lmao if you don’t immediately hand one of these to your waiter when you go out to eat
>classic image.jpg
If all that comes with a 50 percent tip then its a deal.
>>7793947
>implying advanced autism wouldn't just tip precisely 15% of the check if you followed all of those rules
"How to be as difficult a person as possible", by Anon (Meaning whoever wrote this, not necessarily OP).
>>7793947
Honestly service as described would deserve 25% tip at most
nigga coulda wrote "Just fuck my shit up" and save himself some time lmao i was like lmao
>>7793933
> Do not serve any ice or straws with out water unless we ask to have it served.
No, ice in the water is SOP, though with a paper-wrapped straw on the side and not in the water.
>how to order spit and cum with your food.jpg
>>7794023
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvVdIg-sTo4
>>7793933
>>7793933
as a customer I imagine most of those requests are shit waiters have to ask cuz their managers demand it. Why get all fussy over people just doing their job? Just politely nod and get through it. Fuck.
>>7794011
>No, ice in the water is SOP
Not in america , most of us expect lots of ice, its sunny and hot here,
>>7794067
>reading comprehension
Pick 0.
>>7793933
Who do you hand it to? your waiter? Then youd already be seated, you want him to move you? Do you hand it to the hostess? She wont be refilling your glass or asking if youre done...sooooo? Hand it to everyone? Thats retarded.
>>7793996
OP just stole both the image and accompanying text from Twitter
>>7794098
you give it to the hostess and tell her to pass your instructions to the waiter. If the waiter can't handle all the requests on the list, you demand your meal be comped by the manager and then leave without tipping.
>>7794067
Commas, how the fuck do they work?
Wait, are there seriously people who get upset by the term 'guys'?
>>7794230
Yeah, they're called nu-males.
>>7794011
>No, ice in the water is SOP
Do you live in Mexico?
>Do not serve straws with our water
When I used to wait tables I had this lesbian couple that came in all the time and both always ordered iced tea. One of them never ever used the straw that I gave them. I couldn't fucking remember which one didn't use the straw because there was another couple of lesbians who were regulars and always ordered iced tea as well. If only she would have asked for no straw!
>>7794642
fucking lesbians and their iced tea. does it mask the taste of nasty pussy or something? cause when i waited, all the lesbians that came in always ordered iced fucking tea.
maybe it numbs the tongue
>>7794959
What the fuck are you talking about? Sweet iced tea is the drink of the American south. It's a drink huge swaths of the population like.
>>7793933
>lmao if you don’t immediately hand one of these to your waiter when you go out to eat
than you are not autistic.
>>7795093
maybe the amerifat south is all lesbian
>>7793933
Shit made me laugh to be honest
You expect the waitress at Applebee's to give a shit?
>>7793933
>seat us in the quietest table
while this is understandable from a customer stand point you are basically asking for the waitress or waiter to get themselves fired. they can't seat you in a part of the restaurant they don't control as divide out by the manager/front of house. Most places realize this system may ease tensions from entitled servers a bit and fucks the customer but those restaurants that have not are playing the prisoners dilemma. All it takes is one bitch saying "theyre in my area taking my customers" and it all comes toppling down.
>>7794959
As a lesbian I only drink regular unsweetened ice tea. I also don't want to be a fucking landwhale. Iced tea is the only calorie free drinks most places carry that costs money. if they get sweet tea theyre probably college students hooked on those arizona cans or theyre southern dykes. If I feel like ordering a drink, it's going to be coffee, tea, or ice tea. and given ice tea is a fountain drink I can't understand what the big deal is compared to the other two.
>>7794642
Just ask, most people don't want to bother you and your routine to say you don't want a straw and give you more shit to remember. it's petty.
>>7794025
If someone started bitching like that they'd be asked to leave. If you can't even treat someone like another human being and are that demanding and picky then you should stay at home. There's a difference between expecting good service and expecting servers to suck the shit out of your asshole and then having them thank you for it.
Then again I live in a country where people find the american tipping system nothing short of insane.
