>quit drinking
>get job
>get gf
>get hobbies
>try to have fun as much as i can
>still not as good as drinking
>start drinking again
>somehow retain gf and job
>quit hobbies
>have a blast every day ranging from drunk to wasted around friends and family members
>they care about me but understand that I can quit and have, but sober life just isn't enjoyable
>live a decent life drunk except for the occasional horrible hangover
>and except for those early morning hours when everyone is asleep and i'm still drinking with no one to talk to and am forced to realize that I will die far before all my loved ones because of my habit
who functioning al/ck/oholic here?
>>7828891
>last year law school
>top 10% of my class
>no friends besides married classmate I am fucking
>drink daily, oxycotin 2x/week
If having a job is functioning then I guess I'm functioning. But I'm sure I'm developing ascites due to cirrhosis or pancreatic problems. There is a constant dull ache on my right side with occasional jolts of sharp pain and I feel bloated like I have 20 pounds of farts in my stomach. I was hoping to just choke on vomit in my sleep or have a stroke from DT's
this is shaping up to be a pretty bad way to die, but I'm excited for it to be over
>quit 4chan
>get job
>get gf
>get hobbies
>try to have fun as much as i can
>still not as good as 4chan
>start shitposting again
>somehow retain gf and job
>quit hobbies
>have a blast every day moving from /tv/ to /sp/ posting with friends and board members
>they care about me but understand that I can quit and have, but real life just isn't enjoyable
>live a decent life shitposting except for the occasional horrible ban
>and except for those early morning hours when everyone is asleep and i'm still posting with no one to talk to and am forced to realize that I will die far before all my loved ones because of my habit
>>7828966
Penis
>>7828903
>fucking a married woman
i hope the husband shoots your brains out
>>7828903
Fellow lawfag here. Just graduated, studying for the bar.
You say last year of school, but it's summer, so you're a rising 3L?
Also, fuck you for fucking that guy's wife, and she will go to hell for doing that. I can't even imagine doing that to someone.
>>7828903
WHEN IT ALL COMES CRASHING DOWN
>have job
>have gf
>have hobbies
>still get shitfaced four out of seven days of the week
>everything is fine
>no srsly
Get off 4chan every once in a while anons. I'm not going to call you names or anything else but suggest that you get off 4chan and fucking do something because I want you to be happy.
>>7829137
>she will go to hell for doing that
really man
>>7829162
*tips*
how's reddit during the summer?
>>7829159
>I want you to be happy.
I literally don't believe it's possible for a human to be happy. I know it's possible to convince yourself that you are though.
life is suffering. but if you feel like you're happy I'm glad for you honestly
>>7829178
What school are you at?
>>7829185
University of British Columbia.
>>7829178
>He is like flanders
So he's a nice guy?
you're fucked up dude
I get it's true all Iawyers are sociopaths
>>7829196
>University of British Columbia
Ah, a leaf, gotcha.
>>7828891
yep.
having a bad patch right now as my relationship is in the toilet and my career is teetering, but it'll blow over.
>750-1l a night
>highly paid professional
>speaking gigs
>secret autist
>fml
i just want to hide for like 4-6 hours day, is that too much to ask
>>7829205
He is a cuck whose idea of fun is having a board game night and drinking root beer and playing WoW
>>7829207
Yes sir. Going to get that JD though
>>7829209
>a board game night and drinking root beer and playing WoW
sounds awesome desu
>>7829209
So that Means he deserves it?
Look at you, you're a loser with no friend on a fucking cooking board on a site known for being associated with the far-right.
Do whatever you want to justify being a fucking dick, but at the end of the day that's what you are a dick and a lawyer. But I guess that's redundant.
>>7829221
If you are a manchild
>>7829209
Gee, I wonder why no one likes you
>>7829224
>posting on 4chan
>posts about cooking
>calling other people "manchilds"
Nice irony.
>>7829223
I don't give a shit. Should have not got married at 22. She is going to cheat anyway may as well be with me. I don't have any political affiliation and you are here just like me. I don't want friends because people are unreliable. I only care about money and my pet rabbit.
>>7829224
Is manchild really supposed to be an insult? because it's not insulting to me. I fault the woman for not just breaking up with him much more than you though.
