Holy shit that is deep.Wouldn't say i feel the same since am not in your shoes but i can fucking relate.Why did you fall inlove with her cause she sounds like a bitch no offence

Scuse me sir. You need God. Seriously, no joke no puns, go and talk to a pastor. You will feel better.

>>17131547
We weren't in love. I didn't know her long at all. I saw her at work and was too nervous to say anything. She added me on Facebook and began to talk to me. Quickly found out we were so alike it was a little freaky. It turned flirtatious. The way she spoke to me gave me the goosebumps. Talking about how "this is just the beginning" and other future tense statements. We saw the sunset, held hands, and kissed at the end of the night. It was fairy-tale like in my head. The morning after she just felt the complete opposite. She had been single for so long and the fact we moved so quick I guess it just scared her. Our conversations dwindled to nothing. Now we haven't spoken in 2 weeks. Quite sure she's with another guy now too.

I'm over her. I'm just not over how I felt. I need that attention back. I can't go to sleep and wake up to nothing anymore.

>>17131560
I do not like religion at all. It's a plague to the human mind.

Anon, I can truly say that I can relate to nearly every single said in this, I too feel exactly the same way about nearly everything, I have the knowledge of situations, and I do not act on them, although I can't really find a good example at the moment.

Whenever my dog died, I looked at it die coldly, and I did not care, even so; everyone was sure I would take it the hardest, and that I loved the dog most; probably because it loved me the most.

I love this thread, because I believe it shows true humanity, the true thoughts that we have. and to me, especially, life is like a game of priceless dominos. you never quit, but you work with the number [whatever situation] you get.

The fact is, when you have material items that's only so much, but the emotional side of a being is probably the most important, mentally speaking. you could live in a first world country, a third world, or anything in-between and feel what you're feeling. This also begs the question, of who are we?

we, the individual, who are we? why do we feel these things? of course I know the answer to this, but it is fun to dwell on. Well, not fun but interesting. Life in itself, it fantastic, it is something you will never get a chance at again, I realised this when I was young. I became someone whom knew the keys to the world, but had my priorities set on completely other things. More importantly maintaining my true and inner-self as much as I could.

I acted outwards, extroverted, joked, even so I knew I was different inside, and I tried my best to show that to the people I knew would care.

I met a young lady, a girl whom had been raped at a young age, and lived in crazy conditions, I tried my best to tell her, and she gave me the most compliments I've ever had out of a person, I didn't think I could feel though, I rarely ever felt, unless it was anger or fear. Love was interesting and I tried my best to love her, I really believed I did. but yeah anon. This is interesting.

The person who made the God statement fuck off

Well do you think something is going to happen to make you feel better or do you think you going to still life in the past btw am not judging am just curious

>>17131477
you have come to some realizations that many shy away from :
>you are not in control of your own emotions.
>making yourself emotionally vulnerable to others enables others to emotionally hurt you.
>you need a greater purpose rather then running round "the maze" of life driven by your emotions.

some peoples reactions when they find these realizations is going to individuals/organizations who claim to have the answers you seek as shown ere >>17131560 The harder path is to find your own purpose or destination derived from your own critical thinking and moral compass, anyone who claims to know what that is for you is full of shit.

>>17131477
you're an analytical romantic

1) forget about love for now
2) develop yourself to the point that you know everything about yourself and be able to reason why you value the things you believe

the only advice I have for you is this quote:

>"The higher the climb, the greater the view."

Most people think it means that the greater the hardship, the better the reward.

I think it means the longer you endure, the more you live. Happiness isn't a means to an end. It is the end.

My advice is no advice it is a phase that you will hopefully over come

>>17131477
I would also like to say OP, Loneliness is something I don't feel very often, I try not to give a fuck, but even that is difficult in itself. Everyday I focus on something else, something different, that being politics. but at the end of the day, I'm tired, and do things people would never expect a guy like 'me' to do, listening to music that doesn't even fit who I am, and such things, don't you find this, intriguing? I do at least, the faces that we show people. Anyways, I cannot claim to love you, or even care for you, but I can have an intellectual discussion with you, that's the type of thing which brightens my spirits, maybe not yours.

>>17131586
It seems at first glance we are quite alike my friend. I went through the same things with the pets. I had a dog for twelve years that I was never away from. We had to put her down. I thought I was going to cry forever. I didn't cry at all. I just moved on.
I went through a really bad phase where I just sat around all day everyday under the impression that life was pointless. One day the sun will swallow everything we know and all the history books and achievements will be sucked into nothing. Why should I do anything if thats our fate? I didn't ask to live. But I'm alive.

