>broke up with ex, she moved out
>she wants to get back together
>I tell her I can't do the same thing we were and that it wasn't working, but I'm willing to be in a relationship with her that looks different, and that I'm going to sleep with other people
>she's okay with that
>she gets her own house, relationship gets better, she still has issues but distance helps that not affect the relationship
>I still tell her I'm going to sleep with other girls but haven't yet (other self-improvements take priority over dating)
>unhappy about it that but seems to accept it
>life goes on, thinking about dating now, not sure what to do with this
first of all, am I fucking up, here? I feel pretty stable with it, but it seems complicated as fuck. for some reason I feel pretty confident with it, but I also feel like it might make me kind of an asshole, I can't decide.
second, how the fuck would I approach girls when I have a girlfriend in a non-monogamous sense anyways? Do I just lay that shit out on the table or what?
>>17152113
>first of all, am I fucking up, here?
Yeah, you're holding your relationship hostage and the ransom is you get to fuck other girls. She was desperate to get you back and now you're taking advantage of the desperation to fuck other girls.
You and I both know she doesn't want you to fuck other girls she just said she's okay with it because you gave her a take it or leave it ultimatum.
Listen, man, if this is how you want to play it I'm not really in a position to tell you you shouldn't but don't be under any illusion about it; what you're doing is pretty shitty.
If you want to continue to fuck with this girls head and use her own lack of self-esteem against her then I'm not really here to shame you for it, I'm just letting you know that you are in fact being an asshole.
If being an asshole is your thing, that's cool. Its kind of my thing too.
>>17152142
has it
why be in this "relationship" at all if you aren't even going to try to make it work? Just stop wasting everyone's time and work towards an actual end goal, not some stupid shit that you're doing now.
>>17152152
I am trying to make it work - I'm just no longer trying to make it work like a "normal" relationship. What should my end goal be if not to maintain a functioning relationship while having sex with other women? Seems like a good goal to me, it's just >>17152142 that, which I'm concerned about.
>>17152142
Am I really holding it hostage, though? If a girl wants to get a guy to commit to monogamy before she has sex with him, is she holding the relationship hostage, too? Negotiation isn't hostage-taking, I was going to walk away, she asked, and I set my terms. I'm not trying to be a dick or hurt her (just like I wasn't when I broke up with her), I'm just stating what will work and what won't, and the former terms of the relationship weren't working.
>>17152285
>What should my end goal be if not to maintain a functioning relationship while having sex with other women?
As you stated in the OP, she is unhappy with it.
Don't kid yourself.
>>17152285
>Am I really holding it hostage, though?
>f a girl wants to get a guy to commit to monogamy before she has sex with him, is she holding the relationship hostage, too?
> I was going to walk away, she asked, and I set my terms. I'm not trying to be a dick or hurt her (just like I wasn't when I broke up with her), I'm just stating what will work and what won't, and the former terms of the relationship weren't working.
No, what you are is a manipulative cunt with your wordplay because you don't want to accept the responsibility of being a cunt. You will shove example after example to absolve yourself of the responsibility of what you are doing to this girl, and try to manipulate the scenario to make you seem like you are being reasonable. When you're not.
You're not fooling anyone here with your shit mate.
Dude, she is going to get sick of your shit and selfishness, sleep with someone else, and your relationship is going to be kill.
I warned you. Commit or get the fuck out.
