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Gif recipes/"tasty" thread
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You are currently reading a thread in /ck/ - Food & Cooking

Thread replies: 255
Thread images: 92
File: UrdWqdj.webm (2 MB, 362x366) Image search: [Google]
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Post the worst you can find and lets all be dumbstruck by their bullshit together
>>
>gif recipes
>posts webm
>>
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>>7785977
>Global Rule 16
>>>/wsr/
Delete this thread or I will have no choice but to report you.
Thanks
>>
>>7785997
this isnt a request thread ya mook
fuck off back into the hole you crawled out of
>>
>>7785977
>using shitty bread
>using shitty bread crust for croutons
>flattening the bread before trying to get it to soak up a shitty custard
>using a cast iron
>decorating it with powdered sugar to hide the burned shitty bread
>>
>>7786002
Not him but it clearly is a request.
>>
>>7786011
>>7785997
You've obviously never seen an actual request thread on those boards if you think this is a request thread
By your logic pretty much every thread on this board would be a request thread
>>
>>7786035
>being this new
>>
>>7786002
The problem with threads like this is that OP will clearly post a (vaguely) interesting and relevant item.
Approximately an hour later the thread will be a shit blizzard of poorly executed jack webm bullshit.
The novelty of jack wore off long ago but some fucking tryhards keep pushing it. It's sad.
>>
>>7786046
Even if I said no jack though people would ignore it
I started a webm thread like a week ago with those specifications and soon enough it was flooded with jack
>>
>>7786055
Pro-tip: Don't start webm threads.
>>
>>7786055
I even see them in /tv/ webm threads sometimes, it's getting out of hand
>>
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>>7785997
god fuck off dude
>>
>>7785977
why not just make a crepe? You use nearly all the same ingredients. I dont even know anymore.
>>
>>7786072
Punctuate much?
>>
>>7785977
This looks pretty tasty. Impractical, but tasty.
>>
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>>7786057
>>7786055
>>7786046
>>7786070

Whiny faggots like you love Ja/ck/
>>
>>7786098
Do me a favor and dump all of your Jack webms?
>>
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>>7786100
No I'm going to bed
>>
>>7785977
>sweet bread
>sweet peanut butter
>sweet banana
>adds sugar to the egg mix
>tops with powdered sugar
>then dunks in syrup

How do you want your diabetes senpai?
>>
>>7786218
tasty pls
>>
>>7786075

>why not just make a crepe? You use nearly all the same ingredients.

...because you don't want a crepe. how is this a pertinent question? why not just make satay sauce? why not make banana cream pie?
>>
>>7786218

>multiple components with the same thing equates to eating too much of the same thing

you're the same kind of faggot who rails against carb on carb
>>
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Not a gif but gross facebook bullshit
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>>7786285

that fucking grossly suboptimal cooking method
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>>7786113
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>>7786285
looks pretty yummy
>>
>>7785977
>bread is burnt
sasuga tasty
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>>7786285
¿ramen noodles is lasagna?
>>
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JYAKKU
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>>7788590

the oil isnt even hot lmao

can anyone legit tell if the guy is a master troll or just someone so dumb that fuckups every fucking thing he does.
>>
>>7788659
He doesn't know how bad he is.
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>>7788590
Not hot enough
It just sits in the oil looking like a wiener
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>>7788590
I made most of these Jack webms and even I'm getting tired of the same rehashed shit. I keep taking this surveymonkey and voting for more Lazy Man recipes but there is only so much I can do
>>
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>>7788800
Me too, I also voted for more playing with your food.
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>>7785977
If thisnshit done properly it would be great, I need to buy some bananas
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>>7788590
>the clearly ignored "max fill" line
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>>7788801
i don't know how to cook at all but good god that made me angry
>>
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>>7788873
Did it now?
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>>7786329
someone said he had a stroke and i choose to believe them
>>
>>7788590
is he dipping a frozen corn dog into more batter and then dropping it into cold oil??

i don't understand
>>
>>7785977
Jesus Christ, just make a fucking crepe. You're three quarters of the way there, but you're substituting flour for flattened, burnt bread.