My step father once told me "If life is truly pointless, then so is you crying about it"

If I didnt hear that statement at that exact moment; I don't know what would have happened to me.

Every action I take in this world is a balancing act. Do I want to upset society? Or myself? I know what's right. I know what society wants. Yet I feel like I'm never the one making the decision

relationships and finding comfort in love is the least rewarding venture in your early 20s. in two years you'll look back at today and think you're dumb as shit just like you can look back now and think about all the things you didn't know when you were 20.

tying your personal growth to another person right now when you're trying to find yourself is only putting yourself in an emotional quagmire. you got your own issues and another person's issues to contend with. does that theoretically sound fun?

instead of getting a relationship to work or figuring out why someone doesn't want to be with you, you should be pouring that angst/effort into diversifying yourself as a person so you can meet/date better people.

learn new stuff. try stuff you haven't tried before. do things that make you feel uncomfortable. you'll fail at almost everything but you'll be a better person at the end of it. you can't ever touch the stars but aiming to touch them will put you closer than other people.

using dating as a comfort source has no other rewards than tying your self worth to another person and maybe a baby that'd really lock your life up.

you just got to think of yourself as a phoenix. in your early 20s you'll reach new lows every year but it's your job to figure a way to rise from the ashes every time. by being aware you're in a low and you have to break through yet another fucking tough life lesson you'll give yourself the strength to not give up and become a shitty bitter person.

making yourself a better version of you will make you okay with hanging out with yourself all the time, and as a side bonus you'll attract a way better class of girl. it's a win/win.

>>17131598
I don't know how to feel or what to do; or what will happen for that matter. Like I said I truly live one second at a time. For all I know a car could break down in front of my house right now and its my soulmate. Or for fun's sake a murderer; and I'm dead. I would like to just try going with the flow.

>>17131624
Yes, I see exactly what you're saying and I have thought the same way. I mean, in life every single thing has an equal and opposite reaction, to an action. What does this cause? well, it causes every single action to be useless, and to not be useless. I have always seen death as a no go, because humans are the most afraid of the unknown, and we do not leave what we know, when there are still things to explore, and experience. it is a matter of principle

I live each and every single day, with that in mind. so, I SEEM to give little fucks about other people, and I seem mean, and like a dick, but only because that's what gets my away from everything else. I'm the type of person to sit in the alone, in the dark, and want privacy, but I also love social interaction, it let's me vent my thoughts, like what I'm doing here. I don't care about animals that much at all, I really don't. and humans die every single day, what's the difference if my mother dies? and that sounds oh so very cold to say, I think I would care somewhat, or even a lot if she passed. but I would care about the girl I love more than anything, or the one I used to love. it is all kinda crazy isn't it? and you know, you are the one making the decisions, they probably just seem so natural, it's like whatever. just kinda "living"..

>>17131601
"Ignorance is bliss" eh..? A quote I've come to love and hate. It's honestly my favorite quote yet. I try to forget about the way I feel and just live like everyone else. I'm not ignorant though and I know bliss is obtainable without it. Wild how well your first three green texts describe me though..

>>17131645
Knowledge in many ways can cause pain, it is bliss because you can live 'clearly', when you are really living in a fog.

>>17131611
It's all too easy for us to put a mask on sometimes. I feel like I'm wearing one around half of the people I know.
It's nice that's all it takes to uplift you my friend.
I don't know what brightens my spirits.

This made me feel a bit better feels nice knowing am not the only one with shit

>>17131651
I don't know what brightens yours either, but discussion is nice nonetheless, and I assume this because you don't seem too introverted.

>>17131627
That quote about the stars really hit home for me man. I have the goosebumps. All the advice you just gave me though; I've given myself. I know the things I need to do to remove myself from this state of mind; yet here I am. I guess that's just part of the human condition

>>17131655
yeah, you definitely aren't the only one, people are never truly alone, usually, when they say they are, not in the world, maybe physically, but there are always people who can share a certain thought, or even feeling, it is humanity at its best, and I love that, I love seeing true humanity, it's why I like things by Ayn Rand, and especially the Diary Of Anne Frank, really showed what it was like to be human, it wasn't the situation she was in that I liked, it was the SHEAR humanity when she wrote, and how she had different sides to herself, per se. it is lovely, really.

