go to the other thread if you want to whine about kate, I want to hear about actual comms
Are you comms doing any fun meet-ups this month?
Any drama?
let it all out, gulls
my comm is having a big meetup this month but there were limited spots and I didn't get in, so I'm salty about it
probably for the best though as I should be saving money anyway.....
I've only been to one meet so far with my new comm but I honestly can't wait to go to another one. Hopefully I can have a good christmas coord for the christmas meet!
Trying to organize holiday stuff for my comm. Last year we went downtown and it was insanely crowded and we were all harassed by tourists, so I'm hoping to book a private room at a restaurant or something. Sadly though my comm is one of those where people are cheap about pre-paying for meets so I predict I will get resistance to going anywhere decent.
My comm is having a small meeting at a showing for the new Peanuts movie. Might go. Mostly excited for the kurisumasu one next month, though!
>>8702389
Chicago is doing a Fancy Tea at the Drake Hotel this month! I'm super pumped to go to a really nice venue for tea and see all the OTT coords~
My comm is doing a mani-pedi meetup next week, I'm excited because it's a place I've wanted to try out and I need my nails done in the worst way. I'm also happy that my skirt is going to match the theme of the meetup.
My comm is having a tea meet on Saturday. It's in the next town over and a lot of my comm (myself included) are college students living on campus with no car, so one girl was nice enough to offer to carpool us.
any reviews on dallas/ft worth comm all I ever hear about is houston
>hear all this drama about atlanta comm
>in savannah, no drama here, girls are very nice
>feels good
My comm is doing nothing and probably won't for the rest of the year. Tea by myself I guess.
>>8702530
Right?! I want to go and know what I'm prancing into.
>tfw I look at their Facebook and there seems to be a lot of itas
>even their mods look a bit rough
>>8702530
I'd love to hear about it too since there's a small chance I could be moving there
Our comm is really small and we are having a meet this month. However a girl I really can't stand is going. What do? I am helping out organizing the meet and I can't just tell her to not come because I find her insufferable.
Has anyone else had this problem?
>>8702568
find a legit reason to kick her out. one slip up is all it takes. maybe she cancels at the last minute too many times, or is bothering other comm members. and bam! your problem is gone
>>8702508
>mani-pedi meetup
That sounds so cute! Sounds like a bitch to organise but that'd be really fun to try
>>8702572
Our comm is almost too nice in that respect, we haven't ever kicked anyone out as we've had little to no drama. She would kick up a stink about it if I did somethink like that.
>>8702538
Why don't you plan a meet, anon?
>>8702568
Honestly, unless she's breaking rules or bullying people or something, you'll just have to put up with her.... finding someone annoying isn't really a good reason to start drama by kicking them out.
>>8702568
i've said it before and i'll say it again.
don't be a Petty Petti.
>>8702595
Not the case. My old comm had no set rules and made up a reason like anon above and kicked me out. It can happen some people legit think because they don't like someone they have the right to prevent them from the same hobby everyone loves. Really mature.
There's a meet up this month that's kind of why. Next month there's an ILD gathering, then later on there's an ice skating meet up I plan to go to. I went to the last one and it was pretty fun.
>ILD
going to dinner and a caberet show with new friends.
>Thanksgiving
someone is hosting a Thanksgiving weekend meet. it's a pretty sweet idea for those who can't spend the holiday with family.
>my own idea
there is a sushi place near me that combines authentic Japanese dishes with authentic local/Native American cuisine. when the semester is over i would like to send out feelers for interest in a reservation there. the things they do with sake are insane.
>>8702498
Holy shit I love tea at the Drake, that's going to be an awesome meet for your comm. I've never gone there in lolita before, I just had a grandma who liked to stay there and do tea but that's such a good venue for a meet. I hope pics show up!
My comm is having an annual fancy tea meet and while I'm psyched to visit the venue, I'm pissed because it's a limited space reservation and our worst itas managed to weasel in while much nicer, better-dressed girls are stuck on the waitlist. They're probably going to bitch about how little food they get for the price, too, I just know it.
>>8702678
where u at, anon? similar situation with my comm..
>>8702762
I'd rather not speak with a lot of specificity, but it's a midwest comm.
>>8702498
Its so expensive Drake himself better show up to this meet, baka.
>>8702538
same and i'm new so i don't know anyone besides one girl who already does the organizing of most meets. i guess i'll just have to set up a cozy november meet myself and just hope people show up :/
Anyone on the west coast/so-cal area going to Winter Lumiere? I'm interested but I haaaate driving to LA. Do you think it'll be worth it?
>>8702769
can you make a secondary fancy tea meetup? I am in the midwest, too, but idk if I'm in your comm, haven't been invited to any upcoming teas. I'll go if you're anywhere near southern IN
my local comm is quiet outside of conventions and other huge events. the only person making events lately is this one weird girl that has a vendetta against me, a few of my friends and some other members so we aren't invited, bawww. we even approached her at a public meet and she said that we don't like/comment enough on her SM. like.... zero chill. outside of her ita gatherings there's not a whole lot going on for the local public comm besides alot of private lol'ing at photos from her meetups.
>>8702389
Find your local comm: Lolita Community Directory
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1evXegSoFbfEXn8o0joeA-KFvolNKPKllgvaYqNgvOiw/edit#gid=1
I'm organizing a big christmas tea party with my comm and I'm so excited! Me and my friend always whine about lack of decent meetups so we decided to plan something ourselves.
I wish the Ohio comm was doing something for ILD. I'd feel better about hosting it if I hadn't just joined.
>>8702911
Me too! I'd host something if I wasn't already hosting a meetup in December,
>>8702823
sounds like you're projecting hard
>>8702530
>>8702555
>>8702556
Haven't been there in years, but they used to have a lot of really nice, really well-dressed members. The FB page is also something to take with a grain of salt, since I don't think most of the people posting stupid shit like "support my indigogo to open a lolita store, yay!" actually attend meets.
The only meet I can remember seeing photos from is almost two years old at this point though. Sorry, dudettes.
What thread are we talking about Kate on? I just noticed she seems to have deleted everything
What have been some of your favorite parlor games at a lolita meet up? We usually play 1 ice breaker at the beginning of the meet in case there's new people, and I'm running out of ideas.
>>8703033
i think the other thread was deleted but don't shit up this one
Does anyone else find the idea of "Harajuku fashion walk" cringe worthy? My comm is doing it for IDL and I'm just not trilled about parading with every weeabo in town on a busy street.
>>8703035
seconding this. my comm is having a (public) meetup at a teahouse Saturday, so anything like cards against humanity or apples to apples is out of the question (too loud, and we got one girl who already is very loud who's gonna show up). And I don't want to just sit around and drink tea
>>8703042
I don't really get them either, just seems like a way to show off honestly
>>8703035
>>8703049
Most of the ones I know require getting up/moving around, which isn't really conducive to a tea parlour setting.
Maybe lolita-themed bingo or a trivia game or something?
