds while the search was carried out. Again, we're talking hundreds of people, sniffer dogs, bomb disposal experts, people who probably think they're hunting for the victims of a serial killer or the stash of a particularly stupid drug baron. They will have radar and infra-red sweeps of the grounds; they will find all the secret spaces of the house. They will tear up floors and push through walls until they find his secrets, and it will take them days at the longest.
OP's question wasn't "how does Batman houdini his way out of this little pickle" it was "what happens next". What happens next is Batman starts getting letters from Mike Milken and Robert Durst.
>>78161805
It's possible that all that stuff is powered by shit running off the grid.
>>78161944
Maybe they just have a mutant that sustains fusion or something as their generator.
>>78161823
>Mike Milken and Robert Durst
Litterally who
>>78161823
You assume that Bruce wouldn't have cleared out anything incriminating and that a warrant would be issued.
I think you underestimate the legal resources Bruce Wayne has access to.
>>78162117
Billionaires who've been to prison.
>>78162119
He wouldn't have known they were coming, and the warrant is a fact of this discussion. The IRS guy would not come out if it weren't.
He can have his lawyers attempt to petition a judge to place a stay on the warrant, but they can't interfere with its execution and it will take a minimum of hours to get anything done at the court.
>>78161823
but you forget
>preptime
>>78160720
>>78160783
>>78160841
damn you
>>78160720
IRS doesn't catch normal mundane rich people hoarding wealth or buy insane things tax free... what makes you think they will figure Batman out?
>>78161276
>Bruce leaves the room
>The red phone starts ringing
>>78162223
Yeah we could just have another Batgod story. Fun.
>>78161506
Yes
>>78160783
You're a rich guy
>>78162371I wish
bruce takes him down to his 'other' basement full of Cuban cigars, recreational drugs and Nazi memorabilia.
>as you can see, I'd rather these sorts of purchases stay off the record *takes out check book* I'm sure we can come to an understanding.
tax man walks away with a million dollars and curiosity satisfied.
The secret of keeping something hidden is to hide something else but make it easier to find. People generally stop snooping when they find your gay porn stash and never end up finding your REALLY gay porn stash.
>>78160783
>>78161375
Also, I believe a lot of cave's power supply comes from a small hydro-electric waterfall damn built into several of the water passages in the cave. So Bruce is able to keep most of the Cave power needs off the grid.
The IRS got fucked by fucking scientologists, they won't get shit on Bats
>Hi IRS, I'm dad.
>>78160720
Even if they somehow found the entrance to the batcave, Bane took everything. There's nothing to audit.
>>78162453
Not sure if the hydro-electric generator is still canon. I do know that right now Batman is leeching off of power from Wayne Industries buildings and distributing that power both to his stuff and to the city.
Wacky sitcom shenanigans as Bruce tries to keep the guy from seeing anything weird, even while Riddler decides to attack Wayne Enterprises.
>>78162508
So Bane was the bailiff in the end?
What if they brought the big guns to audit him?
>>78162638
I do want to see more of Brucie, how he keeps people from finding shit out, and how he helps people without punching them in the face.
Would Private Investigator Jessica Jones figure it out?
>>78161823
>If it reaches the stage where they feel they have to visit the manor and inspect it, they'll have warrants and police or federal backup. Alfred will last precisely the time it takes for the taser to make him shit himself to delay hundreds of people who know exactly what they want to achieve.
You must know some..interesting auditors.
>>78162638
>How do you call this one?...so one B-A-T-M-O-B-I-L-E...are you aware that this wheel size is unauthorized in urban areas?...Ah, you but don't have a license? Interesting, really interesting...let's see, fuel consumption mh-mh, emergency furniture mh-mh. Weapons, really? Missiles? That's even more interesting...
>>78162459
Bats isnt a scam masquaraiding as a church.
>>78162800
Uh... uh... someone... left that in here?
Ye Gods! Someone snuck into the building and left a car full of weapons here for us to find it! What kind of fiend would do this?
>>78162691
He used to play college football.
>>78162838
Yeah, hes richer and smarter
>>78160720
>secret funds for mysterious habits
>lying to investors and company officials about company budgets
>living extravagant lifestyles at the expense of his consumers instead of putting the money back into improving Gotham
Why is Bruce Wayne not in prison?
>>78162871
Those are either not what he does, or not illegal.
>>78162871
Lucius covers for him.
>>78162871
Is any of that canon?
>>78162895
Lying to investors is definitely illegal.