I'm not into tipping if I don't have the money but damn, I expect the base level of service of "transmit my order to the kitchen" and then "walk ten feet to bring me it" for a no tip situation. This kind of attitude is 50% tip territory for sure.
>>7794230
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXO5ffjAufE
>>7793933
waiter here. i have had two people try this. both times i gave them a contract to sign stating their needs required a 25 percent tip.
>>7793933
If I get poor service I just spit on the servers tip.
>>7796619
As long as you want to be a girl, even if it means giving up on sex or masturbation, go for transition.
If not, just go to the gender bender threads on /d/ and fap a lot. Maybe learn how to change your voice to a female one to enhance the experience.
>>7793933
>>7793999
This. I hate when wait staff wants to fucking chit chat
>>7796805
>being in iran
You where already dead/fucked. Poor lesbians, they never had a chance there.
>>7796599
full autismode
>>7794959
A lesbian's vagina would smell fine unless they're putting and leaving all kinds of shit in there. Most commonly, girl who fucks guys will get her pH fucked up by letting them nut inside and not cleaning up.
>>7796823
A lot of Limmy's "You know what I hate?" sketches are pretty autistic, that's why they're so funny.
Limmy on Americanisms:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnGPgCVJUsI
Limmy on "110%"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rl4QMS0Zh_w
>>7793933
Fuck that.
Whoever wrote that expects to be treated like they are in a fine dining restaurant regardless of where they are. If you are eating at fucking Applebee's, you can expect to be treated like you're eating at fucking Applebee's.
Fine dining and luxury restaurants specifically train their staff in the expert "quiet efficiency" mode. Middle class restaurants don't. So if you want to be treated like that, you're going to have to pay more than $30 for your meal.
>>7793933
You fucking autistic or somthing? You sound like a dick.
If I was your waiter I would just do what I normally do cause I wouldn't expect a tip from you. Plus I'd prioritize my other tables for things like refills and checking up
>>7797875
Pretty much this.
Having to communicate through a long note in a normal setting with an established etiquette is something a 13 year old kid would do who thinks he knows better than the rest of the world, or just plain autism.
>inb4 where do you think you are
>>7793933
Why does common waiter courtesy trigger whoever made this?
Asking if they were here before, explaining the menu and making small talk are things that differentiates a bad server from a good server.
>>7793933
Is this for a group of deaf schizoids or something?
>>7794106
That's why I said Anon. Whoever the person really was.
>>7793933
Manager of a restaurant here. I would throw you out if one of the waitstaff showed me this. No one table will make or break us, and the fact that you are advertising that you are an asshole who will annoy, stress out and otherwise make the lives of front (and probably back, too) harder than it is for no reason means I don't want you in my place.
I would take a picture of this or keep it for your inevitable yelp review that I would get taken down, or to show the owner should you ever get ahold of him. Owner is an angry drunk, so if you somehow managed to even find him, he might just throw something on you. Good luck!
>>7797875
Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with this guy. Honestly if I was a waiter, I'd go out of my way to do every single thing on the list that they told me not to do, just to piss them off. They're not gonna tip anyways so why the fuck not.
At least in that case they'd never come back and I wouldn't have to deal with their autism more than once. I think I could sacrifice one tip to ensure that.
>>7794025
It doesn't matter how much of a cunt she's being, it's still illegal to do shit like that. Just fucking not serve her. That's how you get your dumb ass fired. For thinking you're required to get petty vengeance because someone hurt your feelings. The American dining experience is retarded because kids think they're deserved the utmost rewards with tips and dick-sucking for working a minimum wage job. While you are worthy of some respect for handling their food, you are not deserving of anything more.
>>7793933
>Waiter should be observant enough to judge when we are finished with a course
Every single party winds up eating at different paces and some shits don't want you taking plates away if theres any food left at all no matter how far into the meal it is. Waiters aren't fucking psychic
Daily reminder that if you don't actively try to make an entry-level worker's job as smooth and digestible as possible you're a literal fucking monster and I argue you're responsible for dozens if not hundreds of suicides.
>>7794025
LOL, they spat in food and stuff because to get revenge on a customer! That was a really original and creative idea.