We did trivia and a word search in teams at one meet, and the team with the most points got special prizes on top of their goody bags.
>>8702568
Just tolerate her. If she isn't a terrible person then it's best to just try and avoid in depth conversation.
>>8702611
If you get kicked out it's probably for a reason. Why did they kick you out?
>>8703042
I don't find them all that cringeworthy because the intention behind it is usually a good one, but I don't understand the point either. It's not educating anyone on anything, it's just making yourself into a walking tourist attracting for a brief period of time.
Lolita meet-ups get plenty of that shit as it is. Why arrange an event especially for it?
When do you guys think its OK to start hosting meets? I'm fairly new to my comm but I'd like to host meets at some point so that there can be meets closer to me (and the other members in my area) but I'm not sure what the etiquette is.
>>8702389
>comm revived a few years ago
>have lots of meets, but I can't go to a ton of them because I live in buttfuck nowhere
>girl who organizes most of the meets leaves lolita
>nobody else is planning meets
>we didn't even have anything for halloween
>try to bring up ideas, but nobody ever goes through with anything or seems interested in attending
>have nowhere to wear lolita
I'll probably just sell everything soon
>>8702772
afternoon tea isn't cheap, poorfag.
>>8703083
It got deleted because it got reported for being off topic. Time to find a new thing to obsessively hatefap in lieu of real hobbies and friends, basement dweller.
>>8702795
I'm thinking about visiting for it as well. The price and lack of details has me a bit worried about it ending up like the Seattle trainwreck.
I feel like cgl and cof are really slow suddenly, now that Halloween has happened.
It's so sad.
>>8703042
I don't find it cringeworthy, it's really fun. We just had one in NYC, and it was fun, casual and you got to meet a bunch of new people. It was nice to see people dressed in other styles besides lolita in real life.
>>8703073
You can start literally any time. Go for it! You might be surprised to learn that there may be a lot of girls around your area that would like the idea of a closer meet as well.
>>8702823
her SM?
>>8702795
Wait, I haven't heard about this and I'm a SoCal lolita? Is it on the LA lolita events page?
>>8702911
I'm sure someone will come up with something. Why not start a thread in the group to ask what people have planned?
>>8703042
>Does anyone else find the idea of "Lolita Meetups" cringe worthy? My comm is doing it for IDL and I'm just not trilled about parading with every lolita in town on a busy street.
>>8703184
I hosted a meet after joining my comm for about one month. I'll say that I have hosted meetups in the past, though, so I think my experience helped a lot. Even if you're relatively unknown in the comm, people will still attend if the meet appears well-organized and professional. (I guess it can't hurt if you also look well-dressed in your photos.)
>>8703035
What about murder?
>>8703473
oh wow, edge-chan! almost cut myself there!
>>8703491
Murder/Murder in the dark is a party game.
One person is the killer. Another is the detective. It's like Heads-up Seven-up but with the aspect of people being gradually eliminated from the game when they're tapped.
>>8703224
Meh, cgl seems slow only because we don't have Halloween newbies coming in and starting their own new threads instead of posting to the Halloween stickie.
More on-topic, do planners for ILD already have their restaurants/cafe reservations set?
It doesn't seem as if anybody in my comm has taken the initiative yet, but it's also quite possible that they've already tried and the places offering afternoon tea and such and have turned them down, as we're a large group (usually ILD is 40-50 people)
Either way, I'm thinking of buying some things for goodie bags. If there's something formal after all, I can donate them, if not I can hand them out at an impromptu meet.
What do people like seeing in goodie bags? I was thinking of Korean sheet masks, but I'm concerned that it might weird out people who have no experience in Asian skincare.
>>8703517
There's also the fact that some people have sensitive skin and those masks can fuck you up. I had one give me a weird chemical burn-esque rash for a week once, and I didn't even leave it on the full 30 minutes the pack suggested.
Annnnyway. Maybe something like cute stationery items? Pens and little notepads and stickers or the like? Maybe see if a local lolita accessory shop would be willing to donate a few items as raffle goods or something? If you go the Aliexpress or Ebay route in time, you could get those kinds of things for cheap and with a nice level of variety.
>>8702530
>>8702555
>>8702556
>>8703017
Sweet girls and a ton of really well-dressed ones. I met some of them at A-kon and I was completely floored at the warm welcome. There was a picture floating around but that didn't have half the girls I met, or any of the ones who hosted the two Friday panels I went to. Super diverse group and honestly as much as I didn't like A-kon I'm going again to hang out with them. Sorry if it sounds like I'm whiteknighting but I really like them a lot. I've been leaving the consideration open because of my job but if I had to switch comms I will go to them in a heartbeat.
>>8703524
Good point, I forgot that some people have sensitive skin. Thanks for the suggestions on notepads and pens! I'll see if there is anything cute on ebay that could fit the bill.
>>8703542
Yeah. For goodie bags, I tend to avoid anything too personal like skin products or food. Allergy risks are just too common.
Something else to consider are maybe giving into kitsch and getting cute party favours like Christmas crackers for place settings, or little confetti poppers or the like to put into the bags?
>>8702568
if she happens to be the type who bails out a lot then you have no worries. we have the same problem in a meet coming up, girl is seriously loopy.
>>8703042
Yeah, I don't like them. It seems silly to complain that people stare/take pictures/are rude to you in public if you're going to parade yourself around like a fucking show. Also, the most cringe-worthy people tend to show up to them. Most rational people wouldn't want that kind of negative attention, I think.
>>8703205
Hi voldie
>>8702530
>>8702555
>>8702556
>>8703017
>>8703529
DFW lolita here, but I'm trying to get more integrated into the com myself and not be a lone lolita all the time. Since I don't attend too many meets, I can't vouch for details but I can say that despite not attending many meets, I'm always warmly welcomed and have a good time. I've never encountered any drama in the DFW com, which is nice since there's plenty of other drama to be had in this town.
There are itas and there are well dressed girls. Sweet and goth are the dominant styles locally, but some people do wear classic. We may not win a best dressed award, but having lurked enough in the com and seeing where the mods and others started, I think everyone has improved a lot.
The community that is active seems to be made up of a college aged people, though the mods are out of college (still 20s). The meets are sometimes low-brow, but fun (our meet on Saturday is going to Daiso with the OKC com and then having lunch at a popular cafe in a Korean shopping center), though there are high-brow meets (ballet, art museum, etc). The balance is nice and as of late there have been a lot more meets happening in general, which is nice.
A lot of the local lolitas are also integrated into the local anime communities. A-kon is our largest con (and is a top 10 in the US) and recently announced they would be having a J-fashion track. I expect more of the local girls will do panels. I did a 201/Nitpick panel at A-kon and A-fest and both were well received. Here's to hoping for more lolita panels!
