Ok guys, I need some help.
Now I love beans, don't get me wrong, but for the life of me I CANNOT seem to do it so that they don't cause me SEVERE gas and bloating.
I have tried overnight soaking before cooking along with the addition of salt, and have even gone so far as to inoculate them with a pro-biotic, all to no avail.
I have heard epazote may be a decent choice for reducing gas as a carminative, but I honestly have no ideas.
Has anyone found a way to do it? If so please share. My relationship with beans is on the line here :P
>>7562038
i find that it's sufficient to touch my vagina before preparing the beans. the bacterial culture mellows out the beans effects.
just get used to it, nothin nicer than cookin a pot of beans without soaking them on saturday nite and sittin around ripping HUGE farts and smellin em till the wee hours of the morning, chuckling softly each time :D
The length of the soak makes a difference for me, as well as the number of rinses
A 2 day soak with 3 full drain and rinse cycles helps quite a bit
Try eating your beans with yogurt
xD
If you blend them and eat them as porridge you don't get gassy.
activated charcoal/carbon
STRONGLY ABSORB GASES
I eat large amounts of beans just so I can fart on my wife
>>7562038
After the soak do you rinse the beans until the water runs clear?
cook them with a bay leaf or two
also this
>>7562308
2 days seems a little excessive, but it can't hurt to rinse and change the water often
Why bother eating them if you can't fart up a storm, similar to idiots that drink decaf.
On a side note, get a pressure cooker, it'll bring the gaseous fumes down quite a bit. I think pressure cookers break down the sugar/starch that causes gas, forgot the exact mechanism of action that does this. You can also quick soak beans with a pressure cooker, usually 2 minutes on high pressure for most beans, and you dump out the water, then cook them in super fast time in the cooker.
>>7562308
Soaking beans for 2 or more days is madness.
>>7562038
LONDON
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stick with pinto beans, give them a long soak at room temp, around 12 hours, rinse, then pressure cook for 5 minutes, and then rinse and store in the fridge.
They aren't that gassy this way. Almost feels like normal farting to me. And always carefully inspect the beans for rocks.
Canned beans are a lot less flatulence-promoting because the fermentable fibers are water-soluble and leech into the water over months while in the can.
If you want to make them fresh, you should boil them before soaking to break down the cell walls, otherwise not all of the fiber can move into the water. Soaking without boiling is not too effective.
Also note that flatulence and flavor are basically linearly correlated, so your more tolerable beans will never taste as good.
BEANS, BEANS, THE MUSICAL FRUIT
>>7563349
I'm the guy who farts on his wife from above. Made a huge batch of minestrone soup on the weekend, it was full of red kidney, pinto beans, chick peas and red lentils.
The farts have been fantastic. It's even better because she's heavily pregnant and it's difficult for her to get up and move quickly.
Soon I won't only be able to fart on her, but her newborn son too
>>7563421
>Heavily pregnant
I'm in fucking tears, man.
>>7563430
Farthing on someone who is 36 weeks pregnant is funnier than farting on an obese woman, at least the fatty can roll away in a hurry. A pregnant woman has to be careful when she gets up and moves. It's fucking great man.
Best part of being an expecting father.
>>7563421
I do fart on my wife too. The best thing is when your farts smell so bad that if kept concentrating under the bed blankets can wake up her while she sleeps due to the strength of the stench. She gets really mad though.
>>7563768
Very noice
t. Aussie
>>7562038
>>7562076
was there for that thread still laughing
>>7562038
Eat more fiber over a long period of time and you'll find your gas issue will decrease.
It's really easy. soak overnight. bring to boil. take off heat, let sit one hour. drain that water, then add fresh water and continue until done. these beans are clean and gas free. search "gentle beans" if you don't believe me.
pre soak and pressure cook
i can mine .. mild farts
>>7562038
Why would you think that soaking beans would stop your body producing farts? Do you understand what farts actually are?
>>7565668
(You)
>>7562038
I get extreme stomach pains for days after eating beans. Am I allergic?
>>7562038
Kombu
Eat beans more often and you won't get bad gas. You could also try Beano but in my experience it just concentrated my farts into chemical warfare grade farts.
>>7562038
I'd come to your house and sniff your farts under the bed sheets.
>>7563421
>your wife's son
>>7566024
yeah you should PROBABLY a) not eat beans and b) go see a fucking doctor
>>7566024
Go see a doctor tomorrow, no joke. You may have a bowel obstruction or diverticulitis.
