Is cheating a part of all people's lives? Like, has everyone cheated/been cheated on at some point?
Pretty much.
It seems like it always happens eventually, it's just a matter of time.
>>17158590
You know, as I grew up I thought of it as something that was very rare. It seems like it happens all the time now that I'm older
>>17158602
I was actually on the other half of the spectrum. I lost my father when I was quite young, so it wasn't odd to see many romantic partners come in and out of my mother's life.
In some cases, I had the opportunity to see what was happening on both sides. So perhaps I was a little bit more sensitive to it.
With my first girlfriend, I was dead set on this never becoming an issue. I didn't want to create some toxic relationship where one person felt that they couldn't get out of it if it wasn't what they wanted. Well, I guess that didn't work very well. Despite my best efforts, and despite thing going seemingly fine, even at a time when I felt we were both satisfied with our relationship, I'd come to find that she was actively seeking out her ex-boyfriend and sending him pictures and live video of her doing things. That kind of crushed me a bit. It was nothing that I'd really done, our relationship was pretty healthy. It was just some seed planted in the back of her mind that eventually germinated, I suppose.
I found out that during a one week little, "Break" we had taken, she'd gone and fucked another guy, too.
I've seen friends cheated on, loved ones, I've seen people, my own mother, think about cheating on others....
I don't know what to think.
>>17158650
Thi idk what the fuck people thinks
Hypergamy which leads to degeneracy because people are short sighted and want instant gratification. This all justified by self serving non-arguments of the post modernistic moronic crowds of today.
>>17158897
>crowds of today
>"born in the wrong generation" bullshit
Cheating has been around since the dawn of time, you can't blame everything on one generation.
>>17158582
It gives you like 15% satisfaction and 85% guilt.
>>17158582
>has everyone cheated/been cheated on at some point?
I'm 25, have been in multiple relationships and never cheated or been cheated on, at least to my knowledge.
I think it has less to do with our "generation" and more to do with the kind of person you're attracted to.
We're all subconsciously attracted to a certain kind of person. If you're subconsciously attracted to dishonest, cheating women due to some strange psychological childhood development then you'll probably get cheated on, a lot.
The things we go through in our relationships are more of a reflection on us than it is on the people we find ourselves in relationships with.
>>17158582
only a part of marriage buddy
For whores, retarded chads, and kids, yes.
Adults usually to not succumb to this level of betrayal knowing what it does to the other person.
>>17158582
>>17158987
Same as you. 25, no cheating or been cheated on.
The cheating culture is all over media. Spend a day watching mainstream movies on Netflix. I'd venture to say a large percentage (at least 25%) involve either cheating or divorce. I mean even looking at some of the most popular shows that were on TV in the past few years, Breaking Bad (Walt's wife was sleeping with her boss), Son's of Anarchy (lots of characters cheated), Orange is the New Black (Piper's pregnant friend sleeps with the jewish guy), etc.
I can't even list all the movies where it's just like.. it seems they're at the point where if a character cheats, it isn't something that is even worth breaking up over. It's treated as excusable.
Strange culture we live in.
>>17158582
Im 25 been with my girlfriend since we were around 16. Cheated on her a couple of times when i was around 18. Now we live together and are probably going to get married. Its nothing that will ever get out but the guilt still hits me every so often for a couple of days and it fucking sucks. So not worth it.
>>17159945
Agree not worth it. An it will hunt u till the end of your days. We will never betray again. Lesson learned!
>>17158582
Well i tried it & got caught lost some self respect.
However my friend does it constantly & enjoys the web of lies, hiding things etc. Considers it a challange in life
>>17160574
Oh I feel so sorry for his/ her partner. Could only imagine getting some crazy STD from that kind of shit.
Woman here
Got cheated on my both of my shut in loser ex's and that's why I only date normie chads. For me and my friends, a geeky circle of girls who cosplay,watch Chinese cartoons and play vidya, it's always the guys who play excessive amounts of dota who cheat on us.
It's happened 6 times between all 4 of us, it's become an injoke in our circle.