>>8703509
i have literally never heard of that
thanks anon
>>8703509
>>8703473
For ILD i once made an entire Murder mystery theme, gave everyone a character with background story and pre selected the killers for 3 rounds. 2 cops had to investigate by talking to everyone and everyone else had a part to play that interacted with other characters too. It was this entire huge idea with several days of story writing and character creation. even people's BFs/GFs had NPC characters where they could talk and be a part of the game but were not crucial to the plot line. it was hard work but i had so much fun doing it. in the end, I show up to ILD and everything was haywire. Many people didn't end up showing up (including the killers), many people didn't read their paragraph for their character. and even though i had cheat sheets for everyone in case they forgot, no one really wanted to do it in the end. It was a hot summer day and i was over ambitious about the theme. The group at the meetup weren't willing or able to pay for a venue, that was my main mistake. I wanted everyone to go and feel included. I learned a lot from hosting that meetup, but i met a bunch of really sweet people. One day, i do want to give the murder mystery game another try. or at least turn it into a real story. It jumpstarted my passion for writing again (ignoring how crappy drunk 4chan typing crap is that i just wrote)
>>8703573
I loved your panel, anon! It was pretty cool. Do you think you'll host it again next year?
>>8703573
How do the DFW lolitas feel about the anime matsuri drama?
>>8702911
I was thinking of hosting something but I have to talk to some venue people and see how much it would be and work out a ticket cost.
The only big worry I have is that not enough people will RSVP to cover costs.
>>8703557
At our holiday meet the hostess made cute ornaments for place settings.
>>8703587
We are allowed to have online comm generals. We just can't single out people and dissect every aspect of their lives. We have to try and keep things more general. This is difficult when trying to talk about the closure of lace considering the whole group centered around Kate
>>8703711
There have to be rules, otherwise it all goes to shit. If you want to talk about Kate, go over to lolcow.farm like everyone else
>>8703713
anon pls. You have free speech, but you're obliged to keep on topic. You can speak freely on farm.
Getting back on topic, are there any Icelandic Lolitas? I heard about the comm a good few years ago, but is it still active at all? I might visiting for a week next year.
>>8703716
Private individuals can discriminate and "censor" virtually at will. The law only protects you from the government.
>>8703713
go to lolcow then and stay there
thier mods never delete anything
>>8703718
but the law isn't for CGL lol
Does anyone else feel sort of uncomfortable with guys joining their comm, even if they're brolitas? I know it's unfair to judge prematurely and the fashion should be for everyone and everything, but I just find something about it skeevy..
>>8703713
This is a privately run public site and its owners may allow or ban whatever they want on it. You're not entitled to using other people's severs to broadcast your opinion on other people.
>>8703912
If they have like one dress and obviously look like a man, and keep their crossdressing a secret, then yes. We have one guy in our comm, but he's socially adept, not confused about his gender, has an extensive brand wardrobe, crossdresses regularly and passes with ease. He's not creepy because he fits in with the group and is just a guy who enjoys women's fashion, not some creep with a fetish. He also doesn't ask us to hold his hand through everything, he's learned to dress and do makeup and such by himself. I think the big difference is the personality of the guy and the effort they put in. And unfortunately, it's not uncommon to get pervy creeps, so I understand your concern, anon. Don't think it's wrong to be cautious when communities have gotten dangerous brolitas like Melissa. It's all right to be extra demanding of men.
>>8703517
In the past, I would fill gift bags with edible treats (candy and cookies) since it can cut the expense down. I also prefer giving food because people can eat it and be done (your disposable mask idea is also good for this reason). I usually throw away cheap jewelry or other dollar-store crap that I receive in gift bags because it's usually stuff that I won't use.
I personally make reservations at the beginning of October for ILD, but I live in a city with a large comm, and different groups sometimes have to compete for tables at the more popular tea places. This is likely to depend on where you live, though.
>>8703912
Yes, but because I've found brolitas so be 200x more catty, bitchy, and obnoxious
>>8703612
We submitted another 201 level panel, but with a hair/makeup/accessories focus. We're going to keep doing the live nitpicks, though!
>>8703617
I personally cannot say how the group at large feels. I know that sentiment amongst those active with A-kon or at least strong supporters / participants of that con feel like this is a good chance to make the J-fashion track and capitalize on AM's failures. I also know that in years past, several DFW lolitas have attended AM.
I personally am pretty disgusted about the Matsuri thing, both from what John did to all the girls AND just from the fact that the con is run so poorly. Matsuri is tempting because of all the brands and for me it'd be easy, since my gf lives in Houston. But I'd rather keep my money and not support AM.
I'm also just glad it was Matsuri / Houston and not DFW. There's enough drama in all the cosplay groups or anime clubs or whatever here in Dallas that it's nice that the lolita group is, from appearances, very relaxed and not dramatic.
>>8703922
This is the type of thing that scares me. If they're well dressed and clearly have genuine interest in the fashion then I have no reason to worry, but that just doesn't seem to be the case for the ones I have personally seen, so that makes me cautious because there HAVE been creepy and even dangerous people who try to invade communities.
>>8703957
Exactly, after a while you can usually tell if the guy is genuine in his interest, but brolitas who whine about not being included need to understand that of course we're being cautious, we have every reason to be, especially if there are underage girls in the community. We have every right to demand more from men, and they should understand that their presence may be intimidating in what's usually a safe space for women.
>>8703922
Speaking of creepy brolitas, did that sissy ever get removed from the Oldschool comm on facebook?
>>8704215
I don't remember hearing about this, deets anon?
>>8703716
lol 4chan isn't -the- place for free speech on the internet, i don't understand why that's so confusing to you. i agree that the mods can be heavy handed here on /cgl/ from time to time, but they're almost certainly better off being safe than ending up sorry or in legal trouble later.
>>8703912
Every brolita that's joined my local comm has turned out to be creepy as fuck. Sure there's perfectly nice ones out there, but yeah, I'm not risking hanging out with one ever again.
>>8703573
I was there for your panel, anon! It was great and I'll go again if you have plans for next time. (M-maybe I will also ask for concrit myself?!) I'm also local to DFW but rarely go to meets because I'm shy as fuck. I think I'll try again at the next local con though; everyone seemed very nice.
>>8703716
>>8703718
Dude, please stop. There's being an edgelord and there's being cringe to the point where I can't even look at the fucking post directly anymore.
>>8704290
This is what I love about the DFW com. Even if you don't go regularly, they're still incredibly nice, and they'll remember you.
We've submitted to A-kon, but A-fest is up in the air since it's the same weekend as Otakon. I'm really glad you enjoyed the panel! Since I'm not super active in the community I was a bit nervous doing a lolita panel, but I'm really encouraged that people enjoyed it.
>>8702911
There's a meetup in Findlay, IIRC.
>>8703912
I'm cautious right from the get-go. We've had at least one sissy and two "tfw no gf" types join the FB group before. Only the sissy came to meets and did anything that required banning. The other two were just annoying, but got bored and left when they figured out that wearing fancy clothes wasn't going to get them laid.
Is the NorthCarolitas comm still active? I know their livejournal hasn't been updated in forever, and most the people posting on it are just saying how they've been trying to get into the fb group and haven't been getting a response. I originally asked in the stupid questions thread and was directed here.