WOW. Is there an etiquette board? Tell the m'aitre d, don't do this. This is absolutely middle-class behavior
>>7796615
I want to believe.
>>7796599
classic.
i love limmy
>>7796861
That's the joke! No granny would be so confused about LLOYDSFERMASSY that they would die but it's funny anyway.
>>7793933
I think I would probably just ask those motherfuckers to leave.
the perfect waiter would combine the excellent customer service of an american with the silence of a european
but no, we either get chatty fuckers who can wait properly, or snobby fucks who ignore us
>>7796802
Almost no employee 'wants' to talk to you, their bosses just make them to do it
I take offense to being called "guys" in general. I am a man. When women talk about "guys" it makes me angry. "Girls" like "guys". Women should like "men". If you are a "woman" and you are talking about "guys" then you are either a "girl" or a Huffington Post sex columnist.
>>7793933
I don't see anything wrong with this, in fact they're asking you to do less than what the job requires. Some customers are bitchy, but the majority of people want good food and standard service. To be honest I never expected a tip, or even wanted one since I cooked and served the food myself. I'd rather have people enjoy what I made, than give me change left over from the bill. Shit is taxed anyway so who gives a fuck?
I'm really not opposed to licking the food of people who are total shitheads. Don't like reading that? Don't be a total shithead, because for you there is no etiquette, there are no manners and there are no rules. I've already accepted that you're too good to leave a tip,and that's just a hazard of the job. So enjoy and remember that your behavior may come with a side of my DNA.
>>7799051
I am fairly certain that I have never met you, but I am 100% sure that I would hate you if I ever did.
>>7797979
It's from a fucking movie calm down
>>7799110
I know your feels senpai
>>7797920
>making small talk
amerikek spotted
i want my waiter/waitress to not say an extra word unless i'm flirting with them, in which case they're allowed to giggle & reply. common courtesy, really.
>>7794032
>146.jpg
nah you
>>7793933
>printed directly from WYSIWYG word processor
>not properly typeset with LaTeX
>>7793933
this is my new standar for tips op, i wont hand a fucking letter but i will silently drop money for pulling this shit
0 mistakes is 20%
1 mistake is 15%
2 mistakes is 10%
anything beyond there is no tip
>>7793947
Alright, let me explain something to you. Your job is not hard. You’re lucky society allows it to even exist. You think the customer couldn’t take his plate from the pass and work the fountain?
Your Basic Job
>Toss my plate onto the table.
>Fill my glass when I sit down.
That’s the bare bones of your job. If that’s all you’re willing to do, that’s fine. But know that your salary is commensurate to the difficulty of the task.
Your Real Job
>Place my plate on the table with a smile and a friendly “heeeeere you gooooo. :)” Yes, you need to be bubbly as heck.
>Refill my glass, and anything else I have that needs refilling, regularly, and without me having to flag you down like a goddamn Apache helicopter.
>Ask me midway through my meal if everything is okay.
>Do everything you can to rectify the situation if it’s not.
>Bring my bill promptly, but not before asking if I want to order dessert.
>If it’s very busy and food is slow coming, come to my table a little while after I order and apologize for the situation.
That’s what is EXPECTED of you. If you’re not willing to do that, that’s fine. But all that is what you get tipped for. You get tipped for doing an exceptional job. You get tipped for adding to the experience of the customer. Your job is to make me feel like a KING. Your job is to make me feel like less of an idiot for dropping $30 on $4 worth of food and $1 worth of energy and labor. Your job is to act like your ability to go to the drug store and pick up your baby's ear medicine depends solely on MY enjoyment of the evening, MY generosity, and MY wallet. I am your GOD.
>>7793933
I agree with all of this except for the Ice and straws line. What's the deal with that?
>>7799913
>I am your god
Suburbanite mother detected
>>7799913
I honestly agree with this
Most wait staff are piss poor
Better to cook at home
>>7796599
Why do people not understand that "guys" isn't a gendered term?
>>7793933
I'd reply in sign language
>>7799928
People who get very easily offended and want something to bitch about.
