In this thread we tell interesting dog storys.
>be me
>move houses
>be playing with soccer ball at new house
>ball goes over the fence
>pull myself up onto fence
>looks like nobody is home so jump over
>get ball
>WOOF.mp3
>picrelated.jpeg
>standing there with 1000 yard stare right through me
>fightorflight.exe
>clear 6ft fence in one go
>land on other side shaking
>cut leg
>fast forward a month
>dindu found in neighbours backyard
>dog locked onto his arm
>broken arm
>turns out he held him for 2 hours until other neighbours rang police and used fire extinguisher on him
>dog was capable of distinguishing between me and dindu
I once watched a semi-feral labrador called Fat Black Pig eat 4 heaped plates of mashed potatoes
>>2163631
Goddamn legend
>>2163584
You keep telling yourself that. You merely got away in time. An intruder is an intruder to guard dogs. It'll try to rape you regardless.
> be me 5 years ago
> roommate leaves house
> comes back a few min later
> "hey I found this puppy in the street"
> Street puppy a qt
> decide to keeping him
> pic related is my special guy a few weeks ago
>>2163686
Absolutely, he used to rule over the fields and disused wasteland behind a council estate, coming out to eat random shit and act aggressive.
Around the same time, at a kids birthday party I had the pleasure of watching the kid's mum lower the family dog's cock into a mug of cold water, because its constant erection was scaring some of the kids. Good times.
>>2163690
Not to Mastiffs, thats why they are such good guard dogs, they will think before they engage as opposed to GSDs or Dobermans.
>>2163840
>thinks dogs are inherently racist
What are you even saying? Its a guard dog it doesnt matter what your age or race is, its not going to discriminate your worth. You were lucky to get away. The intruder wasnt as lucky. Go try this theory again, please.
>>2163901
Where did he say the dogs were racist?
I understood his comment as mastiffs being able to understand a person's intent.
Recently adopted 3 legged dog. He is super athletic and jumps all over the furniture, is learning fetch, and can outrun other dogs of similar size.
When I walk down the street people call out from their cars or stop to try and pet him. A lot of people comment on how sorry they feel for him or how I'm a good person for taking a special needs dog. Wish they could see him hauling ass off the leash, then there wouldn't be such a pity party.
>>2164043
>>2163901
What experience do you have with mastiffs?
They are a passion of mine and I am well read on them, though I dont bother with fancifull breeders publications talking about Roman war dogs, Giant English dogs the romans encountered etc etc.
I own a Neapolitan cross.
My cousin has an unsocialised pack made up of 2 Neapolitan Crosses and 3 Dogue de Bourdeuxs on his farm.
My Brother has a Dogue de Bourdeux x Bullmastiff
My friend has an ultimate mastiff (dogue de bourdeux x neapolitan).
From observing Mastiffs, especially the unsocialised pack, Mastiffs do analyse and despite the sloppy looking faces there is a highly intelligent dog doing its job correctly. I think alot of people think intelligence in a dog is measured by its trainability. You can train them you just need to communicate why you want them to do X.
>>2163901
>>2163903
>be dog
>guarding home
>hear and smell guy that lives next door moving around on the other side of the fence
>he's over in his territory so its all good
>suddenly something lands in yard
>intruder?
>no, just ball
>ball is clearly too big to fit in mouth- not good ball
>see neighbor pull himself up on the fence
>he doesn't see me
>he jumps over
>goes and gets his dumb big ball
>well, he's got what he came for. I'd better remind him whose space he's in before he gets comfy
>WOOF
>he looks at me like a deer in the headlights
>books it back over the fence
>yard is safe
>am good dog
>be me many years ago
>on long road trip
>at a park
>run around with my dogs because its fun and i was a child
>was very fun
>time to leave park
>get dog in car
>let him sit by me
>he got car sick
>threw up all over my lap
>had to sit there for hours or so witg vomit on me
>still love him
Pic is of my vomit dog
>few years ago
>take a dog with a pack of puppies away from someone that couldnt keep them/her
>we give out puppies from our home
>some douchebags come on a motorcycle from a place thats about 45 mins away
>want to put puppy in a draw string bag
>ohfuckno.jpg
>mom tells them no
>the man gets mad and starts arguing
>stroms off
>my dog (not the mother of puppies) runs up and bites the asshole on the ass
>his wallet falls out
>he didnt even notice
>dog runs away (in our yard) with his wallet
>after many keks we call the man back to give him his wallet
Pic is of my theif dog
>>2164113
Stop lying Ruckus
>hanging out with doggo at pet store
>Some lady walks by us
>Doggo jumps and swipes the toy right out of the lady's hand
Thank God everyone thought my piss poor trained dog was hilarious and super cute. He is as dumb as a rock and has real bad issues with toys.
Friends....treeing walker coon hound and 6 to 10 week old raccoon.
Wandered into our garage, family dead or he may have been the runt. Found a home...
>>2164575
Little more merit this way...