Why would you put in so much effort to cook garbage?
>>
>>7788801
o m g

but then wheat thins tho...gross
>>
>>7788906
it's a complex form of suicide
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>>7788920
they turned out well
>>
>>7788801
to be fair that brand always has a layer of water on top. never tried pouring it out but it probably would do that
>>
>>7788923
i just watched the whole video, but he made another where he figured it out. except i don't think those dogs would cook all the way that fast, shouldn't they be par cooked first?

>>7788935
>not making your own salsa
senpai i don't....
>>
>>7785997
Are you unhappy with food
>>
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>>7786098
I love Jack webms for two reasons:
1) They make me feel better about my cooking skills.
2) I cannot bring myself to actually watch a full video of his. I just want the horrifying highlights.
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>>7789011
So this is a parody, right?
>>
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>>7789034
No, and he actually calls it garbage stew. He takes all of the stuff that is in his pantry/fridge that is close to its expiration date, and puts it all in one pot.
>>
>>7789034
Poe's Law is in full effect, but after seeing a few of his videos I have to conclude that he is a well-meaning absolute moron. Despite seemingly not possessing even an ounce of cooking skills, he has his own line of sauces and seasonings.
He reminds me a lot of my father, which leads me to suspect that he suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder.
>>
>>7789041
>>7789063

I didn't realise this was still jack, I thought it was a parody of him. I ended up watching some of his videos a few months ago before I frequented this board and ended up scratching my head...he is well meaning, and reasonably serious but like you say, just cannot cook.

The beer in THAT stew though....fuck
>>
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>>7789090
Yeah
>>
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The BEST Homemade Italian Sauce You Will Ever Taste
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>>7789011
Christ, this bit is even worse with sounds

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IrFYRNtD2I
>>
>>7789093
do you have the ham hock webm?
>>
>>7789011
he keeps his crock pot in the GARAGE!
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Era4tENWn4Q
Wait this motherfucker put pepper in his eye to cure his pink eye?!
I need to catch up on my Cucking with Jack shit
>>
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>>7789106
Sadly, I don't.
>>
>>7789099
this really hurts to watch, even i know she's breaking every basic rule not to mention common sense
>>
>>7789011
He shouldn't have added the lime for fucks sake
>>
I guess the consensus is that there's nothing worse than Jack.
>>
>>7789124
>for fck's sake
This is a blue board. Use "ffs," ffs.
>>
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>>7789099
A lot of people hate on this video for how she uses the oil, but really it's not a bad technique. Scott Conant uses it, and claims to have gotten his recipe from a small village in Italy. The idea is to flavor the olive oil with aromatics, because fat carries flavors better than, say, tomatoes. You then strain the oil into the tomato sauce.
What this woman does wrong is using a fuck load too much oil. I think her recipe called for 1/4 cup or something, but she admittedly doesn't measure anything and ends up with what looks like at least a cup.

TL;DR: flavoring oil the way she does is a valid technique, but she is a dumbie and uses far too much oil.
>>
>>7789106
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxqZMVhtafc

This one?

I am laughing so hard, he knew it was too big, did it anyway, fucked it up and went to the store to buy more hahahahahahaah
>>
>>7789124
The lime juice is the least terrible thing about that trainwreck.
>>
>>7789131
Oh, i'm sorry i didn't realise it meant we couldn't swear.
>>
>>7789140
Agreed, bit I know how much worse it made the entire thing...the most relatable.
Bloody Oliver made everyone think that lime juice is good on everything!!
>>
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>>7789139
jack has gotten really wide recently, hasn't he
>>
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>>7789111
>>
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>>7789152
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>>7789219
Is that supposed to be pie? What did he do to the poor thing?
>>
>>7789099
>knife is so blunt her fingers are actually in no danger at all
>>
>>7789229
Lazy Man's Peach Cobbler

I guess he made it on tv too, to boot
>>
>>7789041
what the actual fuck is this
>>
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>>7789219
>>
>>7786218

There is no scientific study linking carb consumption to diabetes similar to how there has never been proof that eggs are bad for your cholesterol
>>
>>7789236
Party Cheese salad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf_W7As6xbk
>>
>>7789239
this is a psychological torture video
>>
>>7789245
oh my god why

how did this get made the first time it was ever made

tell me why, god
>>
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>>7789011
I can't even fucking imagine what this tastes like
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>>7789239
Ah, Jack's first encounter with non-newtonian fluids. I wish I could see his face as he struggles to comprehend what is happening to him.
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>>7788875