>>7799913
I don't generally take things that seriously on here but, I gotta say, this made me pretty mad.
Mostly because I know there are people who genuinely feel this way. Who gives a shit? Relax!
>>7800021
Yes, it’s a service job. It’s not glamorous. If you have self esteem issues or you’re just too damn lazy, waiting tables is not the job for you. But at the end of the day, waiting tables is waiting tables. You’re not going to make Corvette money on a Honda level job, and you need to just get the hell over it. Because let me tell you, the waiters and waitresses who actually do the job for a living? They don’t pull out their iPhone 5S’s, with the unlimited data plan that mommy and daddy pay for, and tweet about how cheap bastards never tip. They go to their tables every day and they bust their asses to EARN their living. EARN their tips. That’s the job. It’s a little less “ugh, you know THAT table isn’t gonna tip” and a little more “can I top you off, hon?” That’s the tradeoff for a job that allows you to make a living without any education and with barely being literate.
Yes, there will always be those jackasses who wouldn’t tip even if you recited Shakespeare topless while they ate. But the vast majority of people WILL tip if they know they got good, attentive service. If you’re not willing to give good, attentive service, enjoy your $2 an hour. You’re getting paid for the amount of work you’re doing. Waiting tables is essentially commission work. If you’re not willing to actually do the job, well, good luck making a living.
And by the way? If I come to your place the first time, and get crap service, I don't tip. If I come back the second time, and you get all "oh, there's the nontipper, I'm not even gonna try", guess what - there will be no third time. You'll learn VERY quickly, in the unemployment line, the value of the dollars I give to your company, tips or not.
>>7796861
Both of these ideas are talked about in the Ricky Gervais XFM
>>7799913
This nigga knows
>>7799913
>>7799922
>>I am your god
>Suburbanite mother detected
yeah dunno what this means but that guy is a trammendous faggot, he's also right that those are whats expected but this cunt seems to revel in his control and holier than thou attitude, typical human twat, so it's just one more reason to abolish tipping and pay servers a livable wage like everyone else.
>>7800034
>2 dollars an hour is fine
kill yourself.
>>7800034
RELAX!
>>7800256
>Liveable wage
Fuck off with that stupid bullshit. You know damn well that being a glorified fucking vending machine isn't worth more than that. Even if you look past the taxes part of it, it still isn't worth more than that
>>7800380
Holy shit this. All the cooks and servers on here that complain about their shit pay need to get this through their heads. You guys are glorified servants. You make shit because your job is a shit job- if you want to make good money, you should have worked harder in school and gotten a job that couldn't be done by high school dropouts or ex-cons.
>>7800021
Actually when I get legit bad service I go to the counter and pay there without leaving any tips, it works better because not only the waitress get nothing but the people operating the register and everyone around sees that I'm leaving as A displeased costumer
>>7800260
2 dollars an hour is fine for doing completely shitty work and not pleasing the customer.
If you're actually fucking working for it you'll get more than enough.
>>7799913
This guy's order at every restaurant:
>diet coke with lemon, no ice
>chicken caesar salad, dressing on the side
>>7796571
sauce on image
>>7800471
>topkek I bet I know what he orders, heh, jokes on him.
I never leave less than 15 percent unless somebody is ignoring me or being rude. Generally I leave around 25 to 30. Serving is a rough job in a lot of ways. I'm not asking to be treated like a god like some other dip shits in this thread are, I just want friendly, attentive service. At the end of the day, if I can't afford to tip, I just get it to go. Taking service without paying for it is essentially shop lifting. The aforementioned dip shit is an entitled child.
>>7800524
>pay them
>don't tip
>somehow you're not paying them now
They should just make tipping illegal so you dumb fucks stop getting scammed out of money.
>>7800524
I always ordered my food to go until I said that in a thread here and some lowly cook said they still get pissy about you not giving them their welfare (tipping) and eventually will start fucking with your food anyways. Haven't eaten from a restaurant since.
Inb4
>I'm sure they will miss you (sarcasm) kek
>>7799913
>I've never been a waiter but I'm gonna tell you what your job is like!
ok buddy calm down. Its not the waiters job to make you feel like a king and you are not my God.