>>78162871
>instead of putting the money back into improving Gotham
But he does do that to the point where it's absolutely comical.
>>78162941
Yea, but doesn't he funds his stuff through his own money.
>>78162963
His own money comes from his company though.
>>78161607
>Criminals are a superstitious cowardly lot. So my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. I must be a creature that every man fears...
>>78162854
>So, your..."halloween costume", is made out of kevlar and actually has functional blades included...why that mr. Wayne?
Bruce donated a lot of money to political campaigns so they'd never go after him.
>>78163006
Uhhhhhh....
I'm... creating a new horror villain. Psycho... Kevlar Man?
>then he sees the Riddler outside the window and draws the blinds real quick before the IRS guy turns around
>>78163006
He's into the LARP scene
>>78163026
>Mr.Wayne we have serious concerns with all of this bladed batmemorabillia
>>78163047
He could just tell them that he's decided he's gonna cash in on the Batman's likeness and that the IRS just stumbled onto the first wave of his Batman toyline.
>>78163047
I don't see you busting down the door of every nerd with a million pieces of Elm Street memorabilia. Huh? Huh?
Yeah.
Think about that.
>>78162983
Yes it's his keep. Do you think all these millionaire ceos are just coincidentally millionaires?
>>78160720
The only worse thing that could happen is Alfred joining a union
>>78162387
Ah yes, the honeypot trick. I use to use that to hide hentai and make anyone that found the fake 3DPD porn folder think I was into real girls.
>>78162173
>Batman
>Wouldn't know they were coming
>>78161823
Batman has a suit that can hide him from supermans vision, you really think the IRA will be a problem?
Also bribes
>>78162387
I had a similar idea but it only went as far as "false basement"
>>78163131
True, but Alfred wouldn't ever care to.
>>78163189
The IRS has a lot of evil tricks.
>>78163071
>Once the audit is over
Mr. Wayne before leaving I'd like to give you a personal advice. Honestly you should try seeking assistance from my psychanalyst, all this bat-obsession is not doing well to your mental health
Bruce Wayne is a white billionaire. The moment anyone in Washington even acquires the thought of auditing him he would receive a polite call notifying him about it.
All of the high profile cases of rich people going to jail? They've been under investigation/suspicion for YEARS. And being a super hero Bruce Wayne would have it swept under the carpet in days.
>>78163189
The IRS might as well be the LoA
>>78161823
>The IRS and the police ransack Bruce Wayne's house, tearing up floorboards, knocking down walls destroying who knows how many valuables and family heirlooms in the process
>Come up with nothing because Batman isn't a fucking idiot that leaves blatant evidence of his Batmanning around the manor
>The city now owes Bruce Wayne tens, if not hundreds of millions in damages to his home, on top of the ten million more he can get for emotional suffering and destruction of priceless family heirlooms, and the fucking medical bill for putting Alfred in the hospital, while getting the cop that did it put in jail for assault
>You've just single-handedly bankrupted an entire city on a wild goose chase
Good job, you fucking maroon, hope you like getting raped by Killer Croc when they throw you in Blackgate.
>>78163287
>slams the door
Pfft, what does HE know?
Hey Alfred, I'm gonna dress up like a winged rodent and punch people in the face!
>Don't use any public bathrooms!
Got it!
>>78163189
>IRS
>not worse than every Batman villain combined
Batman wouldn't know what hit him
>>78162173
>Billionaires who've been to prison.
Yes for racketering and murder.
>>78163347
>You've just single-handedly bankrupted an entire city on a wild goose chase
kek this sort of thing is actually pretty common
local school near me did the same thing but on a smaller scale
Bruce donates a lot to charities. These can be used as tax write offs.
Also, everything he acquires for his crime-fighting purposes are "off the books". There wouldn't be a red flag, red tape, or a paper/digital trail for the IRS investigate in the first place.
>>78163393
Story?
people in this thread think the IRS is scary
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Snow_White
>>78163189
In this scenario Batman isn't Batman in anyway other than he has all his shit.
>>78162078
They do something similar to this during the Utopia arc, so it'd make a lot of sense.
Or Beast managed to rig it so the whole thing runs off a 9V battery
>>78163436
>Or Beast managed to rig it so the whole thing runs off a 9V battery
Are you nerfing Hank's intellect? Ii'm fairly certain he'd have the mansion rigged so that the whole place ran off of a single potato. Hell the Blackbird's probably powered by a hamster on a treadmill.
>>78163425
Kek, this. You know how underpaid, understaffed, and disgruntled the IRS is?