>>7829237
>you are here just like me
Yeah, but I'm fully aware of where I am, you obviously do considering you think you're better than some guy because he likes play board games.
>I only care about money
Yeah we get it, that's why you're a lawyer and probably a kike.
>>7829238
>one minute apart
and nice samefag, dipshit.
>>7829246
you obviously don't*
>>7829237
>antisocial
>wants to be a lawyer
>Canada
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
Good fucking luck, kid. Maybe you'll manage to be a law clerk for the rest of your life.
>>7829246
I was not even trying to samefag that is me.
>kike
Lol nope. Not a Jew at all. But have fun being poor, uneducated and cucked. I feel sorry for you.
>>7829209
Sounds like a decent nigh
>>7828891
My family seems to have a serious problem with alcoholism. I don't drink because of that. Stuck between trying to get out of restaurants, or go higher up the ladder in a nicer place. Stuck in a toxic relationship with occasional bright spots of amazing beauty, then on any given minute of the day clarity sets in, and the world grays out again.
I find my vices elsewhere, because everyone has a vice.
Sorry shit sucks for you without alcohol, at least you are a man. Alcohol breaks women down faster than men, have you ever seen a 40-50 year old female alcoholic? It's a fucking shit show.
Just being real though, try and have some sober time so you can keep your head straight. If you need alcohol when times are good, god forbid what you will do if you let shit fall apart bro.
Eh... Good luck. Try and pick up a drinking hobby, it will still be fun man.
>>7829257
Since I am in the top 10% I will become an associate at a large firm which I am already interning at. Will make 80-90k starting. After 5 years guaranteed 150k+ not including bonuses.
You are mad because just face it, you are a loser alcoholic. At least I am a high functionjng degenerate. I've been drinking almost daily for the past 2 years and still exceed compared to the fucking coddled Asians who do literally nothing but study. I'm better than you man. Face it.
>>7829261
>poor
Nope, make 6 figures
>uneducated
Nope, have a degree in Electrical Engineering.
>cucked
Not going to happen, I don't waste my time with romantic relationships.
Hey at least you can make it as a champion of bestiality law. That's an upcoming field there now isn't it? "The right to fuck your dog" lol what a pathetic country
>>7829273
>Rephrasing that first sentence about my family and alcohol.
Alcoholism runs in my fucking blood. I know what happens if I pick up the bottle, so I don't.
>>7829261
>he thinks he can get rich working in law while being too autistic to make friends
>>7829274
>and still exceed
Ah, so you're just lying then. You should develop a basic vocabulary before trying to convince people you're in law school
>>7829274
> I will become an associate at a large firm which I am already interning at. Will make 80-90k starting. After 5 years guaranteed 150k+
And guess what you'll do. You'll pick up fucking scraps and be the equivalent of a secretary. I hope you enjoy working well over 50 hours a week, because you'll do exactly that. My best friend's dad is a lawyer, there's a reason why he stopped working for the big firms after a few years. And if you start your own firm you will fail, you're not special and you won't become big, so don't think you'll be "one of the ones who make it". You're going to be doing shit work at a shit job for the rest of your life. Congrats
>>7829279
I always swore to myself that I would never drink alcohol because of the way my father treated me when he drank. The very first time I got peer pressured into having a drink that changed and I became a completely reckless alcoholic almost overnight. Stay strong my nigga, it's not worth starting
>>7829293
rekt
Dude's probably a freshman who managed to get a 4.0 his first year.
>>7829300
and thinks he's hot shit*
forgot to add that onto the end
What's functioning?
I function that my parents that are old enough to retire in 2-4 years times and that i live with know but still pretend to sort of 'not know' and half not care what i do but at this point their main priority is that I'll find motivation to move out. I won't, I need the money I earn on my part time job for alcohol
>>7829274
Do you not know what an interview is kiddo? Swear to god these poor little shits who think a 4.0 is worth shit beyond the GPA requirements that only a handful of jobs have
My parents were in complete denial about how much I drink. Until I got a fungal infection and a blood test showed my liver was not healthy enough to handle the drugs they wanted to give me for it. It's kind of a relief for me to know they understand how much damage I'm doing to myself, strangely. I work a shit job, but I'm not really functional.