The waiters job is to provide prompt and friendly service. People like you who act like a cocksucker don't get prompt and friendly service cause If i don't expect a tip I'm not gonna go out of my way to provide such service.
Also if its busy your fucking running around trying to keep everyone happy which is not as easy as you'd think.
Its people like you that makes waiters seem like dicks
>look here boy I'm your God
>DO everything exactly as I say and maybe youll get this juicey 10% tip
> Fucking asshole waiter didn't bend over backwards for me even though I'm a shit customer and don't incentivize him to actually meet my autsimo demands
Is that better or worse than pic related?
>>7793945
>classic faggot.post
>>7800554
I literally and figuratively don't give a fuck about any of that, but thanks for the wall of text. I dont care about the shitty 2/he wage, or
>OMG SO MANY RESPONSIBILITIES YOU DONT GET IT, JUST DONT GET IT
like seriously bro, Just stop.
>>7794098
Email it to the restaurant in advance with the instructions that it is to be passed out to every member of the staff, along with a picture of yourself and your friends so they know who to expect.
>>7799913
>You think the customer couldn’t take his plate from the pass and work the fountain?
Wouldn't it just be a giant cluster-fuck for most traditional (Non-fast-food) restaurants to change from a serving style to a more fast-food-type style? Even then, in fancier restaurants, do you seriously believe those people would rather go to get their own food, or that that's an effective idea for the restaurant? There's a lot of logistical errors that come up in not having wait staff that would take a good while to solve.
Also, you say:
>Your job is to make me feel like less of an idiot for dropping $30 on $4 worth of food and $1 worth of energy and labor.
But is it really worthwhile to talk about what being a waiter/waitress means when there are so many people who actively subvert it? My dad generally tips more because he knows that people will respond better in the future, and be more likely to help out with issues.
You see some genuine acts of kindness (Although you may consider it foolishness) where a waiter/waitress receives a sizable tip from a generous patron. You may also hear about a waiter/waitress being stiffed for going ABOVE AND BEYOND.
Sure, that IS something that can happen in the job. A lawyer may end up having to defend a guilty man, and potentially get them off the hook. Doesn't mean it's okay. Just means it can happen.
>>7800558
I could work around that just with what I have in my bachelor kitchen.
>>7800571
>Bribing someone so you get good service the next time
Your father is being cucked by every restaurant he visits and is part of the problem.
>>7800558
>he doesn't eat activated almonds
>>7800578
Care to explain? Are you saying that because they should be giving "good service" already?
When you've got a bunch of shitty people acting like asshats, it sort of puts a damper on your day. Why not act nice for the person who, y'know, temporarily made your day more enjoyable?
>>7800578
>cucked
Try again, newfag.
>>7800563
Ok dude its really easy to assume something is easy without ever actually doing it that's all I am saying. I'd like to see your fat fucking ass running around from table to table for 6-8 hours. And yes when it busy you actually have to run.
Also try treating anyone else with the "I have the money and therefore power over you attitude" and you'll find you don't get anywhere
>>7800578
I think you missed, friend. I didn't say anything about tipping or my father, or anything close to that.
>>7800635
I was close, If they're too dumb to figure out who I was trying to quote then fuck em.
>>7800531
You're paying the restaraunt. The service staff makes the majority of their money via tips. You already knew that though, I hope. If you don't agree with the system, that's fine -- as long as you don't utilize it while not fulfilling your end of the commitment.
>>7800544
I've never met a cook who gave a fuck about FoH tips unless they got a cut. Most don't.
>>7800726
>undercharge for a product
>get mad when people don't tip you to make up for it
Brah, "the system" is fucking retarded and you'd rightfully be called a fucking moron if you tried to implement it in anything but the food industry (which for some reason Ameritards ignore).