>>78163489
Well he originally had it run off a potato, but then he got so mad at Cyclops for being green he turned it into a 9V so people could go off at him for damaging the environment
>>78162871
>secret funds for mysterious habits
Nothing mysterious about them. He's a known playboy that routinely showboats his wealth and goes all over the world at a drop of a hat. Which you even point out in the third bit.
> >lying to investors and company officials about company budgets
He went public about Wayne Industries ties to Batman and how they helped fund his gadgets etc.
> >living extravagant lifestyles at the expense of his consumers instead of putting the money back into improving Gotham
He's a board member at Arkham, has numerous hospitals and charities named after him and the family. Provides countless scholarships, is at nearly every opening of a new orphanage. has his named plastered on every event that's supposed to improve the city.
Nigga do you even read/watch anything Batman related?
>>78160720
Oh, ha ha ha ha. If I showed you my basement, I'd have to kill you. HAAAAH hahahahaha- no, seriously, what do you think happened to the contractors who BUILT it?
>>78163006
Have you ever been in downtown Gotham at night officer? You'd be insane not to wear something like that.
>>78161273
Dead contractors.
>>78163494
Considering the IRS is one of the most important and best funded public organisations in the states I'd say not that much but I'd have to go through their yearly work satisfaction queries to give a general and working answer.
>>78163575
Or blind ones.
>>78163425
>>78163494
>>78163589
>They managed to steal data from the IRS
>But not from the CIA
Something about that just doesn't ring a bell.
>>78163589
Yet despite all that every year there are reports of how overworked, understaffed, and how tax rebates will be slow going out because they can not handle the work load of tax returns every year.
This is a fucking yearly process that is expected to occur and the agency routinely fails to do their job.
The IRS is a fucking joke.
>>78163425
>the IRS is scary
Even Joker didn't want to fuck with them.
>>78163712
They will go to the ends of the Earth to get the money they think they're owed, but when it comes to getting it back to the tax payers it's a totally different story.
>>78160783
Because he's a out of touch one percent er who hates paying taxes while getting off on mauling up urban poor and the mentally disableD in a bat costume.
>>78163712
>there are reports
I'd love to read them if you remember where you saw them.
>>78163704
>>78163744
>>78163494
Should have been
>people in this thread think the IRS is scary
But I deleted the carat on accident
>>78163744
Even Joker fears the Jews.
>>78163771
No they wont. Often they will fucking settle with you saying "Ok you owe is 100k, we'll take 50k and call it done. just to get this over with".
Hell you can be late with your shit and they will still take a lower amount just to say they got something from you.
>>78163776
Every fucking year.
http://money.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/articles/2015/03/31/when-you-should-and-shouldnt-worry-if-your-tax-refund-is-delayed
http://nationalreport.net/2014-federal-tax-refunds-delayed-october-2015/
http://www.forbes.com/sites/kellyphillipserb/2015/02/20/up-to-1-million-taxpayers-could-see-delayed-refunds-after-obamacare-snafu/
That's just the first three after a quick google search.
>>78161823
> catastrophically failed
Then he burns it down, fakes his death, and starts over somewhere else. It's called PREP TIME for a reason, dingus.
>>78163407
It's complicated shit but basically
>athletic director+band/choir/drama/etc denies School Committee guy+wife for coaching positions
>school committee and their newly placed superintendent start a witch hunt against the director and the teacher
>they spent over $30,000 "investigating" a supposedly missing $7,000
>there was no missing money and they knew it
>all arts programs were cancelled because of the investigation
>director and teachers cant get their jobs back because the school refuses to release the results of the investigation
>pic related are the average books in the school
>>78160720
But most of it are declared as prototype in the weapons division. Wayne is defense contractor after all.
>>78163712
OP is probably European anyways
>>78163928
Neat, thanks for the links.
>>78163712
And no presidential candidate is saying shit about making things better?
>>78163983
>Honouring America guide on page 1
Sorry, but as a Eurofag that is hilariously cliche
>>78161823
>If it reaches the stage where they feel they have to visit the manor and inspect it, they'll have warrants and police or federal backup.
Bruce's lawyers and accounts will have it all settled up before it gets to that stage though.
Hell, Bruce probably pays more tax than he needs to so he avoids this sort of trouble in the first place.
I don't work for the IRS but i'm an internal auditor for a large mortuary and memorial park company and it's not hard to "hide" assets and expenses under different names. GAAP doesn't specify what you need to name your stuff, only that you have to properly credit liabilities.
Like in TDK, you can put all of this under R&D and no one would care.