>>8704244
If I remember correctly, he was active in fetish circles and didn't adequately hide it...
>>8704507
Yep, it's still active on FB. Sometimes I think people have had problems with the mods not checking their "others" folder to see messages from potential members, so if a few days go by and you still haven't been accepted, I'd try messaging another mod with your application.
>>8704592
Oh okay, thank you!
>>8704628
Yep, no problem! If you're new to NC I also recommend you check out the Carolina Kei group. It's a secret group, but if you ask nearly anyone in the NorthCarolitas group (most of them are members of that group too, but not all), they can send you an invite.
>>8704581
We had a person like that in our comm, mtf transgender, but in a ton of sissy and humiliation groups as well
They were asking for like $25k for their transition on their gofundme
I want to shake the "brolita" in my comm because he calls himself that when all he really wears is the same borderline ita suit and top hat with shitty lace and a couple people have tried telling him that its aristo and to be a brolita he needs to wear a dress. It's autistic as fuck to be so irritated by semantics but I can't help but be irritated. Also the comm leader doesn't own any actual lolita clothes and doesn't seem to be interested in getting any, considering she is aware of this and regularly calls herself ita. She's been the comm leader for at least a year.
>>8704866
Weird that shes the comm leader, but at least shes self aware. Is she doing a decent job of organizing meets?
How is the LA comm? Haven't really heard about them much lately.
Probably moving down there soon due to a job offer.
>>8703922
My old comm had a guy like yours.He was slightly older but showed obvious effort into looking and dressing nice and had a very good wardrobe. He was actually really great to have around since one, he wouldn't put up with anyone being harassed in public, and two, kept an eye on everyone who joined and helped fend off a few true creepers since they'd usually either leave quickly upon seeing how tight knit he kept us, or think he was in the same thing as them and say something incriminating.
My comm is full of bullshit. They like to be the "drama" free comm and be so proud that they manage to shut shit down before it gets out. But the mods talk shit about everyone behind their backs and they completely ignore issues rather than fix them. I'm just salty
>>8704873
She does an okay job. Sets up a once a month tea party but for some reason posts it to a different "meetup" group than the comm group. It just irks me that she doesn't own a single piece of lolita specific clothing, not even off brand or bodyline.
>>8703071
SF comm again
There is a girl in my comm every one loves but everytime I've talked to her she is incredibly self centered. ALL she ever talks about is herself and her sickness, and how fragile and how special she is. No-one else notices. She is pretty and has pretty coords so I wonder if other girls overlook her special snowflake personality.
>>8705764
Are you sure no one else notices? We have a similar case in our comm, but everyone is just too mature to say anything or treat her poorly because it doesn't matter, and that would be stupid.
>>8705764
>>8705790
Same here in our comm. Best to just ignore. If she is a big problem, just don't invite her to small meets if you can. Usually those types do better in large meets where they pretty much observe and maybe bother the person next to them. At a small meet they will take over. I'm sorry but I don't have time to care for a grown adult.
>>8705323
I feel like someone should also plan meets for someplace that isn't her house. Like a café or something. For girls who actually wear lolita in the actual lolita group, not her weird side group.
>>8706176
I'm trying to set it up.
>>8705676
There have only been four people banned from SF comm, all of them because of sexual harassment.
>gulls suspicious of men in comms because they might be creepy or lonely or even sex offenders
>gulls not as "uncomfortable" around female scammers, shit-stirrers, etc.
you are more likely to be harassed or defrauded by a woman in the fashion. sissies can be gross but they aren't likely to actually hurt you, they're just easy to target.
>>8705120
Is this in the southwest?
My comm is exactly like this....
>>8705120
lol get over it
>>8704881
>>8702795
LA comm is relatively chill, whatever drama they have tends to be confined to themselves and you don't hear about it unless you happen to be part of their inner circles. On the surface everyone is civil at least and if you just go to meet ups with the sole purpose of getting to know new people and enjoy yourself you'll have a good time.
The past summer ILD was really nice and the girls who set it up are doing Winter Lumiere so I'm expecting something on par with summer. I'm thinking about going but not sure of my finances yet, plus there isn't a whole lot of info up about what's going on. Last time at least their website had the menu up but I'm kind of picky about food so I want to know what's available to eat first...
>>8706333
We call out scammers and shit-stirrers here all the time anon.
>>8702389
My comm is having a themed high tea meet this month! Im super excited since the food looks really cute. This is also my first non-casual/larger meet but im shy and awkward so im kind of worried about meeting all the other girls.
My comm doesnt really seem to have much, if any drama but it might just all be under the surface. Tbh a bit of drama would be fun though
>>8705790
Yes, she is very popular and gets invited to private meets. I'm sure no-one or almost no-one notices. I avoid her and don't invite her anywhere. I won't cause a fuss, I'm just shocked nobody else notices this.
>>8706687
For example, when I repeated things she says, verbatim, to my boyfriend, he almost busted a gut laughing and had worse things to say about her then I did. But when she says them at meets, everyone smiles and nods. Like I said she gets invited to the private meets so I don't believe everyone is humoring her. It's crazy. I do ignore her I just wanted to vent someplace.
>>8706658
praise the lords, has the filter been removed?
my comm is doing something casual for ILD, which i think will be nice
>>8706699
Maybe it's the kind of thing where everyone thinks everyone else is fine with it, and so nothing changes because everyone is too afraid to speak up. This was the case with us. Our person is comparably horrible, to be honest.
>>8704881
I'm moving there soon as well. I've lived in the area a few years back but wasn't involved in any comms and didn't own a dress at the time.
>>8706521
Thanks for the insight! I bought my ticket for Winter Lumiere and that will be my first official LA event. I'm hoping the menu will be posted soon and that the people will be welcoming.
There's this newer girl in my comm who is incredibly irritating. Half the time she looks like an ita, but what really bothers me is her constant need for attention. One time, we were at a meet together and she walked up to my friend and I and just started non stop talking about how busy she's been because of her blog. From that day on, that's all she's talked about. She asks us to follow and support it, follow her on instagram, like her storenvy, subscribe to her youtube channel. I'm exhausted. I've never met someone who was so hungry for fame and recognition before. At first I thought she was just desperate to make friends, but I realized what she really wanted was followers. It really sucks the fun out of going to meet ups.
Good god. There's some cosplayer that recently joined my comm's facebook group and I'm not sure if I'll kill him or myself first, he's so annoying. Whenever he opens his mouth it's this really fucking awkward humblebragging about weird shit he's definitely made up (like meeting real life gothic lolita girls in harajuku!!! do kawaii!!) and he obviously has no idea what he's talking about whenever he tries to join in on the conversation. I'm super annoyed because we have a great comm and I just don't want any bullshit ruining it. If I encounter him at any future meet-ups I'm putting my no-bullshit suit on - I want to shut him down as hard as possible tbqfh so I can discourage him from trying to partake in any meets. I'm like, 95% sure he's there just to show off to/pick up girls.