I theorize that it's due to men who play excessive amounts of vidya online are just meeting people every day and socialize a lot online, and since I'm from a small country it's more likely you'll meet people irl from online
F22, never cheated or been cheated on. None of my friends have been cheated on either. To my knowledge of course.
No, but I wouldn't be surprised if it were more than 50%. Personally I've cheated twice, on the same girl. She didn't find out but I ended up breaking up over unrelated reasons.
>>17159566
I don't dissagree with this, but it's very naive.
>venture to say a large percentage (at least 25%) involve either cheating or divorce.
We got statistics for divorce, and it's somewhere around 50% of all marriages, gone down slightly since the nineties, I think. Of the remaining % who never get divorced, we're likely to find at least half of these will be in relationships where cheating happens. And then we got some where sleeping with other people isn't considered cheating, as in open relationships and swingers. The remaining 15-25% of people who are together with their partners until they die, and never sleep with anyone else, often are either very religious, boring, miserable or have lower libido.
It's only considered wrong because the church doctrines that put the laws of marriage forth in society told humanity it was, and it's supported by Disney fantasies. Fact of the matter is human beings are very sexual creatures, and it's stupid to believe there's some universal puritan force in place, that we go against by acknowledging we can be drawn to more than one person physically. Acting on it should be something agreed upon between the parties involved, and people who want open relationships but cheats instead are fucking cowards.
Also, don't believe everything Hollywood tells you.
It's a massive part of my life. Been in love twice, both with girls in relationships, they liked me and acted on it. The first ended her relationship but didn't stay with me either.
The second is on going. No idea how its going to pan out, but it's not going to end well.
Also, my parents cheated when I was a kid.
>>17158582
I haven't been cheated, that I know about. I did cheat on one of my exes, it was like 12 years ago and I still regret doing it.
Never been cheated on, but I have been with a married women.
>>17158582
The kind of reasons that makes me want to become a single father through surrogacy desu
Everyone is someone else's cuck
>>17159945
Male/23
I found out 2 months ago that this girl i've been dating with a year slept with a former best friend 4 times
we opened up about everything, about our feelings, how things played out, etc.. leaving no stone left unturned.
dumped this girl have since and then tried to move on and had sex with 3 women multiple times off of okcupid. still currently seeing one...
anyways this girl still wants to date me and is begging me to stay. she bawls and had initially even attempted self harm (ate 30 klonpins). she's leveled out though and is in treatment.
saying i still don't have feelings for her would be a straight up lie. but my anger and resentment outweigh those.
what are your guy's general feelings on getting back with a cheating partner??
would getting back with a cheating person later after going ones separate way still make you a 'cuck'?
i've come along way but still feel angry and humiliated still.
just trying to get a general sense for personal reflection. ultimately i see no hope in this..
any experience here with cheating?
anyone take back a cheating partner
>>17160780
I got back with my girl, but she didn't physically cheat, just caught her sending nudes and talking to dudes online sexually.
Still resent her every day we spend together, and she can tell. But, all in all it's going well.
She knows what she did to me, exactly how it effected me, and being around her everyday to live and remind her of the shitty person she once was gives me a lot of self confidence to be honest.
Not with her, but in life. She owes me everything, because I pretty much saved her and gave her a life she'd never be able to have, and she turned around and fucked me over. So, having her feel shitty for the rest of her life around me is great.
>>17158582
I've never cheated, been cheated on or been involved in cheating. Definitely know a lot of cheaters though.
You know what it is? Just children of divorce repeating their parents mistakes because they think it's normal.
>>17160856
i have never cheated and never got cheated on. know a lot of cheaters too.
but my parents divorced too and i don't think it's a good indicator for people cheating later on. i do agree that it MIGHT be that kids from divorced homes never learned about how to maintain a healthy realtionship. but in my case, i had absolutely NO idea and had to lear it all on my own and from scratch. that has advantages too. you have to make conscious decisions on how you develope and have realtionships in every aspect.
>>17160864
Not saying it's inevitable, obviously there's lot's of people who's parents had a bad relationship but they're smart enough to learn from their mistakes.
