I got invited to go out with some friends. There will be the typical socializing, drinking and dancing.
I don't drink and am wondering what are some "acceptable" non-alcoholic drinks I could order so as not to be the autist drinking water.
Also, how the fuck do I dance?
Soda in a rocks glass with ice and a lime wedge, makes people think you're drinking gin and tonic.
>>7786932
ginger ale
>>7786946
Bingo.
look up videos on youtube if you want to learn to dance. practice in front of the mirror. shirley temple or arnold palmer are the only non alcoholic drinks i can think of.
If you aren't going to drink then don't bother going. You will not have fun, you will not dance, it will be embarrassing and awkward.
>>7786932
soda water with a generous few drops of bitters in it.
>>7786958
Isn't a Shirley Temple a woman's drink?
>>7786973
Shirley Temple is just ginger ale with grenadine. If you need to be a MAN you get a Rob Roy which is coke and grenadine.
Just get a soda water with bitters in a collins glass, that way it will at least LOOK like you're having a cocktail.
>>7786990
This guy sounds like he's experienced.
Order a virgin screwdriver out of earshot of the other folks in the group.
>>7786932
>Also, how the fuck do I dance?
alcohol
>>7786932
>I don't drink and am wondering what are some "acceptable" non-alcoholic drinks I could order so as not to be the autist drinking water.
There's nothing acceptable if people are hearing you order, unless you claim diet reasons/designated driving reasons that I can think of and your friends are celebrities who model or workout for the olympics. You can say "I'm on antibiotics" for such and such and it doesn't mix, sounds better than your psych meds. That won't work every time though. But, for fakeout drinks you need to think twist of lime or lemon in your soda, and that's about it. Getting bloody mary mix with lime is a good fakeout. It's healthy, gives you some gnoshing celery, and some tip you can give a bartender for doctoring up to your hotness specifications. You can order the "virgin" pina colada, frozen and might not cry too much about how sweet it is, or might find some smoothie on a menu, but it invites questions about whatever cool thing you ordered. Hitting up fruit juices like cranberry and soda with lime might look like a sea breeze or something with a name to the casual observer. Red bull is found at most bars, and an excuse about "oh alcohol makes me sleepy when I'm this tired...
Why not just drink one drink, and nurse a second? That's social and reasonable both. It makes you nonjudgemental of others and sober to drive home both. Worry about your invitation for the next time by being rude 100% "no thanks." It's okay to be a lightweight, which is quite normal for only occasional drinkers. Order what tastes good to you or you wish to acquire a taste for and just don't make a big deal out of it. You know your limits and they are light.
Dancing is practice. Watch someone else and do the same, or practice at home from some videos online or take a class.
>>7787042
This guy gets it, senpai.
>>7787009
I've bartended for a number of years, I know things.
Like I know that OP will have a miserable time babysitting all his friends while they get loose and talk to girls and enjoy themselves.
Seriously OP, have a drink and relax. Or don't, but then if you don't also don't sit there quietly and be a buzzkill.
What if I don't even drink soda?
broheim, you got autism written all ove you from worrying about ordering a non-alcoholic drink to knowing how to dance
wear your Star Trek uniform (the nice one) and it will all work out
party on! OP
>>7786932
Just claim you're the designated driver.
>>7786932
Just drink your choice of soda and stop being such a fucking autist. If you don't act like an awkward fuck while ordering and drinking, then people won't care what you drink.
Otherwise just say you're a muslim.
OP's thread is shit, and a little gay, so let me just step in and relay my own clubbing experience.
I'm a standard white guy. Not too dorky, but not exactly "fresh" looking. I went clubbing for the first time about 5 months ago with my nigress wife and some of her friends/ family. Two of the guys there were pretty cool, and normally sociable people. But for whatever reasons, they sat and played Clash of Clans on their phones, sitting on a chair by the wall or leaning the whole night.
I, on the other hand, spent like 80 bucks on drinks, flirted with the walking staff for free shots, and danced, even though I had no idea what I was doing. I had fun, and felt cooler than the black people who I went with.
My point is, don't be a nigger OP. Get out there, drink a little, and have some fun.
As for dancing, a simple two-step with some rythmic leaning should do it. I'm assuming your a man; this is all that is expected of you.
Sprite with a lime wedge and say it's vodka lime.
/fit/ here. Shit works every time.
Dumbass tries to steal your drink just smack a bitch.
>how do i pretend to drink
>how do i pretend to socialise
>how do i pretend to dance
>how do i pretend to pretend
Are you a robot?
>>7786932
The fact that you are trying to avoid looking like an autist means you are going to look and act like an autist no matter what you drink. Good luck though
>>7787128
This post is painfully accurate OP.
how do you plan on responding?
>>7786932
>>7787128
not a robot, but she might be a replicant, Nexus 6, which means she doesn't have time to fuck around with niceties here, mes amies
>>7787065
W-which one's the nice one?
>>7787059
This. I'm borderline autistic when sober but alcohol makes me party hard
Hangover sucks tho
>>7787204
If you get a hangover you're doing it wrong. Drink a little less or space drinks out over more time. Keep yourself hydrated with glasses of ice water between drinks too. If you somehow have a hangover after all that, drink black coffee and ice water woth a breakfast high in fat, protein, and carbs.