>>7829296
Haha dude you are so angry. I don't want to be big or have my own firm. Keep crying and grasping at straws because you are a loser. I love the work I do. How do you think I am in the top 10%? Faggot
>>7829283
>friends
>law
Lol. It's all about how you can use someone to your advantage out here.
>get depressed
>have one drink
>happy again
WHAT IS THIS LIFE
>>7829335
You sound like a self-absorbed crybaby and I hope you choke on your vomit.
>thread ruined by some lawyerfag and another person trying to actually hurt each other's feelings
Why do you even bother arguing and insulting each other? None of you will change anyone else's mind. Let's get back to being drinking.
what's the worst thing you've done while drunk?
>>7829275
>degree in Electrical Engineering
Confirmed for autist
>>7829452
i started a fire with some friends in the ash tray outside my apartment and was promptly evicted. i could have been charged with arson but they didn't follow through with anything. there was a camera by the front door and they showed me the footage, it was actually pretty damn funny in hindsight but not at the time.
a couple years after that i lived with a female roommate who i had a huge crush on which was a fuck up in itself. we were out at a bar one night and from what i was told i was completely obliterated and overly aggressive with her. im not sure exactly what that means but i felt like a piece of shit the next day and really i still do. she was nice about it though.
>>7829477
Not the person your having an imaginary duck measuring contest with but you sound really boring. Like irrelevant no one remember you boring. No wonder you don't have friends.
>>7829516
Fuck you faggot my duck is huge
>>7829516
Dick measuring contest is what I intended to write
>>7829452
>what's the worst thing you've done while drunk?
Sent to a mental ward, twice. Two weeks each stint. The second time was bullshit:
A fellow neighbor who was MUCH more drunk than I was at the time (he was a fucking RAGER of an alcoholic who died in a house fire a year after the incident) must have seen me cleaning a gun while I was in my house, ran in my back door (like what the fuck), grabbed a phone and dialed 911 while pleading with me "not to do it."
Yes, he entered my home without my consent, and using my own home phone, called police stating I was suicidal. I was so confused and full of dread as the police were there in minutes. I shouldn't have let them in the home, as was my right, and should have kicked my neighbor's ass and thrown him out before they could do anything and, if anything, charged him with trespassing. Since I was drunk and the cop knew and despises me, he didn't listen to my story and I was escorted to a locked padded room in the hospital till I sobered up (24 hours in a cold room dressed only in linen with a camera on you at all times), then to the ward I went.
Fuck the police. And FUCK you, Matt. I'm glad you burned to death, you fucking fuck.
>>7829523
Having a dick measuring contest with a women means you were born with the world's cruelest handicap. But a duck measuring contest...I bet that isn't even your duck you schmuck.
>>7829523
shit, beat me to it
>>7829056
Because she has no agency, right?
This is not on the guy who is not in a committed relationship. The wife has a choice here. This is on her.
Is it the same pathetic faggot who starts all these threads? Take this bullshit to /adv/ or /r9k/
>>7829274
top kek. enjoy your bloated legal market.
"oh but im INTERNING so that means i'm GUARANTEED a job!"
naive wetbrained dumbass
>>7829540
Agreed. You can't be responsible for other people's relationships.
Jesus fucking Christ, OP...
are you me?
just stopping by
this thread is depressing...
Hey al/ck/s what the fuck do you mix vanilla vodka with? It's all I have on me at the moment.
I'm married and my wife and i have a child together. If I keep drinking she's going to leave me, but I still want to drink
What do
I want to drink outside the house without her finding out but she always seems to find out (can tell by looking at my eyes or the way I act)
How can I drink in secret without her knowing
Help you boozy cuckolds
>try not to drink until the weekend
>friday rolls around
>buy a handle, tell myself I'll finish it friday and saturday, then sober up sunday
>sunday rolls around and there's always enough vodka left for 2 or 3 drinks
>end up getting a buzz and say fuck it
>go buy more and get drunk all sunday
>hungover and having withdrawals on monday
>buy more beer and try to taper but usually end up feeling crappy most of the week
>start to feel better around friday
>repeat
the wild ride never ends
>>7830101
you're shit outta luck. aint no way to get that stank off you...as a horrible idea start drinking mouthwash though the constant purchasing is a dead give away. drink from you asshole. hell start meditating to experience that nirvana hooch. that'll do it.