But all the cheaters I know excuse it by saying "well it's normal, I'm sure my partners done it too" and it becomes apartment they get that idea from their parents dishonest behavior.
Unfortunately in America like 50% of people get divorced so cheating probably is common.
>>17160875
yeah. have to agree with you on that. but why is it so common? are we truly not capable of monogamy or are we just fucked up?
>>17160772
>Everyone is someone else's cuck
It's the 21st century, cuck or get cucked
I've never been cheated on
Cause I've never been in a relationship
>>17158582
First off, people are so varied that nothing will describe everyone
>inb4 hur dur we all human
No we aren't, have you been to Chicago?
2nd, cheating is a learned habit. It can be corrected, but like anything else the transgressor needs to feel guilt and actively want to change.
3rd, alot of guys are horrible at body language and communication in general i.e. "reading women." There's a sizable junk that says they are and it's probably because they can understand when a club whore wants to fuck. The best way to tell if you're a good communicator is if you have never been cheated on.
There is an idea going around that all relationships inevitably end and become miserable or shitty. But that's just not the case. I've been in one bad relationship and am currently in quite a strong one and the difference is enormous.
When my last gf cheated on me it wasn't exactly a shock. I was constantly waiting for it to happen every time she went out with her friends. Now, I don't even really think about it as a serious possibility and I probably won't unless our relationship changes a lot.
>>17160892
It's not really that common. I read somewhere that something like 50% of might cheat in a relationship, but that's only a 1/2 chance in all relationships.
I'm sure you've met quite a few people in really terrible relationships, right? So just knowing those people exists puts the odds in your favor as long as you aren't a dick.
>>17160596
>meeting people every day and socialize a lot online
but that exactly a normie chad non-chads don't like to socialize or meet people. chads like to play video game now and all of you dated chads.
>>17158582
I'm a decent guy who likes decent girls, and grew up around decent people in general so it hasn't been a big thing in my life.
Though i have to admit, a lot of us are the kids/grandkids of asian/indian/eastern-european/etc immigrants, western europeans seem to be much more fond of fthis behavior.
[spoiler][/spoiler]
I'm always disturbed to hear all the stories on here taking cheating so lightly, as if it's something normal.
I learned that I had to control my dick, not let it control me.
Would never consider cheating. Not respectful to the other person in the relationship.
And betraying the trust of a loved one is a violation of almost every major moral code.
We call it "infidelity" for a reason.
>>17160596
That's interesting. In my experience, the exact opposite is true: that's likely because the ones who sit inside and play LoL/starcraft/etc are the ones with extremely harsh parents (often japanese, chinese, korean) that forced them to focus on academics instead of socialization, and drilled it into them that such actions would be an unspeakable shame upon the family. That they'd disown them for even thinking about it.
The ones with healthy social lives are the ones whose parents were lenient and let them do whatever they want: they never had extreme discipline or a harsh moral code beaten into them, so they're much more likely to cheat.
Plus there's the effect like pic related: they're more likely to know how to charm a woman into bed in the first place.
Hard to imagine the shut-in starcraft pros getting even one girl, much less two!
Out of curiosity, what country are you from?
>>17160780
>still make you a 'cuck'?
Depends whether she has actually changed.
Getting back with her won't make you a cuck if it never happens again and you live happily ever after: in that case, you made the right judgement call. She was immature and made a childish mistake, and you knew when to forgive her for it.
But if it happens again, you'll be a gigantic, ultra, turbo-cuck and we'll all rightfully laugh at your poor judgement.
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.
I technically cheated once. The day before I broke up with my partner. I felt guilty. Not because of my partner, they never found out and they were physically and emotionally abusive which pushed me into it. I felt guilty because I had lost my moral high ground in the situation and I know I could have done better than that. Like no matter how bad my partner treated me I could have just walked away. I won't ever do it again now that I know how low it makes me feel.
The fact that people cheat this easily is one of the reasons i have trust issues.
>>17161071
I don't think you're a cuck if someone cheats on you, you're a cuck if someone cheats on you and you forgive/forget or just let it keep happening
>>17160617
You do know there are actual people out there who are happy with each other and don't cheat out of love and loyalty, right?