>>8707371
is he a cosplayer joining a lolita comm or a cosplay comm? if it's a lolita comm kick him out immediately because lolita comma are for lolitas and oujis only
Are there any Lolita comms in Sweden/Scandinvia? I've searched, but all I can find is the annual lolita market which has passed, and like 2 closed groups on fb.
>>8707371
oh my god, i think we're in the same comm. his posts are so fucking annoying. acts like he knows everything about "gothic" fashion/culture, but his outfit sounds like hot topic mall goth trash.
>>8706812
That could be it. Or she's gotten worse with time.
>>8707538
a cosplayer joining a lolita comm, trying to be ouji......I think.....but completely failing because he literally has no clue. Like I said, I don't think he actually has any real interest in the fashion, I think he's just here for attention and possibly to pick up girls.
>>8707565
like WTF is this shit. I hope he sees that no one gives a fuck and he decides not to show up to any meets. cause if he brings any cosplayer friends to meets too I'm definitely not gonna tolerate any bullshit lol the comm is great right now and I don't want anyone screwing that up
>>8707663
Well then what are you waiting for? Vote that fucker off the island
>>8707746
what am I supposed to do anon? I'm not a mod or admin so it's not like I can do anything about it, plus technically he hasn't done anything besides be annoying - that really isn't a banable offense unless the act of being annoying is interfering with the dynamics of the group. messaging a mod while he's just acting like a dope probably will just make me look like a dramamonger or paranoid. I have a feeling the mods may not be thrilled by him either, but they're all nice girls with integrity, even if they don't like him either I know they aren't gonna do anything until he does something to actually disturb the group.
since I believe he wants attention the only thing I can really do is not give it to him.
>>8706524
there is a difference between calling someone out on 4chan and complaining about how you are uncomfortable and/or afraid around someone and wish they would leave.
female lolitas do way more harm far more often than sissies. i think sissies, and honest brolitas, are just easier to target as sources of potential danger.
>>8706333
>>8707812
Bruh, cgl has constant thread where we post itas and laugh about them for no reason other than we don't like the way they're dressed. We already bitch about non-creepy, non-sex-offending girls we don't like, what the hell makes you think we're not going to bitch about guys we don't like, let alone creeps/sissies with actually juicy drama and potential lolcow content?
Lolita is not a "safe space". It's just regular girls, in frilly dresses. You go to them at your own risk, and yes, that includes being targeted if you're a sissy or a creep. Make your own sissy/creep meetup if that bothers you so much.
>>8707303
Are you in the OH comm by chance?
>>8707812
People are generally consistent about calling out scammers and handling psychos. Are you just... not in a comm, or something?
We complain about sissies because they're really blatantly using our hobby and meetups to get off. Lolita meetups are for socializing with others who are into the fashion, not for those into being publicly humiliated for sexual gratification. Scammers crop up in every community, they're universal. Sissies are tragically almost lolita community specific because of the combination of gatherings, a desire for social acceptance (which makes us less likely to just call them creeps immediately), and some aesthetic crossovers. So sissies think they and their doms can use our fashion and socializing as a way to get their rocks off. It's not okay to involve others in your sex fantasies without their consent, especially since minors often participate in meets.
>>8705764
Are you in the Portland comm? This girl sounds exactly like someone in that one.
>>8707952
It also feels incredibly sexist that they consider it humiliating to dress feminine. Of course lolitas are uncomfortable with the idea of hanging out with sissies.
And they don't even bother to research proper makeup techniques. So much blush and lipstick that just. Isn't. Flattering. With a fashion that emphasizes a polished look, you should at least wear some CC cream or something.
Being biologically male or being a poorfag are no excuses. You can easily do makeup.
Research on makeup: plenty of online tutorials out there. Wayne Goss is considered a makeup god on youtube; being biologically male is no excuse in 2015.
Budget on makeup: there are plenty of pharmacies out there which have 100% return policies on opened makeup that didn't work out for you).
Allergy issues of makeup: there are hypoallergenic brands like Almay at drugstores. See above for return policies if stuff ends up not working for you. Do goddamn patch testing.
>>8707988
Not that poster but I know exactly who you are talking about.
>>8707893
I am not, sorry.
>>8708282
It's okay. There's a small group of very well dressed people and a handful of itas, but I'd say the majority of the comm is decent. There was some recent drama with one member demanding a refund for a non-refundable ticketed event, but that was quickly dealt with and the person is no longer in the comm.
>>8708282
It's a cool comm, lots of 'muh disabilities' though. Drama tends to be under wraps and dealt with quickly by mods.
I love my comm though
>>8708328
Yeah, mods took care of that so fucking quickly, a lot of people didn't even notice what had happened
>>8702530
They're nice but love to shit talk and even the mods will shit talk you. They make secret groups to make fun of people. But I've only heard about it so I could be wrong.
>>8702611
Did they prevent you from wearing lolita? If everyone thinks you're an annoying cunt they have no obligation to put up with you.
Lately it seems my comm is only having all these large ticketed events for which the tickets sell out within a few hours. That is great for the comm, but I personally don't feel comfortable at large events. I wish we could have a smaller more casual meet at a cafe or something, I want to get to know some of the girls without having to try to remember 50+ names/faces or getting smacked in the head by wayward scepters and tripping over capes and peignoirs.
>too much spaghetti to organize something myself
>>8703579
That sounds really awesome anon, what a shame it didn't work out!
>>8708130
>It also feels incredibly sexist that they consider it humiliating to dress feminine
Person you're replying to here, I understand where you're coming from with this but I gently disagree. Being dressed up in clothes for the opposite gender against your will would probably be relatively embarrassing for anyone, especially if they aren't used to wearing certain things in their daily lives. The focus is less on "eww girls" and more on "oh my god this clothing isn't meant for someone in my gender role and I would die if Barry from the office saw me!" and it's a thrill for them. Which is fine, but fashion meets are not an appropriate venue for sexual roleplay shit.
Anyway, I agree with the rest of your reply. Regardless of your gender/sex/whatever you are going out to a social event, and it makes sense to make yourself look good for it. A couple youtube makeup tutorials will go a long way.
>>8707952
remember the original discussion is not about sissies but the conflation of male lolitas with sissies. anons in this thread have said that any male in lolita is wrong.
it's easy to focus on sissies, as well as potential sex offenders, and lump male lolitas in with them, and then say "men should not wear lolita, it's creepy." but that's as dumb as a fear of flying when driving is more likely to kill or injure you.
yes, banning men from meets would remove the ones who might be there to get off. but if scammers and drama whores are mostly female, why not ban women from meets too? you're more likely to meet a woman with bad intentions in lolita than you are a man. banning a gender doesn't remove problems.
>>8708812
nobody said to ban all men from meets, just that it's fair to be more cautious of them because there's a higher chance that they're joining to fulfill their fetish/creep on girls/etc
it is a safety issue - girls might be catty and potential scammers, but aside from really extreme situations, girls don't make me feel unsafe or creeped out.