>>78163983
You should sell this picture as a work of art called "fall of the American dream"
On a related note, those people that go around serving people make how much money? What are those qualifications?
>>78164364
I can see that selling for hundreds of thousands of dollars, because art browsing people are just that retarded.
>people just watched a girl get stabbed in the throat because they thought it was performance art.
>>78164277
No they all do. There is always talk about reworking the tax system in order to make easier to file your taxes and less complex for the agency to sort through. Anytime someone mentions "tax reform" they are talking about reworking how the IRS works.
>>78163376
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22HcvlmfRZY
>>78164523
>half the money was fake
>he got the final laugh from beyond the grave
never gets old
>>78163928
The first article is literally a hoax.
http://www.forbes.com/sites/kellyphillipserb/2014/10/10/taxpayers-freaking-out-over-hoax-claiming-2015-irs-refunds-already-delayed/
The second one is a general article discussing the american federal tax refund and how long it typically takes, with 90% of all cases being handled in less than 21 days, with the ones requiring special attention and possibly further investigating. Not something a reasonable person should get mad about.
The third one is legitimate with 150,000 confirmed people across several states getting a form with outdated information. A clear mistake, but again not a reason to literally get mad about.
Pretty weak showing of this hyped up incompetence. Almost as if the hate was just a kneejerk reaction.
>>78164310
Blame the fact that Texas gets to decide what goes in our text books.
>>78164733
Article taken from AP. Chief himself saying there will be delays.
http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/12/19/irs-chief-warns-refund-delays-over-budget-cuts.html
CNN reporting on the same thing
http://money.cnn.com/2015/01/13/pf/taxes/tax-refund-delay/
CBS pointing out the effect the ACA has had over the process
http://www.cbsnews.com/news/how-obamacare-could-delay-your-tax-refund/
2013, Government shutdown delays refunds
http://money.cnn.com/2013/12/18/pf/taxes/2014-tax-season/
Same in 2012
https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#safe=off&q=delayed+tax+returns+2012
Another delay going into 2014
http://www.forbes.com/sites/kellyphillipserb/2013/10/22/irs-announces-delayed-start-to-2014-tax-season/
IRS explaining their delays
http://www.forbes.com/sites/kellyphillipserb/2013/03/09/irs-explains-delays-in-processing-some-returns-claiming-education-credits/
This is an annual occurrence. First links were just the top three off google. You can find these articles in bulk just by scrolling down. There is always an excuse but the trend here is the IRS either delaying returns and pushing back dates for something that is the main function.
The point here is to display their incompetence and demonstrate how the "boogy man" meme that surrounds them is utter nonsense. They are just another agency like any other.
>>78163387
Well, it's not so much that Batman's committed a crime (outside of vigilantism, having a boatload of weapons without licenses and depending on which version of Batman, there's breaking international laws, kidnapping, murder, negligence etc), but it's just a matter of his cover being blown.
I would assume his last resort would be a self destruct sequence to cover up his identity as Batman.
>>78163532
>Nigga do you even read/watch anything Batman related?
I'm convinced that people who make those complaints legitimately don't.
>>78160783
Rich people don't pay taxes on America
>>78162691
I keked
>>78160783
Nobody cared who I was till I dodged the tax
>>78160720
The IRS doesn't go after billionaires
>>78162701
I once had an idea for a NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES called WAYNE, that would deal with his day-to-daylife. We see him plenty during the night, but what about during the day?
It'd mostly deal with him on how he shapes his public image constantly, monologues about how he can culture the Bruce image, while diverting attention from any tics or habits that may give him away.
Dealing with other companies, in a sort of coporate espionage/mystery setting as well to gain interest. Solving shit as Bruce.
>>78172427
1) he's often Batman during the day too
2) that's Gotham tier "afraid of the genre" bullshit. Think smaller, the premise is a great idea for a comic mini or OGN
>>78172454
You're right, I'm thinking too big.
I'll write some scripts after I'm done with work.
What the fuck is up with the power level bullshit in this thread
>Oh yeah well the IRS has tasers and X ray vision that can find the batcave no matter how much he tries to hide it!
>Yeah but the bat computer already warned Batman they were coming 27 months ago, now he's hdiding all his gear in Zimbabwe
This is playground tier stuff
>>78160720
>Do you bother if I take a look
Not in my English! Go back to shit school and tell your boss to send an English speaker next time.
>>78161375
And of course you know that this is common procedure for big top secret federal construction projects because you totally know about these kind of things.
>>78172531
Welcome to /co/