>>17160780 here
>>17160839
>>17161071
yeah, despite being apart she has been catering to me completely emotionally and physically. i don't know how i feel about her feeling shitty and being at my whim all the time. i guess i appreciate, allow, and understand the sentiment, but it feels pretty sad and just weird since i'm not the type of person to get pleasure out one like that really. to each their own...
she's striving to do everything to get back together with me. i'm confused, still hurting, but ultimately going my own way by seeing other people and trying to sort my own self out.
she says she understands my anger and resentment but is willing to cope with it just as long as i'm with her. she's realized ''i'm her soul mate and all she wants in life''.
lol the really fucked up part is that the circle of friends me and this dude are in are still tight with him and treating everything as if nothing happened, which i understand to an extent but everything is still unsettling. LOL, I even had another guy from that circle text my ex and try to initiate conversation and 'hang out'. she shot him down and told him it was out of line and not in her or his place to pursue anything like that right now. she forwarded me all of this as it went.
b/c of this unnecessary shit and other reasons, i told her i'm considering on relocating to a new undisclosed spot or new city just to get away from all of this noise back home/career opportunities (college grad living in nyc). says she's willing to drop/transfer everything for me. so yeah. this is kinda off putting but her sentiments i guess...
do i think she'll cheat on me again later on? knowing her and the shit that we've been through b/c of this? no, i dont..
do i want to? not anytime soon.
i have the feeling (at times concerned) however that if she does come back into the picture later, maybe something might try to be worked out...
only time will tell...
![364[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/UdzC67M.jpg "364[1].jpg")
>>17160617
>there's something wrong with the people who DON'T cheat
Never cheated on my ex. Got close (but I was breaking up with her the next day). I can sort of see why people do it, but the relationship had run its course.
It's hard to trust anybody these days, cheating has been around forever that's a given. It's just too bad that people who claim they "hate cheating" are suspiciously hiding something back. I was cheated on by a girl who absolutely despised cheating or at least that's what she said until I was at my absolute weakest without any thought about it in my mind only to find out months later about the dirty deed.
Now it's hard to trust anything that person says and honestly any future girl won't be getting the benefit of the doubt.
Sometimes I think about "cheating" on a girl I'm seeing. She thinks were in a serious relationship and I don't, she's never really been in a serious relationship and thats part of the problem. I'd probably sleep with someone reasonably attractive if I were drinking but I know I'd feel like shit afterwards.
i can see why people cheat its nice to feel wanted and special.
>>17158582
>OP bumpin'
I cheated on my girlfriend once when I was on holiday, regretted it and decided I'd never do it again. We broke up, but I have never cheated on a girl since
>>17161864
I didn't say people can't be happy for many years. But eventually 50% get divorced for some reason or other, and the remaining 50% are divided into cheaters, people who are in open relationship (can absolutely be happy), and various degrees of pleased and miserable. I didn't say that boring/low sex drive people aren't happy, I for one just wouldn't want to end up like that.
>>17162120
The reason cheating exist is because monogamy is unnatural is all I'm saying. It's still wrong to cheat, the only thing right is to acknowledge that being open to the fact that at some point most partners will experience sexual feelings for someone else than their spouse, so it's a question of whether it's right to suppress those feelings or not. They way I see it, everyone who feels trapped in a relationship, no matter if it's been four months or forty years, usually feel so because of what they're missing out on outside of the relationship, sexually or otherwise.
>>17163830
>monogamy is unnatural
That's odd. Because it feels natural to a large amount of people.
What's UNNATURAL is to enter into a monogamous relationship, which is an unwritten contract to be with one person while not taking that seriously.
>he only thing right is to acknowledge that being open to the fact that at some point most partners will experience sexual feelings for someone else than their spouse,
At some point most partners will probably want to throttle their partners as well. In fact you can extrapolate that to real life with interaction with anyone. If a guy pisses me off and I get angry and want to punch him, doesn't mean it's okay to do so. Laws aside here, it still wouldn't be okay regardless. Just because some sort of emotion comes in the heat of the moment it doesn't mean that it's justified to do it.We are more civilized/intelligent than any raw emotion we feel. That probably says more about the person who is unable to control their emotions/unhealthy than it does with the way things are.