>>2164319
Always nice to have bad behavior mistaken for cute
>be young and dumb German Short haired Pointer
>Have literally an half acre of a fenced off back yard to fuck around in with all the toys in the world
>instead decide I want to be an inside dog all the time
>cause 70,000 in damage to 11 French doors
>jump into mom's land cruiser and eat wallet, palm pilot
>jump out and eat mud flaps off car
>finally be let inside
>piss on everything
>go for car ride
>lose nuts
Goddamn Shinerbock was a crazy ass puppy.
Even fucking fractured his tooth prying off a 2x4 off a fence to get out of the back yard.
He even stares at the ceiling for half the day for no reason.
>watching euro cup with family and dog
>dog chilling on sofa
>Boatebg scores
>everyone clapping and shouting
>dog jumps off couch and looks at us
>he's constantly licking his nose
>probably got spooked as hell by the sudden noise
>licking stops after a minute
>he's acting completely normal now
poor guy. I guess he's happy Germany is out now.
Any idea what happened? It really reminded my of shellshock so i was scared shitless for a moment.
>>2164735
Just has no conceptual ability to understand that you're excited over the tv. Everyone was chillin then suddenly everyone was yelling...good team score or bad team? Bad team woes and he may have panicked thinking everyone was in distress...fire, predator, hoomans mad! Good team cheers and he's just like wtf nothing is going on. Did he shake some? Just pet him and tell him not you
>>2164578
Being cute is his saving grace. I cannot get him to exist in reality outside the home despite having gone through 2 trainers with him AND him being a few months shy of 2. I know I am trash at dog training, but at the same time, I sincerely suspect he is literally doggy retarded.
My other dog is already better behaved than him, and I have never honestly given her any one-on-one training time.
>>2164107
My dog did this when I picked him up from the breeder. I should've expected it since he was so young and had never been in the car before but it surprised me. It's surprising how not gross vomit is when it comes from a cute puppy
>be me
>have goldendoodle mini named Grendel
>Grendel is chilling on couch
>go upstairs to play vidya
>check on him
>he's not there
ohshit.jpg
>look through doggy door to poo yard
>don't see him
>look through house
>don't find him
>go outside to poo yard
>gate to backyard is open
>he isn't in the poo yard
>get scared
>run out into the back yard looking for him
>can't find him
>get even more scared
>run around backyard trying to find Grendel
>go inside to try to get phone to call police
>he's inside wondering what was wrong
>I hug him hard
>>2166332
>be goldendoodle mini named Grendel
>chilling on couch
>master goes upstairs
>need to shit
>shit in poo yard
>hear doggy door open
allofmywut.png
>run inside
>look around
>where is master?
>he runs in
>hugs me
>>2166332
> goldendoodle mini
what the fuck are you talking about that's called a mutt or mongrel
>go outside to poo yard
you're disgusting
>go inside to try to get phone to call police
>hello police? my dog has been gone for like a minute and a half... well, I checked the poo yard... the part of my property that me and my whole family only use for shitting... but no, I did not look for him at all... he's a goldendoodle mini named Grendel... it's a new and exciting breed featuring the dominant traits from a wide variety of dogs... oh nevermind he was inside the whole time
>wants to play fetch
>brings me ball, drops it and waits for me to throw it.
>too retarded to understand the full concept of fetch.
>brings ball back
>won't drop ball
>still wants human to throw ball
>continuously mash face into my palm and whine because he doesn't understand why the ball is not being thrown
>eventually give up.
>walk across the room and fall asleep with ball still in mouth
>>2166372
Bathe in the glory of the Miniature Goldendoodle.
The "poo yard" is also just the dog's shitting yard.
>be 18 driving around with the gf
>2am, Jan, snow everywhere
>Dog runs out in front of the car
>Slam breaks and get out to call doggo
>See it's a pitbull now running at me at warp speed
>Maintain cool, mentally shit myself
>Doggo suddenly stops three feet in front of me, spins in a circle and run off wagging its tail with a shit eating grin
>Spend the next 15 minutes running around with it because it wants to play tag
>Get doggo but parents won't even let me put him in the basement u til morning because pitbull
>No collar, goofy and friendly as fuck and we all chill out in my truck
>Knock on some known-pit owners door in case it might be there's
>Gfs mom is angry she's not home yet, neither of us can take doggo so we call the police station next to the shelter
>Tell us they will open a kennel for It
>Get there and get reamed out for picking up a dangerous dog despite theyre petting it and baby talking it
>Go out to the parking lot to leave
>Dog zips by us, three police officers after it
>Dumbass let go of the leash
>Spent the next 25 minutes chasing a dog with six police officers in a parking lot at 3am until one of it got it with a hot dog
>Ticket my gf for not having her driver's license
>>2166422
Another police story
>Walking to the super market
>Two police officers in an empty parking lot with a teeny tiny malionos(I can't remember how to spell it) playing fetch with it
>Pupper sees me and brings ball over
>Police invite me to play with pupper
>They use me to try and teach pupper not to bring the ball too and not listen to me when I call it
>Doesn't work so we all just play with pupper
>Good times were had