>dat raw fleck that sticks to the knife
>>
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>>7789239
some cringe for the brothers across the pond
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>>7785977
Has Jack ever made anything that turned out well. Like was actually tasty.
>>
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>>7789275
Oh fuck, I thought they were just some weird american thing until I read the title. Please don't tell me thats his attempt at Yorkshire pudding.
>>
>>7789275
At one point he looked at those puddings, spent a moment in quiet contemplation, and then concluded that they were good enough to show the world.
There is no god.
>>
>>7789280
I have seen him make basic stuff like mac and cheese that looks ok. If he sticks to something really safe and familiar to him, he might not make an abomination. The crazy stuff is when he goes off of some weird family recipe, or tries to make something he has never made before (he insists on making it the first time live on camera).
>>
>>7789280
I don't know about taste, but the majority of his International Dishes series from before they moved to Tennessee seemed alright. He took care in getting fresh or relatively fresh ingredients and seemed eager to try something outside of his comfort zone, and seems to at least try to cook it the right way (and not a lazy man's way).

https://youtu.be/Fm7F9I3qzoA?list=PL2MtWCGs1N0SDBLK_qkOgNYcBjssh05Df

it's actually kind of a shame he stopped trying international dishes for whatever reason. the family recipe deep south foods he's doing now is getting boring.


>>7789282
yeah that's his first attempt, he remade them and they turned out better iirc
>>
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Jack threads are /ck/, everything else is just cover to distract the mods.
His run of the mill incompetent but confidently optimistic expectations should remind us all of where we were when we were hungry for food and cooking, but not yet competent.
patron saint of genocide and potential
>>
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>>7789434
>>
>>7789434
People really think that?
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>>7789364
this dude is so fucking dumb that he doesn't even consider "hmm maybe I should pour the other direction so I don't smear whatever the fuck this shit is all over the bottom of my pan *and* fuck up the coating at the same time".
>>
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>>7789152
Is that some fried meat put in a slow cooker?
>>
>>7788659
Who is he
>>
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>>7789113
WHAT THE MAD HELL IS THIS
>>
Do you think Jack will announce his inevitable divorce?

Or will he not acknowledge it and we'll have to piece things together over time?
>>
>>7785977
As much hate as "Tasty" facebook videos get, they're miles ahead of all of the competitors. At least Tasty recipes look ok and are visually appealing generally. The copycats always look bad and I don't think I've ever seen a good video from "TipHero" or "TastesGood" or whatever the fuck they're called, and I see a lot of these videos because I have a lot of facebook friends that are "foodies".
>>
>>7785977
A lot of the tasty recipes would actually be okay if they just changed one or two steps
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>>7788590
>jack_illustrating_jack_jr's_conception.webm
>>
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>>7789111
he didnt wear cuck glasses and got negro semen in his eyes?
>>
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>>7789275
notice that he spent some time and found a pic of proper pudding in top left corner
>>
>>7790214
This is not a jack thread, faggot.
>>
>>7790218

I have a few decent ones of tasty in mp4 format.
Let me check how to upload them.
>>
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>>7790264
beautiful
>>
>>7790256
Have you looked at the thread? It obviously is now.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WRC7HXBJpU
>>
>>7785977
>sugar
Disgusting
It already had enough sugars
>>
>>7790264
this liteally had me in tears
>>
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>>7790251
HE DOESN'T BLINK
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>>
Does anyone remember the video where he used a piece of brisket that had been sitting in his freezer for a year in chili for a competition then got salty at the judges for not seeing his genius?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrcW5rqFUn0
>>
>>7790311
was this before or after he switched churches?
>>
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Witness the unique food delivery mechanism of the American
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>>7785997
>implying that wasn't NSFW content

Did you even SEE that webm?
>>
>>7790318
God, I wish that pizza was me ;__;

