If i kill a deer with my car how fast should i start cutting it up until it becomes rotten/poisonous?
Are there articles which can show me how to cut up a deer into pieces?
>>7445256
>lel what is poaching?
it may be illegal to do so in your state
>>7445256
I'd say a few hours just like any other game kill
Don't get caught because the game warden will fuck you up bro
>>7445256
Depends. If you rupture it's intestines it's bad right off the hood. If not you probably have a couple hours til it starts getting picked apart by scavengers
I thought this poaching shit just applied in Germany.
Is this a universal law?
>>7445256
The deer will probably fuck up your car if you don't have a big SUV or some shit so I wouldn't bother
I got a buddy whose brother is a state trooper. Just had some roadkill elk from him for lunch.
>>7445364
My driving instructor always told me to hit the gas instead of trying to evade. The deer is softer than your car. And insurance will pay anyway.
>>7445256
Are you asking this because you accidentally hit a deer already or is it something you're planning on doing? Because if you have enough money to deal with the damage that's going to do to your car you have enough to just go out and buy some deer meat. As another anon said, there's a bunch of body parts filled with fluid and if they burst the meat is already ruined.
Also, as far as I know if you hit an animal like a deer you have to leave it in the road. But any cars that pass can legally take it. I'm in the UK so that might not be the same everywhere.
>>7445378
I'm pretty sure that is for the safety of other road users, not your own vehicle. Hitting a deer with enough force to kill it will seriously fuck up your car, people have died doing that.
You should cut out its guts and drain as much blood as possible before backing it in your car, that should help.
>>7445535
so drive around the fucking block and pick it up
>>7445256
I read that in some places the police have a list of people to call and they come and pick it up for meat if it isn't ruined
>>7445575
Genius.
>>7445535
>you can't take roadkill
>mfw other drivers can
>oi mum what's for brekkist and does it have tyre tracks?
>squirrel and blood pudding ya cheeky cunt get stuck in
>English cooking explained
in burgerland to posses a deer carcass you must have a hunting license and if required in your area a deer tag which is basically a per-deer tax
>source: know a guy as dumb as OP, got busted with carcass by F&G and was royally fucked
avoid puncturing the poison sacs while dressing, else the meat will become tainted from its venom
In my state, you hit an animal, you call the police, then they send out a hunter to evaluate and butcher the roadkill. They keep a list of charities that meat ends up going to.
BTDT 9/10 times the meat is contaminated from the gut bag or the intestines bursting and even if not, you can't eat what's been pulped or contaminated with hair or road crap.
your best bet is to cut off any leg that is whole and take the backstraps if they're also whole, the neck likewise, skin and all, and leave the rest. if your car still runs.
you can waste an awful lot of time and mess on trying to eat roadkill, it's just not worth it
>>7445256
That's a treat of the road. Skin it, gut it (reserving whatever organs you want like heart and liver), put the muscles in whatever bags you want, shove in the freezer and decide what you're going to do later because it's fucking 3 in the morning and fuck being awake.
>eat roadkill
>pieces of bumper in your meat
No thanks senpai
>>7445256
No longer then an hour. Especially if it's hot.
I hit one with my suv last month and had to finish it off with a hammer.
Brought it into the woods a bit and cleaned it. I butchered it when I got home
>use your bath tub
Does anyone remember that thread when anon hit a deer and took it home and cut it in his bathtub ? He posted pics and it was a glorious thread.
Watch a YouTube video on how to clean and butcher
It's the least the deer can do to replay you since it doesn't have insurance
>>7446791
>eat rabbit
>pieces of shotgun shell in your meat
Big deal
>>7447555
What if you had kept it alive until you got home, then hammered it?
Ethics aside, would this affect 'freshness'?
>>7445535
I think that might be something to do with laws on poaching but yes, As a Brit, I have been told the same thing. If you hit a pheasant or something, you cannot pick it up but the car behind you can!
My mate hit a badger once, made a mess of his front grill, I would hate to see the damage cause by hitting a deer full on!
>>7447566
I wouldn't suggest that. Deer can kick and their hooves are sharp af and can kill you.
Obviously the longer you keep it alive the fresher it would be. If you can get it an IV and some pain meds you may be able to delay it's death for a few days before all the blood covering its brain puts it in a coma and it needs a ventilator
In the 2 states of the US I've lived in, there's actually a roadkill waiting list for deer. The driver is responsible for calling it in to police. Police arrive. If the animal is suffering, they will call it in and request permission to discharge their weapon to put it out of its misery. Then the next person on the waiting list is called to pick it up quickly for processing. If no one on the wait list is available to get it immediately, the driver is offered it. If that fails Animal control picks up the carcass and disposes of it.
As for processing. The only thing that needs to be done to give you a day to process it is gutting it. You need to slice up the belly, being careful not to nick the intestines and remove all of the gastrointestinal organs. They are where the shit that fucks up the meat resides.
After that, there are all kinds of videos on youtube about how to skin and quarter a deer.
>>7445256
i hope the deer kills you
>>7447566
Not a good idea. Not only could the deer hurt you badly like >>7447570 mentioned, but stressed-out animals release endorphins, etc, into their bloodstream and this makes the meat taste bad. A quick death is important for the best quality meat.
>>7447652
Raises a good point. It's not so important that you completely butcher the deer right away. The important thing is to get rid of the blood and the guts in the abdominal cavity. This is pretty much the same thing that hunters do: hang up the deer, bleed it out, and remove the guts ASAP. At that point the meat will last for a lot longer before you break it down.
>>7445376
Any good?
>>7445284
In some counties it's legal to keep a deer you accidentally kill with your car. Check your local laws.
> t. knower
>>7447568
Yeah, that makes sense. I could see idiots risking it on purpose just for free meat or the idea that they could sell it off and make some money.
Not that it'd be worth it, I've seen plenty of pictures where deer have gone straight through windshields and killed the drivers. Even if you get off without death or injury your car is going to be a mess.
If it's cold enough the meat can keep for half a day easy
Ive never heard of it being illegal to take roadkill with you. I'd assume the county or town or whatever would be happy to have you move it for them.
My dad used to come across deer other people had hit and load them into his truck without knowing how long they had been there. Sight and smell are always your best friends when you are trying to get meat on the cheap.
>>7445256
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OQvt-gxbq5E
>>7445378
Someone post the pic of the deer going right through the windshield, horns and all. There's just a pool of blood in the car. It could seriously impale you.
>>7447560
>Nogunz
>>7446075
I think I just peed from laughing so hard. underrated post.
I love the rare times this image is relevant again.
>>7445338
In my state it's perfectly legal to keep road kill.
It's not like people are chasing them around fields in their honda civics or something. The places that consider it poaching are fucking stupid.
>>7447560
not using a slingshot? please explain yourself?