>>8708812
>ban women from meetups and there will not be anyone at the meetup
>ban men from meetups and nothing of value is lost
>>8703912
>Does anyone else feel sort of uncomfortable with guys joining their comm, even if they're brolitas?
Original question.
>>8703922
>Don't think it's wrong to be cautious when communities have gotten dangerous brolitas like Melissa. It's all right to be extra demanding of men.
Female lolitas in your comm have more motivation, and support from other women, to do hurtful things. The ATL comm has members who slash tires and bully girls out, but that doesn't mean you should avoid all women.
>>8703948
>I've found brolitas so be 200x more catty, bitchy, and obnoxious
Most of /cgl/'s drama whores are female, and it's women who keep BtB and lolcow alive.
>>8703957
>This is the type of thing that scares me. If they're well dressed and clearly have genuine interest in the fashion then I have no reason to worry, but that just doesn't seem to be the case for the ones I have personally seen, so that makes me cautious because there HAVE been creepy and even dangerous people who try to invade communities.
There are dangerous people everywhere. It might make you feel better to think of it as only men invading communities, but the regular bullying and ego damage is done by women towards women.
>>8704005
>We have every right to demand more from men, and they should understand that their presence may be intimidating in what's usually a safe space for women.
Just like anyone who admits to using /cgl/ should be expected to be treated suspiciously since 4chan is full of hateful, malicious bitches.
>>8704280
>I'm not risking hanging out with one ever again.
That's racist.
>>8708832
So no, maybe not proposing bans, but anons are making blanket statements based on limited experience, while using /cgl/ for the express purpose of talking shit about or harassing/obsessing over fellow lolitas.
The "lolcow" obsessiveness is more creepy to me than a guy joining a comm for the sake of his boner. The drama threads here are mental masturbation; remember when it was called "wank"?
>>8708282
What makes you say Portland?
>>8708884
That's kinda what I was wondering?
>>8708880
You're obviously a sissy who hates women but wants to dress up as one for the thrill of it.
>>8708894
>efame obsessed farmer detected
>>8708897
>I'm not risking hanging out with one ever again.
That's racist.
How is that racism?
>woman-hating creepy brolita detected
>>8708892
my girl actually is in PDX
probably not who you might think
>>8708907
Oh, I'm in pdx and still don't know who you're talking about
But then again, everyone has illnesses in the pdx comm, but some do well to keep it to themselves
>>8708880
are you a sissy who got banned from a comm or
>>8708880
>>>8703912
She also admitted it's unfair to judge prematurely. Let her voice her feelings, you don't get to force other people to bottle up their own feelings just in case you feel offended.
>>>8703922
This anon actually explained the difference between brolitas and sissies. She's not even conflating the two, let alone advocating a ban on males.
>>>8703948
You're proving her right, though. You just threw a tantrum because you imagined a couple of unfavourable comments. How is that not obnoxious?
>>>8703957
She's explaining that she has personal bad experience. If you're bitten by a dog it's understandable to be afraid of dogs. If you've been creeped on by sissies it's natural to be wary around a guy in a dress.
>>>8704005
This one again reiterates that there is a difference between creepy sissies and the genuine brolitas
>Just like anyone who admits to using /cgl/ should be expected to be treated suspiciously since 4chan is full of hateful, malicious bitches.
Yes, they are. Where have you been. cgl is not welcome in certain comms because of its reputation. And those of us who are on it learn to deal with it, not bitch and moan about acceptance.
>>>8704280
>>I'm not risking hanging out with one ever again.
>That's racist.
That's the wrong word, and she's not advocating a ban either, she's voicing her personal view, most likely knowing it's politically incorrect
>So no, maybe not proposing bans, but anons are making blanket statements based on limited experience
At least two of the comments you linked explained the difference between brolitas and sissies. The person who is making blanket statements is you. The one implying a ban on all males is also you.
>The "lolcow" obsessiveness is more creepy to me than a guy joining a comm for the sake of his boner.
Again. If you don't like it, leave. Why are you even here?
....Anon here feels safer around guys, because if guys are creepy, people pick up on it and are not afraid to take action.
Girls can be malicious, backstabbing, and start crying if they don't get what they want, which makes unexperienced peeps feel sorry for them, and hoopla you've been excluded because 'Macy doesn't feel comfortable around you' when all you did was point out that if Macy has to beg Sally and Alice to lend her money for food this month again, maybe she shouldn't have spent her salary on brand-new brand clothes.
I have no problem calling out sissies and fetishists over their behaviour.
I do have problems with inexperienced shits falling for 'waaah poor me'
>>8709021
this tbqh
>>8708970
>You just threw a tantrum
i don't get comments like this. disagreement does not mean anyone is upset, or is a member of the group being discussed. the "calm down" and "you must be X" comments seem naive.
half the time it doesn't even seem like either side is paying attention to what the other says. way too much projecting.
>>8709049
Tantrum or not, still obnoxious, though.
>woman wearing lolita because she likes the clothes for the thrill of it
You have such an awesome coord. The print on your dress is great. You are lovely.
>man wearing lolita because he likes the clothes for the thrill of it
OMG. You're a sissy. It's a fetish for you. You probably wank off to your clothes at home. GTFO.
>>8709071
literally nobody said this, several posts said that if a brolita is clearly into the fashion, well dressed, and not creepy then it's a non-issue
why are y'all being so defensive, if you're not a creep or a sissy then you have nothing to worry about
>>8709090
>if you're not a creep or a sissy then you have nothing to worry about
This. They're just upset because they are creeps.
My comm is planning a few meets to donate to different charities like the local children's hospital and toys for tots. My favorite thing about my comm is how we try to give back to the community.
>>8709127
That's great anon! I never thought about doing anything like that
>>8709127
I've been thinking of suggesting a similar idea for my comm, as well. I hope yours go well, anon!
How about welcoming everyone regardless of gender and taking care of any weirdos/scammers/drama mongers as they come?
>>8709116
that makes as much sense as you being upset because you want to obsess over other girls without being judged.
>>8709127
Someone just got into the pdx comm and suggested it
I think more comms should do it
>>8709153
But anon, that makes too much sense. You can't get worked up over nothing if you adopt that attitude.
>>8709071
...
are you actually unable to differentiate between a hobby and a fetish?
>>8709174
a lot of anons have said they know there is a difference between male lolita and sissy or lonely guy looking to pick up chicks, but then they say they treat all men in the fashion differently because they ~might~ be an icky pervert.
>>8708880
Right, and no one in here is bullying or harassing anyone by posting ITT despite what you want to believe, people are sharing opinions and personal experiences - all of which you seem to be taking very personally. It's already been said that scammers (who exist in EVERY community, it is not a lolita-exclusive thing, it happens to every single community where things can be sold for money) get weeded out by comms, and it's true.
The shit stirrers are not the norm. People venting is normal, stirring shit is the stuff that most comms don't tolerate. Comms with toxic behavior are universally looked down upon here.
