So about a month ago I had my first acid trip. At first things were fine then I started to peak and that's when shit broke down. I began having panic attacks and intense anxiety that my closest homes who were tripping with me might actually be playing a cruel prank on me and I became paranoid. During those 3 weeks I began to seriously think that I might be crazy or mentally retarded.
What didn't help is that the day after my trip I met with my therapist and told me that I have an avoidant personality. I didn't know how to react APD is often associated with multiple personality disorder or borderline personality disorder. When I asked him if I was mentally retarded or maybe even autistic he only replied with a curt "oh come on anon you're not retarded."
Am I really going crazy or is it the effects of the acid?
>>17154802
So your symptoms are you think you might be crazy?
Sometimes acid is known to help surface psychological disorders that would have inevitably surfaced anyways, I.E. with schizophrenia, and never or rarely causes it.
I'm not sure about personality disorders though? It might just be a coincidence. So basically either that or the acid brought it on earlier and it was inevitable.
BTW you are not even retarded or crazy, APD is the most inoffensive of all of them IMO even though it will cause you difficulties, personality disorders are categorized into clusters. Cluster A is the ones that cause you to act weird/eccentric, like schizoid personality disorder, cluster B is the dramatic ones, borderline personality disorder and histrionic etc, while cluster C is nervous/anxious disorders like what you are experiencing. So it is completely different from BPD etc. Hope this helps.
>>17154802
>I didn't know how to react APD is often associated with multiple personality disorder
No. Dissociative Identity Disorder isn't something that just happens. If you don't have prolonged, severe abuse in your history you don't have Dissociative Identity Disorder. I mean locked in a closet unless daddy wants to fuck you from six to fifteen level abuse. Are many people with DID also Avoidant? Sure, its a strong association, but it runs one way.
>borderline personality disorder
No. There isn't an association between Cluster B and C. While I can imagine someone who might be a blend, it certainly isn't something you're going to see in the wild very often.
>mentally retarded or maybe even autistic
Mental retardation is a pretty specific diagnosis. If you don't have cognitive abilities two standard deviations below the mean (fuck you, DSM5, the cut off is useful) with an onset during childhood and pervasive dysfunction across all domains of life its not a diagnosis even worth considering. A Spectrum diagnosis isn't wholly out of the picture, and it is consistent with some of what you're reporting, but you'd need testing to confirm.
Heres a scary thought: maybe you've looked avoidant or possibly Aspergian throughout adolescence because of a slow Schizophrenia prodrome and the use of psychedelics pushed you towards your first psychotic episode.
Had any bad fevers or unexplained illnesses lately?
>>17154802
Anon, I experienced pretty much exactly what you described about two years ago. Weed + Lsd. Have had recurring panic attacks since then and flashbacks. One month it happened i still felt fucked, but things are much better now. Panic attacks got more and more rare, and less intense every time. Why do you think you're going crazy? For me it was paranoïa, HPPD, and random psychotic thoughts. I've chilled with drugs (more into stimulants now) concentrated on school, started working out, and things are better. My therapist taught me anyi-anxiety techniques which help ALOT. Learn them. Slow breathing and muscle relaxing. This is a way to control your own anxiety, it's pretty sweet. Best of luck OP, your situation sucks a lot. If your friends are not supportive, get new ones. Serious.
It sounds like anxiety to me. Having a bad trip like that can make you feel anxious for a while after. One LSD trip can't cause schizophrenia/HPPD/insanity, only heavy use and abuse of it can.
APD is in no way similar to BPD or DID. I have BPD, in fact. The only similarity is that anxiety is a related factor. You are just a person who worries, naturally. Luckily, it can't make you go crazy. You'll be just fine.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder
>>17156011
>One LSD trip can't cause schizophrenia/HPPD/insanity, only heavy use and abuse of it can.
Hallucinogens in general cannot cause Schizophrenia. Even one trip can hasten something already on it's way, though. If someone has ANY family history of Bipolar I or psychotic level dysfunction they need to stay far away from psychedelics and pot.
>>17155872
OP here
It's possible but there's no way I could tell.
I don't recall any illnesses unless a cold or flu count. Although I just assumed they were caused by a lack of hygiene on my part.
>>17156011
That's what I'm assuming and being active does seem to help alleviate some of the anxiety but I still spend a lot of time trying to reassure myself that I'm not psychotic.