>>17131642
Don't worry I understand you completely. People and animals get beaten to a pulp and killed everyday. There's people with no food that are dying as we speak. All of those people or animals could just be our family and our pets. Should I feel better or worse depending on which it is? Then a celebrity dies and the world comes together like they were a God. The values on things are so ass backwards. It's little things like that that will never change and it truly pains me.
I've never dealt with any big deaths in my family. My grandfather died when I was very young.
I don't know how I'm truly going to feel when someone immediately inevitably passes.

>>17131676
Same here, friend. I have the same exact problem, and you know I will just have to wait and see, someone that was close to me, I've been watching suffer, and I'm sort of, at least to myself blank about it? Why? why is it so hard? and you know, i know the answers to these questions, or more likely I do, but I still ask them, I ask them why? if I already know them, and that is probably to look into the topic further.

And to me all lives matter, and should be given the chance to breathe, but once they have done that, and they die, what else could we have done for them, they had their chance, and it was lost. These are the deepest questions we ask ourselves, I remember when I used to care SO much about things when I was younger, I used to cry when I didn't know things on tests, every insult hurt me inside, and socially I was a train wreck. But I had a man, a couple of men, show much more to me, show points I've never seen before, and thus I am now an intellectual power house of information, and thoughts. But, honestly. I stopped caring so much about all of that one day, and wanted to pursue living, and living would be my goal, if I ever wrote down my goal somewhere, it would be to live, a planned life is one that's bound to change, and if it fails, I would only have myself to blame, an unplanned one is an adventure, one through ideas, and such. but yeah, I stopped caring a lot, and now I'm here.

It's strange isn't it?

>>17131664
I try not to label myself. I care about other peoples happiness more than my own. I'd probably sacrifice myself to save anyone if the chance came. When other people are angry or upset I feel like its literally channeling partly through me. I have to remove myself from the room when people have serious arguments. If someone is upset and crying, and I cannot stop them, I'll too get incredibly sad.
It's almost an in-human feeling but I know it's just empathy

>>17131687
I can't think about the future. My head goes blank. When I was a child I'd never put anything down in school under "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I'm 22 and I still don't know.

>>17131655
We all have our problems.

>>17131689 this is where you and I, differ the most. because If I'm in the same room as someone else who is suffering, I can just watch, and I have done it plenty of times, usually when they're suffering in anger though. when someone is crying, I can't help by try to help them, but emotionally I don't feel much for them. and I usually say "I care more about others' which is partly true, but when it comes down to it, I'm the only person I know the most. in this way, I've been labeled as a narcissistic, mean, cold and crude. but anyone that's truly close to me, knows otherwise. they know I can care, but it takes so much, and in this way, I feel in-human.

>>17131697
damn right, I basically did the same thing, or made up something. to me it is about going with the flow, but I know what I care about the most currently, and that would be politics and science, I have no idea what in the hell I'm going to do in those fields if anything, but I just like studying them. I totally accept the fact that you still don't know, I really understand. If I were you, I wouldn't feel too bad about it, and I would keep on, and just try my best to find my place, look into yourself a little, what bothers you the most about society as you see it? and, are you a jack of all trades? these are all questions you have to ask yourself time and time again, until one night, when you're alone in bed, you make a true realisation.

>>17131704
I don't think there is a true definition of human. We may differ there, but at the same time I still understand where you're coming from. If I was in a certain situation I know for a fact I could watch something fucked up happen and not flinch. Me having the mindset that life is pointless has put me in a unique quagmire in the fact that I'm torn between thinking life is pointless and that it's somewhat precious

>>17131666
a chick improv actor from LA has a podcast where she plays a boozy old jewish woman. anyways, in character she always ironically says "the human condition must not apologize for itself." it's meant as a pseudo-deep statement but really it makes profound sense to me.

we know we're down. we know we shouldn't be down. we know we'll feel better someday and we know we'll find a new low, but it still all sucks in the moment anyways.

i think it's all literally conditioning yourself to be comfortable with the fact that you feel like shit at the moment for little reason and you'll be alright. train it like a muscle and your lows will be less low, shorter, and less often. ignore it and life will fuck you raw.

>>17131711
I delved heavily into the UFO conspiracy stuff when I was a teen. It made me hate government and religion. I stemmed away from the negativity of it all and started to view things differently. Accepting we know nothing and that we are just a grain of sand in the universe. I like to think that consciousness and the universe are linked somehow.
What I hate about society the most is the society whoever controlling everything has molded. Everything is just wrong. It'll take more than just the vision of one person to change it. In fact so many already share that vision.