I want Jack to jack me
>>
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>>7790318
Ever notice how fat slobs spoon food directly onto their tongue when they eat?
>>
>>7786113
Why would he even try this? He knows its beer, right? What video is this from, he must have explication.
>>
>>7789230
blunt! that's the word i've been looking for
>>
>>7790343
you know that some countrys have twist-off beer bottles right?
>>
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>>7790331
Yeah

>>7790355
They do, but it's a fancy craft IPA. Those never come in twist offs tbqfh
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>>7789041
I have seen these webms countless times but they never get any easier to watch

god this is like a train wreck. If there is a hell it must be reincarnated into being part of his family
>>
>>7789132
for fucks sake, this is the only board that seemingly played the devils advocate way too much
>>
>>7790364
Lagunitas is not a fancy craft beer. It is also twist off
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>>7790355
It's a lagunitas bottle. Of course it's not twist off. Most beer bottles aren't twist off, one shouldn't assume that they are.
>>
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>>7789367
I miss joey threads
>>
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>>7790364
>>7790318
IM CRINGING WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED TO STICK OUT YOUR TONGUE ITS SO FUCKING GROSS I WANNA BARF IT'S GOING IN YOUR MOUTH ALREADY HOLY FUCK CAN'T YOU JUST WAIT YOU FAT DISGUSTING BLOBS
>>
>>7789132
It's way more easy to use some oil and maybe some butter and then add garlic and onions that doing that shit that will probably make you feel bad
>>
>>7790393
Wow, you've pinpointed what exactly is so disgusting about him. Now I can't unsee it. Also his fat fuck breathing in all his videos when the camera is less than a foot away from him.
>>
>>7790378
what even happened to the joey threads?
>>
>>7789275
TRIGGERED
>>
>>7786319
It's to Show all the ingrediens in one picture, i assume they assume you're not stupid enough to follow the 'recipe' exactly as shown.
>>
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>>7790393
>>
>>7790447
what's wrong with taking just one bite? He looks like a hungry badger
>>
>>7790431
Anally rustled modes actively banned them because they dont like em even then it does not violate any rules.
>>
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>>7790274
> It's a "Jack cook something from a box episode".
>>
>>7790459
so let's start making them again
fuck the mods
>>
>>7785977
holy fuck the amount of sugar in this thing
>>
>>7788590
THAT FUCKING COLD OIL
ree
>>
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>>7790264
Motherfuckers on yesterday telling me
>theres no blood in meat anon.

WHAT IS IT I SEE AT 0:16 THEN?!
>>
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>>7790657
juices anon, those are juices

beautiful
>>
>>7790318
This guy basically has a degree in eating food and nodding.
>>
>>7790251
>Clear glasses
>"Where is everybody?"

Humour, ladies and gentlemen.
>>
>>7785977
That was a webm you dingus.
>>
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>>7790364
She learned everything she knows about eating from Master Jack. I'm surprised she doesn't show us how to unhinge her jaw and have her eyes roll into the back of her head for big princess bites.
>>
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>>7790677
jack's influence is strong
>>
>>7790680
There is actually a mixed up Jack Semen Sample in that spoon of peanut butter, hence the sour face at the end.

Jack sure loves playing little pranks on his family from time to time. It's all in good fun, though. :) Praise the lord.
>>
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>>7788590
Even crows understand displacement.
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>>7790719
You lose a penny if you buy 2, but save a penny if you buy 6
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>>7790318
>>
>>7790745
is jack lowkey antisemite?
>>
>>7790765
Stobbit.
>>
>>7790745
Actually you lose 2 pennies if you buy 6.
>>
>>7790719
>1
5.46*1
$5.46
>2
5.46*2
$10.92
>3
5.46*3
$16.38
>4
5.46*4
$21.84
>5
5.46*5
$27.30
>6
5.46*6
$32.76
>>
>>7790264
I'm laughing tears. It's too much to take.
>>
>>7790657
water
blood tastes like copper. you've tasted your own blood, right? that's what cow blood tastes like
>>
>>7790264
this is why I come to this shit board
>>
>>7789140
I lost it at the can of cream corn.
>>
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why doesn't jack just get a fucking cooking book
>>
>>7790447
>Those fingers