>yeah, I'll repair your computer
>just tip me if you think I did a good job soldering the components
>>7800742
I don't disagree that it's a pretty stupid system. But at least for now, that's the way it is. So when you dine in at a restaurant, there is an understanding that you'll tip. When you don't do so, you're using the system to your benefit for cheaper food but not living up to your end of the deal by compensating the service staff. In any other circumstance, that would be considered theft. Nobody is saying that you can't go eat -- just don't accept service that you don't plan on paying for. Take it to go, or eat somewhere that doesn't accept tips.
>>7799018
i realized i was ugly when the only women who talked to me were jews trying to get a bigger tip
>>7798946
the movie was just a power fantasy
>>7795212
atlanta does have a ton of homos
>>7798946
LE titulo es una double entendre haha
>>7800558
Who gives a waiter their shopping list?
>>7799913
>>7800034
>anon's boss, the same guy who beat him up in high school and took his oneitis to senior prom, is threatening to fire him from ChadCorp
>he recently found out his wife has been sleeping with his neighbor Rayquan
>his son doesn't respect him and spends all day in his room playing video games, wasting his adolescence
>like father like son
>the only pleasure he has left in life is the pleasure he gets from sperging out at waiters on a Malaysian rice field tending forum
I really do pity you, anon. I hope your life gets better soon.
>>7800769
If you eat at a restaurant and don't tip you encourage them to switch from the retarded practice of paying workers below minimum wage.
>>7800865
But that's wrong you fucking retard. Restaurants don't give a shit how much you tip the waiter, they're making the same amount of money in the end regardless. Not tipping doesn't make the restaurant less money you downie. All it does is fuck over the waiter.
>>7800873
>All it does is fuck over the waiter.
But that's wrong you fucking retard, if the waiter makes less than minimum wage they have to make up the difference.
>>7800878
Your plan would work if EVERYONE stopped tipping, but everyone is not going to suddenly stop tipping. You, an autist from an obscure image board, will stop tipping, and any waiter who serves you will hate you, and no real change will occur. Waiters will still be paid shit, and you'll still be an autist from an obscure image board.
>>7800887
Meanwhile I'll pay less and the rest of the retards will subsidize my cheaper food. Thanks for tipping for me, faggot.
>>7800544
I'm sure they will miss you (sarcasm) kek
>>7800978
The big difference that I see is that gender surgery (these days, anyway) is consentual. People WANT the surgery. And in many cases they work through an awful lot of hassle just to qualify for the surgery. There's not a lot of people having this done to them without their express will in the matter. People actively seek it out.
I doubt very many people consented to lobotomy or electro-shock.
>>7800862
>video games are a waste of time
I resent that statement
>>7800558
I'd just cook him a batch of unseasoned shrimps.
>>7793933
> get handed this shit
> crumple it up in front of customer before I even finish reading it all
"Alrighty guys welcome to Applebees can I get you started with something to drink we've got 2-for-1 Budweisers right now. "
>>7793933
I tip based on time spent serving me, and quality of the service. $5 per hour, extra $5+10 for quality of service. You don't deserve to make 3x what the cooks make for working 1/3 as hard.
>>7793954
>15%
Bitch, you trippin if you think I'll ever pay more than 10%.
Have your boss your wages, not me.
>>7800260
>Cab Driver drives terribly. Swerves through both lanes depending on emptiness, on his smartphone the entire time, no regard for safety, and keeps playing obnoxious spanish music
>"Wahh i can't believe you only gave me the $7 requested on the meter. Where's my $10 tip, asshole?
>Some Pizza Delivery guy comes delivers your Pizza poorly. Reeks of weed, took a piece of pizza for himself, and showed up an hour after you ordered.
>"What the fuck dude, why did you only give me $10 as per requested on the receipt. Where's my $10 tip?
>Abysmal waitress waits your table terribly. Never checks up on you (if it's not about the check) or tells you if your food is delayed that it's delayed, unenthusiastic, and being a passive-aggressive bitch, and overall delievers subpar service.
>"Excuse me faggot, why did you only give me $30 as per requested by the bill. Where's my $20 tip?
Now imagine, for a moment, that each of those individuals were getting paid less than minimal wage. Do you think they deserve to be rewarded for their actions?
You don't reward the bare minimum of bullshit. You reward exception.