You cited the ATL comm which has gotten a ton of flak here for their members who have awful behavior. But you failed to notice that you are replying to a TON a of different people (who I bet are all in different comms) who have all had bad experiences with guys joining up. And no one is saying ban all men, just talking about feeling cautious.
>>8709172
Curse me and my logic!
>>8709049
It basically is a tantrum, they're acting like people want to ban men and like we all forgive scammers because they're women. It's ridiculous.
>>8709172
>girls being cautious of guys who join comms because there have been documented instances of perverts invading and even becoming violent
>"getting worked up over nothing"
>>8709189
no one said they treat them differently. they are just more cautious INITIALLY. if you're not a creep, they will not remain cautious, jesus christ
>>8708970
How are you not able to tell the difference between forcing your fetish I someone making then EXTREMELY uncomfortable and possible even harassing them and a few bitchy girls laughing about drama mongers on the internet? I'll take some asshole in the com talking behind my back over some humiliation play creep breathing down my neck any day. And like others have said, it's fairly easy to discern real brolitas from sissys.
>>8709258
>girls being cautious of joining comms because there have been documented instances of sadists running comms and even slashing tires with impunity
Like, John Leigh is a creep and a thief, so I won't go to AM, but I won't be scared of a random male running a convention just because of John's criminal activity. I'm cautious about strangers of any gender, but I'm not paranoid about an entire category of people because of the actions of others.
>>8709153 is just common sense.
I'm the anon who first posted about being cautious of brolitas
the creeps in this thread have answered my question
>>8709278
what creeps? can you point out where any anon was being creepy?
>>8709277
are you stupid?
a random guy running a con isn't likely to be getting off to it
the slashing tires incident was pretty extreme and doesn't happen regularly whereas sissies have tried to get into comms many times
also, girls ARE sometimes cautious of joining comms because of shit that has happened - but they join the comm and judge if its a good one or not. just like they will judge if a guy is a creep or not based on whether or not he acts like a fucking creep
it's been said already a few times, but if you're not a creep or a sissy then why are you so defensive? there is nothing wrong with being cautious based on past incidents
>>8709268
Holy typos. Sorry currently on mobile. Honestly the point is a lot of brolitas understand that they may not be received well at first because people have had a lot of bad experiences with men invading comms in the past. If they aren't willing to work and empathize with the girls and let them warm up to him then honestly he's most likely the type of person they're trying to avoid. The ones to throw tantrums and make huge sweeping generalizations about the girls legitimate concerns with males in the comm are the ones who are typically not safe.
>>8709285
sorry, but getting worked up over girls being cautious of men joining a fashion targeted at girls is creepy.
>>8709278
Now you sound like you were just fishing for reasons to confirm an existing bias. Most people in this thread are female. Guys on /cgl/ always announce their gender, didn't you know?
>>8703912
>Does anyone else feel sort of uncomfortable with guys joining their comm, even if they're brolitas?
No, but I feel uncomfortable with religious lolitas who believe in hell. That's really specific, but it's hard for me to trust the judgement of anyone who believes in a loving God that sentences anyone to eternal torment. I don't care if you judge my coord or makeup, but when you hang out with me and have tea with me and believe I'm damned for not following your religion... Super awkward.
>I know it's unfair to judge prematurely and the fashion should be for everyone and everything, but I just find something about it skeevy..
There isn't anything inherently skeevy about crossdressing. Do you feel grossed out by women in EGA?
>>8709299
How do you feel about Kamikaze Girls? You know it was written by a man, right?
>>8709299
>>8709313
Lolita fashion became more pronounced by Mana Sama who is also a man.
>>8709313
Love it, I'm not sure why you think it being made by a man matters. You clearly think this is some KILL ALL MEN thing but it's literally just being worried about creeps and weird fetishists trying to get off
>>8709307
Not really. There are guys in my comm already who I have no issue with because they are not creeps.
I only asked this question because I was recently at a convention where a few brolitas made me feel really uncomfortable. Before that I hadn't really thought much of it. I didn't realize it'd be such a touchy subject though.
>>8709307
>>8709336
Oops, didn't answer your last question - it's not about the crossdressing! Usually it's just the way they act and dress (doesn't seem genuine), but to be fair, it could be social awkwardness.
I did say that I knew it wasn't fair to prematurely judge. I do really think some of the defensive responses in this thread were a little offputting (dismissive of past instances), but I will be more open minded if new guys join my comm.
why are you so easy to troll, cgl? ffs, you've let a couple of assholes turn the comm thread into the #notallmen tag
severely disappointed
>>8709336
post some brolitas then who creeped you out. call them out.
>>8709333
stop shitting up the thread and just let it go anon
>>8709358
it was at a con, I don't know them anon, and anyway I will not call them out when I am not sure if they were creeps or just socially awkward
>>8709368
this is an anonymous board. name and shame rn.
>>8709370
what does that even have to do with anything
also
>it was at a con, I don't know them anon
>>8709166
...
What are you even trying to say?
>>8709298
>Honestly the point is a lot of brolitas understand that they may not be received well at first because people have had a lot of bad experiences with men invading comms in the past. If they aren't willing to work and empathize with the girls and let them warm up to him then honestly he's most likely the type of person they're trying to avoid.
i am a male ouji rather than a brolita, but this is one reason i did not join a comm until i had met members of the comm at a public convention.
it can be disheartening to know that people suspect you of being the type of person you have spent a lifetime disassociating yourself from. but, to me, as someone who feels nervous using the men's room in my frills, i cannot deny that there is reason to be cautious. it might not be fair, and it can make guys in jfash selfconscious, but it it's just the way things are. until there is a massive paradigm shift in how men interact with women in our society, it is reasonable to expect some caution.
>>8709370
>name and shame rn.
no witchhunts pls.
>>8709336
>I was recently at a convention where a few brolitas made me feel really uncomfortable.
if they do not show an interest in the fashion (names of brands, designers, historical figures/prints, etc.) i would write them off as dabbling for whatever reason. it is easy to spot the men (and women) who care about the fashion because they will A) have a lot of knowledge, and B) will not ask for handouts.
I feel really bad because I feel like I'm not good enough to be in my comm. I have a lot of self-esteem issues, so maybe that's it. But I still wish I could be a perfect Lolita with a perfect face so I wouldn't shit up the group pictures so much.
let's get back to bitching about comms
there's a newish girl in my comm who I already find irritating from FB alone, but I've noticed that she seems to be trying to get buddy-buddy with some other members of the comm. I don't think she's been to a meet yet, but she is friends with other members on FB (maybe thats normal?I don't add people unless I've met them.) but also replies to one of the mods comments with cringe-y comments that seem like she's trying to get on her good side. I could be seeing things that aren't there though because I find her annoying already but god it makes me salty
>>8709389
one thing i have noticed get a lot of comments on pics is when someone looks genuinely happy. she can be fat, or old, but seeing someone radiant with happiness brings a lot of positive responses.
so take care of your mental health above stressing out over your physical appearance. attitude is much more important.