>>7830099
Kahlua or milk
>>7829452
I've posted this before but I was blackout drunk and went to pass out in my bed, except I accidentally walked into my neighbors apartment which was unlocked and passed out naked in one of their beds...It was an apartment of 3 girls. They weren't there when I came in but they found me and called the cops
>>7830122
Holy shit
>>7830124
luckily I knew the girls and had partied with them before so they didn't press charges, but I probably could have been labeled a sex offender or something. Kind of funny story to tell now but I really lucked out
>>7829056
Where did you get this from the fuck
>>7829137
Where the fuck did you read this from you fucking faggot
>>7829177
It's a miracle weaklings like you manage to make it through the day. It won't be long after your drop dead though, pathetic fuck.
>>7830163
>weaklings like you
They wake up with a weight you will never know, let alone ever carry. The fight every day against a battle you have never even imagined. They are still here fighting something you cant even comprehend and haven't ever faced a fraction of. You are the pathetic weaking.
>>7830163
You sound like a fuckin' prick.
Seems like the best place to ask this; I bought these shitty wine stoppers from Dollar Tree, and one of them broke and the "cork" fell into the bottle. Its been a day, is it still safe to drink?
>>7830338
it's corked. i'd write it off as it's basically mustard gas now. feed it to the dog.
>>7830118
Damn :( thanks anyway but I'll give the mouthwash a miss
>>7830401
Even if it was a plastic "cork"?
Its not that big of a deal, it was a $13 bottle anyway
>>7830406
I'm memeing and know fuck all about cork spoilage anyway. If it was plastic I'd still drink it. It's not gonna taste great if it was exposed to air for a whole day though.
I've drank much worse through hair of the dog.
>3 am
>everyone is asleep with their loved ones
>the loneliness becomes an almost physical pain
>drinking more but the more I drink the more I wish I had friends
I don't even want a girlfriend. Just friends. Going to start going to bars until I meet people, this is no kind of life to live.
>work as a bartender
>went out daydrinking with coworkers yesterday (literally the whole staff went, it was a big event)
>woke up the next day hungover as fuck, drank a couple of the left-over miller lites
>went to work, drank a few vodka-tonics
>it was slow as fuck, literally nothing to do and boss let me go home after 2 hours
>later my friend texts me "dude wtf [boss] just said he sent you home for being too drunk at work"
>apparently I was fucking stumbling around and slurring like hell
is there a worse feel
>>7830755
Christ man learn to always be aware of how drunk you are. I'm sure he just thinks you are an extreme lightweight pussy drunk from the night before, and won't be too angry. Watch yourself mate.
>>7830118
Mouthwash isn't ethanol and does serious damage to you,
>>7830762
That's the thing though, not only is my boss is a good friend of mine (he was the one who got me the job) but I also drink every day, as does he and the rest of the staff. I mean he was drinking his 3rd vodka-redbull when he told me to go home, but I was still visibly drunk, apparently bordering on problematic.
Does anyone else cough a lot or vomit even on an empty stomach. Or get shakes in the jaw or hands?
>>7828891
This spoke to me. I'm literally lying beside my S/O while they sleep and heading downstairs for shots every now and then. Fuck my life. I need a change. No more.
What's the best cocktail bitters and why is it Peychaud's?
Grandfather from dad's side was an alcoholic, recovered - was in AA. Grandfather from mom's side Died from liver failure - alcoholic, drank really shady booze. My dad and his brother both alcoholics, somehow recovered in recent years. Mom - stressfull job, almost Everyday downs a couple of beers, ocassionaly wasted on weekends. Ex gf drank everyday, Wine and beers booze and drinks from time to time, had fun but lost respect for her. I liked drinking, started heavily in my teenage years, but I started doing sports semi-pro, now I'm running in competition quite good so I can't fuck up my fitness by booze. But I like craft beers every other day. But no heavy drinking Thanks to running.
>>7829208
I feel that, bro. I also work with the public and also want to be left the fuck alone and also do a fifth-1L a night.
>>7830775
Sounds like a comfy fucking job
>>7830792
How do I meet alcoholic women?
