>be me
>lunch
>no restaurant around
>eat hawker style meatball
>doesn't taste good but gotta eat or else stay hungry
>few hours later throat feels weird
>realise the meatball was probably laced with formaldehyde or borax, most likely the former
such is life in third world country
>>7868484
Borax kills Cockroaches. Always carry a set of roaches with you as food tasters.
>local cooking group meet up
>new local restaurant
>mariscos
>order coctel de pulpo
>drinking beer
>eating ceviche
>my coctel shows up
>wow people taking pictures of it
>people are all fawning over my coctel de pulpo
>they start eating my coctel de pulpo
>people are eating my coctel de pulpo
>coctel de pulpo is gone in minutes flat
>one piece of pulpo left in the cup for me
>eat it and swig a little of the broth
>ayyy lmao
>this shit tastes
>this shit
>tastes off
>dont say anything let it ride
>tell myself they wouldnt serve bad pulpo
>next morning people texting that feeling sick
>mention the coctel de pulpo tasted off
>people blaming my coctel de pulpo
>a dozen bad yelps ensue
mfw:
the place went out of business because of my coctel de pulpo.
>>7868484
>>be me
No fucking shit?!
Who the fuck else are you supposed to be, dipshit?
>>7870779
You're both you to me.
>>7870776
Your story makes me hate you and the people you associate with, despite the subject matter.
>>7870798
Me too but mostly because he's a subhuman shitskin
>>7870798
you comment makes me think youre a faggot and you should try harder.
>>7870801
Did you discern that from his 4chan Gold Account Profile Photo?
>>7870801
haha you stupid negro i'm not irish.
>>7870806
Kill yourself dumbass
>>7870801
>>7870798
>>7870821
>>7870834
Yes you really are acting like a faggot but you didn't need a 9gag tier image to tell us that
>>7870865
Everybody stand back. This one's on a tear!
>>7870934
Passive aggressiveness is a very feminine trait
>>7870946
I'd fuck me.
>>7870865
>"I contribute snarky gay ass comments on a shit tier cooking board"
>doesnt realize he's the actual cancer
>no one rikes him
>sulks and eats his top ramen while grunting
>makes thread on /ck/ how to make top ramen better
>for the 190th time this year
>typical /ck/ loser
>>7868484
>>realise the meatball was probably laced with formaldehyde or borax
What? Why?
>be seven years old
>mother, brother, and I go to this local deli for lunch, as per Saturday tradition
>feel a little queasy but ignore it
>get my usual: one scoop of egg salad and a small pineapple juice
>after lunch, go to bring some food etc. to mother's friend who sprained her ankle and can't drive for a few days until it heals a bit
>mother's friend lives at the end of a dirt road
>a looooooooong dirt road
>and it's bumpy
>as we're driving down the road, I feel something rising
>rising
>rising
>DRUMS IN THE DEEP
>ah, okay, here we are
>get out of the car
>instantly puke egg salad and pineapple juice all over myself and anything in the immediate vicinity
>start crying because seven years old
>puke out my nose
>cry more
>puke more
Eighteen years later, I still can't stomach either egg salad or pineapple juice.
>>7871022
>>be seven years old
Underage b&
>>7870978
OP here
Formaldehyde is used as cheaper alternative for food preservative
And borax can maintain juiciness
>Brother's birthday
>Brother wants to go to Nandos
>JUST chicken
sure why not
>Oven chips
>Weak as ass sauces
>Unfuckupable grilled chicken
It was OK but fuck the retarded CHEEKY NANDOS culture I hope it was all marketing