>>8709389
Maybe you could post a group picture of your comm and we could point out itas? It may confirm or deny your fears, though I leading towards you not being as awful as you think. The worst ones usually aren't self-aware.
>>8709393
It sounds like she's just eager to make friends, some lolitas get really excited and want to dive in right away! I was eager to make new friends that had an interest in lolitas (especially if they've never met another Lolita before)
She just sounds excited
>>8709377
You are a true hero. It's really great to see you understand, but don't feel disheartened! A lot of girls love having brolitas and especially oujis in their comm, and it's not the idea of men cross dressing or being princely that bothers them, just the possibility that some may have ulterior motives. With your personality and attitude I'm sure girls would warm up to you very quickly if they even had any suspicions to begin with.
>>8709397
I'd rather not post a picture of my comm, but thank you for your reply. I guess I just want to be good enough for my friends. </3
>>8702842
What if I have a comm to add?
>>8709389
I'm sorry to hear that you feel that way. Honestly, even the most unattractive person who shows confidence looks great! Take time into planning your coords, use some makeup that compliments your face (and not some youtubers face only) and genuinely take pride in your appearance. If you can leave the house every single day thinking, yeah i look great today- you have won! But let's get real here, you probably are a normal Anon who looks just fine, probably far more cute than you think you are (most people are) and all you need is to work on your coords. Keep them simple but well put together, make sure they fit your body well and you can't go wrong. Even the most "ita" of all Itas i've seen would look pretty good with a little makeup, better fitting clothes, a simple but cohesive coord and a confident smile. So please, don't feel like the ugly duckling at prom when you go to a meet. Love yourself. you're amazing as long as you believe you are! Trust me, they will start to think so too if you show your confidence! I believe in you Anon!
>>8709167
That "someone" is known for using cgl constantly despite always falling for trolling and telling one of the mods she doesn't use cgl anymore. Not saying who because it'll summon her to make 10 posts defending herself anonymously.
>>8709333
>acting like "sama" is his last name
Haha get out, poseur.
>>8709983
True
I think it's a good idea, I may bring a toy or two to assist! I don't see why we don't do more things for charity, especially with the cost of some events.
I'd love to do some charity events!
>>8709798
email me: [email protected] (I've gotten several new/missing comms this way)
>>8709983
is it angel?
>>8710038
I'm pretty sure she doesn't selfpost in every single thread on the board unlike who I'm talking about. It's not hard to figure out.
Who fucking gives a shit. You all use 4chan, surely you know what men say about women? Most men are awful. I don't blame any woman who wants to exclude them for any reason.
>>8710092
>Most men are awful.
backtotumblr.jpg
Photos at comm events
I have an event coming up for a summer garden party that I'm hosting at my house and would like to do a spot for the comm to do individual photos in front of.
Everywhere else in my garden is quite informal so I thought making a nice girly space would be ideal for those who do CoF.
In the pic posted are some ideas, cost isn't a problem. I worry more about making it look photo-shoot perfect. So if any photography or hardcore selfie anons have any opinions I'd love to hear them
>>8709377
I hope you haven't made to feel like shit here, dude
Thank you for being decent and understanding. You are certainly not part of the problem but that doesn't make you blind to the fact there is one (in how other men can treat women). I sincerely hope the girls in your comm recognise and appreciate that empathy and treat you accordingly, like a friend and not a constant threat.
>>8710149
I love E so much. I think a neutral color might work best though since everyone will have different colored outfits.
A few months ago when I was still getting my feet wet in lolita I did some research and found a com in my area for future reference . fast forward to today when I'm trying to see if any of them are planning on going to holmats (I live in Fl) and the Facebook has been deleted and i can't find any mention of it anywhere.
>>8710448
Don't mind me, i found it, I just don't know how to use Facebook!
>>8710448
Use the link someone dropped to a googledoc earlier in this thread. Maybe it will have other comms on there in your state. I believe FL has 4 comms?
>>8702842
I dropped you an email about the Idaho comm because multiple people have ended up missing a lot of meets because of that bullshit 2nd group. It's the same comm, just a separate group for meets for some stupid reason.
>>8711140
Yep, I got it, I think I just typed the URL in wrong when I was trying to get to it myself so the googledoc saved me.
>>8710054
Carson?
There are people in my comm I absolutely despise for their behaviour outside of Lolita--nothing that's Lolita business but they're just obnoxious assholes in their everyday lives.
I'm not looking forward to ILD and putting up with looking at their stupid faces but I refuse to stop going to meet ups.
I need to move.
>>8712284
welcome to adult life tbqfh
>tfw blammed for blam evasion
>tfw I wasnt even being a cunt, I was being helpful in the taobao thread
ffs cgl is my only community participation of any sort
>>8712284
What did they do to piss you off so bad?
>>8712995
I keep seeing them get close to people, using them for love/attention/money and then second someone else needs anything they drop the fuck out them. I confess I was one of those people they used.
But it's nothing do with lolita, so I can't be like "hey so and so is a human leech.
>>8710149
Where is G from? I'd love that for my room.
>>8712989
gotta throw their weight around, CG.
meanwhile shitposters run amok and fuck up threads.
>>8713026
I've had experiences like that, and when I got my ass out of there they dragged my name through the mud and told a lot of lies. Watch yourself anon, trust no bitch.
I don't think my comm has anything planned for ILD yet. There are other meets planned around the date though, so maybe people are just busy that weekend? Beats me.
>go to meetup on Saturday
>we end up going to a local mall afterwards
>go to claire's
>employee gets really excited and starts talking about living dolls and the fucking MSE episode to her coworkers
>poor exhausted girl in my group goes over and desperately tries to explain that we are not in fact, living dolls
>this conversation takes like 10 minutes longer than it should because the employees are convinced living dolls and lolitas are the same thing
>finally in the way out
>employee stops us
>wants photo of us
>we end up on the instagram for that local claire's branch and put that we were lolitas in the description
it wasn't even a good photo either, everyone is awkwardly posed/has weird expressions, one girl had taken off her matching shoes and changed into moccasins, and a another girl was completely blocking a better dressed and all you could see was the top of her head
oh well. it was the end of the day and everyone was tired and they're all really nice girls. i just don't like that such an unflattering photo is representing the fashion
>>8713033
It's just paper pompoms, streamers and metallic ribbon hung on a curtain rod. If you want to replicate it, you'll need the big paper pompoms 16" diameter ones. Aliexpress and taobao have heaps for cheap.
Is there any point in going to a large ILD event if you have no friends attending?
Honestly, I feel like dropping out of my local comm. They're a different age group from me and even though I try to make conversation with them, I get the feeling that a lot of them are already friends. Every meet that requires payment ends up feeling like a waste of money.
>>8713678
I have tiers of friends--most of my lolita friends are acquaintance-friends that we can talk about loli and have a few laughs.
This is going to sound so pathetic...but I facebook friended a lot of lolis in my comm and then I sent them links of dresses and pop culture that I think they'll like as an excuse to start conversations and get to know them better and be their friend. That way when I see people we have stuff to talk about.