TFW no alcky gf to try weird drinks with and get wasted with every night for sloppy drunk sex and cuddles
>>7830915
this, I've never met a woman who can legitimately drink with me that isn't a homosexual (and not in the "you came on to me so I'm gonna say I'm gay" way, full blown dykes)
>>7830926
Even lesbian alcoholics are fine. I just want cute female company while I destroy myself
>>7830777
Every alcoholic gets shakes and vomits a lot you fucking mong. The physical symptoms pale in comparison to the mental onslaught of anxiety and paranoia when you're withdrawing though.
>laying in bed trying to sweat it out and feel sick is bad but manageable
>constant worries and anxiety ruin my whole fucking day and push me to drink again
I WISH THIS SHIT WOULD JUST LET ME GO
>>7830932
You can't have sex and cuddles then mate
>>7829540
This. I never understood when people with cheating spouses get mad at the side bitch/side fuckboy. As if it's not their partners fault lmao.
>>7830915
I know a few, but they're older ladies who started drinking in their old age. Grandma's sister is a heavyweight alcky who just doesn't give a fuck about people anymore. We drank together a few times, it was fun
before alcohol
>hated my life
>hated everything
>no friends
>basement tier social skills
>no real world skills because I couldn't care enough to develop them
After alcohol
>start enjoying life
>go out more
>develop social skills
>stop wanting to kill myself
>pussy galore
>pick up hobbies
>develop enough skills to become a desirable employee
>instead open 2 businesses
>kind of living the life right now
Sometimes I go a little overboard maybe once every 3-6 months.
But I still got friends and family trying to tell me I need to quit despite the fact that they have witnessed me go dry for almost a year and shutdown my first business and turned back into a recluse.
>wife said that I should start drinking again
I did and got my life back on track.
something is wrong with me. Is it because my family tree leads back 20% to a Scottish sailing family, 40% back to some north English miners, another 20% to the Congo basin and then mix and match?
>>7829056
Lol monogamists build partners up so hard that even when it's someone they've never meet they'll automatically defend the person in the couple. It's such a fucking cult.
>>7830990
I never got this either.
>you fucked my wife/husband I am going to kill you!
Like your partner didn't willingly spread their legs or plunge right the fuck in. If your partner is a major slut will you fight the world before you realize where the real problem lies?
>>7830949
>every alcoholic gets shakes and vomits a lot
Either that is wrong or my 10 beers on a slow day is not enough to be considered an Al/ck/y
>>7829452
>worst thing you have ever done while drunk
I have done some worst shit while drunk but the most stupid in my mind was while at a beach party I boarded a boat at a regatta in broad daylight and tried to steal some booze, got caught and tried to fight the revelers and crew for it.
My partner in crime at the exact same time was picking a fight with the prime ministers son on and his sailor buddies the beach. To the point where he had his dukes up and ready to go.
After that we went and "borrowed" some cars to go to the harbor for more booze.
This is a small country so everyone I know heard about it within a couple of days.
>>7828903
Kill yourself.
>>7831069
That's actually pretty badass in a degenerate, fucked up sort of way.
>>7831069
lol I remember the days of having to steal booze. When I was in college I'd always run out once the liquor stores were gone, and my neighbors always had parties on their porch outside. I'd try to sneak up the porch and snatch some stuff from their cooler they'd leave out there. I got chased down the block once when they caught me, luckily it was a fatty so I lost him. Not too proud of those days though
>>7828891
I'm just your average white-collar stoner. I work a professional office job, make a good salary (slightly higher than the median household income for my city), have benefits, good financial shape, gf, volunteer work on the side, etc, but I'm high almost constantly. I'll use 5mg edibles at regular intervals so that I'm high consistently at work, too. I'll go several months where I'm never sober except maybe the last couple hours of being asleep. Done this for years.
I also rather like kratom and sometimes get a bit addicted to that, but having to manually fill and then down 24 gelcaps of foul plant material every day, then not eat because of the associated opioid constipation, makes it more self limiting.
Occasionally I do get more into drinking, I'll have a couple glasses of scotch a night for a few weeks, but I start feeling like shit within a month and go back to 'softer' drugs.
well i still havent learned to control my lust for alcohol but now im actually getting good grades this semester. ive been very busy lately which completely distracted me, but the second im left alone i get fucking wasted off my arse. i swear im worse than a child. its not just booze, i also chainsmoke. if i make it to 40 ill be genuinely surprised
Alcohol isn't my issue, it's weed.