What the fuck, they're so disproportionate.
>>
>>7785997
Fuck back seat mods everywhere, and especially you
>>
>>7788590
>all that effort and mess
>Just drops the fucker in cold oil, stick & all


Fucking lol. I love it when people don't think shit through
>>
>>7790815
Why do all of this fat fuck's recipes include either an entire block of cream cheese or 2 ladles full of mayo?
>>
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>>7789011
>>
Maybe the best thing about Jack is all the stupid gimmicky shit he uses, like the slap chop and those stupid utensils with the tumor on the side that helps them hold on the pots.
>>
>>7789011
Its feels like he bough all his ingredients except the beer on the discount rack at the dollar store. Or he was just trying to clean out his entire pantry in one meal.
>>
>>7789041
As a person who takes pride in making beef stew, from a recipe i proudly stole from Ireland, i hate everything this man stands for.
>>
I bugs me how much of a slob jack is
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>>7790393
it's so that the food can rest briefly on your palette before mastication.
It's some haute cuisine fanciness
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>>7789093
>Mayo and vinegar with baked beans
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Jacks cooking reminds me of our nursing home cook. So.ehow even he fucks up what cannot be fucked up.

Try stroganoff without sour cream for instance. Neatballs looks

Baked chicken that looks like boiled chicken.

Run short of a side order and asks us to substitute.

He even looks like Jack.
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>>7790344
Blunt! Thats what I've been looking for! Where the fuck did i put mine?
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Jack also has pleb friends
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>>7790871
it really illustrates how a lot of white trash cooking is just taking a smattering of processed foods and putting them in the same place
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>>7790871
>>
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>>7790864
>Neatballs
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>>7790858
>"eats" food
>nods
>says "pretty good"

Excellent review. Very much worth the time and bandwidth to upload that to the internet. Why doesn't she stick her arms out like big daddy Jack does?
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>>7790871
Jesus christ, shit like this is why i hate food and eating
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>>7789275
"Yorkshire pucks"
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>>7790871
>Dunking the pan in the salsa.
>Adding that many olives which she probably picked off later.

Why do people who cannot cook always cook by combining everything?
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>>7789239
>Cornstarch & water versus an idiot with no understanding of physics or cooking

We all win.
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>>7785997
You're like that shithead snitch on the playground in elementary school who got bullied and totally deserved it.
Go get swirlied faggot.
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>>7790852
>Or he was just trying to clean out his entire pantry in one meal.
That is exactly and explicitly what he said he was trying to do in the video. Everything he put in was about to go out of date.
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>>7789261
The title kind of gives It away.
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>>7788875
>knife on ceramic plate
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>>7789177
How does this guy have such nice hands? I don't get it.
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>>7788907
If you don't understand the difference a crepe and french toast you are literally retarded.
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>>7790657
It's called myoglobin. All the blood in meat is drained before it reaches your butcher.
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>>7790871
>lets just mix a bunch of shit in a pan and throw it in the oven
She probably called this a casserole something or another. This is why I fucking hate casseroles and everything they stand for.
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>>7789109
So what?
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Don't forget to help ja/ck/

surveymonkey com/r/WDNKNQY
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>>7785989
i have seem some really long ass gifs and there is no video controll to skip ahead or rewind