>>7801531
You're a moron. Do some research.
>>7801409
Well go back in the kitchen and tip the cook, you fucking spastic retard. Or just straight up donate to pay for their 37 illegal spic children or rampant habit of snorting shitty cocaine.
>>7793933
but what about an autistic rant about being watched while eating?
>>7801531
When has any of that ever happened to you?
Somewhat related:
I just started a new waiting job at a 100 yr old upscale italian restaurant. I have no prior waiting experience, also I'm a bumbling anxiety ridden autist. Average bill for a 2 seater is 100$.
I need to git gud, and fast. What are some things you want the most in terms of good service/a quality waiter? What bothers you the most in bad service?
Any tips or advice is deeply appreciated. I'm going in tomorrow and I want to step up my game.
>>7801584
give them theyre space and make sure drinks are full, the rest is out of your control
>>7801584
nothing i hate more than sitting around with an empty glass of water
>>7793933
This has to be fake, I refuse to believe a human being could be this autistic.
>>7800493
Yurikuma Arashi warning its Ikuhara kino not some anime flick
I just leave the loose change as tip, If I pay with a cc I tip nothing. I've heard people bitch if you give them change, should I just take my change with me or continue to tip around 32 cents? I used to tip 15-10% but the vast majority of waiters are dicks who provide lousy service so they all get change now.
>>7801745
(You)
>>7800558
Is that a list of things they can't eat?
I work at a little corner bistro, and literally everything we serve has at least one of those things in it. All we would be able to make them would be a bowl of lettuce with onions and olives on it.
>>7793933
+1 you
as a server at Fridays, I don't think my team would like you very much
>>7800862
>I have to make up scenarios to name myself feel better
Sad!
>>7793933
Show them that and the extra grit in your food may be from the kitchen floor.
>>7801870
>All we would be able to make them would be a bowl of lettuce with onions and olives on it.
I had a customer come in and ask us to prepare something that had no root vegetables...
It was a vegetarian restaurant.
>>7799913
Why the fuck is it such a big fucking deal? It's shoving yummy things down your food hole not a banquet for the queen.
>>7800558
>pork bad
>beef is ok
>>7802699
>bacon tastes good
not that hard to understand
>>7802017
That doesn't sound that hard. There's tons of vegetarian shit you can make without root vegetables. Unless you're a chip shop I don't see the big deal.
>>7802017
Why
>>7800558
I am not a doctor but is it physically possible for a person to be allergic to this many things? this just seems like it's from a picky annoying motherfucker.
>Do not serve any ice or straws with our water unless we ask to have it served.
Honestly, if I'm at a restaurant, I expect that to be default for water. Water tastes better when it's ice cold, and if I'm drinking ice water, a straw is preferable because I'd rather not have the ice rub up against my face.
>>7802804
Fuck off shill
>>7793945
One of the options on 4chanx can let you submit everything as image.jgg or just randomly generated 4chan numbers.
It's pretty neat.
>>7802811
I'm not shilling anything.
>>7794098
You give it to the head chef so he can get his daily cardio through laughter.
>>7795212
nigs and boomers also love it.
Besides, who doesn't like a thick steaming juicy cock rubbing on the inside of your throat, warming your entire system with it's intense yet calming radiance?
Only a fag would think that's gay.
>>7802813
Interesting. I have never seen anything submitted as image.jgg
>>7802824
whoops :)
>waiters really think they're people
Want more money? Get a real job.
>but I'm going to college!
I worked construction, a real job making real money, to put myself through college.
>but muh kids!
Why are you trying to support a family on $2/hr? Get a real job.
>>7802839
Oh boy, Grandpa thinks that his life experiences from the 60's are worth anything.
News flash: The price of college has gone up 300%. Inflation has gone up 600%. Wages have not.
>>7801584
Learn the menu inside and out, especially what's good and what goes with what - if you suggest something and the customer loves it, they'll love you. Knowing the wine is important too, but usually pretty fucking hard, if your restaurant is decent you'll probably work with a sommelier who you can refer them to. Get to talking with the chefs and learn a bit about food.