I think cheating implies a serious relationship. I don't think I'd cheat (didn't for a 10 year relationship) but I'm surely not monogamous on casual relationships. I imply or tell them this directly. I also give them the opportunity to go out with other people, so I think I'm fair, but I don't want to hurt anyone so I'm always afraid that they'd think we are exclusive and be hurt by it. But it's cringey to say "I'm fucking other people"! I've said it one though even though I wasn't to not hurt this person. Most affectionate person I've been with! If she wasn't so old (I want children and it takes time to know people) we'd be dating. We're still good friends and now she knows I wasn't seeing anyone else and appreciate for my attitude.
Such is life.
>>17158987
thought the same thing at some point of life then i got cheated on.
that feel sucks i don't wish that on anybody even less in a person who i am affectionate with.
if you feel trapped in a relationship you should be honest and talk about it.
>a lot of people have low-self esteem
>a lot of people who cheat have extremely low-self esteem.
>almost everyone gets cheated on in this generation
>its WAY easier to cheat than ever before
>girls feel empowered when they cheat like they're an autistic 007 or they're some absolute genius.
>guys cheat because they literally can't think without their dick
>Girls literally can message 1 of the 100 guys constantly blowing up their phone with dick pics and say "lel wana fuk" and that's it.
>Guys will stick their dick in anything.
Getting cheated on or cheating in this time period is like losing your baby teeth, it's literally bound to happen, that's why casual relationships are becoming more of the norm.
And that's why being fuck buddies with someone is the only way, relationships just don't make any sense anymore, they're boring and too exclusive in a society that literally lives by a Y0l0 xD mentality.
>>17160596
>being in a relationship with a dotard
Only LoL would be worse
>>17160596
tfw pretty much a shut in, can't even get one girl, let alone cheat on one. Were they like skinny twink lads or something?
>>17158897
This
>>17158952
You're an idiot, nobody is arguing for exclusivity
It's all trend
>>17160617
>grasping for straws:the post
>degeneracy: the post
I ain't even religious
My first girlfriend cheated on me. I was completely loyal.
When I asked her why her answer was "I wanted to see what it was like"
It affected me emotionally a lot and I've never been the same since. The guy was a complete Chad and incredibly muscular. It destroyed my already low self confidence in irreparable ways.
I had difficulty trusting women and become incredibly anxious at attaching myself to women and constantly paranoid. I still have very low self confidence and still feel broken.
Now I'm in a different relationship. I have a gf that I cheat on. She's really good to me and I feel terrible about it.
It's part fear, part crippling low self esteem and loneliness, and another due to mismatched labidos. Mostly it started out as a huge fear that I will get too close and be hurt.
Fucked up I'm doing the exact same thing that's been done to me
>>17160596
wanna fug? pls be from Zurich
>>17164191
Leave her then ass
>>17164245
Why?
>>17164258
Uh because you are using her and cheating on her? Are you that stupid that you don't get why you should and are expected to leave? If you can't be faithful then don't be in a relationship. You are ruining her time she could be spending with a real man.
There is never a reason to cheat. Never.
Cheaters are disgusting and should just die in a muddy ditch.
Never take a cheater back, never get into a relationship with somebody who has cheated. They can't be trusted, ever.
>>17158582
It is until it isn't. I'm old. Married to a woman I've known and been together with, on and off, for more than twenty years.
Parts of our relationship were long distance, during which we both cheated, more or less--we had a sort of don't ask/don't tell open relationship. Because we were idiots in love, we told each other anyway, and were both furious and disgusted for a while. Nearly broke up. Then we figured out that we wanted to he with each other more than we wanted to be apart, and more than we wanted to fuck other people. So we quit fucking around, got engaged, and have been successfully monogamous for more than thirteen years. It was a deliberate choice, one that almost anyone can make (if you can't, you either should not be with the person or you shouldn't be monogamous), and one I'm glad we made.