>>7787215
well thank god the prick killed himself when you were still pretty young
probably a good call on the drinking
>>7786932
light beer
>>7787241
same alcohol content.
>>7787215
Boo fucking hoo. Does your alcoholic dad also make you incapable of having fun sober? Does his ghost stalk you and tell you people judge you for not drinking at a club?
>>7786932
If you're really worried about it, offer to be the designated driver. No one will bat an eye that you're not drinking. If you're trying to fly under the radar, order cranberry and soda or just get a coke.
>>7786932
Stop being such a bitch and have a drink with your friends. If you can't do that, don't go out with them you social autist
>>7787111
>standard white guy
>ingress wife
got some bad news for you anon
>>7788131
>ingress
There are people who still play that?
>>7788066
>call him out for being the faggot he is because he's self conscious about what people will think of him not drinking
>instead of just having fun sober
>hurr durr you people are the worst
>>7786932
I had to give up boozing, OP.
Can't help you on the dancing part but for drinks you can get away with:
-Roy Rogers
-Clear soda (club for ultimate realism) with ice and lime wedge
-Michelangelo
-Gunner if you like ginger beer
-Muddy Water if you need to puke
Or just ask the bartender if they can make something up on the spot that is virgin and tasty just for you. Most bartenders (especially at your classier joints) will be quite happy to make something for you custom and won't give a fuck if you're not boozing--makes their lives easier.
Just don't Jew on a tip and your friends won't notice you.
>>7787081
>Otherwise just say you're a muslim
Now's not the right time.
Club soda with lime is what I do. Drink it slow.
>>7786932
rootbeer.
how do you dance? become black.
>>7786932
If you don't feel comfortable with your friends finding out such a trivial bit of information about you, then you are either a baby bitch or your friends are cunts or both.
>>7787235
Or just not drink and dont have to deal with any of that.
>>7788131
If those jungle-bunnies are going to keep stealing white women, I'm going to insist on us taking some of theirs. Plus, my heredity has nothing to do with my sex life.
>>7786932
>what are some "acceptable" non-alcoholic drinks
Literally whatever you want. If the crowd you hang around is so anal about you not drinking alcohol, screw them.
Quite a lot of my friends don't drink alcohol for numerous reasons and not even once was this a big deal, be it a private gathering or a bar/club/restaurant/whatever.
>>7786958
Arnold Palmer has alcohol, though.
>>7790208
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xrne2-gOoqU
>>7790208
I thought an Arnold Palmer was simply half iced tea and half lemonade?
>>7790223
it is plus half gin
>>7788066
>social autists considering social autism as 'being responsible'
>>7790223
It is. The other joker doesn't know what he's talking about.
>>7790229
No.
>>7790208
An Arnold Palmer is iced tea and lemonade. That's all.
>>7790241
you forgot the half gin
>>7790245
Incorrect.
You know it's socially acceptable to go on a night out and not drink right?
Drunk people don't even realise you're sober.
Drink whatever you want, but I'd say have an energy drink or two to keep your energy levels up, cause when you're tired and sober, that's when you start becoming a killjoy
>>7787059
He might be the DD
ie the sacrificial lamb cause his friends are too fucking cheap to get a cab and probably only invited him because they knew he was a loser and could make him DD for them
>>7787065
DESU a nice star trek uniform that doesn't look like pajama shit would be a nice convo starter in a bar.
>>7788168
how do I get this fucking shit off my phone I installed it on a lark one day and it keeps sending me fucking notifications
>>7786990
That's a Roy rogers, Ron Roy is alcoholic
It's an "autist overthinks everything" episode. Drink whatever you want
Also everyone's family probably has alcoholism in it but not everyone is autistic enough to think that that means they should never ever drink.
>>7788066
Another non-drinker here. Being out with people that are drunk while you're sober is not fun at all. I'm an ex alcoholic/drug addict, and now that I'm sober, I'm a complete shut in loner because literally everyone I work with or know drinks and being around drunks sober is the fucking worst.
>>7790404
Why is it not fun?
>>7790439
Drunk people act fucking stupid.
I was a cunt who didn't drink once.
Pointless. A beer or two doesn't seriously impair your faculties outside driving but still loosens your tongue if you're the sort that needs it. Just don't overdo it.
>>7790440
Drunk people act fun. Have you tried not letting it bother you?
>>7790479
>it's fun when a faggot bro tries to fight you for literally no reason
>>7790470
I had part of a half pint at CatBar and it slurred my speech a little and I didn't like it so I haven't drank since. I've also glossed over some research about the carcinogens that form as soon as alcohol touches the tongue. It's just not worth it to me.
>>7786932
Take a group dance class. Hip hop can apply to most "club" dancing and it's usually filled with cute girls. You start to pick up moves and apply them when they're out. It's also a nice light workout.
>>7790500
>not getting the upper hand and turning it into sex
>>7790509
Enjoy being accused of rape for having sex with a drunk chick while sober.
>>7790513
>banging chicks
What are you, gay?
>>7790504
Lol what? Are you the size of a child?
>>7786932
O'doul's bra
>How do I dance
Alcohol bra
Why is it so shameful just to tell people you dont drink alcohol?
If anything people will respect you more for sticking to your principles in a place that all but demands you binge drink.
>>7790781
Yes.
>>7790789
The reality is no one cares as long as you don't harp on how great you are for abstaining/how bad they are for drinking or act like a stick in the mud