I usually smoke or vape everyday, multiple times.
I know I should slow down. Life just gets boring when you're high that much.
>>7828891
Christ this one hits close to home. I have a great job, very good prospects, more than enough romance, a lovely family and more friends then I can make time for. Yet in the end I need the booze to actually appreciate everything. Everyone knows about it, in this loving self-destructive manner that still begets respect as long as you get shit done and aren't drunk at five in the afternoon every day.
My dad kept this same behaviour up for 53 years, lets see how I will manage.
>>7828941
Cheers
>>7830915
Meet them at bars, lonely alcoholic women tend to hang out at bars a lot.
Unfortunately for your alcoholism, if you really hit it off and decide you want to be "better partners for eachother" one of you will probably want to drink less. Also alcoholics can be difficult and unpredictable (but you know that anon)
>>7831160
Thing is. I didn't need to steal the booze and never really have. I was a grown man with a good deal of money but I just didn't want to hitch a ride 5 minutes up the road to buy more so I just tapped into my swashbuckling roots and orchestrated a 10 mins boarding with me crawling on the deck thinking I was fucking solid snake and then only after being cornered by 10 (maybe 5?) did I dive off and swam under other boats to get away. I was literally ready to fight 4 people over their own cooler.
>>7831098
I have other stories that aren't as adventurous but almost equally crazy/stupid that I may write up later on.
>>7830990
Exactly. Zero logical sense.
I'm the kind of alcoholic who doesn't shower or take care of myself. If it weren't for my glorious mother, I'd be on the streets.
I should probably quit, for my mom's sake.
I drank 1.7l Of vodka yesterday, started drinking in the morning, had a fight with my sub-human dad, he called the police to our house, talked to them for one hour, drinking my fifth liter of biter now today.
>>7831642
0.7l of vodka 2 days ago also, and I had no food in the last 3 days except some crisps. I was trying to quit
>>7831354
It's probably because deep down inside they are hoping it wasn't their partner doing that they were seduced by the side person
>>7831646
So, a natural born real life cuck? One that would continue to father the other guys child.
>>7831475
>I should probably quit, for my mom's sake.
I love complete worthless fucks up like you who continually put your mom threw absolute hell because you are selfish.
The best part is, is our final act of selfishness will be dying of cirrhosis and making her bury you
>>7828891
>drink hard until out of money
>get job working back of house
>stop drinking
>gf "job is killing you. quit quit quit" for a month straight
>finally quit
>start drinking
>gf "i'm worried about financial security" blah blah blah
>can't find work in my trained field
>she starts drinking more and paying for most of our drinks
that's all fol/ck/s this ship is gonna SINK
>>7831794
i spent 500 dollars on booze in 2 weeks. ;-;
>>7830915
We met in colleage,she was philosophy minor, pretty fucked up, daddy issues and whatnot. Was fun until one night she was smoking j sitting in The window wasted and she almost fell 1 storey head frist, caught at the very last moment. Still miss her a bit, she's one of those people in life that you'll probably never get truly Over.
>>7831016
I have a theory about why successful people turn to drugs. You seem smart enough that normal life would be easy and boring as shit, and your brain is too aware to enjoy anything. Alcohol makes your brain a little dumb and easier to please. Sober life just sucks for some people.
>>7831034
Drink hard liquor and then come back. Beers always felt like a comfy pass out drunk, liquor always more intense. I never get beer withdrawls, but my stoma can't hold the volume of beer I need anymore to be proper drunk. I'll get sick and bloated. Liquor is more concentrated and doesn't fill me up and gets me drunk.
>>7831185
Weed is so lame to me. I get that some people feel less anxiety and euphoria, but I get stuck in my head and sad.
>>7829274
>he thinks drinking for two measly fucking years is anything
>>7829209
you are just making it worse. You are just coming off more and more as a psychopath. I hope he finds out and divorces her, there is no way she would get anything if she is cheating like that.
>>7831028
>seeing other people hurt shouldn't make you upset
what the fuck man
>>7832232
this guy fucks
recovering alcoholic with an ankle bracelet on
sober 9 days
it isnt good. the only good part is not being hungover, but i would suck a donkey dick for a bottle of good whiskey right now and get away with it. being sober isnt worth it, and is ultimately more depressing and pointless than being a drunk
