my neighbor(a family man) just brought my a plate of his wifes cooking since he saw me get home at 8pm.
I just moved in a few months ago and we have only talked a few times but are planning on doing a few activities together
What's the appropriate thing to do in return? I washed the plate and taped a note describing how great the meal was so his wife knows I enjoyed it.
anything else I should do? natural born autist so i know i already fucked this up
He's prepping you to be the bull in his cuck fantasy. Your autism probably can't handle that. I suggest you write a note telling him that human interaction makes you uncomfortable, and to please avoid it in the future.
>>7414944
Say thank you and invite them over to make dinner for them sometime. Or maybe bake them a pie or some cookies or something neighborly like that.
>>7414944
Box of chocolates for her and beef jerky for him.
Bottle of wine.
Make love to her while he watches.
Basically any of the above.
>>7414958
Sounds like the wife's pie is already starting to bake for OP.
>>7414958
i can't cook. i was eating a shitty bagel from a gas station when he came over. also i'm single so a dinner would be awkward as fuck
Buy them Franzia and a package of toilet paper (feel free to open it and take a a few rolls for yourself). Practical and affordable
>>7414954
It's best to just straight out tell him you don't want any part of his cuckold fantasy - It's not that you think his wife is unattractive, but rather, you don't think you can handle the responsibilities.
>>7414969
Gift voucher to the local Christian bookshop
1/2 off pizza coupons
A 3 man tent
Do NOT fuck this up.
>>7414969
Bake something for them then, baking is easy af.
>>7414944
Do you want these interactions to go further? If you do something for them, it WILL become a thing, and you'll end up being invited over to have dinner with them.
>>7414959
>Bottle of wine.
this
i recommend a sweet rosé. preferably not american if possible.
Bake them something, for sure. Cookies or a cake or something of the like. If you're too autist to even bake, I'd suggest finding a bakery or something nearby and getting something from there for them.
>>7414985
yeah i'd like that. i just have no idea what to do. i don't want to show up with a plate of shitty cookies.
a single man showing up with a plate of baked goods at a house with children is sketchy as fuck.
>>7414989
A phallic cake should hit the spot.
>>7414992
You're over thinking this to much. Cookies are fine. Bottle of wine like others are saying is another good choice, but I have an odd feeling you're not sure what wine would be appropriate, so it may be best just to make them cookies.
If you're gonna be hanging out, make it appropriate you autismo.
Bottle of wine and a 6 pack of beer would make my wife and I feel really appreciated.
Give her this, she should get the message.
Shit in the dish before returning it
>>7415000
we live in bumblefuck which is where I wanted to buy a house, he's a blue collar mason
is craft beer a good idea or should I go with something cheap?
I don't want to seem pretentious
>>7415000
Be careful in case they're from a religion that forbids drinking. You don't want to be rude.
>>7415012
Pop over with a sixer of Natty.
>>7414954
this was my first thought too, but it might be simpler. they might have gotten some sexual satisfaction from op eating something they had sex in, eg his wifes cooking had semen and vag goop among the ingredients
>>7414958
>Say thank you and invite them over to make dinner for them sometime. Or maybe bake them a pie or some cookies or something neighborly like that.
This. Just reciprocate when the idea hits you as appropriate. Wanna grill something? You good at that? Invite them over, and can they bring anything, sure whatever they like as a side or to drink.
Invite them out, and if they say yes, you go. When the check comes...grab it first! They might counter with the tip, which you can allow. When the next holiday arrives, you have a nice opportunity to gift them with someone thoughtful, if you wish.
See something you can do for them? Do it. Walk the paper up to the door. Roll up their trash can so it doesn't look like no one is at home. (my neighbors are all retired and do this for me).
Gotta love the cu/ck/ theme of this thread
>>7415012
What kind of mason is he like a stone mason, wood mason, glass mason, metal mason? We need to know what kind he's made of.
Te first two are okay, generally nice mason types. Just remember to not bring them anything that is from their mason tribe, keep wooden bowls and spoons away from wood masons, as well as knives. If it is a metal mason be sure to bring things in glass or wood only, no metal pans for the cookies, you don't want to insult them. However, if you are unlucky you have a glass mason on your hands, since they're made of glass they can easily break so beware. They are the most temperamental of the masons, so they do break really easy. Also, under NO circumstances bring them anything in a mason jar, the glass masons take much offense to this.
Better hope you have a mason of wood, stone or metal.
good luck!
>>7415024
I wanna grow up in whatever neighborhood has these people
>>7415012
Yeah craft beer is perfect, something you haven't tried as you'll probably be offered one.
You must get her something too - she did the cooking after all.
Just ask the cashier at the liquor store - which wine goes best when you're hot and sweaty from pounding the neighbors wifes asshole
>>7414987
california wine is the best wine, period
>>7415024
But you have to be careful on the way home after you grab that check! If, when you're passing by the cuckshed, the husband doesn't look like he wants to get into it, don't force him. You have to let it happen naturally, or the wife won't enjoy it either.
>>7415012
Do you know they drink? If they are in recovery that would be awkward as hell.
You have to be careful gifting booze.
>>7415035
autism: the post
>>7415117
What does a cuckshed look like?
I'd ask my ex wifes father but he's in the other room.
>>7415136
If you want to increase your chances of the husband being down, try to make a big show of getting the check. Maybe pull the wife's chair out for her as you're sitting down. Offer to take her coat. That sort of stuff will emasculate him, and send him into full cuck mode.
>>7414944
Big ol pile of meatballs, OP. Costco size.