it is the worst shit and should not be happening in CURRENT YEAR
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>>7785997
I request that you go fuck off
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>>7789099
Related: thread from /tg/ where some idiots fail to make pierogis. Pretty funny desu.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20154353/
>>
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>visit Jack's Youtube chanel.
>Most recent video is him begging for viewers to take a survey
>herewego.page
>name: Adolf Dindu
>answer every question so as to encourage him to cease making videos
>>
>>7790871
>two bags of cheese
>T W O
>BAGS OF CHEESE
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>>7790815
>think to myself oh this doesnt look that bad, sugary as fuck but it might come out-
>after the oven shot
>cant even get it out of the goddamn pan properly
>that whip cream
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>>7790815
what is the point of this recipe what the fuck it's just butter sugar and eggs that these incompetent fucks can't even place on a plate without fucking up
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>>7789922
wish I had some tongs for this job
>>
>>7791137
That shit looks MAD overcooked. I dunno about you, but when I cook a cake, I'm not looking for a volcanic ash consistency.
>>
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>>7790815
>punching the eggs to crack them
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>>7790815
YOU CAN SEE HIM TRYING TO UNSTICK THE FLOUR FROM HIS GUMS AT THE END. AND HE JUST FUCKING NODS AND SMILES THROUGH IT.
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>>7790274
>literally just Rice-a-Roni with pork chops thrown into it
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>>7790274
Is he in-front of a green screen of his kitchen in his own kitchen? The hell?
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>>7790274
>pours water into hot pan
>oh yeah look at that sizzle, beautiful
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>>7790274
oh god he just boiled them in that rice thing
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If the recipes on the back of canned goods could be relayed in video format I like to think Ja/ck/ and his posse would produce them.
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>>7785977
Has this turned into a jack thread yet?
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>>7791274
This was probably intended to be.
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>>7789104
Jesus fuck, when he started to describe the ingredients i felt this weird sense of dread.
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>>7790871
After eating that you cant take a shit for a whole year
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>>7791317
what the fuck is that
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Has anyone tried those "BEST" sauces?
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>>7790373
Almost all of their beers that I have had are not twist off. I have a Lucky 13 and a little sumpin in my fridge and neither are twist off.
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>>7790858
What is with him and his fat fuck wife sticking their tongue a mile out of their mouth.
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>>7789177
JUST
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>>7790274
>Long thin and green, with a nice jack off motion
He does that too well.
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>>7791357
some have and described it as sweet
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>>7791364
I loathe looking at Jack, yet I always want to see more.
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>>7789219
video?
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>>7789131
it fucking doesn't you're just replying to a shithead
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>>7791458
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjTRxJqfTgk
>>
>>7791467
I love his unjust indignation, food network really should let him on because he's the hero we deserve
>>
when ja/ck/ will evolve to cuisine moleculaire?
>>
jack discusses a couple of the results of the survey

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFK8inzO8NI
>>
>>7791499
>2016
>still using charcoal bbq
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>>7790255
>and when your mom is done carving the me you would suck up all the juice
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>>7785997
>I will have no choice but to report you
read global rule 7 :^)
>>
>>7785997
Since nobody mentioned it, I feel obligated to point out you can't delete threads anymore
>>
>>7791552
delete this post please, I don't want to have to involve moderators
>>
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>>7786098
Whiny faggots, huh?
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>>7786113
Why would you get olive oil from World Market? Do you enjoy paying almost twice for something that be obtained at a regular store?
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>>7785977
As soon as I saw this thread I knew it would turn into people posting Jack videos. Why can't he just die of salmonella already?
>mfw some poor nurse would throw their back trying to move him
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>>7789275
wtf, thats nothing like Yorkshire pudding
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>>7785977
I really don't get it, what makes tasty so bad?

I know that I'm a huge normalfag and I don't have any cooking knowledge, so I would appreciate it if somebody would enlighten me.
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>>7791722
If it means anything I only watch tasty for their disgusting cheese overload junk fatty foods as a kind of /ck/ cringe thread substitute
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>>7789024
underrated

same
>>
Yes, yes I do enjoy ja/ck/. I was wrong.
>>
>>7791722
Its bad because every recipe is a shit ton of some form of cheese or sugar


Most of their recieps would be good beginner recipes if they removed all the sugar/cheese to be hoenst
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>>7791818
>>7791722
It's like sandra lee's semi homemade in 10 second formats.

Sure, the end result might look great on pinterest or wherever, but whoever makes these things uses a lot of prepackaged ingredients and not a lot of technique. Meats are never browned, vegetables will end up overcooked, etc. for an end result that would have tasted a lot better with a little more effort.
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>>7790871
>dumping everything into the same spot
>those fucking unhygenic nails
>bagged pre-grated cheese
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>>7785977
Do these threads always just devolve into jack threads?
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>>7791915
Not always, about half the time.
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>>7790251
What an infuriating cunt

someone king hit this fuckwit
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>>7789236
>>7789260

Back in the day only fancy rich people had refrigerators.

So when they wanted to show off they would make things that could be made in a fridge, like jello based dishes.

This was often accentuated by forming the jello into sculpture and displaying it as a center-piece.
Thread replies: 255
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