I like basketball. I like seeing peoples faces when they do good in things. I could see myself opening a rec center with concessions and live music. Tournaments. Days for fun. Just a thought. I don't need much.
I just want to connect.

>>17131714
I do believe there is a true definition of human, as someone who focuses on science, a homosapien. and, well, I am stuck in the same position really, is life pointless or precious, I tend to like to think it is precious more than anything, that it is something to truly value, the view that I believe we should all take, however I am not collectivist. But, I simply believe in life over death. and, yeah, I bet you can see where I'm coming from, it is so interesting how we express ourselves, and someone brought this up recently, claiming we could recreate the human mind, perfectly, one day, and that someday robots could feel, and I. I, truly even myself, refused to believe that. the logical person in the group refused, I value our human culture too much to believe metal could take it, and I am an atheist for the most part, keep that in mind. they said you could truly disprove god's existence, even though for years people have been saying, you cannot, but it is stupid to believe in god, of course I argued them with it, but it still bothers me to dwell on that topic in particular.

what is life's true meaning and worth really.

>>17131718
What's fucked is I've learned to enjoy feeling this way sometimes..

>>17131728
If you ask me there isn't a point. We're the result of some massive scale probability pertaining to natural processes we might not ever understand. We're just far enough along and sentient to wonder why and how. I don't think there is an answer. I'm glad there isn't.
Could you imagine a society that didn't need to ask questions anymore? I cannot

>>17131723
when I was a teen, I was discovering the libertarian philosophy and I am still one today, I don't believe there is such a thing as a perfect society we can create, we have been trying to make one for thousands of years, but thievery and certain human attributes will never change, thus society can never be perfect. and I love your ideas, I love how you are thinking, it's so good, and productive to look into things like this, really. I like your way of thinking basically.

>>17131737
a society without an answer let's us continue creating new technology and developing a very large culture to in-rich ourselves in, and I believe in a point, the point is to live, otherwise we wouldn't be here, we are governed by ourselves, we were born, and we must live until we find the most unknown of truths. you know?

It's wonderful, really, the fact that we're here, have you ever wondered what would things be like if you were never born? if you were in darkness? what is our consciousness? when I was young, I was told not to think these things, now it is a past time, a hurtful one.

>>17131742
I try to look at everything with no bias. I try to look at things and situations as if I'm omniscient. When people look at the wonders of the world I don't see how they can't write it off as a God's doing or just human ingenuity. This topic could be a whole another thread so I won't go there.

I'm just me. I don't know anything. Every second is a teacher to me

>>17131752
Sad we throw boundaries on things with children. I think children know everything when they are born. We just strip it away bit by bit with what we think is true.

I thank you guys for your kind words; I truly do. I have to go to sleep for work in the morning. If the thread doesn't 404 I'll read every reply when I wake up. Thanks again y'all.

>>17131759
I do the same thing, and well, the goal of this thread was seemingly just to generally discuss things like this, and, I love your mentality, it is very similar to mine. you learn every single second, and knowledge is what guides us, and let's us, be us. truly. we are our own teachers.

>>17131729

doesn't seemed fuck to me. i feel like I'm winning over on human consciousness when I find humor in my own depression. makes me feel powerful and more objective.

>>17131762
they don't know everything, but they see from a clear view with no biased, however. the first thing you teach them, will give them a biased on the next thing they learn, if that makes any sense to you. they could try to learn everything on their own, but it is quicker and more efficient with bits of slightly true philosophy even though, it usually ends up with people thinking a lot in their teens and early twenties and trying to figure themselves bit by bit, and such.

not related to anything really but this comforts me as someone who tries to find spirituality in science.

>assuming the big bang theory everything that is in the universe was held together in a space smaller than a needle point
>it exploded outwards, creating the universe
>no matter how different I feel from a rock or another person or a sun in a different galaxy, at one time the stuff in me was unimaginably close to that stuff
>everything that is, was, and will be is fucking connected to that small point before the explosion
>just thinking of that small point as the universe before it was the universe
>every form - animal, person, dog, planet, gas - is just the universe experiencing the universe
and navigating itself
>everything is myself and I am everything's self too

>>17131794
Thank you for saying this...

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you need to listen to "lift your head up high" by blood hound gang on repeat.

>>17131581
>I did this to myself.