>knock on door
>hand frozen bag of ball'd meat to neighbor's wife
>nod / tip fedora
>walk away successfully
>>7415149
Kiss her ear as well
>>7414944
general rule of thumb is when someone gives you food like that, you don't return the dish empty
>>7414944
Don't be a fucking retard and just give them a movie gift certificate for 2.
How hard is it mane, really?
Jesus Christ this thread hurt to read.... So much autism.
OP, for god's sake. Buy them a nice cake or an Omaha steaks gift box or a bottle of wine or bake some cookies or jesus christ, anything.
Honestly though, if the wife made somethin for you, I would just buy her a nice bouquet of flowers. $20-40 is fine. Just stop by on your way out somewhere so you don't have to want to spend time chit chatting. Drop it off, say thanks so much for the food and that you enjoyed it and you wanted to reciprocate. Say I'll see you around and have a great day!
The autism in this thread hurts my dick.
>>7414954
First post. Best post. Never change 4chan.
>>7415283
>>7415283
>Hey Mr. and Mrs. Anon!
>Y'all made me some awesome food, your wifes cooking is awesome!
>To say thanks I got her this beautiful bouquet of flowers, hope ya don't mind!
great idea.
>>7415342
no you dingus...
OP goes over when only the wife is home and gives her the flowers, and maybe gives her something else
>>7415351
A giant penis?
>>7415351
Oh my bad, now the OP has to keep tabs on his neighbors and find out when Mr. Anon is working and when Mrs. Anon is home alone... that's WAY better.
>>7415372
He could possibly set up an elaborate camera network, it's what a responsible neighbor would do.
>>7415130
This.
Around Christmastime one year while I was at uni, I won a pet store giftcard worth $200 from a raffle. I had no pets at the time so I posted an ad on Craigslist offering the card /for trade/ and not for sale because I wanted either something good or something interesting to come out of it.
A guy replied saying that he won a basket of booze worth $300 as a door prize at his office Christmas party that he was willing to trade. Turns out, he didn't want the stuff because he's a Mormon and his religion forbids alcohol.
>>7414944
Since then, I've tried to think twice about gifting alcohol and foodstuff and have realised the most perfect food to gift is homemade bread. Since truly gluten sensitive people are so rare and you can tell the GF faddists immediately because they're nearly always unpleasant and preachy about it, bread is a great homemade gift to people.
So bake a simple loaf and pop on over.
>>7414944
Don't do anything, just give the plate back and say you really enjoyed it. You don't want to get involved with the 'normal' people, do you?
>>7415621
He wants to cuck the husband, we established that 40 posts back
>Ctrl F
>Cream pie
>0 results
gee willikers /ck/
>>7414944
If they're a family then maybe a gift voucher. They may need it
>>7415690
How much?
$30?
I liked the idea anon said about two movie tickets
>>7415713
I dunno, how much does a sexy new set of lingerie cost around your area? Maybe factor in a chastity device for the husband if you want them to feel extra special.
This thread is great
Also
>not spying on the house to see when he leaves her at home
Or just go over there like a normie and bring them the plate and maybe a six pack.
If you dont drink or dont think they do, who cares. Do it anyway
Serious reply here
If you want to ingratiate people to you you should ask them for a favor, not give them a gift. Maybe next time you go out of town ask him to put out you're trash or something, it will show that you trust them and rely on them. When you ask just say "and if there's ever anything I can do for you" or offer to buy him a beer to say thanks.
>>7415738
Someone mentioned earlier setting up cameras.
I'd do that, maybe sneak over every night for a week or so and listen outside their window to see if any sex is going on.
>>7415089
Underrated post kek
OP here.... I just went to their house to sneak around and see if I could find anything to give me a secret on what to give them. I put the plate on the doorstep with a note saying 'maybe some bull meat next time ;)' as a joke about the cuckstuff and I also left a bag of skittles. Then I had second thoughts and went back BUT THE PLATE WAS GONE. I must have woken them. Fuck, do you think he will understand the joke?
Does his wife have a son?
This is important OP.
ITT: /ck/ - Food & Cooking
>posters 31
So it probably is just one or two people samefagging hard. Get back to /tv/, horrible shitposters.
>>7416070
more like food and cucking
im laughing like a retard i love this thread. thank you op
>>7415109
No, its not.
Its not even good wine.
>>7415018
What the fucks wrong with you?
>>7415109
>period
>no "."
DAMMIT STOP PLAYING GAMES WITH MY HEART YOU TERRORIST
>>7416142
I seriously haven't laughed like this in months, I'm crying m8.
sue them for trying to poison you
take their house
now you have no neighbors
>>7415219
The general rule is be honest unless you're desistute, even then feed to a cat or a dog if it's nasty.
>>7415516
You two should have used the gift card to get a room at a local hotel for the two of you, then butt fucked each other like the faggots that you are.
>>7415342
Jesus, obviously have never dealt with people over the age of 30. Flowers are a perfectly fine gift. Done it many times, it's the perfect fall back gift when you're not sure exactly what to give. They're flowers, it's not like you're bringing a pack of rubbers and lube. Not everything has sexual undertones you virgin spergs. Or just get their kids a few gifts. Most parents don't need any bullshit anyways, but kids could always use a toy or something cool. Parents appreciate when you think of their kids and get them gifts.
Been great friends with my neighbors for 5 years. 3 little girls and an awesome couple. Have babysat for them before and have beers with the guy twice a week and usually dinner with them once a week. It's great to get to know your neighbors, you never know when you might need a helping hand.
>>7416285
>getting a hotel
lol
are you poor and have flatmates or are you a manchild living in mummy's basement? if i want a hot piece of hairy man-ass, i bring it the fuck home and have my way with it cuz i'm a grown-ass man and have my own place.
>>7414987
>rose
> anything but the worst selection possible
JUST