Be super observant, check meals you take out before they leave the pass for shit that's not right. Don't take coffees out if they've got brown spill marks on the side, that shit's gross. Get to messes straight away. I used to work with a guy who could tell what kind of cutlery someone had dropped on the floor by the sound it made, and he'd be at the table in seconds with a clean one.
Keep track of how each table's meal is going so you can get it cleared or the next course started or whatever with the right timing.
Practice carrying two (empty) plates on one arm when you have some free time, it makes running food and clearing a lot faster once you get used to it.
If something goes wrong and you can fix it, fix it asap. If you can't, escalate it to your manager or the kitchen asap.
>>7802856
I'm 25. Wages for your nonjobs aren't going up because they contribute nothing to society. Putting a plate on a table isn't a skill. Any idiot can do that so supply and demand dictate that you are worth $2/hr. I was a frame carpenter and made $25/hr. You know, I'm a teacher now and I actually make less money than when I was a carpenter (but salary comes in handy and I get a couple months to shitpost as much as I want). Probably because building shit takes more skill than learnin' teenyboppers about Shakespeare. The cook in the back has a harder job that requires more skill. The god damn kid in the dish pit is worth more than you. Try and blame the economy, everyone lse is doing better than you.
>>7802856
>i worked construction
Grandpa must have been living large at $27 an hour in 1960. Hell, he wouldnt need college if he earned 4.5 an hour back then because it was still 4.5 times min wage. I bet he saved money by buying a cheaper car, not paying for cable, not getting an iphone, not having a HDTV, not having high speed internet. News flash. 50% of your expenses are luxuries that you think are necessities. All of a sudden, a real degree looks reasonable, but they probably dont teach you the logic to realize that in womens studies.
>>7802886
I still don't have a smartphone, have the same flip phone since I was 18, no cable but I do splurge on the internet, I used to just ride a bike until my wife got pregnant with our first kid. Most of my expenses are my mortgage and my kid, and doctor bills since wifey's knocked up again. No student loans because not only did I work a real job, I had scholarships because I actually studied in high school. Shit, I even got a bullshit degree, and I am still doing better than people my age who just want to work nothing jobs and cry about getting paid what they're worth.
>>7802886
>thinking averages demonstrate anything
>>7802910
>this is how it is most of the time
>but it doesn't fit my world view
>I know! I'll just say "nuh uh"! That oughta show them I deserve more!
>>7802910
>thinks averages dont demonstrate averages
>>7802909
I hear you man, we dont have the opportunity that our parents and grandparents had but we are better off than 99+ percent of all humans who have ever lived. At least those of us in the western world. Will it last through our lives? Im skeptical but Im sick of hearing all the BS from those who think they deserve more than the most prosperous generation in the most prosperous nation in the history of the world. Especially from those who have no degree or used mommy and daddys money to pay for their worthless degree.
>>7802881
>Putting a plate on a table isn't a skill.
>Still thinking this is literally the only thing a server does.
>hurr durr but I worked construction
Oh okay, so all you did was hammer some nails into a plank of wood right? Because that's not something a monkey could do.
>>7802881
>The cook in the back has a harder job that requires more skill
And yet, thanks to tips, cooks often make substantially less money than servers, especially if the place is busy.
>>7802988
This. I was a cook for two years, and the servers routinely went home with twice as much money as us despite their shifts being 8 hours and ours 14.
>>7800433
Lol got this piggy squealing good. Ready to call mommy over to wipe the drool from your bubblin lips?
>>7802988
Been a cook off and on for 8 years. Could never do it full time because the money is such shit. Would work full time warehouse/benefits job and go back to linecooking evenings/weekends for extra cash.
It is really no way to make a living unless you absolutely love it or working up the corporate ladder.
Serving is a tough job but I would boil over watching those lazy cunts stand around waiting for tables and making double the BOH money.
>>7802923
t. triggered waiter that thinks being annoying and faking sincerity is worth being tipped
>>7802795
You can be allergic to as many things as you damn well please.
In all likelihood this person is also a picky prick, but as far as the restaurant is concerned, there's no difference.
